Post by LauraMoser on Jun 26, 2012 21:17:35 GMT -5
I haven't had this happen to me yet, but have heard of it happening to others. Pure curiosity here, what do you think her name should be? What's her middle name? Could/would you prefer to use that instead?
Is there anyone else who doesn't love their child's name (despite being the one to bestow it upon him/her)?
Long story, but I felt at around 26 weeks that Allison wasn't supposed to be Allison, but DH wouldn't budge (I had suggested the name in the first place). Because I had no alternative in mind and my heart wasn't set on something else, I didn't fight it. (It wasn't a battle around here or anything).
9 months later, her name STILL doesn't feel right to me. I rarely use it. I don't care for the nicknames for it (I didn't when we were set on it either), and I really thought by now that I would be used to it.
My sister thinks I am absoultey nuts because of this.
So what do you call her?
I adore my son's name. Always have. Every time I stop to think about it, I love how it sounds and how it fits him.
We love DD's name, even though it's very Irish and most people can't spell it or pronounce it on the first try. Does it "fit" her? I don't know. But it's pretty, people like it (once they learn how to pronounce it), and I don't feel weird trying to explain it any more.
LOL, DH's grandma called DD "the baby" until last Christmas. I finally told her she needed to learn my kid's name. And now she's no longer the baby, because DH's cousin adopted a baby a few months ago.
I would talk to your husband and see what he thinks. Maybe you just aren't used to it since you don't use it often? My sister and her husband call her baby "chupa" or "dog" so maybe this is a common thing. If you guys want though you could maybe pick Vicky or Ali or some other nickname.
I don't love DD1s first name--we chose it last minute...she goes by a NN of her middle (Wilhelmina) which was going to be her first name until I had the last minute panic & changed it to a very cautious name (Catherine). I never considered changing it.
I love DD's name, but it didn't feel like "her" until very recently - and she just turned two. Her nickname fits her, and she refers to herself by it most of the time, and the shortened version of her name fits her, but her full name took a while. I've always loved the name, but it took a long time for it to be her, if that makes any sense.
FWIW, her nickname has absolutely nothing to do with her actual name - could you find something you love that fits her and go that route?
I have three friends who changed their names when they went to college. Their HS and childhood friends know them by one name and their college & adult friends know them by another. I met them all later and can't imagine them at all as the names they used to be.
In two cases, they switched to their mns. In one case, she went from Jennifer to Gwen. Gwen really, really suits her. Apparently, her childhood friends called her Jenny, which doesn't fit her personality at all.
I really like the name Allison Victoria but I can understand if you don't think it suits her particular personality. I guess if I were in your situation, I would start using a nn. It could be something shortened from her name like Allie or something totally unrelated but cute. There are a lot of possibilities. GL!
I follow the blog mamabirddiaries and she went through a very similar situation and did actually change her daughters name. I thought you would find her blog post about it interesting
Post by cookiemdough on Jun 27, 2012 8:50:38 GMT -5
I can relate. My son is a junior and it meant a lot to DH for him to have his name so we went with it. Don't get me wrong he has a nice name, but it is not what I would have chosen. It took a minute for me to get used to referring to my son with that name.
Now we are going through the name discussions again for the girl and when I try to explain to my husband that I really want to love this name he doesn't really get why I am having a hard time deciding on something.
I love the name Allison!! I agree with Starry that if you start using it more then you will get used to it.
I had a few weeks of panic over DD1's name with she was 3. Her name is Peyton and I love the name! But out of no where I panicked that while her name is cute now, it wouldn't grow well into an adult. I think I drove DH crazy because it was so random that three years later I was second guessing her name. I got over it as quickly as it came on.
PS - I really like the suggestion of Alice as a possible NN.
Have you considered a combination of her first & middle names? Very Gone with the Wind (Scarlett's sisters: Susan Eleanor = Suellen, Caroline Irene = Careen).
It doesn't work with my DD1 but DD2 is Kristen Anne = Krisanne
Yeah, I have to agree that you just need to keep using it, and it will likely grow on you. My mom was not a fan of one nephew's name, but after a year or 2 she realized it fit him perfectly.
1) Change her name 2) Start using a nickname consistently 3) Start using Allison consistently.
I see this as an unreasonable choice: 1) Trying not to use her name or nicknames, and trying not to call her anything. I would have hated to know that my mom disliked my name growing up.
I still don't think my DD's given name suits her. I never did, but let DH have his way.
Livie is perfect for her, but I rarely if ever use Olivia.
Maybe I need to start considering the Allie, Alli, Ali route, though I didn't want to (and haven't decided on a spelling for when/if it happens). Our last name is a two syllable name ending in the -ie sound, so I was trying to avoid it.
Allie is my # 1 choice if this baby is a girl. Not allison, but Allie. I think it may be the cutest little girls name ever. You chould call your DD Allie ;D
I really like Alice. I also disagree with everyone telling you to suck it up and just start using it more often. I don't think it's *that* easy. But since your H isn't going to change his mine your best bet is to probably find a nn that you like - Alice, Ally(i), Lis, Vic, Tori, Rory, Toria,
I agree that you should either start using Allison or a nickname and just stick with it. Or, if you are really not feeling the name (which is lovely, by the way), or any nicknames related to it, then go ahead and change her name now to something you love. People will think it is odd, but they will quickly forget about it, and before long everyone will just think of her as the new name. We know a couple who started calling their daughter a different name when she was a few months old, then eventually changed her name legally when she was about 2, and it was obvious that the new name was the one she would always go by.
Just wanted to chime in, that I also do not feel that DS's name suits him. I completely agonized over naming him, throughout my entire pregnancy (He's 13 + months now). My H was flexible, but ultimately the name I loved he didn't like (Isaiah), and the names we both agreed on were too popular sounding (Brayden). I was really the sticking point, as I could not commit to any name. At about 30 weeks, one day I suggested (and thought I *loved*) the name Samuel. My H fell in love with it, and I of course changed my mind the next week. He never changed his mind and I couldn't make up my mind on ANY name, so we went with Samuel. They name I REALLY always loved, DH did not like, but agreed on it for a MN, so we have Samuel Isaiah. Essentially, I ended up not liking the first name, and DH doesn't like the middle name. LOL. Even to the extent that somewhere in the first several weeks, EVERY DAY I wished his name was Aaron. I have no idea why.
We all (family included) ended up calling him Sam or Sammy, and I've just decided it really isn't that big of a deal. I know its an absolutely fine (and actually, very nice) name, not over-used, and has good meaning. I totally enjoy calling him various affectionate nicknames, but also call him Sam several times per day.
Post by DarcyLongfellow on Jun 27, 2012 12:44:52 GMT -5
If I were in your situation, I would make a concerted effort to use her name as often as I could. I had some difficulties adjusting to my DD's name at first. We named her after my mom, so when my DD was born I had a hard time calling her Abigail because all I could picture was my mom, who I adore, but it just felt odd. The more I used the name, the more natural it felt, and now I can't imagine my DD having another name.
However, if your DD's name doesn't work for you, it may just not ever feel right. So what I'd do is pick a nickname. It doesn't have to be connected to one of her given names, or it can just be connected tangentally. Just pick something that you like and start using it. If it catches on, she'll just use that her whole life. If not, then it can be your special name for her. I'm from the South where having an odd nickname is common, so it doesn't seem particularly odd to me to name your kid one thing but call them something different.
I just did a google search for "nicknames for Allison" and came up with:
Allie (and it's various spellings) Lee Alice Lissy Lizzie (I guess from the "lis" in the middle) Izzie (playing off the Lizzie I suppose) Lisa Sonny/Sunny Alisa
I call her "the baby" when referring to others and a multitude of nicknames to her. But she does know her name.
We are friends with a couple who have a son with a really, um, unique name. The wife picked the name and the husband agreed to it only because the wife's other choices were even more "out there." To this day, the husband calls him "Little guy." I've never heard him say the kid's actual name. I always wondered if it's because he can't stand the name. So, you're not alone.