Sitting here crying and would love some tough love from ML

[Deleted]

I am having a tough time. I have PPD and am on medication for it.  I feel great with respect to that and do not feel any fall out etc. 

However, on the friends front I feel so upset and I can't stop crying. Is it because my friends suck or is it hormones / ppd. 

So as I said some friends of mine got togehter on April 12th to throw me a surprise party.  It was small and was all my work friends.  some FB drama ensued where a friend of mine started shit on my wall about how she wasn't invited etc. 

I wound up deleting her comment and subsequently hiding her from my status updates.  She only ever made passive aggressive comments and I inboxed her that I didn't appreciate her snarkiness etc. 

Fast forward to last night. I see that FIVE others have deleted me.  That friend of mine from second grade who had emailed me that I was selfish for not calling her when I found out I was having a surprise party and inviting her (side note: this chick is good friends with PA FB chick.) She deleted me along with a loooong text about how I am cold, and I have pulled away from her and a few other really mean bitchy comments "You got fat and self conscious so you would never go out with us anywhere".  She was always the "mean girl" in HS and I see she never grew up.

So second grade friend, FB chick, 2nd grade friends husband, and two other friends from that circle have Deleted me on FB.  DH is like so what.. he doesnt' get that when someone does that its basically saying "Fuck you..I don't want to be your friend ever in real life or not"

While I know I am better off I am really hurt. I can't stop crying.  Rejection is rejection and it hurts. I can't believe I am dealing with mean girls at my age. 

[leeann]

This sounds really ridiculous on their part. You obviously did not plan the SURPRISE party and it's absurd for them to all turn on you and abandon you for something so trivial. I'm sorry, Sloan. Do they know about the PPD? Not that this changes my opinion, I am just curious if they know what you're going through.

[vanillacourage]

They sound like total bitches.  I know the initial rejection/whatever is tough, but you just 86'd a lot of negativity from your life.  In the long run it's for the best.

[goaskalice]

This is definitely an it's them not you issue. What bitches. I don't understand the passive aggressive I'm going to delete you on fb, that'll show em attitude. You probably don't want to hear it, but you're better off without people like that.

[eddy]

These bitches are stone cold. Count yourself lucky.

I am sorry you are having a hard time.

[nahoku]

((sloan)) I'm so sorry. They sound like awful people. I know it hurts right now but it really sounds like you'll be better off without them in your life. You don't need "friends" like that.

[daisybuchannan]

I am so sorry. That behavior is crazy in high school, but even more bizarre as an adult.

I'd consider yourself lucky to be getting away from such bitches.

Now, how can you try and meet more friends? Moms groups?

[pinkflats]

I'm so sorry, Sloan. I know it's way easier said than done, but try not to let this bother you. You didn't do anything wrong at all, it was a surprise party, it's not your fault people didn't get invited.

[LaceyV]

Seriously how old are these women? You didn't invite me to a party you didn't plan so we can't be friends anymore! For real? I think you're better off without them. Stick with the awesome friends who threw a party for you. And I'm sorry you have PPD, but I don't think you being upset has to do with the PPD, I think your so called friends just suck the big one.

[Deleted]

i'd be so hurt. i'd be crying too. and then i'd be mad that i was so sad so i'd be angry crying. and then i'd be sad all over again and then just sad crying. everyone wants to be loved, no one wants rejection.

fuck those bitches. i'll kick their asses for you.

[luckyval]

Apr 29, 2013 8:58:18 GMT -5 vanillacourage said:

They sound like total bitches.  I know the initial rejection/whatever is tough, but you just 86'd a lot of negativity from your life.  In the long run it's for the best.

qft

You don't need tough love from ML here. You got exactly what you needed in that some faux-friends that ofer no love or support are now out of your life

I just hate that you had to deal with that kind of immature drama. Put your time and energy into the positive stuff in your life - and you have a lot of that right now; take a fb break if you need to.

[angelaa73]

why would we ever tough love you over this. move on. get new (real!) friends

[rex]

I'd be hurt too.

But honestly, you are better off.

[janiejones]

Dude, now you just have room for more newer better friends in your life!

[Deleted]

Apr 29, 2013 9:05:20 GMT -5 cville said:

i'd be so hurt. i'd be crying too. and then i'd be mad that i was so sad so i'd be angry crying. and then i'd be sad all over again and then just sad crying. everyone wants to be loved, no one wants rejection.

fuck those bitches. i'll kick their asses for you.

OMG Cville that is exactly how I feel. and thanks for the offer to kick some ass... xoxox

[thedutchgirl]

Wow. So they are angry that you didn't invite them to a surprise party for you? That by definition you didn't plan? They sound unhinged.

I too would be upset at first. Then I'd remember that they are acting like three-year olds and I'm better off without them.

I'm sorry!!

[sparkythelawyer]

Me thinks these people were always weird.  Its not like they woke up on your birthday and said, "you know what?  I think I'll be a snatch today!"  They were always this way.  They've just done it big enough that they can't hide it at this point.

Time to go make new friends. 

[cc]

Apr 29, 2013 9:01:10 GMT -5 nahoku said:

((sloan)) I'm so sorry. They sound like awful people. I know it hurts right now but it really sounds like you'll be better off without them in your life. You don't need "friends" like that.

This exactly.

They are bitches and you are better off without them.

((sloan))

[snipsnsnails]

Oh, Sloan, I say with 1000% certainty that you are better off without this people in your life anymore. They were petty and hurtful. ((hugs))

[Deleted]

Apr 29, 2013 8:58:18 GMT -5 vanillacourage said:

They sound like total bitches.  I know the initial rejection/whatever is tough, but you just 86'd a lot of negativity from your life.  In the long run it's for the best.

I agree. You are better off with fewer, more wonderful friends than legions of dirtbags. 

Also, just saying, I happen to know one person who lives a couple exits up who adores you and who would love to become your IRL pal. 

[Deleted]

You are absolutely entitled to feel hurt or sad or angry but you have done nothing wrong. These "friends" sound like total assholes and you are SOOO much better off without them. They did you a favor.

[mushmouse]

I think hormones might be a little bit at play here.  How could you possibly invite people to a party you didn't know about.  They are irrational and you are blaming yourself.  Plus - it's facebook.  Some bitch you knew in 2nd grade deleting you can only make your life better.

These loons are not some kind of signal that you're life is going into a downward spiral!

[runforrest]

I'm so sorry Sloan

I would be really hurt and upset too, but I agree with everyone else that these girls suck and they don't deserve you. I understand that it's really hard right now and rejection sucks no matter how innocent you are in the whole process, so I would cry it out right now and be upset, and then tell them to eff off and move on.

They are being absolutely ridiculous to think that a) you suck for not inviting them to a SURPRISE party; b) they deserve to be invited to every.single.party involving you (that is just dumb); and c) for passive-aggressively emailing you and defriending rather than calling you up and calmly explaining why they felt hurt.

Andplusalso - to try to tear YOU down by saying this is your fault and throwing weight into the equation? NO no no no no. These girls suuuuuuuck.

Hugs.

[coribelle26]

Holy hell what a bunch of losers. I'm so sorry. I had a debacle with friendships ending a while back too and I know how much it sucked. I feel like these are people suffering from a colossal lack of perspective.

[Deleted]

Quit Facebook. One of the best things I've ever done.

[spitforspat]

I'm sorry. The only reason you should be upset is because you didn't get to unfriend them first. They're immature jerks.

[karmasabiotch]

Totally them and not you. Mean girls just become mean women.

[partiallysunny]

I know it hurts now, but you've honestly dodged a bullet here. These people were not your friends if they got that upset about not being invited to a surprise party.

[Deleted]

What are they, 12???

I'm so sorry you're going through this, but I agree with those who say you're much better off without these mean girl bitches.

[nadasteph]

These women turned something nice that other people did for you into something to make you feel bad about. And when you didn't fall all over yourself apologizing, they called you fat and said other awful things. They seem to have zero redeeming qualities. I know the rejection stings, especially since you have known them for so long, but in your head you know it's just rejection because there is no way you're upset over not having these "friends" in your life.