So remember how my husband would take like 3 hours to clean the kitchen after dinner, with multiple breaks? While I sat there wanting to murder him and get rid of the body? for basically our entire marriage?
I recently decided: fuck that shit. I've been nagging and unhappy for ten years. I'll just take 15 minutes to clean myself right after dinner while he gets the kids ready for bed. (why did I not do this earlier? PRINCIPLES. I make dinner, he should clean)
Except you know, he is eating dessert. and then a snack. and then drinking some water. and then sitting down to check his email. IT'S SEVEN FUCKING THIRTY, MOVE YO ASS. (It's 9pm now, I know, I am TELLING A STORY OK?)
So he starts walking around saying: "oooooh boy. ooooh boy oh boy, somebody is intense tonight. somebody is passionate about cleaning the kitchen. ooooh boy". I WISH I WAS MAKING THIS SHIT UP.
I almost killed him. THEN THEN THEN HE GOES "Are you on your....nevermind, it is safer not to ask the question".
That's when I really killed him.
(we are not on speaking terms since that incident. good thing he is dead now)
I don't even know what I would do if my H started in on me about being intense about cleaning. Probably screech FUCKING MOTHERFUCKER I WILL FUCKING END YOU.
I don't even know what I would do if my H started in on me about being intense about cleaning. Probably screech FUCKING MOTHERFUCKER I WILL FUCKING END YOU.
I don't even know what I would do if my H started in on me about being intense about cleaning. Probably screech FUCKING MOTHERFUCKER I WILL FUCKING END YOU.
I am also "intense" when I clean like a normal human being according to my husband.
H and I get in a fight always the night before the cleaning lady. He. Thinks I "intense" for wanting to pick up the house before she cleans. Like you know not leave dirty laundry on the floor and dirty dishes on the counter. Rowr
I am also "intense" when I clean like a normal human being according to my husband.
H and I get in a fight always the night before the cleaning lady. He. Thinks I "intense" for wanting to pick up the house before she cleans. Like you know not leave dirty laundry on the floor and dirty dishes on the counter. Rowr
omg yes. That's the worst. SHE WON'T CLEAN THE FLOOR IF IT IS COVERED IN CRAP.
I think it's because they're looking at the house with their "man eyes," which are the same eyes that prevent them from seeing anything if it's not immediately in front of their faces. "Oh, this house doesn't look like it could be featured on Hoarders. I mean, there aren't actual trash piles around. It's fine." CLUTTER IS NOT OKAY JUST BECAUSE IT ISN'T LITERAL GARBAGE.
"Why would you ruin perfectly good peanuts by adding candy corn? That's like saying hey, I have these awesome nachos, guess I better add some dryer lint." - Nonny
Wtf is up with husbands taking hours to do the dishes? Or unload the dishwasher? Or engage in any other chore or unfavorable task? Mine is the same way and it drives me crazy. It's not effing rocket science, buddy! The faster you do it, the quicker it will be done, and then you can go back to sitting on the couch!
Post by scottyderp on Nov 25, 2015 22:05:22 GMT -5
What a dingledork, papie, I'm sorry.
Can you imagine what a man would do if he was told, "You're having your SO's period this month, get ready." "Sure, I can do this. I AM MAN." He'd pass a clot and he'd call his mommy is what he'd do, and he'd go to the ER.