On a different note, is anyone watching True Detective: Night Country? I'm hooked! Spoiler: the "discovery" freaked me out. WTF!
Yes! I also read that it’s very connected to Season 1 which is bad news for me because I remember ZERO from S1 because it was A DECADE AGO lol
I read this too! We had tried to watch season 1 when it first aired and didn’t like it so I’m in the dark about that too. We started this season because of the new show runner and cast and I read an interview where they said you didn’t need to have watched the old seasons to watch this one.
Now I’m wondering if I should suck it up and watch season 1 or find old recaps?
You guys who are peeing every time you cough might benefit from pelvic floor PT. Not trying to make anyone feel bad, just that it doesn't have to be this way!
Oh how I wish that was an easy option. The closest option for me in a 1.5 hour drive each way. It was basically the same when I lived in a bigger city due to the Seattle area traffic.
You guys who are peeing every time you cough might benefit from pelvic floor PT. Not trying to make anyone feel bad, just that it doesn't have to be this way!
Oh how I wish that was an easy option. The closest option for me in a 1.5 hour drive each way. It was basically the same when I lived in a bigger city due to the Seattle area traffic.
I would LOVE pelvic floor PT.
The lack of focus on and availability of something that should be a normal part of female healthcare is maddening. I'm sorry, and I'm going to update my post because rereading it I think it comes across as flippant, which wasn't my intention.
A new development in the ongoing illness that has literally spread through our family starting on New Years day - I am now sick and have the kind of cough that makes you gasp for breath and fall over. Every time I cough I pee my pants, so I have basically crafted a diaper out of paper towels and this is my life now.
There has been sickness in my house since before Thanksgiving. First some virus that lasted forever and had me peeing my pants and wearing a paper towel diaper! Then Covid, with paper towel diaper. And now a stomach virus. At least I didn't pee while throwing up? My husband is the one that keeps bringing these illnesses home and he never stops complaining about how sick HE is. Guess how sympathetic I am while I'm stuffing paper towels in my pants.
I'm so sorry you are in the club, poor us! The paper towel companies must be making a killing though.
Yes! I also read that it’s very connected to Season 1 which is bad news for me because I remember ZERO from S1 because it was A DECADE AGO lol
I read this too! We had tried to watch season 1 when it first aired and didn’t like it so I’m in the dark about that too. We started this season because of the new show runner and cast and I read an interview where they said you didn’t need to have watched the old seasons to watch this one.
Now I’m wondering if I should suck it up and watch season 1 or find old recaps?
Like the ghost guy (Travis Cohl) is apparently the grandfather of the detective in S1 (Rust Cohl) and the symbol was in S1. I vaguely remember season 1 having symbols and something about a cult. But that’s all I can remember.
ETA: So probably you can enjoy this season just fine without having seen S1, but it may be richer or deeper if you have.
My youngest is home today due to pink eye. Which thank goodness because he’s with my mom. She took him over to my house to get some toys and found several inches of water in the basement and water pouring out. A complete disaster, which appears to have originated from my boiler?
Once again. I am so incredibly grateful for my parents who are taking care of this while I’m at work. My dad was able to shit off the boiler so it’s not pouring out the water anymore. A service person is coming over to evaluate and my parents are cleaning the basement.
I read this too! We had tried to watch season 1 when it first aired and didn’t like it so I’m in the dark about that too. We started this season because of the new show runner and cast and I read an interview where they said you didn’t need to have watched the old seasons to watch this one.
Now I’m wondering if I should suck it up and watch season 1 or find old recaps?
Like the ghost guy (Travis Cohl) is apparently the grandfather of the detective in S1 (Rust Cohl) and the symbol was in S1. I vaguely remember season 1 having symbols and something about a cult. But that’s all I can remember.
ETA: So probably you can enjoy this season just fine without having seen S1, but it may be richer or deeper if you have.
Interesting! I had read about the symbols but not the ghost connection. Maybe I will power through season 1 while I’m working on boring stuff so I can fill my husband in when we watch on Sundays. I hate missing details but don’t want to devote our evenings to catching up either.
Steal his phone, take a picture of the right stuff, and make it his lock screen photo.
This is hilarious and I love it.
I signed the kids up for ice skating lessons and they have an adult class at the same time, so I signed myself up for it too. H taught we how to ice skate enough to get around a rink, but I wanted to learn for real, especially how to stop. The lessons have been horribly unorganized and I hate them. They have 1 instructor for about 25 adults and skills range from can't stand up on ice skates to teens wanting to learn figure skating tricks. The first lesson was 1 hr of free skate, the 2nd and 3rd she tried to split between a beginner and advanced class, but I'm kind of in the middle so I got no attention. Even when I try to ask for tips, she will show me one thing and then skate away. I'm really annoyed and want to quit, but I'm trying to set a good example for my kids. Their lessons are way better with multiple instructors and they split the kids into 4 groups by ability and I wish I could join them! 5 more weeks to go.... I was proud of myself for trying something new and it has been really demoralizing how bad the class is run.
I would FOR SURE ask about getting a refund because the class is so unorganized and you are not getting what you paid for. It is different for your kids; it sounds like they are in a class that they are actually benefiting from. I would make sure you told the organizers that it is not the teacher's fault per say, but that there are too many people of varying abilities for one coach.
Post by litskispeciality on Jan 23, 2024 12:46:39 GMT -5
Thanks bex1973,, I tried talking to DH about buying 1 - 2 tickets and he was clear he doesn't want to go. He knows driving in to the city to see the show will stress me out so he's debating getting a second ticket just so I don't have to drive. I may have to suck it up or have him drive me in and out and just find something to do while I'm in the show. I haven't even looked if he's working the day I want tickets so I guess I can price out a ride share. Anyway, overthinking all of this, and hoping since it's not for 3 months I can ask everyone around me to cover (if necessary) so I can do one fun thing.
emilyinchile,, ugh to your friend and the wedding planning. It's funny my friend driving me crazy about May and June plans was so upset we didn't have open bar (it's reGi0nAl in my area) at our wedding because she'd have to pay for her own drinks. Honestly g/f you drink like 2 drinks, and for what I paid for the wedding rather than eloped like I wanted I think you can deal. People are just so annoying sometimes like plan for yourself and hope for the best.
Finally, unpopular opinion...I thought the first season of True Detective was super slow and I was let down with the ending, like "that's what we built up too?" I debated just watching the last episode, then maybe going back through the middle, but DH was insistent it would ruin it. I never made it to S2 and now we don't have whatever premium channel so I'll have to wait for a free preview or the library to get the DVD's
I'm actually still mad at my library for not having S2 of Yellowjackets yet, lol.
Post by pinkdutchtulips on Jan 23, 2024 12:55:00 GMT -5
PDQ
I really don't want to be her parent anymore. I've had to deal w her mental health issues and her refusal to do anything to better them for the better part of 10 years now (5yo onwards) w varying intensity. I'm just DONE. She won't attend outpatient bc she was bored the ONE day she's been there (she's been 'sick' the other days, in " " bc she's fine enough to hang out w friends but not ok to wake up early in the morning to be at outpatient by 8:30a). She's not onboard anymore with residential.
There was another altercation with our upstairs neighbor and rather than continue to live in our unit, we are being transferred just to get away from them (I'm sure the feeling is mutual). Its clear to me that she has ZERO desire to regulate her emotions, like none, zip, nada. She's happy going about life perfectly unhinged bc idk, she doesn't have to deal w the fallout?!? not realizing that I have to deal with the fallout. She doesn't want to go to school, doesn't want to do anything to help her mental health (meds, outpatient, residential), just wants to hang out w friends and watch movies, tv on her phone. Any time I merely suggest a boundary like a curfew (using my generous one from HS 11p weeknights, 1a weekends) its meet with a nope, i'm going to do whatever I want and what can you do to stop me.
Dealing w her is a nightmare bc she screams and yells and is wholly disruptive w zero effs not caring about anything. Disrupting neighbors to the point where eviction is on the table (which it is), she doesn't care. I had a talk w the nurse from her outpatient program (if she doesn't go tomorrow, she's being discharged bc she hasn't gone in 5d citing a cold) and she heard part of it. She told me that she didn't like me talking sh!t about her to the nurse. No, that's just a ordinary day w you from my perspective that is anything BUT ordinary. I have to work .... sometimes away from home. None of this is conducive to that and I lost a position due to her behaviors during Covid (didn't have a quiet place to work free from interruptions and distractions ... oy bc I had to make sure she was doing her online learning while I was trying to work).
I wish that I could take away her phone ... the one time I did she spat, punched, kicked, and verbally assaulted me, had the PD not showed up, she would have been putting holes through the wall.
Post by lavenderblue on Jan 23, 2024 13:08:02 GMT -5
I'm so sorry for everything that you are dealing with pinkdutchtulips I know you say that she won't agree to inpatient, but what about making it not optional? I don't know how it works in every state, but in my state you can have someone held without their consent if they are a danger to themselves or others, which sounds like what might be the situation here. When my ex-stepson was struggling with some mental health issues his parents were able to put him in to a residential mental health facility until he was stabilized, and same with my exH when he tried to harm himself last year.
You guys who are peeing every time you cough might benefit from pelvic floor PT. Not trying to make anyone feel bad, just that it doesn't have to be this way!
ETA: My intention is to be encouraging if anyone needs a push, not to ignore that so many people really don't have access to this kind of professional.
I wish the NHS would help me with this but they are hardly able to do things that have to do with potential death or dying (heart disease, etc). I'd guess my wait would be well over a year. I might check into it though.
((( pinkdutchtulips ))) You are literally the strongest person I "know" and it honestly feels like you have done everything you can - to your own detriment. Forgive me because I am NOT an expert in any of this but it sounds like she absolutely knows she's got the power hand in all of this and runs the show. You speak often of her making the choices to do or not do - do you have the ability to move away from the voluntary aspects. I know you mentioned residential and her not being onboard but can you make the decision without her buy in? It seems you have tried everything else.
I'm so sorry for everything that you are dealing with pinkdutchtulips I know you say that she won't agree to inpatient, but what about making it not optional? I don't know how it works in every state, but in my state you can have someone held without their consent if they are a danger to themselves or others, which sounds like what might be the situation here. When my ex-stepson was struggling with some mental health issues his parents were able to put him in to a residential mental health facility until he was stabilized, and same with my exH when he tried to harm himself last year.
In CA, anyone 13 and over has to consent. I feel that 13yo is WAY TOO YOUNG to be able to make that kind of a decision considering that they don't realize the danger they are to themselves or more importantly others. In a perfect world, she goes residential inpatient ASAP for how ever long it takes.
I signed the kids up for ice skating lessons and they have an adult class at the same time, so I signed myself up for it too. H taught we how to ice skate enough to get around a rink, but I wanted to learn for real, especially how to stop. The lessons have been horribly unorganized and I hate them. They have 1 instructor for about 25 adults and skills range from can't stand up on ice skates to teens wanting to learn figure skating tricks. The first lesson was 1 hr of free skate, the 2nd and 3rd she tried to split between a beginner and advanced class, but I'm kind of in the middle so I got no attention. Even when I try to ask for tips, she will show me one thing and then skate away. I'm really annoyed and want to quit, but I'm trying to set a good example for my kids. Their lessons are way better with multiple instructors and they split the kids into 4 groups by ability and I wish I could join them! 5 more weeks to go.... I was proud of myself for trying something new and it has been really demoralizing how bad the class is run.
I would FOR SURE ask about getting a refund because the class is so unorganized and you are not getting what you paid for. It is different for your kids; it sounds like they are in a class that they are actually benefiting from. I would make sure you told the organizers that it is not the teacher's fault per say, but that there are too many people of varying abilities for one coach.
Thanks, shauni27, and tacokick. I feel bad quitting because I'm not getting it as easy/quickly as I had hoped, but it really feels more like a supervised practice session than lessons. I should call the rec department and let them know and see if they will give me a refund. I could probably just go to open skate and watch youtube videos for the same experience.
((( pinkdutchtulips ))) You are literally the strongest person I "know" and it honestly feels like you have done everything you can - to your own detriment. Forgive me because I am NOT an expert in any of this but it sounds like she absolutely knows she's got the power hand in all of this and runs the show. You speak often of her making the choices to do or not do - do you have the ability to move away from the voluntary aspects. I know you mentioned residential and her not being onboard but can you make the decision without her buy in? It seems you have tried everything else.
She absolutely has the power and she knows this. She also knows that taking meds and treatment are all voluntary and her consent. Breaking that has been a very hard thing to do given that I'm one person who also has to work and take care of the house. Her therapists are looking at seeing how we can get her into residential treatment w/o her being onboard but the state of CA makes that very difficult.
I'm so sorry for everything that you are dealing with pinkdutchtulips I know you say that she won't agree to inpatient, but what about making it not optional? I don't know how it works in every state, but in my state you can have someone held without their consent if they are a danger to themselves or others, which sounds like what might be the situation here. When my ex-stepson was struggling with some mental health issues his parents were able to put him in to a residential mental health facility until he was stabilized, and same with my exH when he tried to harm himself last year.
In CA, anyone 13 and over has to consent. I feel that 13yo is WAY TOO YOUNG to be able to make that kind of a decision considering that they don't realize the danger they are to themselves or more importantly others. In a perfect world, she goes residential inpatient ASAP for how ever long it takes.
I just googled and it looks like in CA if her medical professional recommends it she can be placed on an involuntary hold. Maybe talk to her doctor and find out if that is an option? I'm in PA and I think that our laws are similar that at a fairly young age, I think it might also be 13, a person can make their own decisions regarding their mental health, but we still have the option of an involuntary hold. I'm keeping you in my thoughts, you are going through so much, I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you.
Post by wanderlustmom on Jan 23, 2024 13:42:22 GMT -5
Sorry to all having a hard time! January can be a tough month. My tennis elbow is bothering me a little bit today. Brought out the PT exercises and hope they help. Frustrating to deal with an injury when I'm trying to take care of myself. Work is busy today and I enjoyed a quiet house for a few hours since DH went in and DD was at school.
Post by litskispeciality on Jan 23, 2024 14:17:11 GMT -5
(((pinkdutchtulips))) I really hope they can advocate a protective order for all of your safety and sanity. Sadly I'm sure your most recent developments should only support that.
rubytue that would be amazing! My DH said something about the here and now the other day and that sent me down a Letters to Cleo rabbit hole, lol. You also remind me that I have a book by Matt Pinfield (MTV, 120 minutes) that I haven't read. He looks so much like the guy in the Pixes, lol.
This is exactly the point at which I decided I wanted another kid, because things were pretty easy. And now we have twins and everything is back to shit and I don't think we'll ever be in a good groove again 😅😅
Haha for me it's the opposite. I'm like dude, we're finally out of survival mode, why on earth do people get to this stage and then voluntarily ruin their lives by going back into the hell of newborn(s)?!?! But I will cross my fingers that even with twins as they grow up things will settle down for you guys again!
Haha exactly. We only are gonna have 1 kid but about 6 months ago I told my partner if we were gonna have 2 I’d just get it out the way and have 2 under 2.
Like you, at 14 months, I’m feeling good about our life. I signed up for my first half marathon in the spring. We have a good routine at home, we both have free time and also get to spend time with friends. The last piece is weaning breastfeeding, which I think will come in the next 6 months. No way am I going back haha.
pinkdutchtulips, I would absolutely be looking into what you can do for involuntary intake programs. Even the worst case I would think let's say you taking away her phone and her freaking out, call the police and have them bring her in? Of course, start with a less traumatic approach (through her PCP, which it sounds like you are doing) but I would not hesitate to call the police again the next time this happens and have the consequences of her actions be involuntary inpatient stay via the police.
((( pinkdutchtulips ))) You are literally the strongest person I "know" and it honestly feels like you have done everything you can - to your own detriment. Forgive me because I am NOT an expert in any of this but it sounds like she absolutely knows she's got the power hand in all of this and runs the show. You speak often of her making the choices to do or not do - do you have the ability to move away from the voluntary aspects. I know you mentioned residential and her not being onboard but can you make the decision without her buy in? It seems you have tried everything else.
She absolutely has the power and she knows this. She also knows that taking meds and treatment are all voluntary and her consent. Breaking that has been a very hard thing to do given that I'm one person who also has to work and take care of the house. Her therapists are looking at seeing how we can get her into residential treatment w/o her being onboard but the state of CA makes that very difficult.
I am sorry but I am going to parent-shame the two nimrods in the waiting room at urgent care yesterday.
#1 - It was clearly obvious these were first-time parents because not only did they squeal with joy over every little thing this child did, but they also had to record it. (I say this because I feel like most parents with more than 1 child are past this phase and just fucking tired.)
#2 - It is a waiting room at urgent care = sick people. Letting your clearly sick child, based on her horribly painful-sounding cough, walk all over the waiting room among other sick people is just not smart.
#3 - I am not sick. I am there with my ill mother. I do not want your sick "princess" coming up and touching me and based on all the dirty looks of the other people, no one else does either.
#4 - watching AND recording your little princess picking up a flower pot and dumping the entire contents on the floor, AND THEN not even offering to clean it up but leave it for the staff is just fucking rude.
And these were not teen parents. I'm guessing they were both in their early to mid 30s and the child was maybe 2.
I'd forgotten how discouraging job applications are. I applied to three or 4 different jobs in the past couple weeks that seemed like a shoe-in for at least an interview, but didn't make it past initial screenings for any of them. They were all jobs that I think I could do in my sleep. Everything is an automated submission system and it makes me wonder if a human ever even saw the application, or if I just didn't hit the right keywords to be picked up by a computer.
Anyway. I also applied to several stretch jobs, including a couple more today. I have mixed feelings about changing jobs but ultimately I've accepted low paying jobs for my whole career and am ready to make more money. Keep your fingers crossed for me.
Related: I'm so jealous of people who get jobs through their networks. I have never been connected to anyone who was in a position to recommend me for job. A good friend of mine has gotten basically all of her jobs that way and I'm jealous.