If you are willing to take a vacation day off for a "normal" wedding, why don't you just take a Monday off some other weekend and create your own 3 day weekend if you're so salty about losing one??
My wedding was on Labor Day weekend on Sunday and it was literally half price. I would not have been able to have the quality of wedding that I did if I had had it another day. Nice venue, good food, open bar, etc. Sorry I didn't want to waste another 5k on my wedding (for the exact same experience otherwise) so you could have an extra day off #sorrynotsorry. If people didn't want to come, they didn't come.
OP, would you like to be my date to the wedding I'm in in August, the one that will require my presence for four solid days at festivities leading up to the wedding? The one that's a double wedding and the couples have about a job and a half between them and the one bride faked leukemia for a year?
Post by aprilsails on Feb 28, 2015 12:45:48 GMT -5
I get it, my OP and subsequent posts were whiny and harsh and over the top. I went off and quilted out my anger and bad mood from early this morning.
Everyone who schedules a wedding has 15,000 considerations that they are taking into account. My family's weekend plans are not among them. It's a shitty coincidence that every single long weekend got booked this summer.
I have never declined a wedding invite and I really don't want to now, but will probably choose to skip two of these. While I could fairly easily attend the May wedding and could visit friends in that area, DH just found out it is a dry wedding which has made him 100% against it. Every wedding is a dry wedding for me this year,but if he isn't willing to go then I'm not interested in travelling 5 hours at 6 months pregnant on my own.
I have way more vacation time than money, so I'm not a fan of the long holiday weddings. If it's in town, I definitely don't care.
Thankfully, I know almost no one that has done them--people here seem to get married in Sept-Nov mostly.
Lately we've had to pass on weddings that are out of the country. Everyone else has gotten married in town or been family weddings in the Midwest that we try to go to.
Sounds like my stepmother who complained and complained, when I picked to get married on a Friday. It was cheaper for us and we were paying for it. I knew that my family and friends who wanted to be there would. If they couldn't, I understood. If it causes that much stress, just stay home. I wanted happy happy guests at my wedding.
I get it, my OP and subsequent posts were whiny and harsh and over the top. I went off and quilted out my anger and bad mood from early this morning.
Everyone who schedules a wedding has 15,000 considerations that they are taking into account. My family's weekend plans are not among them. It's a shitty coincidence that every single long weekend got booked this summer.
I have never declined a wedding invite and I really don't want to now, but will probably choose to skip two of these. While I could fairly easily attend the May wedding and could visit friends in that area, DH just found out it is a dry wedding which has made him 100% against it. Every wedding is a dry wedding for me this year,but if he isn't willing to go then I'm not interested in travelling 5 hours at 6 months pregnant on my own.
You should have lead with the dry wedding thing, I'm pretty sure you would have gotten more sympathy;)
If you are willing to take a vacation day off for a "normal" wedding, why don't you just take a Monday off some other weekend and create your own 3 day weekend if you're so salty about losing one?
I'm due at the end of August and DH will be saving up every vacation day he has for when the baby comes. These are really going to be our only longer breaks from work until that time. We made one of the long weekend weddings last summer into a huge vacation trip, which I would be love to have been able to do again this year, but it's not in the cards.
OP, would you like to be my date to the wedding I'm in in August, the one that will require my presence for four solid days at festivities leading up to the wedding? The one that's a double wedding and the couples have about a job and a half between them and the one bride faked leukemia for a year?
REAL TALK.
HEY.
I was just trying to make a point, I swear. You know it's only you, boo.
You should have lead with the dry wedding thing, I'm pretty sure you would have gotten more sympathy;)
agreed! i'm pretty sure dry weddings and how much they suck (not to mention how tacky they are), is the gbcn unity horse.
missing my beloved bonfire? dramatic and ridiculous.
also OP - when you have your baby shower, stop for a moment and look around the room. 89% of the attendees are counting down the minutes until they can leave b/c you just ruined their entire saturday or sunday. just an FYI.
The bride and groom are devout Muslims so I really didn't expect anything different. I also know the food will be absolutely amazing.
My family generally holds showers on weeknights. No one will be travelling. I've skipped a few bridal and baby showers in my time and will not be put out by others missing it as well. I guess that's how I need to view these weddings.
agreed! i'm pretty sure dry weddings and how much they suck (not to mention how tacky they are), is the gbcn unity horse.
missing my beloved bonfire? dramatic and ridiculous.
also OP - when you have your baby shower, stop for a moment and look around the room. 89% of the attendees are counting down the minutes until they can leave b/c you just ruined their entire saturday or sunday. just an FYI.
The bride and groom are devout Muslims so I really didn't expect anything different. I also know the food will be absolutely amazing.
My family generally holds showers on weeknights. No one will be travelling. I've skipped a few bridal and baby showers in my time and will not be put out by others missing it as well. I guess that's how I need to view these weddings.
you should probably check your reflection in a truth mirror
The bride and groom are devout Muslims so I really didn't expect anything different. Â I also know the food will be absolutely amazing.
My family generally holds showers on weeknights.  No one will be travelling. I've skipped a few bridal and baby showers in my time  and will not be put out by others missing it as well.  I guess that's how I need to view these weddings.
you should probably check your reflection in a truth mirror
What? You've never heard of the traditional Canadian Tuesday night baby shower? Because that's totally a thing.
I, too, hate when wedding invitations don't come with that nifty "decline" box. Oh, wait.
Long weekend wedding here. Haters gonna hate.
Oh man, when we get married I am going to send out invitations with two "yes" boxes. No decline option for you! It would be a hilarious way to fuck with my friends.
Post by irishbride2 on Feb 28, 2015 13:54:37 GMT -5
SO I would never throw one BUT I'm really jealous of the weeknight shower. I would sooo much rather do that then give up, most of a family day to go to showers, which I really do not enjoy.
All I want to do on weeknights is be in my pajamas by 6 p.m.
See if rather just go to a shower after work and get it over with and then not have to spend all morning on a Saturday getting dressed up doing my hair and make up and then missing hours of time with my kids.
Post by oliviapope on Feb 28, 2015 14:08:46 GMT -5
I actually agree with you. I don't get mad about it, often I still go, but holiday weekend weddings are annoying to me as well. Both of my brothers, three cousins, and my SILs weddings were on holidays. They said so "people could travel".
It ended up being MUCH more expensive travel, hotel, and rental car. Reservations were hard to get even in advance. With the job I had at the time it is if result difficult to take off before or after a holiday weekend. Travel was packed and it took longer to get there and get home. Restaurants/activities in the cities they got married in were packed. Gas was more expensive.
Also, I was annoyed because we use our long weekends for couples trips because vacation time we use for family stuff.
That being said, they can choose to get married when and how they like. I can choose to attend or decline. However, many couples think they are doing a service by choosing a holiday weekend-when those come with their own challenges.
I'd be pleased that I was invited to so many happy events. But if I couldn't go, then I would suck it up, RSVP that I wasn't going, and then do my own thing.
Just be happy you're being invited to all those events. As you get older, you'll get less and less wedding invitations and more baby shower invites.
"Why would you ruin perfectly good peanuts by adding candy corn? That's like saying hey, I have these awesome nachos, guess I better add some dryer lint." - Nonny
I'd be pleased that I was invited to so many happy events. But if I couldn't go, then I would suck it up, RSVP that I wasn't going, and then do my own thing.
Just be happy you're being invited to all those events. As you get older, you'll get less and less wedding invitations and more baby shower invites.
Before you know it, it's just funerals .
And it's done by word of mouth rather than engraved invitations. lol
"Why would you ruin perfectly good peanuts by adding candy corn? That's like saying hey, I have these awesome nachos, guess I better add some dryer lint." - Nonny
I am irrationally irritated at all of the irrational irritation at some harmless venting. Screw all of you.
Eh. I counted no less than 20 paragraphs, and I skipped one-sentence paragraphs, about her boo-hoo, woe-is-me-my-peeps-are-so-thoughtless wedding conundrum. I'm not irritated (I will admit to being irrational about it though) -- just drop it already. You made your point! (OP, not you).
Okay, I'm irritated, too. And pissy. Can I join the pissy club today? I slept in mascara last night and my eyeballs are all wonky now.
Also, the "we had a holiday/Sunday/Friday weekend and everyone keeps telling us how awesome it was" slay me. Are there people in your lives that cone to you after the wedding and say "Cripes your wedding sucked?" People will put on a happy fave and go to weddings on those dates, bit few are actually excited about it giving up their holiday weekend.
This makes me LOL too. At my cousin's wedding, they had GUESTS move the chairs from the ceremony to the reception AND break down the tables and chairs after the reception. Tacky as fuck! Of course, not a single one of us said that their wedding was anything less than lovely to the bride and groom.
Post by RoxMonster on Feb 28, 2015 15:35:21 GMT -5
I think the weeknight shower thing is a perfect example of how you will never please everybody for any kind of event, ever. About half of the people here are on team "Hell no, weeknights are for PJs" (that is my team, by the way) and half are "I don't want to give up a Saturday for a shower." Well, actually I'm on team "I really dislike showers whenever they are but go anyway."
It just goes to show that even if you hold events at times that are typically accepted (like a Saturday shower), some people will not prefer that. They either hate it enough to not go, or they suck it up and go for the guest of honor anyway and smile and maybe end up having a good time. I guess this is why I don't get the rage about holiday weekend weddings. Some love it, some hate it. It's the same as any event ever. Just do what works for the guest(s) of honor and the people they most want to come.