Eh, sometimes I get fleeting feelings like this for events because my brain goes straight to organizing the logistics. Then I remember that I'm always free to say no and that I love my friends and family (most of them, haha) and chill out.
Uh, we had our wedding on Sunday of Labor Day weekend. Yes, it was significantly cheaper. Yes, we were paying for it ourselves, so that made a big difference. It required a ton of traveling for our guests. Every single one still, to this day, raves about what a great time they had.
We invited 120 people and had about 60 in attendance. If people couldn't or didn't want to come, they didn't. No bother to us.
Don't go. Send a gift if you feel so inclined. Or don't do that either.
I am being a dick and complaining and if it's flammable so be it. I would never say anything to my friends and have confined myself to bitching right here right now and to DH.
Post by irishbride2 on Feb 28, 2015 9:48:24 GMT -5
I hate long weekend weddings but I don't blame the couple. The issue for me is h and I disagree strongly about weddings. He views an invitation as a summons. But I would prefer to say no to most of them. So it causes drama and I hate hate hate using our very small travel budgets on weddings of people we barely know.
Post by littlesthobo on Feb 28, 2015 10:16:06 GMT -5
Listen, if I were sitting here in the grips of the coldest winter since the ice age, with only daydreams of the warm weather to come to get me through the misery, only to find that ALL of my summer long weekends have ALREADY been booked up, I'd probably be (temporarily) pretty frustrated. I feel you.
My BIL's wedding is on Sunday this Memorial Day in a very expensive tourist destination. Lodging is insane (hotel "cheap rate" was about $300/night - but we decided to rent a 5br home with other couples to save $$). Thankfully, we can drive there in about 8 hours and save the outrageous plane tickets.
If there is gonna be booze and cake at these weddings there really is nothing to complain about. And if you don't like booze or cake well I can't help ya.
I think this is my main issue. My family has a longstanding family reunion weekend on the August long weekend and we usually host a Canada Day party at our house in July. We missed both of those events last summer (by choice) and will be doing the same this year. Otherwise, we are at my parent's cottages. We can and do go on other weekends but there are more people who make the trip on long weekends and it is so nice to be able to get together with the extended family.
It's your cousin's wedding. Aren't you still getting together with the family?
Post by sparkythelawyer on Feb 28, 2015 11:45:40 GMT -5
Also, the "we had a holiday/Sunday/Friday weekend and everyone keeps telling us how awesome it was" slay me. Are there people in your lives that cone to you after the wedding and say "Cripes your wedding sucked?" People will put on a happy fave and go to weddings on those dates, bit few are actually excited about it giving up their holiday weekend.
Post by RoxMonster on Feb 28, 2015 11:52:45 GMT -5
We all vent about silly stuff that bothers us, and I know you aren't actually saying any of this to the brides/grooms. But I do think you need to chill on this. We're invited to a Memorial Day weekend wedding for a family friend that we are not at all close with, never see or talk to, and we'd have to miss out on the wine festival we always go to and get drunk at that weekend. So we're sending regrets and a card. Bam.
I really don't get the hate/animosity from anyone saying they don't get why people do holiday weekend weddings and that everyone hates them. Not everyone hates them. Not everyone has special plans for holiday weekends. For some, it may be easier to attend because they wouldn't have to take a day off work if they live far away. And even if some guests do hate them, who cares? They can say no and not attend.
I personally prefer weddings during the summer because I'm not working and don't have to take time off work to travel if it's far. But I also understand that not everyone wants to get married in the summer. So if I can't make it work, I send regrets. This is not worth getting worked up over.
I'm actually not the only person who is frustrated with my cousin's choice of date and location, and he told our Grandmother last week that he regrets the choice but is tied to it now.
I'm going to guess that the likelihood of him actually being all "omg I ruined family holiday!" Is far less than the fact that he regrets it because people are making him feel like a shitpig for choosing a date that worked well for him and his bride. Which is a bummer, because it's their day and all.
Post by captainobvious on Feb 28, 2015 12:28:52 GMT -5
We have a friend getting married the Saturday of Memorial Day weekend at an awesome farm that's in the middle of no where. I was ready to whine about it, but H suggested we stay at the nearby casino that night then go to Temecula wine country for my bday the next day since it'll be a shorter drive. Now I want to thank them. Lol
Post by W.T.Faulkner on Feb 28, 2015 12:31:19 GMT -5
OP, would you like to be my date to the wedding I'm in in August, the one that will require my presence for four solid days at festivities leading up to the wedding? The one that's a double wedding and the couples have about a job and a half between them and the one bride faked leukemia for a year?