Post by sunshineluv on Oct 31, 2014 8:18:50 GMT -5
((((Skies))))
I really hope getting that off your chest and "confessing" it to us helps you to feel better. You hit your breaking point, and honestly I don't see how you didn't hit is sooner. You are such a strong woman. Keep in mind, everyone was taken care of and safe, you may look back at moment with what ifs, but even in the midst of your night, everyone was okay. I have some moments and things I said in the midst of my PPD that I regret and am shocked I had those thoughts of feelings, sleep deprivation is really really hard to get through.
Big hugs lady, you amaze me with how you are doing with all the hurdles you have had. Even with your confession.
I did not bounce back from my gall bladder surgery well at all. My mom made me feel worse because she said that she was going places and back to normal activities the day after and made it seem like it was my fault. The surgery was last Tuesday and I'm just now starting to feel normal.
Different people recover at different rates and it's totally normal and not your fault at all!!
This. My recovery from having my wisdom teeth out was so much worse than recovery from knee surgery or childbirth. It's impossible to predict.
I probably should have taken today off from work because I'm sitting through my 3 hr test until 11:30, we're touring a daycare at 1:30, and DS has a parade and party at 3, so I might end up actually doing 4 hours of work today, BUT I worked 12 hour days the past 3 weeks, so I don't feel bad writing this off as comp time. My boss doesn't care as long as I'm reachable by email today, which I am.
((skies)), please never think you're a shit mom! You are an amazing mother and you just needed a little break. Everyone is ok, nothing bad happened (except for your hangover) and you have two adorable boys that love you. It's all good.
I really, really don't like Dave Ramsey, but I do think the envelope system and debt snowball are good tools.
However, I'm no where near the picture of financial intelligence or perfection, so I'm in no place to say anything.
H was going over his yearly earnings and bonus payments last night and it's incredible we don't have more to show for his income. Life is just so expensive. We do splurge, but within reason.
I need to remember we've bought two cars in the last 18 months, paid for an out of network surgery, bought a shit ton of furnitureand paid off my undergrad loans and more than 50% of his grad loans.
Bragplaint, I guess?
I fully admit, I'm biased against Dave Ramsey, because so many of the stuff I see on my Facebook that people post from his blog and other things often imply that all debt issues are because of irresponsibility. I think his hard line approach is good for people who really have no idea how to be fiscally responsible (like going cold-turkey on an addiction), or for people who are getting close to dire straights, but it's not always feasible.Â
I've done a bit of research on his investment recommendations, though, and there are a lot of financial advisers that say his investment recommendations are inaccurate and sometimes irresponsible.Â
I do like the concept of the envelope system.Â
I'm biased against him, too, for similar reasons. Some hard core followers turn me off with their attitude that his way is the only way to be financially responsible.
And I just get annoyed how much churches promote him.
Post by dixeedeluxe on Oct 31, 2014 8:30:52 GMT -5
skies, you also need to be kind to yourself. you work so hard. your kids were in good hands. YOU were in good hands. you seem to be surrounded with people who care. you needed to decompress. i'm sorry you barfed rather than got a nice relaxing buzz on! next time, one glass...then water...then another glass...then snacks and water.
C25K...it works Seaside 5K...........40:45(2012) Turkey Trot..........41:30(2012)/37:08(2013)/37:40(2014) St Pat's 5K..........39:27(2013)/38:48(2014)/35:12(2015) Belair Town Run......38:09(2013)/36:27(2014) Back To Football 5K..37:36(2013)/43:44(2015) Balt Run Fest 5K.....34:59(2013)/41:50(2014)/35:54(2015)
Post by honeybee503 on Oct 31, 2014 8:44:37 GMT -5
I was in jfh's med free birth thread yesterday (don't ask me why. I had two c/s and meds were definitely used) and was confusing Ina May with Ina Garten.
Jeez, not only is she an amazing cook, but a natural birth expert too? What a woman.
skiesthelimit Huge hugs to you. I agree with your Mom, sometimes we need to hit rock bottom to pick ourselves back up. I've been there, and that was before kids and without a huge lack of sleep. I'm glad you are feeling better, and I hope things continue to improve. You are such an amazing Mom, and A knows that. Please give yourself all the credit you deserve.
Last Halloween was my amnio and was the day after we got Violet's genetic diagnosis. I feel like most people aren't thinking about their amnio a year later, but man, that day sucked. It's also upsetting me thinking that Violet wasn't even walking at this time last year. I remember seeing everyone's cute Halloween pics and wishing I could get a pic of her walking in her costume.
#DEBBIEDOWNER
I remember being in Shanghai during that, desperately trying to connect to the WiFi in a hotel to check in on you. Like, I literally remember exactly where I was sitting. #nevertoooverinvested
I did not bounce back from my gall bladder surgery well at all. My mom made me feel worse because she said that she was going places and back to normal activities the day after and made it seem like it was my fault. The surgery was last Tuesday and I'm just now starting to feel normal.
Don't feel bad! My body takes a lot longer to heal, too. When I had an appendectomy, it was a Friday night. They said I could return to work on Monday. I couldn't work for a week, it was bad. Not everybody's body heals the same way! Give yourself time, and ignore people who judge you for it! I hope you're feeling 100% soon!
Last Halloween was my amnio and was the day after we got Violet's genetic diagnosis. I feel like most people aren't thinking about their amnio a year later, but man, that day sucked. It's also upsetting me thinking that Violet wasn't even walking at this time last year. I remember seeing everyone's cute Halloween pics and wishing I could get a pic of her walking in her costume.
#DEBBIEDOWNER
I remember being in Shanghai during that, desperately trying to connect to the WiFi in a hotel to check in on you. Like, I literally remember exactly where I was sitting. #nevertoooverinvested
I really enjoy my free time during the day when A is napping. When dh comes home early, during naptime, I feel robbed of quiet time to myself. I really like routine and I feel like when he shows up, it messes me up. Luckily, it only happens a few times a month.
Eta: I always act so happy to see him but inside it's like, "great, quiet time out the window."
I feel this way when DH comes home early. On one hand, I love it because it means I can pick him up at the train station on the way home from daycare, and I don't have any solo-parenting time at all. On the other hand, I'm always planning to leave for DC pickup at a certain time, so it's disruptive to get a text saying, "I'm leaving work early, can you pick me up??" Sure, but it would have been good to know ahead of time!
I hate the kids that live on my street. They are all misbehaved rude snots. I can't decide if I am going to hand out candy yet because I dislike these kids that much. Plus, I basically ate all the candy.
Oh skiesthelimit, I'm so sorry to read that. But seriously, you have handled SO much with BOTH of your kids - I really believe that most people would have snapped a lot earlier. You're incredibly strong. And what happened was exactly the "right" way to snap. You had people around you who could love you and care for you and also care for A. Hopefully you can make changes now that will help you get back on track. You are not at ALL a shit mom, you're an amazing woman doing such a good job. You are going to get through this. Sending you lots of love and hugs today,
I'll be 29 in 10 days... and I am struggling with it big time. I didn't think being closer to 30 would bother me, and I don't think 30 is old AT ALL. So, I don't know why it's hard for me to be at the end of my 20's, but it is. I keep telling myself, my best years are ahead of me. Hopefully if I repeat that enough, I'll feel better.
skiesthelimit big hugs. I'm glad your mom was there to help you and give you all the hugs! Sometimes you DO have to hit rock bottom to start fresh. And look at all the success you have achieved in the last few weeks! Amazing.
musiclover I'm a mod and cat19 is the other mod. I'm usually here. I pop in, pop out, pop back in.
I think a lot of hugs are needed in this thread. I'm passing them out so whoever needs one, come get one.
skiesthelimit. You are an awesome mom. I'm impressed you didn't break down sooner. Sleep deprivation is no joke. Someone (@jermys) once posted a story in ML that has stuck with me.
She said everyone needs a friend that they can call and use this phrase, "come take this kid. Now." And the friend would do it. No questions asked. It sounds like your mom is that friend.
Oh, goodness, skiesthelimit, huge hugs. You are not a bad mom. You're so strong for having come this far, but you can only take so much. I hope you're able to figure something out and you know you can always talk to us.
Skies you are an amazing mother. I've had similar breakdown and didn't even have the stress of kids at the time. You are awesome and have been through a lot. You are a fantastic mother to your boys and an excellent advocate for them and their needs.
I did not bounce back from my gall bladder surgery well at all. My mom made me feel worse because she said that she was going places and back to normal activities the day after and made it seem like it was my fault. The surgery was last Tuesday and I'm just now starting to feel normal.
I was in the hospital for a week after my gallbladder surgery. Don't feel bad, it's different for everyone.