I’m a Mom and I’m Stoned Right Now

[ttt]

I can tell she was stoned by how awful this article is.

[pixy0stix]

I think the fact that she couldn't find Waldo indicates that maaaybe she shouldn't be in charge of a child if in an impaired state. I mean, if I was that drunk on alcohol, I would hope my husband was home to take care of the kid.

It's not the pot that bothers me, its the inability to react to situations, should they arise.

This also reminds me of a paper my mom had of my bio-dads that he wrote when he was really fucking high. It was supposed to be all metaphysical about smoking pot and how it made him more intelligent... and it was so full of errors and half thoughts that you couldn't figure out what he was trying to say.

[wawa]

I'd like to think this is going to be interesting, but I'm pretty sure it's going to be rather predictable instead.

[sb]

It is really unfortunate that comments are disabled on Jezebel today.

Edit: I can't find Waldo a lot, but the writing here does illustrate that she's clearly impaired. It sounds like the dad is around and hopefully sober. But seriously, read that. She is in no shape to be the only one caring for a baby. It sounds like she could wander off at any second and get distracted by the colors in the dryer.

[emmybean]

Why do you people keep trying to make me stop hating Jezebel?

[copzgirl1171]

Soooo, she gets high to deal with life and wants a cookie?

[heyjude]

I know some good, educated, professional moms who like to toke out on occasion. Of course I'm on the left coast so par for the course I guess. It's hard for me to judge since I like my glass of wine on occasion.

[Deleted]

Ahem. There is a difference between smoking weed and smoking yourself stupid. But people that don't know the difference should not be responsible for children.

[heyjude]

Jun 26, 2012 13:02:19 GMT -5 @copzgirl1171 said:

Soooo, she gets high to deal with life and wants a cookie?

Pot cookie.

[ttt]

I don't really care if people smoke pot, but this article has exactly the opposite of its intended effect. You're trying to tell me that it's totally OK to smoke pot as a mom, except you're telling me all about how you do it irresponsibly.

Also, it *is* illegal. Whether it should be is up for debate (I don't think it should be, personally), but for now, it is, and I don't think that it's right to do illegal things that might put your children in a bad situation.

I would also be super annoyed if my husband got stupid-stoned like this and then I had to be responsible for the kids AND answering all his annoying questions about Waldo and the Special Olympics.

[msmerymac]

Jun 26, 2012 13:02:19 GMT -5 @copzgirl1171 said:

Soooo, she gets high to deal with life and wants a cookie?

Or a bag of Doritos.

[heyjude]

It's not illegal for everyone, everywhere.

[msmerymac]

Jun 26, 2012 12:58:23 GMT -5 pixy0stix said:

I think the fact that she couldn't find Waldo indicates that maaaybe she shouldn't be in charge of a child if in an impaired state. I mean, if I was that drunk on alcohol, I would hope my husband was home to take care of the kid.

It's not the pot that bothers me, its the inability to react to situations, should they arise.

Her husband wasn't stoned, though. But I totally agree.

I mean, if I want to watch porn and go skinny dipping, I'll send my kid to my parents' for the weekend. I think THAT's what people mean about "growing up" and being responsible. There's a time and a place.

I think occasionally smoking pot when you child isn't under your direct care and someone else is responsible for his or her well being is fine, if that's your thing. (And if your spouse is okay with it - god knows I would not want to be making dinner, taking care of a toddler, and humoring someone who's stoned off their ass.)

Being a "stoner," though, is ridiculous. If you have a full time job, a house and kids, especially. There's a difference. It's like having a glass of wine with dinner every night and occassionally going on a date night to a bar, vs. doing body shots and blacking out every weekend.

[Deleted]

Jun 26, 2012 13:03:29 GMT -5 heyjude said:

Jun 26, 2012 13:02:19 GMT -5 @copzgirl1171 said:

Soooo, she gets high to deal with life and wants a cookie?

Pot cookie.

Can you make gluten free pot brownies?

I'm asking for a friend.

[pamela]

I think the worst part is she seems to have no clue that she is impaired and shouldn't be caring for the child. I know she said she waited until her husband was home to do it, but the rest of the article makes it sound like she thinks she's an awesome mom when stoned because she's so into the kid's normally snooze-inducing stuff. Not ok, at all.

[copzgirl1171]

Jun 26, 2012 13:11:13 GMT -5 @majorwife said:

See, I don't think it was all that irresponsible. She had her sober husband there. At least he had a clear head. And I don't know if it said how old her kid is. But being stoned with a toddler is probably a lot more fun than watching Dora with them while sober.

I would judge if she smoked in the other room or otherwise around the kid and was alone with her, but this is no worse than people that drink too much while parenting.

I PERSONALLY would be uncomfortable with my inability to make an emergency decision regarding my child should the need arise, clear headed husband or no.

[heyjude]

Jun 26, 2012 13:12:39 GMT -5 @angryharpy said:

Jun 26, 2012 13:03:29 GMT -5 heyjude said:

Pot cookie.

Can you make gluten free pot brownies?

I'm asking for a friend.

Why the hell not?

I'm not speaking from experience.

[wawa]

Jun 26, 2012 13:12:39 GMT -5 @angryharpy said:

Jun 26, 2012 13:03:29 GMT -5 heyjude said:

Pot cookie.

Can you make gluten free pot brownies?

I'm asking for a friend.

I don't see why not.

www.davidlebovitz.com/2011/08/gluten-free-brownies-recipe-chocolate/

Brownies work so well because the THC is fat soluable and the chocolate drowns out the taste. So you steep your pot in the melted butter, strain, and then proceed with the recipe.

ETA: Or so I've been told. By friends of friends.

[msmerymac]

Jun 26, 2012 13:12:39 GMT -5 @angryharpy said:

Jun 26, 2012 13:03:29 GMT -5 heyjude said:

Pot cookie.

Can you make gluten free pot brownies?

I'm asking for a friend.

Look into "black bean brownies." They are big in the diet world, and the black beans mimic a fudginess, I guess. You might still need flour, but probably less than you otherwise would. I don't know.

[druidp]

I honestly expect more pearl-clutching over her husband's joke about the Special Olympics than about her smoking a bowl.

[copzgirl1171]

My MIL and I have always threatened to smoke pot.

I am an illegal drug virgin.

[Deleted]

Jun 26, 2012 13:17:17 GMT -5 msmerymac said:

Jun 26, 2012 13:12:39 GMT -5 @angryharpy said:

Can you make gluten free pot brownies?

I'm asking for a friend.

Look into "black bean brownies." They are big in the diet world, and the black beans mimic a fudginess, I guess. You might still need flour, but probably less than you otherwise would. I don't know.

So, then not gluten free.

I seriously cannot even imagine eating black bean brownies. I've heard of them, but seriously, the brownie farts would be OOFC.

Thanks for the gluten free brownie recipe, wawa! I am just starting this today, at the behest of my gastroenterologist. I'm a bit cranky about it.

[lyssbobiss, Command, B613]

I feel like I have no idea what I just read. Pot doesn't have calories? Tell that to the entire can of cinnamon rolls I used to eat after smoking. Otherwise, I'm so completely lost. Sure, children are highly entertaining sometimes when you're stoned, I guess. Until there's like an emergency or something. Or you want to take a nap and the kid is all "go play!" Did no one else learn the lesson from that one episode of Roseanne where they found the pot and got high in the bathroom and then Roseanne was all worried that DJ would have an accident and need one of her organs but she couldn't give it to him because it was all full of pot? That one has always stuck with me and is precisely why I could never relax if I thought I would smoke up now that I have a kid.

[pamela]

Jun 26, 2012 13:16:05 GMT -5 @majorwife said:

Wouldn't adrenaline pretty much flush out your system in an emergency situation?

Somewhat, but sometimes that makes for an even more dangerous situtation because you don't feel impaired at all, but your mind is still somewhat impaired. So you may be able to physically react faster, but the decision on what to do might not be the best.

[heyjude]

Occasional pot smoking with a kid should be judged at the same level as occasional drinking with a kid.

Being a stoner w/ a kid should be judged the same way as being an alcoholic with a kid.

It's not black and white. Sometimes it's judgeworthy and sometimes it's not.

[taratru]

Jun 26, 2012 13:11:13 GMT -5 @majorwife said:

See, I don't think it was all that irresponsible. She had her sober husband there. At least he had a clear head. And I don't know if it said how old her kid is. But being stoned with a toddler is probably a lot more fun than watching Dora with them while sober.

I would judge if she smoked in the other room or otherwise around the kid and was alone with her, but this is no worse than people that drink too much while parenting.

Jumping on MW's bandwagon. Mostly to the bolded part.

[msmerymac]

Jun 26, 2012 13:19:53 GMT -5 @angryharpy said:

Jun 26, 2012 13:17:17 GMT -5 msmerymac said:

Look into "black bean brownies." They are big in the diet world, and the black beans mimic a fudginess, I guess. You might still need flour, but probably less than you otherwise would. I don't know.

So, then not gluten free.

I seriously cannot even imagine eating black bean brownies. I've heard of them, but seriously, the brownie farts would be OOFC.

Thanks for the gluten free brownie recipe, wawa! I am just starting this today, at the behest of my gastroenterologist. I'm a bit cranky about it.

No, but my thought process was that if it calls for less flour, you could use almond flour or something and not have them taste like ass. Except for the black bean part.

[dev22]

I don't find this any different than drinking around kids. I certainly wouldn't get smashed while being the main caregiver of a child, but a glass of wine? Sure. You don't have to get out of your mind stoned every time you smoke, just like you don't have to get plastered every time you drink.

Also, I found the article pretty funny.

In any case, I would not smoke pot in front of or around children. But I don't really judge those who do so responsibly.

[lyssbobiss, Command, B613]

Also, MW, I was highly disappointed because I thought when I opened this post that YOU would be the one who was stoned.

[Deleted]

At some point, don't you think her kid notices she's fucking high though? It's one thing for your kid to know that you smoke pot same as a kid knowing you're sipping a glass of wine. But imo, it's quite another for your kid to be able to look at you and know that you're drunk off your ass or high off your gourd.

But I'm an uptight heifer anyway and can't fathom keeping illegal substances in my house. Part of it is because I'm divorced and pinky's father would love an excuse. But in general, I just don't think it's smart to do this. After all, even if something happens to your kid that was straight up an accident and could have easily happened to the child of sober parents, how good do you think it's going to look when the cops realize you've been smoking the good stuff?