So DS#1 is living with a lovely woman for over a year, and it sounds like things are getting serious. I'm kind of new to the gift giving thing for a committed couple (it's been almost 10 years since GD's mom passed away), so I thought I'd ask you guys this question: what do your parents/ILs send the two of you (not counting the kids) for Christmas? Do you receive $$? A large gift for the two of you? Separate gifts?
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Post by goldengirlz on Nov 13, 2017 23:20:25 GMT -5
Some years we receive money, other years it’s something for the house (wine glasses, picture frames, etc.) Other things you could consider would be a gift certificate to a restaurant or tickets to a show/sporting event (if you know their interests.)
Post by newnamesameperson on Nov 13, 2017 23:24:24 GMT -5
ILs - Checks (for each of us) + plus family stockings Parents - Gift (for me, they'd prefer to give a check but we've come to an agreement that I'd like a gift...which means now instead of a check I just pick out my gift..whatever, not exactly what I had planned on occurring) + Gift Card for H
Post by Leeham Rimes on Nov 13, 2017 23:33:39 GMT -5
Sometimes separate, sometimes a joint gift, it depends on my mom's mood. Sometimes if we need something expensive for the house, we get it as a Christmas present. One year was a Dyson vacuum, another year a kitchen table. Last year we got 4 tickets to Disney for each of us, that was super nice.
From Brent's mom we used to get NASCAR tickets, which Brent was into, I was not but I don't mind going to live events for the snacks, lol.
I need ham like water Like breath, like rain I need ham like mercy From Heaven's gate Sometimes ham salad or casserole or ham that’s free range, all natural I need ham
My mom gives us seperate gifts, which I prefer. My ILs do whatever they feel like from year to year (we have a strained relationship).
I think that at this stage I would give seperate gifts unless your son asks for a joint gift like dishes, vacuum, tickets to an event, etc. For me, it would feel more special to have my SO's mom recognize me as an individual and not as an extension of my SO
share.memebox.com/x/uKhKaZmemebox referal code for 20% off! DD1 "J" born 3/2003 DD2 "G" born 4/2011 DS is here! "H" born 2/2014 m/c#3 1-13-13 @ 9 weeks m/c#2 11-11-12 @ 5w2d I am an extended breastfeeding, cloth diapering, baby wearing, pro marriage equality, birth control lovin', Catholic mama.
ILs give us gift cards. Usually for southwest because we live a plane ride away and fly often.
My parents do a couple small individually wrapped gifts for each of us cause my mom knows I like to unwrap presents and have presents under the tree. Usually one item of clothing, one or two other tangible items (cute necklace or home decor item for me, tool or bar glasses for H), and some candy.
Post by Captain Catnip on Nov 14, 2017 6:45:29 GMT -5
separate gifts from his family, small separate and one large joint gift and/or money from mine. Usually the joint gift is something for the house, a new grill, a new smoker, or one year we got an airbnb gift card.
Post by wildfloweragain on Nov 14, 2017 7:14:04 GMT -5
separate gifts. My mom gives me personal things or things I wouldn't spend money on for myself- new towels, massage gc, massage pillow, jewelry. For H it is usually something related to tools/the barn or firefighting and it is something he has to specifically lead us to. or a gift card to something HE likes.
MIL used to also do separate gifts. Something from H's list for him, a few things that she gives every year, like a specific calendar, and she did themed things for me. Sometimes they were right on and sometimes a bit off the mark but it showed she cared enough to pay attention. One year it was a pizza stone, pizza cookbook, etc. One year it was a bunch of Shirley Temple themed stuff, one year fondue themed stuff, smoothie stuff, etc.
Once we bought a house together/ got married I really appreciated keepsakes, such as special ornaments, historic picture of our house, etc, but that would have wrecked me if we didn't stay together so I would hold off on joint/ meaningful keepsakes until a commitment has been made.
Post by sapphireblue on Nov 14, 2017 7:39:43 GMT -5
Both sets of parents do separate gifts for us. Smallish type stuff like a book and a sweater or something equivalent.
When my exH was around, we sometimes got gifts like that, or occasionally we got a joint gift for the house--like one year they gave us a stepladder, one year a wheelbarrow, etc.
Also, I started giving two gifts back instead of one. I figured if now my parents have to buy a gift for me and another for SO, I needed to double my gifts back.
Post by mccallister84 on Nov 14, 2017 8:14:15 GMT -5
Neither set of parents has much money, and there are a slew of grandkids so the focus at Christmas is on them. We usually get something practical for the house from my parents - last year we got a bundt pan, nice cookie sheets and sili pats and something Colorado related from his parents (that’s where they live - we live a plane ride away). Last year it was a throw designed to look like the Colorado flag. TBH I’m kind of done with my house getting “Colorado-ified”.
SIL and BIL usually give a gift for us both, like Harry and David or Omaha Steaks box. I like that. My brother and his wife usually give a board game or gift certificate to a restaurant for us to share, which is also nice.
MIL shops on QVC in the middle of the night exclusively, so I usually end up with really *interesting* things that I would never, ever use or wear and DH ends up with nothing- think lime green wool jacket in the wrong size, orthopedic shoes, or religious holiday decorations. I end up donating what she gives every year. It's a shame because I know they are not doing well financially, but she won't stop buying these things.
My MIL has given us a gift card the last couple years. Once to whole foods, another to a local farm that sells meat & vegetables. It's been really useful
We generally get a combination of individual gifts, joint gifts, and money.
My favorite is when we indicate that we need/want something for our household and my IL's give us cash with a picture attached so that we know the money is earmarked for that particular item. I like practical gifts.
Gift cards for a restaurant or weekend away, or things for the house (we got a nice toaster oven last year). Also framed pictures or other house decorations. We'd also like ski passes or things like that.
My IL give everyone small thoughtful gifts. My parents usually get us something bigger to “share” or something I will use with the family. In the past we have gotten iPad, camera, ski trip, etc. and they always give us the best gift - offering to babysit overnight so we can go out.
Separate things from our Amazon wishlists. However, for both sisters and their husbands we do small gifts and then a restaurant gift card to places they love so they can treat themselves to a night out.
Post by definitelyO on Nov 14, 2017 10:45:58 GMT -5
we usually get separate gifts. sometimes joint. small joint gifts like a tree ornament. larger joint gifts like cooking classes. otherwise they're individual.
"He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion." - Unknown