AE (Reg) Need to vent about job search

[needjobadvice]

So it will be easy to figure out who this is an I'm ok with that. I just don't want this tied to my name. 


So I'm a teacher. I'm also at a type of school where giving notice after January or February (for the following school year) is unheard of. I also am tied to the school in many ways and feel very connected to it. My kids go there (and will continue to do so). My social life is all centered around the school. (in various forms). 

But, I've recently been passed over for a promotion and the odds of it coming up again in the next 5 years are slim to none. I have zero path for advancement. I either stay a classroom teacher or leave. 

My plan was to stay, even though I'm frustrated. I do like teaching. I love the school. 

But recently it has become clear that my previously expensive insurance is now BEYOND expensive. To lay it out there in $, we pay about 14,000 a year in premiums, and at a minimum will likely spend around 15,000 extra every 2-3 years on a reaccuring expense. This doesn't include any other medical issues that pop up year to year. So lets just say, on averae, we spend 20,000 a year on medical related things. This is about 45% of my salary. 

I've had a second career path I've always semi regretted not exploring. It fits my strengths and personality really well. Well about a week after we got the news about our crazy expenses, H introduced me to the CEO of a firm who does this other career and I jokingly made a comment about how I should have become one. He said "we are hiring right now and we love to hire teachers and convert them because of X,Y,&Z. So set up an interview this week."

I did. I nailed it. I got an email yesterday saying my offer is in the mail. (Which is annoying as hell. It didn't arrive today so now I have to wait until TUESDAY). 

I have no clue what salary will be. I do know their benifits package and their insurance plan is SO much better and SO much cheaper for us. That alone will save us a ton. So even if they offer me the same amount of money, it would be worth it financially to switch. We would pay 4,800 in premimums and have a 3,000 deductible and the expensive thing we buy every 2-3 years is covered 100% after the deductible. 

There is a very clear path of potential advancement, which excites me. And in this particular field being an awkward introvert doesn't hurt you lol. It helps you relate to the rest of your coworkers. 


I want the damn letter because it could make my decision easy for me. But I'm a giant ball of stress about this. If I quit my job right now, I will forever burn a ton of bridges no matter what I do. And I love my colleagues. I adore them. And the new job comes with some risk as well. What if I hate it? What if I don't pass the tests I will have to take to become certified? (they aren't a walk in the park).

I'm more just venting because H doesn't want to hear about it anymore, lol. 
 

[ChillyMcFreeze]

Have you signed a contract for next school year yet?

[nancybotwin]

As someone also in education who made a very unpopular decision to switch jobs at a bad time, I say go for it -- your work would never have that same loyalty to you.

[ChillyMcFreeze]

May 23, 2015 17:47:03 GMT -5 pennypenny said:

I have never felt that level of loyalty to a job. I would wait for the offer letter, but from everything you posted I would go for it. You can always go back to teaching right, even if not at the same school.

This is my thought exactly. Teaching will be waiting for you if you hate this job. They have all summer to find your replacement. 

[gpw]

May 23, 2015 17:47:03 GMT -5 pennypenny said:

I have never felt that level of loyalty to a job. I would wait for the offer letter, but from everything you posted I would go for it. You can always go back to teaching right, even if not at the same school.

Yeah.  A long time ago I felt loyalty, but anymore?  Nope.  The places we work have no such loyalty to me, and I will have no such loyalty to them. 

[LadySusan]

You gotta go for it! I'm certain that you will anger some people but because your children will still attend, you will be forced to see each other. This is a good thing. You can rebuild most relationships with time. I think it will be okay.

If the transition is going to be truly difficult maybe you could plan to see a therapist temporarily?

[noodleskooze]

May 23, 2015 17:51:30 GMT -5 nancybotwin said:

As someone also in education who made a very unpopular decision to switch jobs at a bad time, I say go for it -- your work would never have that same loyalty to you.

MLer lurking on CEP, but THIS! And way to go!

[niemand88f]

Absolutely go for it, it sounds like a great opportunity that could lead to even better things. It's not like you're giving notice a week before the new year starts, they'll have plenty of time to find a replacement - don't let that hold you back.

[josieposy]

As someone who made a career leap and is MUCH happier, I have to bust out the old cliché that you miss 100% the shots you don't take.

Seriously, the hardest part is jumping. Once that part is over, you will feel much better.

ETA: I'm tired and apparently suck at clichés.

[cville]

TAKE THE JOB.

Seriously. Blah blah burned bridges (which may not be as bad as you think, given that they have THE ENTIRE SUMMER to find another teacher) vs. Incredible new opportunities with financial upside.

You can always go back to teaching.

[4speedy]

I want to add is that my cousin taught for 3 years out of college and made about $30k. She made an offhand comment to a table partner at a wedding about his line of work. He said he loved to hire former teachers. She interviewed the following week and within 2 months had changed careers so that she was managing relationships with commercial cargo customers for a major airline. She got great benefits, next to free travel and her pay went from $30k to over $100k overnight. And she met her husband, who does some sort of import/export law. She has never, ever regretted leaving teaching.

[noodleskooze]

ALSO you are not leaving them in the lurch. There are always people applying to teaching jobs late in the summer (looking at you, 4-years-ago DH!).

[cookiemdough]

Take the job. Why wouldn't you?

[bears]

I can't believe they told you the offer was in the mail without giving you any info! I would be going bananas on a holiday weekend over that email.

While you feel an obligation to your school for a variety of reasons, you need to put your family first. Your loyalty is to them and yourself. Right now, you don't even know if taking this job would be the right decision for you. I would sit down tonight, write down all the pros and cons of taking the job, then put it in a drawer for the weekend. It'll be an incomplete list until you get the offer letter, but that just means you can put the list away for the next few days and put it in the back of your mind while you enjoy the weekend.

My fingers are crossed that the offer is a good one!

[thejackpot]

DO it!!

Ok, what are all these jobs that teachers are transitioning to?? Just researching

[wawa]

would this by any chance involve switching into a career field similar to mine?

Just guessing based on who I'm pretty sure this is and the exam part.

[joenali]

What do you mean burn bridges? You give notice and you move on. Keep your certificate up to date just in case you aren't happy with a new job. I could not imagine paying $14,000 for insurance. That would make me quit teaching right then and there. And I love my teaching job. People move on, I would hope that everyone you work with understands.

[secretlyevil]

Give notice and take the job. It's no different than any other job.

[needjobadvice]

I know they could luck out and find a good teacher, but in the independent school world (at least our subset of it) the good teachers are mostly snatched up by now. Plus, they wouldn't be able to get a them to actually teach a class as part of the interview process, which makes or breaks you. UGH. And my particular subject/grade level is one of the hardest to fill because generally those who teach my subject do not want to teach my grade level.

I worry so much because I love the kids and I love my coworkers and I'm very connected to this school. I'm an alum, too. I know I'm overinvested, but I can't help it.

But thats also the issue. I let my certification lapse many years ago (since I do not need it at independent schools) so public schools are out. And if I do go back to teaching in an independent school locally they would immediately talk to my old school and I don't want to burn bridges if I need a rec later.

I KNOW I'M OVERTHINKING IT! But since I'm sitting here waiting for the damn letter it is what I will continue to do until Tuesday.


wawa  Actuary

[origami]

I used to do contract work for a private school and teachers quit at any time, incl August. So I don't know how this particular school manages to know so far in advance. Maybe they just have low turnover? Anyway, I think you should take the new job and just do the best you can to explain you "have" to do this, not that you "want" to, so that you hopefully won't burn bridges with your friends. Anyone who can't understand why you can't pay 45% in medical expenses is being an ass. Of course you can't pay that. If your kids will still attend the school Id like to think that will help. There is plenty of time for them to replace you. I actually think it's great timing because this year is almost over.

[teflepi]

May 23, 2015 20:01:46 GMT -5 needjobadvice said:

I know they could luck out and find a good teacher, but in the independent school world (at least our subset of it) the good teachers are mostly snatched up by now. Plus, they wouldn't be able to get a them to actually teach a class as part of the interview process, which makes or breaks you. UGH. And my particular subject/grade level is one of the hardest to fill because generally those who teach my subject do not want to teach my grade level.

I worry so much because I love the kids and I love my coworkers and I'm very connected to this school. I'm an alum, too. I know I'm overinvested, but I can't help it.

But thats also the issue. I let my certification lapse many years ago (since I do not need it at independent schools) so public schools are out. And if I do go back to teaching in an independent school locally they would immediately talk to my old school and I don't want to burn bridges if I need a rec later.

I KNOW I'M OVERTHINKING IT! But since I'm sitting here waiting for the damn letter it is what I will continue to do until Tuesday.


wawa  Actuary

You are.  People find teachers all the time, esp in prestigious independent schools.  People leave all the time.  If you are so tied to the school, and explain the concern, they will understand.  

You are not out, most likely.  If you are who I think you are, PM me. I am happy to help you get reinstated and then you can do interstate reciprocity.  All is very doable.

[NewOrleans]

May 23, 2015 19:00:18 GMT -5 thejackpot said:

DO it!!

Ok, what are all these jobs that teachers are transitioning to?? Just researching

Asking for a friend here, too. 

OP, go and don't turn back.  Education is godforsaken.  There is a brilliant future for you somewhere else.   I hope your offer is great. And don't worry about the timeline.  The school has months to replace your position.  Their timing tradition is not your concern.  

[needjobadvice]

Thanks everyone. I feel better.

Now I just have to wait...

[wawa]

Do it! Its funny because thats a job I didnt even know existed when I was in college but totally would have persued.

change is scary. But you can do it.

[noodleskooze]

OP, I am trying to leave my small independent school (where, like you, I am an alum) for something bigger and better, and it is SO DAMN HARD. I understand completely how your emotions are tied into this place and understand the loyalty you feel to it as well. But they will understand and they will find someone. I was so afraid everyone would be mad or catty when I decided to leave, but they've been nothing but supportive--some have even given me job leads.

[scout8]

You have to do what is right for you. I say go for it. I made a major career change 15 years ago and it was one of the best decisions of my life.

[starlily]

May 23, 2015 17:51:55 GMT -5 gpw said:

May 23, 2015 17:47:03 GMT -5 pennypenny said:

I have never felt that level of loyalty to a job. I would wait for the offer letter, but from everything you posted I would go for it. You can always go back to teaching right, even if not at the same school.

Yeah.  A long time ago I felt loyalty, but anymore?  Nope.  The places we work have no such loyalty to me, and I will have no such loyalty to them. 

Exactly.

I'd be stalking the mailman on Tuesday. Good luck OP!

[orangeblossom]

I would go for it.

It's easy to think of the what ifs, and what will they do and burned bridges, etc, but trust me, they'll keep on keeping on, and so will you.

Employers who continually pass you over for advancement and/or don't have opportunity for advancement can't be surprised when someone leaves. This on top of piss poor benefits, they have to know they'll lose folks from time to time.

Thems the breaks.

[Velar Fricative]

There is zero question that I'd go for this new job. No hesitation.

[BicycleBride]

May 23, 2015 20:01:46 GMT -5 needjobadvice said:

Actuary

DH is an actuary. The exams and studying is really rough. I just asked him to describe the studying and he said "you can't really know what you are getting in to until you are in it and realize holy crap this is eating away my entire life... and soul." DS and I generally don't see him but for a few minutes a day in the month or so leading up to an exam. I'm not saying you shouldn't do it, but it's a crazy set up. Some of his colleagues have been taking tests for 15+ years. He says the preliminary tests aren't that bad though.