I can't stop thinking about you and the boys. I wish I had the right words for you, please know I am thinking of you. I can't begin to imagine how you are feeling, ((hugs))
Post by unclejesse on Sept 26, 2016 7:20:10 GMT -5
Ditto what everyone has said. We love you so much and please post whenever you just need to get it out, at least one of us will be around at any hour. You are a very strong woman, and you are allowed to feel however you feel for as long as you can. Keep holding those sweet boys, your H will always live on through them. Love you.
Post by Faevantastic on Sept 26, 2016 7:20:56 GMT -5
Oh M, I'm here for you as well. I've seen first hand how wonderful your family is. I know you and your boys are surrounded by love. You have our support and love here as well.
These are a few books with black characters that I know people have used.
Everett Anderson's Goodbye--This is about a little boy who loses his dad. It goes through the stages of grief and is a little bit mature with wording, but is good.
When My Daddy Died by KJ Reider.-Has some religious talk in in but a pretty good book.
Sunflowers and Rainbows for Tia, Saying Good Bye to Daddy---This one has a little girl as the main character dealing with her father's sudden death.
I'm sorry that I don't have more. We do have a bunch of books that use animals instead of people as the main characters for kids in A&J's age group.
Post by sunshineluv on Sept 26, 2016 7:28:44 GMT -5
M,
I am so so sorry you are going through this nightmare. You will get through this. You can do it, minute by minute day by day. This isn't fair and I doubt you will ever understand it, it's a horrible tragedy. Like the others I wish we could swoop in and hold your hand through this.
P was an amazing man. He had so much charm, he lit up a room and everyone loved him. We wanted to be bff's with him after just a few hours of meeting him. He was a wonderful dad and husband. Your boys may have lost their dad, but his legacy will live on through them. He has his genes, and you to keep his memory alive.
You got this my dear, it may not seem like it now, but you will get through this. For those sweet boys.
I love you, and I am praying and praying for you to have an ounce of comfort.
These are a few books with black characters that I know people have used.
Everett Anderson's Goodbye--This is about a little boy who loses his dad. It goes through the stages of grief and is a little bit mature with wording, but is good.
When My Daddy Died by KJ Reider.-Has some religious talk in in but a pretty good book.
Sunflowers and Rainbows for Tia, Saying Good Bye to Daddy---This one has a little girl as the main character dealing with her father's sudden death.
I'm sorry that I don't have more. We do have a bunch of books that use animals instead of people as the main characters for kids in A&J's age group.
Thank you. I just left the bookstore and they didn't have any in store. jamaicam I will get books and send them to the boys. We can all help you get through this.
Post by sandj82110 on Sept 26, 2016 7:37:23 GMT -5
I don't have anything new to add so I'll echo everyone else. Please lean on us anytime, someone is always here. Just take it moment by moment, if you don't want to answer the phone or see friends, then don't.
Please be sure to take care of yourself right now, I know that's probably the furthest thing from your mind right now but please don't forget about you.
I'll keep an eye out for any books that I think might be helpful.
M, I am absolutely heartbroken for you and your boys. Right now you don't have to anything but take it minute by minute. You have a lot of women all over willing to help you in whatever way we can. Please lean on us.
Post by laurensmomma on Sept 26, 2016 7:54:26 GMT -5
I want nothing more than to give you whatever support you need, and I hate that not a single one of us is near you. Please know that I will do whatever I can. I wish we could make this go away for you.
Oh M, I'm so sorry you have to walk this path now. It's so unfair and I HATE this for you. You and the boys are loved and we will help you in any way you need it.
M, take care of you and your boys first, and don't worry about anything or anybody else right now. Hide, scream, cry, vent... You do what you need to do. Please add me to your "anytime day or night" list. I wish I could be there for you, but know I'm wrapping you and the boys in as much light and love as I can. We love you and we are here for you.
Post by spaghetticat on Sept 26, 2016 8:25:51 GMT -5
So much love to you, M. If there's any way we can run interference for you or help you in the smallest or biggest ways please let us know. We are here for anything we can do. So much love to you.
Your family has consumed most of my thoughts lately. It's ok if you have to take life second by second, breath by breath. You're far too young to deal with this and my heart aches for you.
Emerson Kate, born 38w5d on 4/6/12 at 6:02 p.m., 5 lbs 13 oz and 18 3/4 inches. Lucas Matthew, born 39w5d on 4/11/14 at 8:20 a.m., 7 lbs 4 oz and 20 inches.
Post by browneyedhunni85 on Sept 26, 2016 8:42:32 GMT -5
I can't get you guys off my mind. We are here for you any time, any day. I wish I could take the pain away that you and the boys are feeling. We love you so much.
Your family has been in the forefront of my thoughts.
Just know, it's okay to be a mess. Lean on the people you need to right now. I really wish I could just hug you and the boys and protect you. From my experience with my mom, many people don't know what to say or say things they think are helpful or comforting but are not. That compounded my anger and grief. Please take advantage of those of us here and IRL that you can talk to and vent to. Some people will instinctively take over and do the things that you need, but if they don't, tell them what you need. If you don't know what you need, tell them that and make them figure it out.
Post by onehitwonder on Sept 26, 2016 9:13:17 GMT -5
I am so so sorry. My heart is breaking for you and the boys. I am sending you so much peace and strength to get you through this nightmare. I wish I could do more.
I have been thinking about you nonstop and my heart is just broken for you. I know words cannot make this better. But each and every one of us is here for you. All my love and prayers go out to you and your sweet boys.
Post by thedahliharpa on Sept 26, 2016 9:53:42 GMT -5
You don't have to do anything right now except keep loving A & J. Let the people who want to help, help. Or, if it's too much tell them to get out and try and again later. I'm so sorry you are in pain.
I'm so sorry. I wish our words and thoughts could make everything right in your world again. I've been thinking of you and praying for you and the boys each time I do.
praying for you. Praying for your boys. there are no words but know that we love you and are thinking of/praying for you. Please continue to let us know if we can help in any way at all. Everyone who said to ignore the phone if you aren't ready is completely right. You can feel and do whatever you need to in order to try and process this. I'm so glad you have family around and please remember you also have us when it feels like others aren't available or it's too painful to say the words out loud but you want to share, vent, grieve, remember-- we're here.