beerlover I'm so sorry he is sick. Men can get post part depression too so I would encourage him to reach out to his doctor &/or Postpartum Support International (they have groups for men).
Yes! You’d see some signs, and at some point likely hear them running. SHUDDERS
Ok, nothing like running. Just weird water dripping type pops in a place with no water. Which brings me full circle, and why the hell is there weird water dripping noises in my attic?!
Is it possible it's your air ducts? Sometimes we hear popping type noises and they're sort of hard to locate. I did finally figure that it's just the heating/cooling in our air ducts and it's intermittent. HVAC company said it's a total non-issue aside from being annoying.
Next time it happens, go put your ear right up next to the closest air vent in the room.
Ok douche, go ahead and call it mud. My husband DID have halitosis. We addressed it after I talked to you girls on here and guess what? Years later, no problem. Mofongo, you're a cunt. Eat shit. ~anonnamus
I got a romper- I'm calling it my squirrel suit, and I am beyond thrilled to be wearing it today. I don't care that I look like Danny DeVito as the Penguin. IT. HAS. POCKETS.
Not to be condescending, but why don't your parents just go out there? I've wondered this for awhile. She doesn't have a partner, she's relatively new to the area... it's time for some intervention. This situation sounds dangerous and I feel like she's probably not thinking super clearly at this point.
They've gone back and forth so much. She has just been SO insistent that she doesn't want them there - and not "oh I don't want to inconvenience you" but more of a "I am going to be so upset and stressed out by you coming so if you do you'll make things worse". My mom has bought a plane ticket probably at least 5 times by now and then cancelled when my sister got upset that she was planning to come.
My sister has a long history of being very forceful about having her space and boundaries. I have never understood it - she is close with my parents, has gone on vacation with them, talks to my mom daily, etc so it's not like she doesn't like or trust them. But she has a personality that if we don't do what she wants, she turns into a real snappy jerk. I love her but she can be really difficult to deal with.
I don't know, it's so hard. To some extent maybe they should just go out there anyway and if she's mad, she's mad and will just have to deal with it? I don't know.
I'm sure it's really hard and I get the conflict, but... they're talking about giving her a feeding tube. Like, this isn't some minor ongoing issue.
I don't know. Maybe I'm way off base, but it just seems like she needs a support system. Could your mom get a hotel or short-term rental and just say "hey, I'm not going to be in your hair, I just want to attend the doctor appointments and otherwise you won't see me unless you want to."
If it has stairs that go up and down immediately upon entry to the house it's called a split level by everyone I know in my state (WA). My H grew up in a split level and loves them. I grew up in one level houses (not even a basement) and hate having to go up & down stairs all the time.
By me, that's a raised ranch. I live in one, too. There are two levels of full-length of the house living spaces (usually kitchen, dining, bedrooms, and living room on the upper level, and family room, office or bedroom, laundry room, and sometimes other rooms on the lower level. There is no basement, but the lower level is half way below grade.
The split levels by me have at least three levels (top is bedrooms, middle is living/dining, and kitchen, and bottom is a family room and laundry room). Splits have a basement and the bottom level is at grade.
We live in a split level (called a tri-level locally) and it's exactly as you describe. We also have a basement though that is below grade, so four levels total. The bottom level (family room/laundry room) is at grade.
Post by gretchenindisguise on Apr 12, 2023 20:31:59 GMT -5
I feel bad for A.
He is allergic to sunflower seeds, and 99% of the time, it’s a super easy allergy to deal with. But last week on vacation, he chose seedy bread at dinner - and I had to intervene and say no. Then tonight, as I was preparing the hamburger buns, I was re-checking to make sure I can eat them (dairy/egg allergy often shows up in breads) and I realized these buns had sunflower flour in them. I’ve never seen that in a bun before.
Ok, nothing like running. Just weird water dripping type pops in a place with no water. Which brings me full circle, and why the hell is there weird water dripping noises in my attic?!
Is it possible it's your air ducts? Sometimes we hear popping type noises and they're sort of hard to locate. I did finally figure that it's just the heating/cooling in our air ducts and it's intermittent. HVAC company said it's a total non-issue aside from being annoying.
Next time it happens, go put your ear right up next to the closest air vent in the room.
Oh, I’ve been through everything logical and some illogical (ghosts). There is literally nothing in that area. No wires, no ducts (all from the basement). And actually, it’s a vaulted ceiling so the “attic” above it is like 3-7 inches. Husband is an electrician, so we’ve confirmed it’s not electrical. Apparently, there is an insect, but it seems to be a European, or British isles thing, and I can’t find it again. I think we’ve arrived at its some sort of house cooling, humidity thing. It hasn’t happened tonight, but last night, there were two espidoes.
By me, that's a raised ranch. I live in one, too. There are two levels of full-length of the house living spaces (usually kitchen, dining, bedrooms, and living room on the upper level, and family room, office or bedroom, laundry room, and sometimes other rooms on the lower level. There is no basement, but the lower level is half way below grade.
The split levels by me have at least three levels (top is bedrooms, middle is living/dining, and kitchen, and bottom is a family room and laundry room). Splits have a basement and the bottom level is at grade.
We live in a split level (called a tri-level locally) and it's exactly as you describe. We also have a basement though that is below grade, so four levels total. The bottom level (family room/laundry room) is at grade.
I’ve always hear the first, where you come in and the foyer has stairs only, called a split foyer. Raised ranch being something where it’s a straight staircase up, rather than one with a landing. And then, a split level being 3 (or more) half house levels staggered. My first boyfriend lived in one that was like 5 levels. It went on and on and on and on. Best part, the basement had shag carpet, and thick stamped/cottage cheese ceiling (the star shaped stamps) that hung like stalagtites, and glitter mixed in. Oooooh those 70s houses.
I got a romper- I'm calling it my squirrel suit, and I am beyond thrilled to be wearing it today. I don't care that I look like Danny DeVito as the Penguin. IT. HAS. POCKETS.
If it has stairs that go up and down immediately upon entry to the house it's called a split level by everyone I know in my state (WA). My H grew up in a split level and loves them. I grew up in one level houses (not even a basement) and hate having to go up & down stairs all the time.
By me, that's a raised ranch. I live in one, too. There are two levels of full-length of the house living spaces (usually kitchen, dining, bedrooms, and living room on the upper level, and family room, office or bedroom, laundry room, and sometimes other rooms on the lower level. There is no basement, but the lower level is half way below grade.
The split levels by me have at least three levels (top is bedrooms, middle is living/dining, and kitchen, and bottom is a family room and laundry room). Splits have a basement and the bottom level is at grade.
Are there are realtors here to settle this 😉
I quoted you because that's what I call a split level as well (or multi-level or tri-level). Though the split level we moved from last summer had a 4th level below ground, situated under the living room.
I've always referred to "raised ranch" in the post as a split-entry. I'm western PA so apparently different than other locals on previous page
They've gone back and forth so much. She has just been SO insistent that she doesn't want them there - and not "oh I don't want to inconvenience you" but more of a "I am going to be so upset and stressed out by you coming so if you do you'll make things worse". My mom has bought a plane ticket probably at least 5 times by now and then cancelled when my sister got upset that she was planning to come.
My sister has a long history of being very forceful about having her space and boundaries. I have never understood it - she is close with my parents, has gone on vacation with them, talks to my mom daily, etc so it's not like she doesn't like or trust them. But she has a personality that if we don't do what she wants, she turns into a real snappy jerk. I love her but she can be really difficult to deal with.
I don't know, it's so hard. To some extent maybe they should just go out there anyway and if she's mad, she's mad and will just have to deal with it? I don't know.
I'm sure it's really hard and I get the conflict, but... they're talking about giving her a feeding tube. Like, this isn't some minor ongoing issue.
I don't know. Maybe I'm way off base, but it just seems like she needs a support system. Could your mom get a hotel or short-term rental and just say "hey, I'm not going to be in your hair, I just want to attend the doctor appointments and otherwise you won't see me unless you want to."
I don't think you're off base, and my mom has talked about that too. I guess we will see if some progress is made tomorrow at her appointment and go from there. Her male friend (who is the husband of her female friend, not a love interest) is going with her tomorrow so maybe they will do something with a man there to push them? Such an awful concept but maybe it will help.
We all agree it is pretty serious and dire at this point.
wildrice - I’m sorry, that’s so scary! Do they know what caused it? Was she ever diagnosed with an underlying issue? I think she did have her gallbladder out, I know sometimes surgery itself can be a cause.
Ok douche, go ahead and call it mud. My husband DID have halitosis. We addressed it after I talked to you girls on here and guess what? Years later, no problem. Mofongo, you're a cunt. Eat shit. ~anonnamus
I'm sure it's really hard and I get the conflict, but... they're talking about giving her a feeding tube. Like, this isn't some minor ongoing issue.
I don't know. Maybe I'm way off base, but it just seems like she needs a support system. Could your mom get a hotel or short-term rental and just say "hey, I'm not going to be in your hair, I just want to attend the doctor appointments and otherwise you won't see me unless you want to."
I don't think you're off base, and my mom has talked about that too. I guess we will see if some progress is made tomorrow at her appointment and go from there. Her male friend (who is the husband of her female friend, not a love interest) is going with her tomorrow so maybe they will do something with a man there to push them? Such an awful concept but maybe it will help.
We all agree it is pretty serious and dire at this point.
I’m sorry she is still dealing with this. It sounds horrible.
Is it possible there is something else going on that she just doesn’t want your parents/you and your sister to know about? It seems like an extreme stance to take when you are this sick and you aren’t estranged but then to be fine with friends and employers knowing intimate health info about you.
This must be so difficult for all of you guys to watch from afar but I can understand why you wouldn’t want to ambush her either.
I'm sure it's really hard and I get the conflict, but... they're talking about giving her a feeding tube. Like, this isn't some minor ongoing issue.
I don't know. Maybe I'm way off base, but it just seems like she needs a support system. Could your mom get a hotel or short-term rental and just say "hey, I'm not going to be in your hair, I just want to attend the doctor appointments and otherwise you won't see me unless you want to."
I don't think you're off base, and my mom has talked about that too. I guess we will see if some progress is made tomorrow at her appointment and go from there. Her male friend (who is the husband of her female friend, not a love interest) is going with her tomorrow so maybe they will do something with a man there to push them? Such an awful concept but maybe it will help.
We all agree it is pretty serious and dire at this point.
Aren’t those people, or at least one of them, her bosses? Weren’t your concerned before about the nature of their relationship? Maybe I’m misremembering, but I am pretty sure that’s what you’d said. If that’s the case, I do wonder what’s going on that she’s hiding, and I’d risk her being mad to get to the bottom of some things.
IMO the hallmark of a split level is there is a left and right half of the house. The stairs are in the middle and each side is half a flight of stairs offset from the other. My grandparents had a house like this. Entry on the right side at ground level with a family room and another room. Half a flight down to the left was a garage. Half a flight up to the left was the kitchen and dining room. Half a flight up to the right were bedrooms.
A raised ranch has only two floors and they are a full flight of stairs apart. The top floor typically combines kitchen/dining and bedrooms. Lower floor is typically living space.
If it has stairs that go up and down immediately upon entry to the house it's called a split level by everyone I know in my state (WA). My H grew up in a split level and loves them. I grew up in one level houses (not even a basement) and hate having to go up & down stairs all the time.
By me, that's a raised ranch. I live in one, too. There are two levels of full-length of the house living spaces (usually kitchen, dining, bedrooms, and living room on the upper level, and family room, office or bedroom, laundry room, and sometimes other rooms on the lower level. There is no basement, but the lower level is half way below grade.
The split levels by me have at least three levels (top is bedrooms, middle is living/dining, and kitchen, and bottom is a family room and laundry room). Splits have a basement and the bottom level is at grade.
By me, that's a raised ranch. I live in one, too. There are two levels of full-length of the house living spaces (usually kitchen, dining, bedrooms, and living room on the upper level, and family room, office or bedroom, laundry room, and sometimes other rooms on the lower level. There is no basement, but the lower level is half way below grade.
The split levels by me have at least three levels (top is bedrooms, middle is living/dining, and kitchen, and bottom is a family room and laundry room). Splits have a basement and the bottom level is at grade.
Edit - basement is below grade.
In my area we call those tri levels. #regional
It's so funny to me that this is regional! We use bi-level and tri-level. In all 3 house buying endeavors I've never seen split level or raised ranch used. The bi-level we lived in was for sure called that in the listing when we bought and when we sold.
In ours if you came in the front door there were 5 steps going up and 5 steps going down. The lower level was about 1/2 under ground. If you came in the back door (which is what we did) it was one long flight up to the upper level.
wildrice - I’m sorry, that’s so scary! Do they know what caused it? Was she ever diagnosed with an underlying issue? I think she did have her gallbladder out, I know sometimes surgery itself can be a cause.
Not necessarily, but it could be a number of things. Her bad gallbladder was not removed for over 3 months after it started acting up, so that seems to have triggered it - the vomiting started before it came out, but a couple of months after the pain started. She also has an eating disorder - she has been "in recovery" for a number of years but frankly I've never believed it - she always binge eats when she's with our family but she's very thin so it doesn't add up that she can eat several plates of food in one sitting and still be a size 0 (bulimia was her main issue). I want to believe that that's not her norm and it's just something she engages in when she's in a stressful situation like traveling, but it is impossible to know. Even if she IS recovered, it's possible her system was damaged from the time she was actively engaging.
I don't think you're off base, and my mom has talked about that too. I guess we will see if some progress is made tomorrow at her appointment and go from there. Her male friend (who is the husband of her female friend, not a love interest) is going with her tomorrow so maybe they will do something with a man there to push them? Such an awful concept but maybe it will help.
We all agree it is pretty serious and dire at this point.
Aren’t those people, or at least one of them, her bosses? Weren’t your concerned before about the nature of their relationship? Maybe I’m misremembering, but I am pretty sure that’s what you’d said. If that’s the case, I do wonder what’s going on that she’s hiding, and I’d risk her being mad to get to the bottom of some things.
Yup - the man is her boss. I think it's weird AF but I AM glad that she at least has someone who is there and can advocate for her, even if it's not who I would have chosen for her.
A strange twist to this is that his wife, her new BFF, has long COVID and ALSO somehow ended up with gastroparesis and a feeding tube. Hers started months before my sister's, so my first question was "is this environmental?" since she's been hanging out at their house so much. But I don't think that's a normal source of gastroparesis so it's probably just a very weird coincidence. At the very least, this means her friends are well versed in figuring out treatment and hopefully the things they have learned through the friend's diagnosis can help my sister.
I don't really think anything nefarious is going on but I guess it is possible she is hiding something from all of us, tacokick. I feel like I don't actually know her very well because she's always been someone who wants to be loved at arms length. I think a lot of it stems from some trauma she had as a teenager that led to her mental health problems. I thought she had figured out good treatment for her anxiety in recent years, but I think that's the source of a lot of things too. It makes me really sad for what her life and relationships could have been if what happened to her had never happened.
Aren’t those people, or at least one of them, her bosses? Weren’t your concerned before about the nature of their relationship? Maybe I’m misremembering, but I am pretty sure that’s what you’d said. If that’s the case, I do wonder what’s going on that she’s hiding, and I’d risk her being mad to get to the bottom of some things.
PDQ I guess because that's a lot.
Complete outsider's view: this is a crazy coincidence and kind of feels like a red flag to me. Is it possible he's poisoning her? I probably watch too much TV, but what are the chances that this would happen to 2 women he's close with? I know it is complicated, but I feel like someone in your family needs to get out there ASAP and figure out what is going on. Has anyone in your family met these people to confirm they aren't crazy?
Complete outsider's view: this is a crazy coincidence and kind of feels like a red flag to me. Is it possible he's poisoning her? I probably watch too much TV, but what are the chances that this would happen to 2 women he's close with? I know it is complicated, but I feel like someone in your family needs to get out there ASAP and figure out what is going on. Has anyone in your family met these people to confirm they aren't crazy?
Sorry, deleted the quote.
I honestly don't know - I am not one to jump to worst case scenario on stuff, but it did cross my mind that something completely insane like that could be going on. Gastroparesis is not common and truly what are the chances? But at the same time I think it is still more likely to be a coincidence. Though I am always suspicious of adult relationships where people get super close super fast... and especially a married couple with children. The last thing I want in my marriage is one of my friends just hanging out with me and my H all the time and being at our house constantly. I would love to have some deeper friendships in my life but I see absolutely nothing appealing about that situation!
I think my parents met them when they went out to visit sometime last year if I'm not remembering incorrectly.
wildrice - I was wondering about an eating disorder, but I’d already asked so many questions! It’s def common with gastroperesis. I’m sorry, what a difficult and scary situation.
Ok douche, go ahead and call it mud. My husband DID have halitosis. We addressed it after I talked to you girls on here and guess what? Years later, no problem. Mofongo, you're a cunt. Eat shit. ~anonnamus
Complete outsider's view: this is a crazy coincidence and kind of feels like a red flag to me. Is it possible he's poisoning her? I probably watch too much TV, but what are the chances that this would happen to 2 women he's close with? I know it is complicated, but I feel like someone in your family needs to get out there ASAP and figure out what is going on. Has anyone in your family met these people to confirm they aren't crazy?
Sorry, deleted the quote.
My thoughts went to straight up Dateline episode too!
wildrice I kind of wondered if they were in a throuple and she didn’t want you guys to know.
That is a wild coincidence with the wife. Could they be really into “wellness” or something and taking supplements or eating weird food/diet that is messing up their stomach? I remember when people were deliberately drinking swamp water and pond water to fix their “biomes” and that made the news a few years ago. People do some wacky stuff.
wildrice I kind of wondered if they were in a throuple and she didn’t want you guys to know.
That is a wild coincidence with the wife. Could they be really into “wellness” or something and taking supplements or eating weird food/diet that is messing up their stomach? I remember when people were deliberately drinking swamp water and pond water to fix their “biomes” and that made the news a few years ago. People do some wacky stuff.
I don't know! She denies the throuple thing, and I think I believe her because she's someone who is pretty dedicated to being single - She doesn't date, doesn't want to get married, doesn't want any kind of romantic relationship ever. So for her to go from zero to two partners would be really something. Also, of course there is always fear of judgement for that kind of thing but my family is honestly pretty progressive on things and I am sure we'd be supportive even if it was a "weird" concept at first.
The supplement thing is a good question. I can't imagine she wouldn't have considered that by now if it was an ongoing thing, but it's possible they had been doing supplements of some kind that started all of this?
wildrice I kind of wondered if they were in a throuple and she didn’t want you guys to know.
That is a wild coincidence with the wife. Could they be really into “wellness” or something and taking supplements or eating weird food/diet that is messing up their stomach? I remember when people were deliberately drinking swamp water and pond water to fix their “biomes” and that made the news a few years ago. People do some wacky stuff.
I don't know! She denies the throuple thing, and I think I believe her because she's someone who is pretty dedicated to being single - She doesn't date, doesn't want to get married, doesn't want any kind of romantic relationship ever. So for her to go from zero to two partners would be really something. Also, of course there is always fear of judgement for that kind of thing but my family is honestly pretty progressive on things and I am sure we'd be supportive even if it was a "weird" concept at first.
The supplement thing is a good question. I can't imagine she wouldn't have considered that by now if it was an ongoing thing, but it's possible they had been doing supplements of some kind that started all of this?
You never know what people might not tell you! My brother was weird about telling us he was getting divorced and no one would have cared. They just acted like they were married for like a year when they were actually separated.
But if she’s anti relationship than probably not? It sounds like this couple has big personalities though.
I had a long mysterious gastro issue for a lot of college and my doctor eventually decided it might been triggered by a bad case of food poisoning I had the summer before and that I hadn’t really recovered from it/it triggered an autoimmune response. There is a theory that celiac disease can be triggered by trauma/stress/other illness. The human body does some strange things.