Ugh, sorry. I dealt with that on Monday. Woke up at 2:30 and never fell back asleep.
I want so badly just to reset my alarm and go back to sleep, but I can’t do that. My boss is in town, so I need to be at work on time-ish. I hope he brings breakfast burritos today. He usually does when he’s here.
I think I need to start enforcing a bedtime for myself. I’m always so tired and then perk up in the evenings. I went to bed after 10 last night which is so dumb because I was thinking about going upstairs at 8:30. I don’t know why I do this to myself.
Post by W.T.Faulkner on Mar 21, 2019 6:26:00 GMT -5
Insomnia is the fucking worst. I’m sorry.
Yesterday and the day before, somebody left both a jewelry box and a jar of personal, sentimental objects — funeral Mass cards, feathers, coins, glass things, etc — at our front door. There’s nothing identifying in them. We don’t know where they’re coming from but we’re thinking that maybe someone with dementia is leaving them, which is making me sad. I’m going to take them to the police station on Saturday. I’m not sure what else to do.
W.T.Faulkner, that is so strange and random. You'll have to keep us updated on that one.
My bonus check hit my account today which is great, except they tax the crap out of it, so that sucks. And now I have to do grown up things with it, like put in new curbs. Woo hoo! I'm such a rebel LOL
My bonus check hit my account today which is great, except they tax the crap out of it, so that sucks. And now I have to do grown up things with it, like put in new curbs. Woo hoo! I'm such a rebel LOL
I hear ya! H gets his bonus today and we're using it to fill our oil tank and pay medical bills. Yippee! lol
Post by mrsukyankee on Mar 21, 2019 6:53:45 GMT -5
I woke up far too early but at least I got some stuff done. I'm beginning to pack away things we're not using regularly so that if we do sell our house, it'll be a bit less to do. My MIL is freaking out about it - in her mind it's going away forever. We did have a chat about how it doesn't matter how much one paid for something, if it's not getting use at all or being seen by anyone at all, it doesn't need to remain in the house - but I promised not to sell off everything right now (most likely stuff will have to go as we won't have as big a house or as much storage).
It's also the anniversary of my FIL's death (4 years ago) and my poor H has just had some bad memories hit him last night and today (he was the one who was doing chest compressions and had his father pretty much die on him in the hallway of our current house - one reason why we'd like to sell). Going out for dosa to celebrate his memory.
We don’t invite people over to our house much because since I work from home I basically have turned our dining room into a photography studio/office for my work. It’s a huge pain to break it all down just for one night unless we are really going all out for a dinner party or something—it all has to go in our unfinished basement.
Our floor plan is pretty open so it’s all right there if I don’t put it in the basement and we wouldn’t have enough places for people to sit (old, small house).
I’m fine with it, we meet people out, we go to their houses whatever. My husband also doesn’t want to invite people over for the same reason but brings it up to every “new” person we meet. It is so annoying.
He even mentions it when we have dinner with his coworkers who are here for like 2 days from Europe. They are not expecting to be invited over! I guess he feels like its weird but he doesn’t want people coming over all the time either so he needs to get over it.
Even when the room was clear we met people out 95% of the time anyway. He makes it sound like we are hoarders or living on an archeological dig, not that two of the three first floor rooms are taken up worth my work stuff! I keep telling him to knock it off but he forgets and does it. Do sticker charts work with adults?
I barely slept last night. H and i had another talk, I guess really getting it all out in the open and it was not fun. he is no longer attracted to me. There is just nothing there in the romance type of feelings. And I guess when he first brought it up (though not that clearly) a year or so ago I guess he was hoping I would suggest counseling again. I thought i had at some point, but whatever. What's done is done and he feels how he feels and that is that. It just really sucks. And maybe there is a part of me that felt the same way, though I still think he is really good looking, but I think I would have just kept going because i think it is more than just sex.
Sorry rambling. I have to teach my class today and have no clue how I will do that well. i had been planning to create a new ride for today, but that never happened, so I will do an old one. I hope the people in my class will understand. ANd I hope I won't cry.
(( cleo29)) I'm so sorry Cleo, that had to be hard to hear. If you don't mind my saying...I think his saying he hoped you had suggested counseling is total BS on his part. What was stopping him from suggesting it? Why is it on you? It's not.
Post by notoriousmeg on Mar 21, 2019 7:27:58 GMT -5
I’m sorry cleo29. I agree with jreeds though. What he’s doing now is unfair. He could have suggested counseling. I also think saying things like he’s no longer attracted to you is just mean now. From what you have said the decision to separate has been made. There really is no need to make you feel worse.
It’s pouring rain and my allergies are awful. I want to stay in bed all day, but I am on a bus that is about 90 degrees andd humid. At least it’s almost Friday.
I got a pedicure for the first time in my life last night. It was so amazing. Now to work regular pedicures into my budget...
Today is my Friday, then we leave for the beach! I'm totally checked out at work and definitely need this break.
ETA: Hugs cleo29. I agree that him saying that to you was a dick move. His phone could have called the therapist just as easily as yours. Please be kind to yourself.
I’m sorry cleo29 . I agree with jreeds though. What he’s doing now is unfair. He could have suggested counseling. I also think saying things like he’s no longer attracted to you is just mean now. From what you have said the decision to separate has been made. There really is no need to make you feel worse.
It’s pouring rain and my allergies are awful. I want to stay in bed all day, but I am on a bus that is about 90 degrees andd humid. At least it’s almost Friday.
I had asked and brought it up. maybe it is good, in some way, because it makes it very clear that things are truly done.
jreeds, thanks for the kind words. we actually ended the conversation in a good place. Doesn't mean i am not hurting, but it ended well.
With my history, sex can be tricky. I just wish it weren't so damn important.
cleo29 I'm sorry this is so hard. I agree your STBX is not being very fair. He could have been proactive if he thought there was a problem. And "I'm not attracted to you anymore" is dumb. I hate hate hate when that is said to women because we tend to blame that on appearance, when really I think it just means he's not feeling connected anymore (which entirely separate from plain old attraction IMO). I hope you don't take that too much to heart. It sounds like your relationship has had a lot of issues that both of you contributed to so it's not that something is wrong with YOU, at all. I remember when I split from my XH I worried that I was the problem and that I was never going to find someone new because I was bad at relationships, unattractive, etc. Then I met my current H and realized that I'm pretty damn good at a relationship when I'm with someone who is actually compatible with me. If the relationship/marriage is not right, there is nothing you or I can do to make it so.
tacokick FWIW I thought the reason you don't invite people over sounded perfectly reasonable and didn't give me an impression that you were hoarders at all Though I also agree no explanation is even necessary!
My random - my H ordered a new laptop, and he got a message yesterday that it was delivered and "left at the front door". Well, we live in a secure building on a street that gets heavy foot traffic, and where I'd be surprised if it lasted 5 minutes without being stolen, given our neighborhood. I told him I highly doubt that that was actually where it was left, and that that's probably just a standard delivery message. Well, the package wasn't in our building when we got home, so who knows! I assume it was just marked as delivered but will actually show up today. We've had a lot of issues with things getting delivered since we moved, since our building doesn't have an office with regular hours or a doorman or anything, so there is often nobody there to let deliveries in. The idea of leaving a package in front of our building is cracking me up though. My H almost never orders anything online so this whole thing is new to him. I have gotten sort of used to it already since I order stuff all the time, but it's usually nothing expensive.
Post by maudefindlay on Mar 21, 2019 7:47:38 GMT -5
cleo29 The people in your class will think nothing of a repeat ride, they just want a good workout.
Yesterday was a great beach day. Today and tomorrow should be as well. We will likely head home on Saturday, then full schedule of activities start back up. I coach my boys' running club with 2x wk practices starting next week. They are a great group, but lots of boy humor....cue jokes re bodily functions.
Post by lovelyshoes on Mar 21, 2019 7:52:09 GMT -5
I am sorry cleo29 that’s not right. If he wanted something it was on Him to suggest/initiate. Also, what’s the point of saying that besides being hurtful? That’s just wrong I’m so many levels. Not that it’s an excuse, but it was a full moon last night and I was reading about it and it’s supposedly be one of those that really makes you emotional and realize what you want from life. Take care of you. You deserve it and it will be better for you and your girls.
This morning was rough. I traveled for work Sun-Wed with completely packed days and DH is gone Wed-Fri, so I had a long day yesterday with travel back and then all the regular kid/house stuff when I got home, and then this morning had to finish getting the house ready for the cleaners, get the kids and the dog dropped off, and then get to the office in the rain through a construction zone. Nothing terrible, just death by a thousand paper cuts. I'm exhausted and it's only 9am.
It's a good thing I don't have anything terrible important to do in the office today.
I’m sorry cleo29 . I agree with jreeds though. What he’s doing now is unfair. He could have suggested counseling. I also think saying things like he’s no longer attracted to you is just mean now. From what you have said the decision to separate has been made. There really is no need to make you feel worse.
It’s pouring rain and my allergies are awful. I want to stay in bed all day, but I am on a bus that is about 90 degrees andd humid. At least it’s almost Friday.
With my history, sex can be tricky. I just wish it weren't so damn important.
I agree with this. I have my own issues with sex, largely since having kids. It's been a huge source of contention between H and I. I'm working on it, and he's working on trying not to take it personally.
I reached out to my doctor this morning to see about getting testing for adult ADD. I'm 90% sure I have it and I'm really tired of struggling. I'm worried he's going to roll his eyes at me or something though, which is why I haven't asked about it before now. But I have so much anxiety that I think stems from how I deal with it and I need to fix that.
PSA: Always compare your medical bills back to the Explanation of Benefits from your insurance. This is the 3rd bill I've received in 4 months that has been for substantially more than my EOB says. Doctors office explanation is always "you're right. we credited your account wrong."
tacokick FWIW I thought the reason you don't invite people over sounded perfectly reasonable and didn't give me an impression that you were hoarders at all Though I also agree no explanation is even necessary!
My random - my H ordered a new laptop, and he got a message yesterday that it was delivered and "left at the front door". Well, we live in a secure building on a street that gets heavy foot traffic, and where I'd be surprised if it lasted 5 minutes without being stolen, given our neighborhood. I told him I highly doubt that that was actually where it was left, and that that's probably just a standard delivery message. Well, the package wasn't in our building when we got home, so who knows! I assume it was just marked as delivered but will actually show up today. We've had a lot of issues with things getting delivered since we moved, since our building doesn't have an office with regular hours or a doorman or anything, so there is often nobody there to let deliveries in. The idea of leaving a package in front of our building is cracking me up though. My H almost never orders anything online so this whole thing is new to him. I have gotten sort of used to it already since I order stuff all the time, but it's usually nothing expensive.
Thanks! It isn’t huge deal but it gets on my nerves. Your coworkers from London just want to work, eat some crabs and go home, they don’t want to hang out at our house anyway! Stop bringing it up!
I hope the laptop is there when you get home to day! I can’t imagine them leaving it at the door of your apartment building but I guess its possible. Next time, see if it can be delivered to one of those delivery lockers. You can have fedex deliver to Walgreens and UPS has lockers.
tacokick FWIW I thought the reason you don't invite people over sounded perfectly reasonable and didn't give me an impression that you were hoarders at all Though I also agree no explanation is even necessary!
My random - my H ordered a new laptop, and he got a message yesterday that it was delivered and "left at the front door". Well, we live in a secure building on a street that gets heavy foot traffic, and where I'd be surprised if it lasted 5 minutes without being stolen, given our neighborhood. I told him I highly doubt that that was actually where it was left, and that that's probably just a standard delivery message. Well, the package wasn't in our building when we got home, so who knows! I assume it was just marked as delivered but will actually show up today. We've had a lot of issues with things getting delivered since we moved, since our building doesn't have an office with regular hours or a doorman or anything, so there is often nobody there to let deliveries in. The idea of leaving a package in front of our building is cracking me up though. My H almost never orders anything online so this whole thing is new to him. I have gotten sort of used to it already since I order stuff all the time, but it's usually nothing expensive.
Thanks! It isn’t huge deal but it gets on my nerves. Your coworkers from London just want to work, eat some crabs and go home, they don’t want to hang out at our house anyway! Stop bringing it up!
I hope the laptop is there when you get home to day! I can’t imagine them leaving it at the door of your apartment building but I guess its possible. Next time, see if it can be delivered to one of those delivery lockers. You can have fedex deliver to Walgreens and UPS has lockers.
Yeah, I wish we had thought ahead on that! There is a FedEx store like 2 blocks from our house so we should have just had it sent there. I'm sure it will show up today.
9pm Monday: everything’s fine 11pm Monday: DH is throwing up
He stayed home from work on Tuesday.
We both worked half days on Wednesday because we were taking a road trip Wednesday-Sunday. An hour into our drive, our engine started shaking, we lost power, and barely made it to an off-ramp and got towed back to town.
Because we were going to be gone, we took our other car into the shop for minor work. So we are car-less. I’m staying home today bc I have plenty of vacation time and plenty that I can do around here, but DH is getting a ride to and from work today. Hoping the second car will be done today so that we’ll have one. The other one? DH thinks it’s a total engine failure. I’m just glad we were only an hour away and not halfway into our trip in the middle of nowhere familiar!
PSA: Always compare your medical bills back to the Explanation of Benefits from your insurance. This is the 3rd bill I've received in 4 months that has been for substantially more than my EOB says. Doctors office explanation is always "you're right. we credited your account wrong."
Totally agree on this PSA. I've been fighting a hospital bill for 6 months because they tried to charge me 1k more than my insurance states they are allowed to.
PSA: Always compare your medical bills back to the Explanation of Benefits from your insurance. This is the 3rd bill I've received in 4 months that has been for substantially more than my EOB says. Doctors office explanation is always "you're right. we credited your account wrong."
Totally agree on this PSA. I've been fighting a hospital bill for 6 months because they tried to charge me 1k more than my insurance states they are allowed to.
It's ridiculous. And I'm an accountant so I know mistakes happen, but this is from several different doctors offices too. I am sure most people just pay them and move on too. Or let them go overdue and then owe even more.
Totally agree on this PSA. I've been fighting a hospital bill for 6 months because they tried to charge me 1k more than my insurance states they are allowed to.
It's ridiculous. And I'm an accountant so I know mistakes happen, but this is from several different doctors offices too. I am sure most people just pay them and move on too. Or let them go overdue and then owe even more.
I work for an insurance company, lol. And yes, I'm sure a lot of people don't even think to check. The healthcare system is definitely...interesting.
(( cleo29 )) I'm so sorry Cleo, that had to be hard to hear. If you don't mind my saying...I think his saying he hoped you had suggested counseling is total BS on his part. What was stopping him from suggesting it? Why is it on you? It's not.
This, right here. I'm really sorry, cleo29. I'm sure your class will understand, and I'm glad you're going; hopefully, it will be a bit of a diversion.
Apparently two people in my division got into a shouting match this morning when I was gone. WTF, you're grown ass adults. One woman doesn't work for me, but she is the admin, so she sits with us. I don't get why people can't just do their jobs, stay in their lane, and go home.