You referred to Indy as your DH's "dream job". That says a lot. The salary package sounds fantastic! The only real negative I see on your list is that you're close to your DH's family - lol! Being a liberal pinko commie is fun; I'm sure you'll find your people there somewhere. I'd go for it!
You people are a lot more accepting of Indianopolis than I am. My H has been recruited for jobs in Alaska and Wyoming which would have been far better for us financially, but I got hives just thinking about it.
But anyway, I will say one nice thing about Indianopolis. I have heard that it has become a sort of hot bed of education reform and the schools may be better than they appear at first glance, or at the very least, significantly improving.
You people are a lot more accepting of Indianopolis than I am. My H has been recruited for jobs in Alaska and Wyoming which would have been far better for us financially, but I got hives just thinking about it.
But anyway, I will say one nice thing about Indianopolis. I have heard that it has become a sort of hot bed of education reform and the schools may be better than they appear at first glance, or at the very least, significantly improving.
I really know nothing about Indianapolis to really form on an opinion on it. I think I can be fairly certain Chicago is an awesomer city, but otherwise I haven't heard too much about Indianapolis overall.
You people are a lot more accepting of Indianopolis than I am. My H has been recruited for jobs in Alaska and Wyoming which would have been far better for us financially, but I got hives just thinking about it.
But anyway, I will say one nice thing about Indianopolis. I have heard that it has become a sort of hot bed of education reform and the schools may be better than they appear at first glance, or at the very least, significantly improving.
I will say AK and WY are less appealing to me than IN, too
The only thing I know about Indy is that BIL told me the top restaurant on Yelp was Melting Pot lol. So that tells me it probably is lacking some culture and uniqueness. But I bet there are still diamonds in the rough to be found.
You people are a lot more accepting of Indianopolis than I am. My H has been recruited for jobs in Alaska and Wyoming which would have been far better for us financially, but I got hives just thinking about it.
But anyway, I will say one nice thing about Indianopolis. I have heard that it has become a sort of hot bed of education reform and the schools may be better than they appear at first glance, or at the very least, significantly improving.
I will say AK and WY are less appealing to me than IN, too
He was also once recruited for a job in the more desirable city of Austin, and I threw a temper tantrum over that place too. But in my defense, we were not engaged, I still had two years left of law school, and I hate hot weather more than cold weather.
I think you could find culture etc in Indy as well. It would just mean a different kind of lifestyle. But I think it might be a good move for your family - YH would be happier, I think you would be less stressed b/c your H would be happier and his job would be less stressful, etc.
You people are a lot more accepting of Indianopolis than I am. My H has been recruited for jobs in Alaska and Wyoming which would have been far better for us financially, but I got hives just thinking about it.
But anyway, I will say one nice thing about Indianopolis. I have heard that it has become a sort of hot bed of education reform and the schools may be better than they appear at first glance, or at the very least, significantly improving.
See I assume almost anyone not living here has different standards for location than I do, so I kinda throw that out the window. Plus she grew up there and has talked about it before, so I assume it doesn't make her want to eat glass.
You people are a lot more accepting of Indianopolis than I am. My H has been recruited for jobs in Alaska and Wyoming which would have been far better for us financially, but I got hives just thinking about it.
But anyway, I will say one nice thing about Indianopolis. I have heard that it has become a sort of hot bed of education reform and the schools may be better than they appear at first glance, or at the very least, significantly improving.
See I assume almost anyone not living here has different standards for location than I do, so I kinda throw that out the window. Plus she grew up there and has talked about it before, so I assume it doesn't make her want to eat glass.
Post by SusanBAnthony on Mar 11, 2013 14:24:50 GMT -5
I would go to Indy with a timeline for escape in ask you hate it.
I would be ok with you not working as long as there is room in the budget for the little heathens to be in PT childcare so you can spend time job hunting and networking and house decorating.
Honestly although a night life would be great, seriously I have little kids. I am not going out at night much. That doesn't sway me. Just pick the most liberal neighborhood in Indy, and call it good.
We moved from Mpls (hipster and gay Capitol of the US) to a moderate city in ohio and it feels so conservative and small to me. I miss the good restaurants but like I said, no big night life for me. I have been able to find the liberals in less than a year with no problem- I found them in coops, Eco friendly stores, and organic farms and local foods committees, and through the farmers market. Now that I know where to look, I am amazed. Where as when we first moved here it was a major culture shock.
I haven't spent much time in Indianapolis, but the first time I took DH to Indiana to visit my family, we flew into Indy and drove north. He was genuinely confused as we left the city - he asked me "wait, where's the city?" Um...that was it, honey.
How much are mr man's student loans? (sorry, I'm a cash money ho. I always go with whatever puts the most scratch in my fabric fund. Well usually. lol)
I'm math lazy, but his monthly payments are $500, so that would go away.
Think of all you could do with that extra money, especially if it's a lower cost of live than what you currently have. that would fund fixing most of the cons (except the ILs and Red State issues)
SBP you know wherever you live you are gonna make a bigger mark on it then it on you, amiriteladies?
Plus lack-of-cultural people could make for more fun stories. I still like to envision you rolling that wicker couch down the street on a wagon with a "no refunds" sign.
OK, so I do not mean to diminish the importance of your career or job prospects, and my inner feminist cringes that I'm saying this. BUT. Since you are already PT and your H is the breadwinner, I do think it's important to think long and hard about how he can be happy at his job. Being happy (or, at a minimum, not miserable) at your job can totally revolutionize the way you look at life. How would it affect your marriage if his job situation changed? Is it possible to find anything comparable in Chicago? Those are the kinds of things that push me toward Indy.
I know it would take some work, but given that you grew up in the area, I bet you could find something once you start really looking and networking.
That said, I still hate Indianapolis, so I don't envy your dilemma.
This is totally true. DH's job is more important than mine and I'm totally aware of that. It just is. If I were the breadwinner he would make similar accommodations so this reality does not offend my feminist self. And I agree with you that because his job is more important, it is more important for him to be happy at it.
This is where my H would smile and say "Guided Discovery." I think you just solved your puzzle.
I think you could find culture etc in Indy as well. It would just mean a different kind of lifestyle. But I think it might be a good move for your family - YH would be happier, I think you would be less stressed b/c your H would be happier and his job would be less stressful, etc.
Also, I forgot. His hours are essentially 9-5 M-F. No weekend hours. Home for dinner every night.
The choice is obvious, isn't it. I kind of need to just settle myself with it. The school situation is really hard for me. I am in love with PTS's school. LOVE. I toured one of the fancy rich-people schools last week (in anticipation of all this coming down the pike) and it is doing the same thing PTS's school is doing but it's twice as expensive and you have to take an IQ test to get in. So the top notch in Indy is the ordinary parochial in Chicago. That's hard for me.
I think you did. And, maybe do more research on schools. I am hoping there are more out there.
Sbp we left this year and felt the schools were fine but we only had one child in kindergarten. This is not meant to be snarky but I grew up on the westside of Phoenix before the housing boom, I have lived and worked in MD (Prince Georges and SE DC) and then lived in South Chicago and if I am comparing Bloomington schools against those schools I would pick Bloomington. I had plenty of friends who did St Charles and some who homeschooled because they felt Bloomington schools were bad but I was happy. I guess my judgey reaction to these people/friends was they needed to move out of Bloomington to really experience a bad school district.
I will say our current move to GA was for DH's job and he is very happy and I am struggling to build our friend base and a life similar to what we had in Bloomington or even Chicago. It is getting better but it is slower than I would like.
Sorry for the snarky comment I was discussing preschools with several moms earlier today and they told me that they just couldn't send their child to a certain school they are zoned for because of all the ESL students and diversity. I am Mexican so I had to stand there and act polite
Signing in as another liberal in Indy. I can't tell you what to do in this situation, but I can promise you that you'll find other liberals here. Part of it will depend upon where you live, of course, but you can definitely find a community. I'm not sure if you have access to it, but Indianapolis Monthly just listed all of the pass rates, test scores, etc. of all of the schools in the city and burbs. I can try to track it down for you if you'd like.
I was discussing preschools with several moms earlier today and they told me that they just couldn't send their child to a certain school they are zoned for because of all the ESL students and diversity. I am Mexican so I had to stand there and act polite
Oh Hellz no. I'm pissed off for you. *starts rocking like Miss Sophia*
You people are a lot more accepting of Indianopolis than I am. My H has been recruited for jobs in Alaska and Wyoming which would have been far better for us financially, but I got hives just thinking about it.
But anyway, I will say one nice thing about Indianopolis. I have heard that it has become a sort of hot bed of education reform and the schools may be better than they appear at first glance, or at the very least, significantly improving.
See, I really do hate Indianapolis. I won't bore you with details.
BUT I also have the perspective of being the higher paid spouse in a hellish job. A year ago, I would have moved to fucking Muskogee, Oklahoma if would have meant I didn't think to myself on the way to work, "Gee, it wouldn't be so bad if that speeding car hit me while I crossed the street."
And while I might forgive you for throwing a shitfit about Austin since you weren't yet engaged, I am still going to give you a major side-eye. Austin is one of the only places I'd put up with that kind of heat for. It's just so amazingly awesome.
I live in an Indy suburb. The cost of living is great, and I love it here. What types of schools are you looking into? IPS is not great but there are some fantastic private schools and great suburban schools. Would you want to live in the city?
I was discussing preschools with several moms earlier today and they told me that they just couldn't send their child to a certain school they are zoned for because of all the ESL students and diversity. I am Mexican so I had to stand there and act polite
Oh Hellz no. I'm pissed off for you. *starts rocking like Miss Sophia*
Thank you. When they told me to send my kids to the private school I responded, " I don't think I should as my kids are the ones those kids are trying to get away from in the public schools." My kids and I do not look like your traditional Mexican.
There is a significant group of hippie liberals in Indy. I wouldn't let that be a reason to stop you from moving here. Even if the suburbs I think you'll find similar people. I spent 3 years as a pretty ultraconservative in a liberal part of town and it didn't bother me at all.
There are a lot of shitty schools in Indianapolis. However, there are some more than decent ones too. I don't get an objection to Zionsville schools. I think the new honors high school program at Southeastern is going to be awesome. Carmel kids do extremely well academically.
I was surprised to hear about the lack of pre-k programs. Did you check Primrose? Most people I know do Pre-K through a church. Christ the King, IMH, the Presbyterian church on Kessler may all be good options for you.
Chicago does have a lot of positives. It's a tough call. DH and I had to make the same choice a few years ago and picked Indy. We go to Chicago every 6 weeks or so.