What percentage of your married friends were high school

[sonrisa]

or college sweethearts?

I noticed a lot of "I married him!" responses to the 19 year-olds-in-love thread.

In real life, I only can think of two couples who met in college and none in high school. Even with them, one of the couples separated so she could go to the peace corp for two years then reunited later.  In high school and college I never expected to marry someone i knew then. Marrying was something you did around 30 after having lots of adventures and finishing grad or professional school.

[wambam]

I did. We've known each other since we were 10, been together since 18.

[sonrisa]

Nov 21, 2013 8:08:35 GMT -5 wambam said:

I did. We've known each other since we were 10, been together since 18.

That is sweet. Are you the norm among your friends or outliers?

[lightbulbsun]

H and I met in college. At this point pretty much all of my college friends who are married met in college (I'm only 27, though).

I know one friend who met her H in high school, and they're separated right now.

ETA: I wasn't looking for a husband in college.  I never imagined myself getting married before 30.  H started out as a booty call, but then I actually got to know him and I couldn't imagine myself being happier with anyone else, as corny as that is. 

[Deleted]

One couple.

[flutterfly]

Out of all of my closest girlfriends, there are 8 of us, only two of us married college sweethearts (me and another). No one married their high school sweethearts. THANKFULLY.

[TrudyCampbell]

None in highschool but tons in college. I married my college bf and so did 4 other couples in my circle.

[Deleted]

Like 90%.

We all went to college together and married young. The very last of us are getting married now at 29-30, most still to college sweethearts.

Only myself and one other girl married our high school sweethearts.

[Amy]

None of our couple friends were, one couple was but they divorced.

I've known DH since 15 but didn't date until 22.

[Deleted]

H and I went to high school together, but didn't date until after we both graduated college.

There's a pretty decent percentage of college sweethearts in our friend group, I can't think of any high school.

[jinkies]

I married my high school boyfriend, but we broke up for 4 or 5 years and got back together after college. There is no one else in my circle of friends married to their high school sweetheart.

[Deleted]

One of my close friends married her junior high sweetheart. Can you imagine? Its been a tough road for them, though. They have a great relationship but really had to work hard early on, particularly during the 18-23 years when you go through so many big changes.

I went to a rural high school and while I moved away and don't know too many people anymore, most of them married each other and stayed local.

But of our friends now, most met during or after college.

[rupertpenny]

Most of them were college sweethearts. My h and I actually met after college, but we went to the same school at the same time so sometimes it seems like we dated in college since we have a lot of experiences in common.

[MrsAggie]

I can think of a few high school sweethearts. Most everyone else I know that's married, they met their H in college. I started dating H when I was 19- for all of 2 weeks before I turned 20

[MrsAggie]

Nov 21, 2013 8:14:52 GMT -5 @missusbee said:

One of my close friends married her junior high sweetheart. Can you imagine? Its been a tough road for them, though. They have a great relationship but really had to work hard early on, particularly during the 18-23 years when you go through so many big changes.

I went to a rural high school and while I moved away and don't know too many people anymore, most of them married each other and stayed local.

But of our friends now, most met during or after college.

I feel like if I dated the same guy from junior high on, I would always wonder "what if?". Like how do you really know he's completely compatible with you if you don't know what it's like to date anyone else?

[papie]

I know a few who met in college and 3-4 who met in high school?
We met at work.

[Deleted]

Nov 21, 2013 8:17:38 GMT -5 MrsAggie said:

Nov 21, 2013 8:14:52 GMT -5 @missusbee said:

One of my close friends married her junior high sweetheart. Can you imagine? Its been a tough road for them, though. They have a great relationship but really had to work hard early on, particularly during the 18-23 years when you go through so many big changes.

I went to a rural high school and while I moved away and don't know too many people anymore, most of them married each other and stayed local.

But of our friends now, most met during or after college.

I feel like if I dated the same guy from junior high on, I would always wonder "what if?". Like how do you really know he's completely compatible with you if you don't know what it's like to date anyone else?

I agree. But, I will say that I definitely got around before marrying H (both casually and with a few LTRs) and I still have that feeling to a certain extent. So IDK. 

[leancuisine]

I met my H in college, and I have two sets of friends that are married college sweethearts. One couple married just a few months after graduation. Myself and my best friend didnt tie the knot until 2 (me) or 4 (her) years later. There were other couples from school that also got married, but I didn't know them well.

I did move in with H while he went to professional school (which was in a different state). If I hadn't and we'd done long distance for 4 years... We probably wouldn't have lasted.

Most of my other college friends aren't married yet. I'd say that most married people I've met after college did not meet there (but I don't know all of thier 'how we met'
stories.

[sonrisa]

Interesting. I knew my peers were outliers on age of starting parenthood.I had thought of marrying your high school or college boyfriend as a sweet but old fashioned idea**. It sounds like it is pretty common among people here and their friends.

** (I thought it was an old fashioned idea specifically when I was a college student myself, with a serious boyfriend. I was one of the few of my college friends in a relationship that lasted long enough (over three years) it likely would have led to marriage in a different era. Living with him wasn't a big deal to me because he made a good roommate. But the idea of marrying him? Inconceivable. That had as much to do with him specifically as it did my preconceptions, though.)

[MrsAggie]

Nov 21, 2013 8:19:07 GMT -5 @missusbee said:

I agree. But, I will say that I definitely got around before marrying H (both casually and with a few LTRs) and I still have that feeling to a certain extent. So IDK. 

This is true but I've partied, made out with random dudes when I was drunk, done the one night stand thing, did the fuck buddy thing, and lived alone. I just can't imagine never being single. Not to mention, dating a couple of assholes made me really appreciate H, the nice guy.

[themysteriouswife]

Just us. We meet when I was 14 and he was 17. We started dating at 15 and 18. We have been together 13 years

[wambam]

Nov 21, 2013 8:09:36 GMT -5 sonrisa said:

Nov 21, 2013 8:08:35 GMT -5 wambam said:

I did. We've known each other since we were 10, been together since 18.

That is sweet. Are you the norm among your friends or outliers?

There is one other couple in our group of friends from school that stayed together. So I guess outliers. 

[candreco]

Several couples we're friends with knew each other in HS, but didn't start dating until a few years later. There are a bunch from my high school that did date in HS and got married, but I only know of most of these through FB, they're not friends.

[picaflora]

DH and I met and started dating in high school - my jr year his senior. Got married at 23 (a year after being out of college), and have been married 6 years.

I did date others in jr high/high school before DH. Sometimes I wonder how things would've been different if we hadn't met and started dating so soon... but I'm currently happy with the end result. We've had rough patches, but overall I think we're doing really well.

There are others from our high school that are married now, but not dated the whole way through. They either met up again in college or both ended up moving back to the area.

For our college friends I'd say 6 out of the 30 or so we hung out with married their college sweethearts.

[janiejones]

I married a HS boyfriend, and I am eternally embarrassed to tell people that. We started dating at the end of HS, and did some long distance.
None of our friends are with partners that they've known that long. In fact, we've been together 14 years, and the next closest would be a 10 year relationship.
I would say less than half of our friends are married yet (we are 32) that is just starting to happen in the past few years. We got married at 24, after 7 years dating.

[MWOS]

Almost everyone I knew/hung out with regularly married someone from our high school. Some of them didn't start dating til college, but seriously it's EVERYONE and it's weird

[janiejones]

Nov 21, 2013 8:29:27 GMT -5 Lucy Honeychurch said:

I do know a lot of people from high school who ended up married, but who didn't date at all in high school. Myself and H included; we never even started dating until well after college.

We know a few of these too.  Our mum's (MrJJ's or my BFF's) are always reporting back when it happens.

[Jalapeñomel]

Only 1

[bonnie]

H and I are HS sweethearts and so are our best friends. My H's parents are HS sweethearts too. Those are the only three couples I know that are. Everyone else I know met later on in life. So it's a pretty small percent.

[rex]

One high school, one college.