Post by Willis Jackson on Jun 1, 2012 12:21:36 GMT -5
I'm a big believer in the hygiene hypothesis so you'll almost never see me whip out the hand sanitizer.
I let DS have sips of my latte. It's decaf and unsweetened, but whoever is seeing the toddler chugging the Starbucks cup doesn't know that.
DD never wears socks. It's a losing battle so I don't bother anymore.
I don't give DS boosts on playground equipment, because I only want him to access areas he can navigate safely. I'm sure other parents think I'm lazy or mean. He doesn't ask so it's not a big deal.
My child is often barefoot and eating a pinecone. I'm sure plenty of judgement comes my way.
I judge frequently, flamefully, and silently. And then I forget about it. I promise, I have a diverse mom-friend network that helps me keep it real and not be an asshole out loud.
The only thing I catch myself really judging is carseats- forward vs. rearfacing or a kid that looks far too young sitting in the front. Then I try to remember that the kid may very well be older than I think.
My kid chews on tables, doesn't wear socks and I'm pretty big on encouraging her to play independently. Rolling around on the floor for hours a day is not my thing. That might make me a bad sahm. Oh, and I also drink and bf, but I am careful with the timing.
Post by hedgiecrazy on Jun 1, 2012 13:08:10 GMT -5
I judge parents who let their kids ruin things for other kids. We were at a puppet show at the library yesterday and the biggest kid there started playing with the stage, and a couple of smaller ones mimiced him...then the show restarted and it ended up with like seven kids standing up blocking the view for all the other kids, and some of the parents just ignoring it. I wanted to clap for the guy who walked up, picked his kid up and brought him back to his seat. The librarian ended up having to come up and restore order because the parents, who were all sitting RIGHT THERE wouldn't do it.
I also judge the non-vaxers. Hard.
I will totally be judgeable for food choices when she's older. Kids like spaghetti o's, doesn't bother me. As long as she eats other good stuff, it's fine in moderation. And I'm too cheap to buy organic.
I let her watch TV during tummy time...again, everything in moderation.
We also NIP and bed share which gets some people all up in arms.
Post by onomatopoeia on Jun 1, 2012 13:12:05 GMT -5
Oh god, everything. The behaviors my DS (6) sometimes has in public. The fact I let my kids pee outside (in our private yard). The fact I let my 2 kids go frog-catching every night for an hour before dinner. The food my kids eat, the fact the 6 year old still wears a diaper to bed, and the fact that I usually wait to get the kids a hair cut until 3 months after they really needed it.
Man, I'm judging myself right now. This all sounds really red-necky.
ETA: what I do judge are the parents who sit at t-ball practice, or at the playground, with their noses in their iphones or chatting with their friends, completely oblivious to the fact that their 6 year old just hit a grounder or their 3 year old is wandering around looking confused. Pay attention!
We go to the pastry shop almost every day after I pick up DD from school. I stopped indulging with DD myself once my ass started quickly expanding, but I still let her load up on the French pastries. Some days, she even has a pastry on the way to school if we're running late and there's no time for breakfast at home.
Best story of me being judged was when an old lady screamed at me on the sidewalk because DS wasn't wearing a hat and he was in the sun for 10 seconds. She yelled at me all the way down the block. And for the record, DS had on 60 SPF sunscreen and we were walking in the shade, but there happened to be a small gap of sunshine. Don't worry - he was fine.
I judge the parents who let their kids pee in a very well-populated public area - like in the little dirt area around the tree in the middle of the sidewalk (like where dogs pee) or in the playground (though by the fence). DS is not potty trained yet, so maybe I'll have a different opinion of this at that time BUT this is in a big city and I don't think it would be that hard to run into a bathroom. Even restaurants that say "bathrooms for customers only" would let a kid go.
Best story of me being judged was when an old lady screamed at me on the sidewalk because DS wasn't wearing a hat and he was in the sun for 10 seconds. She yelled at me all the way down the block. And for the record, DS had on 60 SPF sunscreen and we were walking in the shade, but there happened to be a small gap of sunshine. Don't worry - he was fine.
I judge the parents who let their kids pee in a very well-populated public area - like in the little dirt area around the tree in the middle of the sidewalk (like where dogs pee) or in the playground (though by the fence). DS is not potty trained yet, so maybe I'll have a different opinion of this at that time BUT this is in a big city and I don't think it would be that hard to run into a bathroom. Even restaurants that say "bathrooms for customers only" would let a kid go.
Guilty of letting my kid pee in a NYC playground, by the bushes. Those bathrooms they have are not always open or are being used when a newly potty-trained little person absolutely can't wait a minute longer. Sometimes you just don't have the luxury of time to walk to a restaurant and use their bathroom.
Happily, the I-can't-hold-it-anymore phase is long behind us and it's been a while since we had to pee outside a bathroom.
Best story of me being judged was when an old lady screamed at me on the sidewalk because DS wasn't wearing a hat and he was in the sun for 10 seconds. She yelled at me all the way down the block. And for the record, DS had on 60 SPF sunscreen and we were walking in the shade, but there happened to be a small gap of sunshine. Don't worry - he was fine.
I judge the parents who let their kids pee in a very well-populated public area - like in the little dirt area around the tree in the middle of the sidewalk (like where dogs pee) or in the playground (though by the fence). DS is not potty trained yet, so maybe I'll have a different opinion of this at that time BUT this is in a big city and I don't think it would be that hard to run into a bathroom. Even restaurants that say "bathrooms for customers only" would let a kid go.
Guilty of letting my kid pee in a NYC playground, by the bushes. Those bathrooms they have are not always open or are being used when a newly potty-trained little person absolutely can't wait a minute longer. Sometimes you just don't have the luxury of time to walk to a restaurant and use their bathroom.
Happily, the I-can't-hold-it-anymore phase is long behind us and it's been a while since we had to pee outside a bathroom.
Hahaha, I appreciate you tried to use the bushes. The playground peeing I saw was right out in the open and easily could be run through by other kids. The restaurant was more when I saw the kid peeing on the sidewalk tree right in front of an open Indian restaurant.
And I have no doubt I'll eat my words on this one day.
Post by liveintheville on Jun 1, 2012 14:06:57 GMT -5
We are judged for our kids eating habits. My father in law and sister in law both think our kids are going to grow up to be obese. They are 4.5 and 2 and both are failure to thrive. We see pedi GI and a nutritionist. So yeah they eat fatty foods, but that's based on a doctor's recommended diet.
We are judged for our kids eating habits. My father in law and sister in law both think our kids are going to grow up to be obese. They are 4.5 and 2 and both are failure to thrive. We see pedi GI and a nutritionist. So yeah they eat fatty foods, but that's based on a doctor's recommended diet.
How did they come to this diagnosis? My cousins boys are both underweight. Yes, the ones I babysit and just vented about. The 3.5 yo weighs the same as my 1.5 to and she's even on the smaller side. Of course, he doesn't exactly go to the doctor as often as he should....
I could be judged for dd2s shaved head, but her hair pulling has greatly improved! I could be judged for what my kids eat.
I judge people who don't discipline their kids. I judge my sister for giving nephew table foods that I don't think he's ready for, and for how much she feeds him. I love my sister, but I sometimes question her actions re nephew. But he is a happy healthy baby, so I try not to judge too harshly. and he's a little sweetheart!
We are judged for our kids eating habits. My father in law and sister in law both think our kids are going to grow up to be obese. They are 4.5 and 2 and both are failure to thrive. We see pedi GI and a nutritionist. So yeah they eat fatty foods, but that's based on a doctor's recommended diet.
How did they come to this diagnosis? My cousins boys are both underweight. Yes, the ones I babysit and just vented about. The 3.5 yo weighs the same as my 1.5 to and she's even on the smaller side. Of course, he doesn't exactly go to the doctor as often as he should....
They hadn't gained enough weight by their 1 year appt. Well, no change from 6 months to 12 months.
Kid 1 is 4.5 and weighs 30lbs even. Kid 2 is doing better and at 2 years weighs 23lbs.
How did they come to this diagnosis? My cousins boys are both underweight. Yes, the ones I babysit and just vented about. The 3.5 yo weighs the same as my 1.5 to and she's even on the smaller side. Of course, he doesn't exactly go to the doctor as often as he should....
They hadn't gained enough weight by their 1 year appt. Well, no change from 6 months to 12 months.
Kid 1 is 4.5 and weighs 30lbs even. Kid 2 is doing better and at 2 years weighs 23lbs.
Well then would a 25 lb 3.5 yo be of concern to you? When he was a baby, his mom was afraid feeding him too much would make him overweight like the rest of the family, therefore she limited what he ate. This has developed into him being satisfied on maybe five whole bites at mealtime now. She has taken to feeding him junk food now in hopes of him gaining weight, but its clear that its not working.
ETA: he started out at a normal birthweight around 7 lbs.
I give my kid a bottle. And 60% of the time it has formula in it!
I don't like her to be untidy or messy, so I always have at least 2 changes of clothes.
I BF, but not exclusively because Ive never liked the idea that I would be my kid's only food source. Shoot, hair appts can take 3 hrs! So. I pump and give her formula.
All of this when DD was little enough to still take a bottle.
What do I judge - people who let their kids ruin things for others. Like in a restaurant when kids that are old enough to know better behave like little hell beasts. I judge. Your baby is fussy in a restaurant, meh, no biggie. There's no reasoning with a baby (or even most toddlers).
I judge parents who let their kids have soda in sippy cups. I don't care if it's not caffinated - water is free in most places.
I judge parents who don't at least make a half hearted attempt to clean up after their baby/toddler/hell beast in public. Half of the dinner under the table? At least pick up the big pieces and leave a GENEROUS tip.
I judge parents who cannot gauge movies appropriateness for their children. Just because YOU want to see the newest horror flick doesn't make it appropriate for your 5 and 7yr olds (yes, I've actually seen this in the theaters - both of them had blankies that they put over their heads...). It's called a SITTER!
I know I was judged once for letting my DD chew/suck on a baby wipe. I was using it to wipe her face, she grabbed it and wouldn't let go. Rather than have her scream & fuss, I let her have it. Meh. Kids not gonna die from 1 wipe.
I usually make a separate dinner for DD. We always offer her some of the "real" dinner but there's usually a 2% chance she'll actually eat it. I know some parents will send their child away from the table hungry in order to train them to eat what the family is eating... but it's really not that big of a deal to me. I just want peace at the dinner table. Flame away.
It may be actually working in our favor because DD is slowly opening up to eating more types of food, now that we aren't fighting about it.
Oh yeah, sometimes I let her ride in the basket portion of the shopping cart when we're at Target. A store manager actually came over and admonished me for that once. I told him to mind his own business.
They hadn't gained enough weight by their 1 year appt. Well, no change from 6 months to 12 months.
Kid 1 is 4.5 and weighs 30lbs even. Kid 2 is doing better and at 2 years weighs 23lbs.
Well then would a 25 lb 3.5 yo be of concern to you? When he was a baby, his mom was afraid feeding him too much would make him overweight like the rest of the family, therefore she limited what he ate. This has developed into him being satisfied on maybe five whole bites at mealtime now. She has taken to feeding him junk food now in hopes of him gaining weight, but its clear that its not working.
ETA: he started out at a normal birthweight around 7 lbs.
At 3.5 kid 1 was probably 25lbs or under that. Really what they want to see is steady gain along the kid's curve. There are certain points where they shouldn't plateau. So we failed the 6 month to 12 month gain. He hovers around 1% on the charts for weight. But he's been there for a long time and he's following his own curve for height vs. weight so they're fine with it. Well, fine as in we no longer have to do pediasure and appetite enhancers. He's still drinking whole milk and being fed fatty foods.
I judge the people who let their kids ride bikes without helmets (I saw a baby in a seat on her mama's bike without a helmet! shudder)
I judge people that put the infant car seat on top of the seat portion of the shopping cart - that's just dangerous
I'm sure I'm judged for my wild almost 3yo's behavior at times or for letting the 5mo cry while I'm busy tending to her sister. I'm sure I'm also judged for my lack of make-up on occasion.
Post by statlerwaldorf on Jun 1, 2012 21:29:49 GMT -5
I let DD dig in the dirt, play in puddles and mud, and get messy. I always make sure she is cleaned up before we go out somewhere, but if you stop by my house in the middle of the afternoon, you will probably find her outside dirty and barefoot.
I let DD dig in the dirt, play in puddles and mud, and get messy. I always make sure she is cleaned up before we go out somewhere, but if you stop by my house in the middle of the afternoon, you will probably find her outside dirty and barefoot.
I bribe DD with popsickles all of the time.
I do this too! I played in the dirt as a kid and won't deny my DDs the fun of it! DD1 also likes to sleep in the nude, so we let her. We try to send her to bed in pjs, but they always end up coming off before she falls asleep anyway. I think we might have a nudist in the making! lol
The only thing I catch myself really judging is carseats- forward vs. rearfacing or a kid that looks far too young sitting in the front. Then I try to remember that the kid may very well be older than I think.
It doesn't matter how OLD they are, it matters how BIG they are!
I judge car seat stuff too. My friend has a 4 year old who sits in the front seat w/ the adult seat belt. It's SHOCKING to me.
My 2.5 year old is still rear-facing in the back b/c he is small. He will probably be in his Britax till he is 5! LOL.