I thought of another one, but it's DD1's experience more than mine. I feel guilty for not knowing better and preventing it from happening.
PDQ
My daughter had the same thing. The pedi told me to do the same, just pull it apart. But she recommended I do it while she was in a warm bath. She was an infant at the time. I had to do it again at 4 years old, I didn't put her in the bath this time. The pedi said it's possible it will fuse together again, but should quit doing that by puberty.
I thought of another one, but it's DD1's experience more than mine. I feel guilty for not knowing better and preventing it from happening.
PDQ
My daughter had the same thing. The pedi told me to do the same, just pull it apart. But she recommended I do it while she was in a warm bath. She was an infant at the time. I had to do it again at 4 years old, I didn't put her in the bath this time. The pedi said it's possible it will fuse together again, but should quit doing that by puberty.
Damn adhesions! DD1 did deal with it, again, and the new pedi had us use an estrogen cream for a bit. There is definitely more than one way to handle it, but I didn't appreciate the doctor making that choice for us.
Post by redheadbaker on May 18, 2023 19:18:24 GMT -5
I doubt this was lawsuit worthy (never looked into it), but I went to a new-to-me general practitioner because I suspected I had a rare endocrine disorder.
He said, without doing any tests, that it was "too rare," and that I didn't have it. When I later went directly to an endocrinologist, they told me I had "textbook [rare endocrine disorder]."
Post by hannahgruen on May 18, 2023 21:13:45 GMT -5
I woke up fron anesthesia right in the middle of a medical procedure. I freaked out and started screaming that I was awake. The anesthesiologist got me under again in record time. When I'm old and can't remember what I had for breakfast, I'll always remember that.
DD2 had a seizure when she was 3. The hospital said it was just a febrile seizure and to just go home, but with my history of epilepsy we took her to a neurologist. The first one we saw was awful. My husband and I went together, and he would only ask my husband questions, even about my history with epilepsy. Then she obviously needed an EEG, so my mom and I took her to that appointment. She was terrified, and they roughly put her in a chair (a big, adult chair) and she started crying hysterically. I asked if she could sit in my lap so I could comfort her and was told no. She was hysterical and squirming everywhere and they were just fighting her. 30 minutes later, they're still fighting her, and the first leads they attached started coming off because she was sweating so much from being hysterical. I put a stop to it and insisted we leave, but 8 years later and it still kills me that I didn't put a stop to it earlier.
We took her to a different practice and they let her sit on my lap, showed her all of the leads and the different colors, had her attach them to a doll, and then did her test, with not one peep out of her. I, on the other hand, cried like a baby later that day because I was so happy it went so well but so disappointed in myself for letting her go through that in the first place.
When I got my Mirena I had to go to an out of network provider. This doctor lectured me on why I should just take the pill, and when I told him that I didn't want to take it he told me that at least it was easy to put an IUD in because I was thin, and obese women are much more difficult. Such a damn creep.
I've had so much medical trauma related to my cancer diagnosis, but one of the worst was when I was in getting an X-Ray for back pain, scared out of my mind that I was going to find out that I had mets, and the tech went on and on telling me about how her best friend died from breast cancer and left her young kids behind.
I had a doctor told me I had thyroid cancer and I needed to make an appointment for thyroid surgery. I don't have thyroid cancer (confirmed by second opinion).
I've had doctors tell me to stop running so much - and for no reason other than I said I was tired. 20-ish miles a week is not too much.
I had a situation that bothers me to this day that I didn't report it. I was so confused I didn't know what to do. I had an endocrinologist who decided to switch his services and no longer take insurance, but wanted to show people that he could be their full service general practitioner. So instead of explaining that and asking if I wanted that, he proceeded to do an annual exam including breast exam on me "free of charge". I was coming in for a thyroid checkup which is generally doing some bloodwork and weight and seeing if my thyroid had changed in size. Not a full on get in a gown situation. I'm still very bothered by it. I never went back.
ETA: I have a few more but they didn't happen to me.
My mom had horrible headaches for a long time. Went to numerous doctors. One told her she was imagining it. Until the day she had a brain aneurysm.
A very good friend of mine was having a lot of pain and difficulty walking. She was told she had fibromyalgia. For years she thought she had that. Took disability from work. Last year, after living with it for 7 years, she had a doctor figure out she had a spine problem. Had spinal surgery and is now good as new. But lost 7 years to this debilitating condition. It's too much. She's been amazingly strong through all of this and I'm ecstatic to see her walking and acting like her old self again.
Post by cattledogkisses on May 19, 2023 9:16:52 GMT -5
At the ripe old age of 26 I had my optometrist tell me that I was developing cataracts, and refer me to an ophthalmologist. I was freaked out, thinking I was going to need cataract surgery in my 20s. The ophthalmologist pretty quickly determined that my eyes were fine, normal, and healthy with no signs of cataracts. I found a new optometrist after that whole thing and I'm still a bit WTF about it.
At the ripe old age of 26 I had my optometrist tell me that I was developing cataracts, and refer me to an ophthalmologist. I was freaked out, thinking I was going to need cataract surgery in my 20s. The ophthalmologist pretty quickly determined that my eyes were fine, normal, and healthy with no signs of cataracts. I found a new optometrist after that whole thing and I'm still a bit WTF about it.
Ok douche, go ahead and call it mud. My husband DID have halitosis. We addressed it after I talked to you girls on here and guess what? Years later, no problem. Mofongo, you're a cunt. Eat shit. ~anonnamus
I went to see a flight doc about feeling extremely fatigued. He started asking me questions and basically decided I had anxiety and prescribed me a medication for it. Both the diagnosis and medication affected my flight status (which he knew because he was a flight doc) and required a waiver, and he didn’t tell me about it.
Same appointment, as he’s asking questions about my life, starts digging into my husband’s mental health diagnosis and starts demanding to know what caused my husband to be depressed (implying that it was a) somehow knowable, and b) my fault). He then writes down several Bible verses and tells me that I need to go read the Bible with my husband and I’ll feel better. I am not Christian.
Spoiler alert: I didn’t have anxiety (later confirmed by a MH professional, and my fatigue was caused by a severe Vitamin D deficiency (diagnosed and treated by a different doctor after I refused to ever see the first one again). I reported his ass to the base inspector general.
Post by maudefindlay on May 19, 2023 10:56:05 GMT -5
basilosaurus I had the same thing, ruptured ovarian cysts and went to the ER and the young resident started prepping me to have my appendix removed when his supervisor came in and said it was a muscle spasm and sent me home in severe pain and nausea. I had another episode a month later, this time I was home from grad school for Thanksgiving break and my Mom took me in and I was properly diagnosed.
At the ripe old age of 26 I had my optometrist tell me that I was developing cataracts, and refer me to an ophthalmologist. I was freaked out, thinking I was going to need cataract surgery in my 20s. The ophthalmologist pretty quickly determined that my eyes were fine, normal, and healthy with no signs of cataracts. I found a new optometrist after that whole thing and I'm still a bit WTF about it.
I’ve had a cataract since early 30s!
I have a friend who was born with cataracts. She had eye surgery as a baby.
Earlier cataracts run in my family on the maternal side (which I inherited). Both my mom & grandma had cataracts surgery right around 60 (instead of the normal 70s). Based on my eyes I too will most likely be in the same spot in roughly 20 years.
I have a friend who was born with cataracts. She had eye surgery as a baby.
Earlier cataracts run in my family on the maternal side (which I inherited). Both my mom & grandma had cataracts surgery right around 60 (instead of the normal 70s). Based on my eyes I too will most likely be in the same spot in roughly 20 years.
Yeah it is noticeable for me now. I’m 45, so likely in the next 10yrs.
Ok douche, go ahead and call it mud. My husband DID have halitosis. We addressed it after I talked to you girls on here and guess what? Years later, no problem. Mofongo, you're a cunt. Eat shit. ~anonnamus
Post by icedcoffee on May 19, 2023 11:16:11 GMT -5
The anesthesiologist during my first c-section was the biggest douche bag ever for the following reasons: --After the numbed me up I could still feel things and I told him and he said "oh you're fine". The OB overheard and was like "No. We won't start until you're comfortable" --After the pulled DS out my arm was killing me and I told him and he goes "oh--I see we have a complainer on our hands. It's because your arms are out to your side. You're fine". Which I later found out was gas pain from having an abdominal procedure and had he just added a gas-X to my med cocktail I wouldn't have had horrendous pain a few hours later that had me legit screaming. --He was on his phone during surgery.
During my second c/s I told the anesthesiologist about this and he was like "hold on I want to check your chart to see who it was" and when he saw the name he said "oh yeah--that doesn't surprise me. He's not here today." And he was the nicest guy who took great care of me.
ETA: I think in general medical staff need to remember that while it's a short and common surgery, c/s are still a major medical procedure. It's SURGERY where organs are pulled from your body to remove a child. ALL WHILE YOU ARE AWAKE!! If this were a man I swear to god they would put the man out. Some kindness would go a long way.
Some of you may know that when I was a freshman in college I had a daughter that I placed for adoption. The entire hospital experience was so crazy that I actually started a program of going into birthing units at hospitals and talking to their staff about adoption plans. Some of the highlights of my time (though there were many more) include them sending in a nurse who was adopted and having her tell me that she never thinks about her birth family ever and also because I was crying while my garbage was being emptied, the woman who was changing it told the staff that I had changed my mind, and they let the agency know that all hell had broke loose, those exact words, without me saying anything. I wasn’t even hyper ventilating or anything. It was just normal tears. The worst, though was the doctor who came in to talk to me about my daughter because she was having some trouble breathing and sucking. He told me that one of his children was born with only three fingers, so even educated people have babies with issues. Forget that I was in college, at a top university, and had a loving and supportive family. My family was there, and they saw them. It didn’t matter, though, to them I was just some uneducated, lowlife teen mom.
Same appointment, as he’s asking questions about my life, starts digging into my husband’s mental health diagnosis and starts demanding to know what caused my husband to be depressed (implying that it was a) somehow knowable, and b) my fault). He then writes down several Bible verses and tells me that I need to go read the Bible with my husband and I’ll feel better. I am not Christian.
Say what now???
This isn't even the most harmful thing in this thread, but I'm still .
I have always had low-level Dental anxiety for as long as I can remember. The few times I had filings done I could always still feel it and was always just told I was being dramatic. At 18 I had my 4 impacted wisdom teeth removed. I was fully awake and felt everything in spite of having been given novocaine. Even worse, after the procedure my jaw was stuck open (due to undiagnosed TMJ) and they forced it closed. I couldn’t open my mouth for nearly 2 weeks after that. Most of my adult life I avoided the dentist except for emergencies (I’m lucky that I have pretty healthy teeth). In 2020 I found a new dentist because one of my fillings had fallen out. I told him about my past issues with Novocain and he actually listened and told me that I probably have an extra nerve that some people have. He numbed me up and for the first time ever I felt nothing during the procedure. I’m still terrified of the dentist, but at least the rational side of my brain knows that dental work can be done without pain.
I finally came back to this thread, now that I’m out of this weeks medical anxiety spiral.
I’ve read them all and want to just offer hugs to all! All the ob/gyn stories do not help with my gyn avoidance. I finally found one a couple years ago, and she was so wonderful I started crying in the room. I saw her a week after seeing someone else about my necrotizing fibroids (that was the words in the scan) and heavy bleeding, and she has suggested that I’d be in menopause soon enough, why don’t we just try birth control pills (FYI, I have a history of smoking and stroke,) because, we don’t want to mess with my fertility. Perhaps you missed it lady, I’m 47, no kids, cancer twice… I don’t think I give a rats ass about my fertility.
And I remembered the time I went into my old PCPs office and was given a new resident. I was there because I hadn’t had a good nights sleep in 3 weeks. Because, within 3 months it is moving into a new neighborhood, there was a rash of break in. My across the street neighbor was robbed twice, and told us they took his guns. I just wanted to sleep, and there was a pretty clear thing affecting it. I was told I should walk my dog more and stop worrying because I had a dog. Because, you know, “stop worrying” helps?
My new oncologist loves to tell me to stop thinking about things that worry me. Every time he does that, I end up at my PCPs office, and she finds a way to reassure me and actually, you know, assess what I’m worried about. She is awesome. As is my old oncologist who would take the time to explain the why behind stuff, which helps me logic out of worry.
But yet… my two worst are a bone marrow biopsy, unsedated in the office. 19 years ago and still seared into my mind. Also, waking up during a minor surgery, where I was just twilighted but no one told me I was just twilighted. Of course, that same surgery they now do without any sedation. And when I had it two years ago, I was in a full blown panic attack in the waiting room when I realized they were going to be slicing into me with just lidocaine. I told them I would not sign my consent forms without Ativan. But they started before it kicked it. I couldn’t feel anything, but could hear every slice.
Post by litskispeciality on May 19, 2023 17:29:39 GMT -5
rubytue I'm so sorry. I know you don't say any of this for sympathy, but that sounds like literal hell.
As far as fibroids, GYN esp FEMALE GYN care makes me homicidal. They dismiss fibroids as if you have a hang nail. My old GYN would say "oh they're just the size of a cherry tomato" or "it hasn't grown much so no course of treatment needed". Then be annoyed that I was visiting again (re VERY) heavy bleeding that she would document as less heavy (well last time you said you oy changed pads x often...which was wrong and less frequent) because I wouldn't follow her advice to use an IUD. She knew I had no plans to have kids, I was 35+ ("high risk") and that my DH had a V, so fertility was no concern. The worst part was she always had NP GYN residents (is that what they're called?) so she was passing outdated, incorrect info on to a new generation!
Overall we have to start studying fibroids and better treatments rather than "we don't know what causes them, so don't be fat, don't use hormonal BC and just suck it up". Stepping off the soapbox.
Post by JayhawkGirl on May 19, 2023 18:46:05 GMT -5
Heading into my second sinus surgery I was very nervous. My first was much uglier than expected (10 min procedure took an hour, recovery was long and difficult). I was intentionally staying calm, keeping focused, talking myself up.
My pre-op nurse asks me who this guy is with me. I answer DH. Nurse replies with so glad it’s just one person, and goes on a rant about how a certain ethnic group bring so many people and so many wait and goes on for a moment as I’m glaring at him. I replied “we should all be so lucky to have so many people who love us.” He doubles down on his comments. I said “you’re taking about my friends and neighbors” and said again how lucky we are to have people who love us. DH squeezed my foot, interrupted him and asked how long until I go back. I reported the nurse at my follow up. The director of nursing and director of HR called me within the hour and then asked to speak to DH to hear his version since I had had versed pre-op. (I had it after his comments). They called back again later that day. We didn’t hear anything else but someone close to me knows that hospital well and based on the names of those who called me, they were confident it was taken very seriously.
Post by basilosaurus on May 19, 2023 19:24:24 GMT -5
This makes me want a s/o with good experiences, because some of these are downright terrifying, and probably criminal, too.
I'm not surprised that so many are around reproductive health. I thank the field for inventing the vibrator, but the entire history (of hysteria, etc) is so very awful. There's pretty much nothing a woman can do that is free from judgment. Too old, too young, too complaining...
This makes me want a s/o with good experiences, because some of these are downright terrifying, and probably criminal, too.
I'm not surprised that so many are around reproductive health. I thank the field for inventing the vibrator, but the entire history (of hysteria, etc) is so very awful. There's pretty much nothing a woman can do that is free from judgment. Too old, too young, too complaining...
Apparently the widely accepted history of the vibrator as stemming from treatment for hysteria is largely unfounded, and it was actually invented by a guy trying to make sure he could please his wife!
Post by litskispeciality on May 19, 2023 22:26:19 GMT -5
Thought of another one. My BIL had kidney problems for years and years and ended up having a kidney removed. His wife really thought about going to a lawyer about a malpractice suit because they ignored his issues until he lost a kidney, but they just didn't have the money, time and energy to fight. He also got *lucky* that his wife was laid off during the time of surgery or he'd have to stay at a rehab place IF insurance would cover it. Who knows if he could have kept both kidneys if they took his issues seriously from the get go.
Thought of another one. My BIL had kidney problems for years and years and ended up having a kidney removed. His wife really thought about going to a lawyer about a malpractice suit because they ignored his issues until he lost a kidney, but they just didn't have the money, time and energy to fight. He also got *lucky* that his wife was laid off during the time of surgery or he'd have to stay at a rehab place IF insurance would cover it. Who knows if he could have kept both kidneys if they took his issues seriously from the get go.
@@@ ETA: the IUD insertion, I think that doc was full of s. I have a friend who is very overweight to the point it's causing health problems who had to have an IUD inserted while under anesthesia, however she also has Endo and other GYN issues that make it harder to insert. It used to be said that women who've had babies were better candidates so to speak for IUDs because their uterus was stretched out, but that has nothing to do with weight. Not sure if that's still the recommendation as well since they push IUDs on everyone.
This makes me want a s/o with good experiences, because some of these are downright terrifying, and probably criminal, too.
I'm not surprised that so many are around reproductive health. I thank the field for inventing the vibrator, but the entire history (of hysteria, etc) is so very awful. There's pretty much nothing a woman can do that is free from judgment. Too old, too young, too complaining...
Apparently the widely accepted history of the vibrator as stemming from treatment for hysteria is largely unfounded, and it was actually invented by a guy trying to make sure he could please his wife!
I think a s/o is a good idea.
Wow. I had no idea! Yet another myth accepted as truth. Thank you for spinoff. I stand by the entire field and their judgment being a problem.
litskispeciality, I completely agree. For me, the difference was when I changed from a local ob/gyn office, that I assume mostly dealt with the ob side of things (like the waiting room was always full of pregnant ladies). I was so upset after one visit, that they insisted had to be in person in 2020, but the the doctor sat on the other side of the room and didn’t even exam me, she was also the one concern with fertility preservation. After that, I went home and called the office for the hospital associated with one of our medical schools in the city. The doctor I saw there was so awesome. Immediately scheduled an abalation and said we’d consider a hysterectomy is that failed. Another issues popped up just after the ablation, and I had to move to gyn oncology for 2 years. I’m due to go back now, and when I called, my doctor was out for 6 months, and I told them she is the only one I will see. and I’ll still probably need a xanex to make that appointment.
I have endometriosis and PCOS (among other non GYN medical issues), so it almost feels like bad medical experiences are expected. More than once, I've been in the ER for extreme pain and left in the hallway for HOURS. The only time I was in a room was for a pelvic exam. TW including when I had an ectopic pregnancy, which they were unable to diagnose. I was taken back quickly, but then just waited. I was there 10 hours (4 am to 2 pm) and was given nothing for pain, no food, nothing to drink, and a fucking gurney in the hallway. I had done fertility treatments to get pregnant and the date of my last period did not match with when I did my trigger shot (aka the day I ovulated) because I did back to back rounds of clomid. The first round didn't work, so rather than induce a period, my doctor had me start the next cycle. Totally normal and fine, but the US tech and the obgyn NP or PA refused to listen when I said I was at 6 or 7 weeks, not 9. My discharge paperwork and US results said "9wXd gestation" with some language about it being too small for that gestational age. Then the NP/PA questioned why I even bothered to use an RE when any regular doctor could give clomid and really made me feel like shit for it - even though I knew that was the right decision, especially considering I didn't respond to clomid appropriately!
Turns out the sac had nothing in it because the pregnancy was in my tube anyway. Which was discovered like 3 days later.
Carpal tunnel surgery with just a local and a sheet hanging up so that I couldn't see anything. I still felt every cut and stitch.
My Mom was getting a laparoscopy and the surgeon severed an artery. It was very touch and go. She was in the ICU for weeks and the hospital for something like 6 weeks. She has never been the same.