National Infertility Awareness Week (NIAW) Statuses

[rachelgreen]

** I'm zombie-ing this thread to make it easier since I was asked **

Ok, here it is. These are in no particular order but they are all ones I've used over the last however many years. I've created many of them myself but have also borrowed stats from Resolve and stolen statuses from other IFers along the way. All are fair game for the taking/using. I tried to remember to remove my name or my DH's name where applicable...but if not, let me know so I can edit please, lol.

---

USED THIS TO POST ON SATURDAY, BEFORE NIAW BEGINS
Tomorrow begins NIAW - National Infertility Awareness Week. As I have in years past, I will be sharing facts, stats, myths, & personal experiences from the last 6.5 years of dealing with our infertility. I refuse to suffer in silence. I am not alone. I am 1 in 8 couples. I AM what infertility looks like.


"George and I had hoped that I would be pregnant by the end of his congressional run. Then we hoped it would be by the time his own father announced his presidential run, then by the presidential primaries, the convention, the general election. But each milestone came and went. The calendar advanced, and there was no baby.

The English language lacks the words to mourn an absence. For the loss of a parent, grandparent, spouse, child or friend, we have all manner of words and phrases, some helpful some not. Still we are conditioned to say something, even if it is only “I’m sorry for your loss.” But for an absence, for someone who was never there at all, we are wordless to capture that particular emptiness. For those who deeply want children and are denied them, those missing babies hover like silent ephemeral shadows over their lives. Who can describe the feel of a tiny hand that is never held"
-Laura Bush

To put things into perspective, when we began to try to start our family:
~ Laura Bush was still our First Lady
~ The final Harry Potter book hadn't been released yet
~ Carrie Underwood had just won "Best New Artist"
~ Katherine Heigl was still on Grey's Anatomy and had just won her Emmy
~ Apple had just launched the iPhone the month prior
~ Hank Aaron's home run record had not yet been broken by Barry Bonds




(For a closing status)
With NIAW week ending yesterday, I want to thank everyone that has been there for us during our battle with infertility. Without every hug, kind word, shoulder to cry on, or ear to vent to, I know for a fact I wouldn't have made it to this point. You keep my sanity, you give me strength when I need it. I know who is there for me. I know who I can count on. For that, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

(another closing status)
One day we will find resolution to our path. When we do, I can't wait to share it with all those who love us and support our journey. Until then, take care and be kind to one another, for you never know what battle they are fighting.
rachelgreen & ross geller


The truth. I am not ashamed. Nor should any of you infertiles who are suffering in silence be. It is not your fault. There is always someone you can talk to: Me.
Infertility is not something to be ashamed of, it should be talked about. Get the word out!
Attachment Deleted



Today's Infertility message is an offer: Here's your chance to ask me anything you want about the subject. You can respond here, by PM, text, email, however you want. If I can't get you the answer, I assure you I can point you in the correct direction. Along the way I have met friends from from coast to coast, from across oceans, and from across US borders who are battling IF and our collective knowledge is hard to surpass. Or if you just want to know how to lend an ear, here is a link that might help. (Used with this link )


(This is my absolute favorite post to use every year. This video is brutally honest and completely summarizes my journey)
Today I am posting a video that is the most honest and accurate portrayal of our life. Every single word matches our infertility story, said much more eloquently than I ever could. I cannot sit and watch this without crying, and as I sit here typing this I say, "If there is one status or video or post you read of mine this week, I beg for it to be this one." Please watch this video and know that this is our path. Many thanks to Tears and Hope for creating this piece.
www.tearsandhope.com/





Although Tom Arnold's infertility is not the same as our issue, it is very refreshing to hear how open he and his wife, Ashley, are about their struggles. He went through 21 cycles of IVF with 4 different women, they had two miscarriages before Jax was born, she is open about the weight gain treatments can have.

My favorite quote from this article, "You have to be strong people in a strong marriage to endure that. It really weeds out the wimps and the shaky relationships, so as far as being good parent material, it’s probably for the best." Many of us know all too well the ups and downs couples have on this journey. It is not for the faint of heart.

As far as celebrity infertility articles go, this is one of the best I've seen in a long, long time. (with this link: celebritybabies.people.com/2013/04/20/tom-arnold-infertility-parenthood-exclusive/)





Infertility affects 7.3 million people in the U.S. This figure represents 12% of women of childbearing age, or 1 in 8 couples. (Ross Geller) and I are that 1 in 8. We are not ashamed of our diagnosis. We are not silent about it. We strive to overcome it. Everyone who battles infertility has different paths. At some point we will all find resolution: we give birth, we adopt, or we move on and live child free. None of this is anyone's decision but our own. The only form of support and well intended comments we need are those that say, "We are here for you. If we can do anything, let us know. Or better yet, infertility blows."




Infertility is...
Hushed conversations, secret struggles, common misconceptions, ignorance.

The reality is much more than that. The reality is a group of people who fight a battle everyday for a glimpse of what seems to come so easily to... everyone else.
People who face heartbreak and fear and loss and unanswerable questions every single day. People who question every choice they make. People who wonder what they did to deserve this. People who willingly subject their bodies to tests and treatments and probes and medications...
with no guarantee of their happily ever after.

Infertility is...
Getting excited when needles/syringes/medications arrive in the mail, (with a free cooler too!)

Watching your beautiful embryos on the screen...

...Only to be told two weeks later that your dream doesn't get to stay.

It's multiple injections daily that leave you with bumps and bruises in places that are not convenient to have bumps and bruises.

It's eyes so swollen from crying that you lie with ice packs in hopes of being presentable to the outside world.

It's laughing at yourself for thinking that maybe, just maybe this is the month.

It's watching "it" happen for everyone else.

It's a HUGE roller coaster of emotions.

It's hoping you'll be "that couple" who was told it would never happen but it did once they stopped trying/went on vacation/stopped stressing/got drunk/did thisthatortheother thing.

It's also finding a strength in yourself that you never knew existed.

It's finding new meaning in words like patience... hope... faith...

It's discovering a new path.

It's learning that even in the darkest of days, you will be ok.

Infertility is someone you know... your daughter, sister, aunt, niece,
cousin, friend...

Infertility is me...



Today's Infertility message is a simple one. Those suffering cannot make it without the love and support of friends and family. Sometimes Infertility brings former strangers together to commiserate over a painful struggle. Sometimes incredibly special friendships are created and cemented for life. For every status "like," comment, text, email or phone call saying they are here if needed, I say thank you. We infertiles remember who is there for us time and time again. Xoxo





Although ART (Assisted Reproductive Technology) is extremely helpful for some couples when conventional therapies fail, these procedures account for less than 5% of infertility services & represent only 0.003% of US healthcare costs. Only 15 states currently have some sort of mandated infertility treatment coverage. There are many people in this country who are fighting for this cause near and dear to my heart and I hope that with every NIAW and Advocacy Day, millions of people are made aware of the underfunded, misunderstood, and isolating disease that 1 in 8 couples battles. In time, I hope and pray that the glaring word "INFERTILITY" becomes less of a stigma. I wear my badge proudly. Infertility is me.



Many people lose their faith during this journey. Telling an infertile couple that it’s God’s plan is hurtful and upsetting. Basically you’re saying that God thinks crack heads and child abusers are more worthy to have a child than an infertile. Would you tell a cancer patient that it is God’s plan for them to be life-threateningly sick? Life is a series of events and circumstances that we can’t always control. But you can control your words. Infertiles deserve the same compassion, courtesy and empathy any other person dealing with a medical problem receives.




Infertility is a medically diagnosed disease and an emotional crisis with a wide variety of losses, disappointments, and 'costs': physical, financial, social, marital. Please don’t deny or minimize involuntary childlessness either by avoiding the topic or offering empty platitudes like "Just relax". It's ok if you say "I wish I knew what to say." Many times all we need is a sympathetic ear and a hug. When our struggles and pains are brushed aside or minimized, our pain deepens that much more - even when intentions are not meant to offend.



Infertility is a heart-wrenching, faith-questioning, relationship-testing, life-altering experience. April is Infertility Awareness Month. Whether a friend, a family member, a colleague or yourself has fought through this difficult fate that MILLIONS of women are fighting day in and day out. I'm posting this as someone you know has walked through hell and back for a chance to be a mom.



Another wonderful video to show the impact that infertility can have on the world.
"What IF?" Video
vimeo.com/11214833




This might be a good time to look at some infertility myths, and consider what infertility is not. Infertility is not limited to women. Infertility is not all in your head. Infertility is not limited to unhealthy people. Infertility is not limited to older couples. Infertility is not going to go away if you just “relax & go on vacation.” Adopting will also not take infertility away like Charlotte on Sex and the City. IVF is not a decision that stems from a flippant conversation. It can be weeks and weeks of pills, daily injections, daily blood draws, daily internal ultrasounds, painfully enlarged ovaries, surgical removal of follicles, bedrest, and emotional upheaval. Nothing about infertility is easily done like shown on 60 minute tv shows.  





Infertility is, indeed, a very painful struggle. The pain is similar to the grief over losing a loved one, but it is unique because it is a recurring grief. It's the pain of the unknown. This process happens month after month, year after year. It?s like having a deep cut that keeps getting opened right when it starts to heal.



IVF was introduced in the US in 1981. Since then, more than 114,000 American babies have been born through IVF & ART. Not every person who uses a form of ART will have 6 or 8 babies at once. Jon & Kate and Octomom are examples of irresponsibility that paint infertility treatments in a negative light. The vast majority of those who undergo treatment are responsible in their decisions.





Infertility 101: Get the facts
resolve.org/infertility-101/




25 things to say (and not to say) to an infertile
www.resolve.org/national-infertility-awareness-week/25-things-to-say-and-not-to-say.html


25 ways you can raise awareness
www.resolve.org/national-infertility-awareness-week/25-ways-you-can-raise-awareness.html

[bronxgirl]

thanks for posting this. I've never been brave enough to talk about IF on FB, but maybe this year I will.

[whiskeyandwine]

There is a part of me that thinks if I were dealing w/ any other serious, ongoing medical condition it would at least show up on my FB and then I don't know why I never post IF stuff on my FB.

And then I remember that I don't post anything meaningful or deep on my FB at all. lol.

[pooh8402]

Thank you so much!

[G22]

I love these. I think I'll be sharing a few on my blog and maybe FB too. Thanks RG!

[G22]

Apr 19, 2014 19:53:57 GMT -5 whiskeyandwine said:

And then I remember that I don't post anything meaningful or deep on my FB at all. lol.

I don't very often either. lol I can't even think of when I have, actually.

I save the deep stuff (which also rarely happens) for my blog. 

[whiskeyandwine]

Wait, I am worried my post came across as bitchy to rachelgreen which wasn't at all what I meant.

I think it is great that people are comfortable going public on FB - shit, you know I'll be liking your posts Rach!

I just usually keep my FB to reposting Huff-Po stories and pictures of my cat. The truly important things, you know? (kiss)

[rachelgreen]

I mean, you (whiskeyandwine and G22 ) see the shit I post currently and it's usually more "rachael" centric so posting this sort of info isn't out of the norm for me

I really use this week as a big way to get info out there to "the masses" because it's a disease that affects my daily life. I want infertility to get to the point where it's socially acceptable to talk about, with no stigmas attached, and it's normal to see awareness ribbons and "like this post if" just like autism or breast cancer awareness has.

[whiskeyandwine]

Apr 19, 2014 20:39:11 GMT -5 rachelgreen said:

I really use this week as a big way to get info out there to "the masses" because it's a disease that affects my daily life. I want infertility to get to the point where it's socially acceptable to talk about, with no stigmas attached, and it's normal to see awareness ribbons and "like this post if" just like autism or breast cancer awareness has.

Yes. God, yes me too.

Have to say, I'm pretty open about it in my normal everyday real life. Like, people closest to me all know. It is always awkward though, that first time you tell somebody. lol. I almost feel bad for people when it comes up.

[rachelgreen]

Apr 19, 2014 20:49:12 GMT -5 whiskeyandwine said:

Apr 19, 2014 20:39:11 GMT -5 rachelgreen said:

I really use this week as a big way to get info out there to "the masses" because it's a disease that affects my daily life. I want infertility to get to the point where it's socially acceptable to talk about, with no stigmas attached, and it's normal to see awareness ribbons and "like this post if" just like autism or breast cancer awareness has.

Yes. God, yes me too.

Have to say, I'm pretty open about it in my normal everyday real life. Like, people closest to me all know. It is always awkward though, that first time you tell somebody. lol. I almost feel bad for people when it comes up.

I know exactly what you mean about that awkwardness. And that is exactly why I want to de-stigmatize it. It shouldn't be awkward, you know? It's just life and some of us got a short stick in the babymaker departments, LOL. This whole country treats sex in general as such a taboo subject. It's natural, it happens, it isn't going away, hahaha.

[G22]

I used my blog to break to news about our IF and going through treatments. My mom called me the next day after she read it to see how I was doing. lol I suck at talking about serious stuff IRL, so I like using my blog for that sometimes.

[Muddled]

Can I blame it on the Clomid that this made me tear up.
Ugh. Talking about the ferry capsizing and all the texts made me weepy too.

[thoseareradishes]

Thank you rachelgreen. I really do hope that by talking about it (in whatever way we feel most comfortable), it will become less taboo.

[feistypants]

I borrowed your Saturday status tonight. I'm shocked at how many people have already commiserated -- new people this year, too! Thanks!!

[cherryvalance]

Thanks for sharing! We haven't been open beyond a couple of friends IRL, but I have been posting IF-related informational statuses here and there and these would be fantastic for NIAW.

[FastHands]

These are wonderful. Thanks for sharing, rach.

[Monica Geller]

Thanks for sharing Rach.

[bronxgirl]

so I took the leap and made a status update about IF.

[awick14]

Thank you for sharing. I'm not sure I'm brave enough to post any though.

[smittenkitten14]

Thank you. These are all really powerful. Don't know that I am brave enough to use any.

[Muddled]

Apr 20, 2014 21:19:02 GMT -5 bronxgirl said:

so I took the leap and made a status update about IF.

Good job. How do you feel?

[murdock]

Thank you! All of this is really great! I'll be emailing it to some people. It definitely made me tear up.

[rachelgreen]

Apr 21, 2014 8:27:06 GMT -5 Muddled said:

Apr 20, 2014 21:19:02 GMT -5 bronxgirl said:

so I took the leap and made a status update about IF.

Good job. How do you feel?

Yes! Way to go bronxgirl !!! I hope you only receive positive feedback. 

[bluelikejazz]

Thanks for sharing! Maybe by the end of the week I will be brave enough to post something.

[pooh8402]

I just posted too. DH really likes the Laura Bush quote so we'll use that tomorrow I think.

[discogranny]

rachelgreen - Is it ridiculous that I thought your husband was named George and he was running for congress for a minute?

Overall, my IF is pretty well known in my "real" life and I've accidentally outed myself on FB via likes and comments on blogs, etc but I'm still torn on posting a status directly. I am so ridiculously fearful of appearing to be an attention whore on FB that I don't generally even post about huge life events. I have a few people that are really pinging my infertility kindred spirit radar though and I'd love for them to be able to talk to me about it...so maybe I will.

[rachelgreen]

Apr 21, 2014 10:03:41 GMT -5 discogranny said:

rachelgreen - Is it ridiculous that I thought your husband was named George and he was running for congress for a minute?

Overall, my IF is pretty well known in my "real" life and I've accidentally outed myself on FB via likes and comments on blogs, etc but I'm still torn on posting a status directly. I am so ridiculously fearful of appearing to be an attention whore on FB that I don't generally even post about huge life events. I have a few people that are really pinging my infertility kindred spirit radar though and I'd love for them to be able to talk to me about it...so maybe I will.

hahaha. I love my Texans, lol. I just love that snip-it from her book. It's so eloquently true and honest.

As for your profile, what about modifiying the one above I have for the "offer to answer anything" IF related? You can point out that this is NIAW, say that you have "experience" and hope that if there is anyone out there that needs an ear to listen or a shoulder to cry on, you are there for them?

[FastHands]

Discies, you think that's bad? I was reading them and saw the "(Ross Gellar)" part in one and seriously almost replied "Rach! You left YH's name in that one!" ... ... ...

[pooh8402]

Apr 21, 2014 10:49:10 GMT -5 FastHands said:

Discies, you think that's bad? I was reading them and saw the "(Ross Gellar)" part in one and seriously almost replied "Rach! You left YH's name in that one!" ... ... ...

Me too!

[awick14]

FastHands & pooh8402 I thought the same thing.