I had a friend who changed her wedding plans a few months before the wedding. They decided they didn't want to spend cash on a the ceremony and reception. So their plan was to have their ceremony and reception on a cruise ship before it embarked (with them on it, of course.)
So the wedding invitations invited everyone to this shitty port city, and then asked for each attendee to send her a copy of their license and $35 because that's what the cruise line required to allow them on board for cake and punch, and the get off the boat before it left a few hours later.
And then she got mad because half the bridal party declined to participate and only some close family members attended. Because who wants to spend multiple days in a shitty port city on their own dime with a few months notice? So they can eat cake and punch on cruise ship they won't be traveling on?
I already shelled out about $500 just in attire she asked me to purchase as part of her bridal party, and when I refused to book a trip to shitty port city with a few months notice, it pretty much ended our friendship.
And I know she spent $15k between her wedding dress and wedding ring, so there was $0 reason to ask guests to pay $35 to sit on a boat and eat cake.
She wanted everyone to pay $35 to attend her wedding??!!
I posted about this a few months ago, but I'm involved in a wedding where the bride has suggested attire for the guests! (On the Knot page.) YAYYYY!!!
She kindly suggested that female guests don't wear much more makeup than their daily look or do anything special with their hair. SUPER HELPFUL. She also requested female guests avoid things like sequins, black, and white.
:/
The funny part is, I seriously had my eye on a navy sequin dress - but I just couldn't bring myself to violate the bride's "wishes." :/
I've got nothing by comparison here. A few email invites, a couple potluck weddings (which I really enjoyed, actually), occasionally registry info has been included.
Meh. Nothing so atrocious as some of the ones listed here.
We did have one set of friends that had to reschedule their wedding 2-3 times. But, they were working around her chemo treatments for some really aggressive cancer... No one thought that was unreasonable.
DH and I were probably the worst of the bunch - our wedding was on a Wednesday, just before Christmas. We had a whackload of reasons for choosing that date, and cleared it with the folks we really wanted to be sure could attend before we finalized the plan, but we knew it was a date that some folks just wouldn't be able to work with.
That said, depending on the circumstances I'm usually not offended by potluck invites. I would be offended by a wedding that required me to pay any sort of admission fee, though!
I posted about this a few months ago, but I'm involved in a wedding where the bride has suggested attire for the guests! (On the Knot page.) YAYYYY!!!
She kindly suggested that female guests don't wear much more makeup than their daily look or do anything special with their hair. SUPER HELPFUL. She also requested female guests avoid things like sequins, black, and white.
:/
The funny part is, I seriously had my eye on a navy sequin dress - but I just couldn't bring myself to violate the bride's "wishes." :/
Let me guess. This is also black tie?
Lolololll.
I wish.
The guys are basically being coached to all dress like hipsters. Bride seems to forget that the only brides that have carefully curated guests are those in Brides/ the knot magazine.
What the hell are the older family members going to do!? My guess...ignore and dress respectfully. Ugh.
I attended a potluck afternoon wedding. It was a poorly thrown together wedding. They danced the first song to a boom box that someone propped up on a chair.
I don't recall any particularly horrible wedding invites. My cousin is having a Halloween wedding this year, but it's on Thursday night (2 days before Halloween). I think that's a bit tacky, because it's really inconvenient for guests (like me, who may just skip since that would mean I need to take 2 days off of work since I'm OOT - but most of my family is local to him so I don't expect him to plan his wedding around me). I assume it's a financial choice, and I'm pretty sure he's sober (he's an addict but is clean, not sure if he drinks?) so I assume the wedding won't be a huge drinking event, if not completely dry.
I did once get invited to a shower for the bride of XH's former coworker. We had moved out of state and he was still friends with the guy, but I had never met either of them so it was odd to get an invitation for the bride's out of state shower. I think I just threw it away, I definitely didn't attend or send a gift. I assume it was a communication thing with the people who sent out the invitations and the bride didn't actually mean to invite me?
I got invited to a coworker's wedding but received an inset card that said something like "reception for close friends and family only". I was neither, lol.
Post by sillygoosegirl on Apr 3, 2015 19:46:04 GMT -5
Status on Facebook: "I just found out a bunch of the invitations were lost in the mail! Please come to my wedding! It's tomorrow at [details]."
I think I posted about it here at the time and some people thought that this was because not many of her A and mabe B list people were coming, but it turned out to be a cake and punch reception at the mega church where the wedding was held... So I don't think she had meant to not invite anyone at all. Though whether or not she had bothered to send a paper invite with my name on it, I do not know.
I went to a few weddings when we lived in the UK that had separate guest lists for the ceremony/seated meal and for the party/dancing after. I guess this is the norm there, but I still find it very odd. I didn't attend the ones where I was only invited to the after-party (no way in hell I was gonna drive two hours each way in nice clothes, without my non-invited husband, and not even get fed, and not be able to drink because I had to drive myself home after, or spend $200 on a hotel room).
Nothing tacky besides a missing rsvp card then getting a group email asking if we were coming or not.
Since we're telling crappy wedding stories: H's cousin had to get married in June on their grandparent's back-of-the-woods home. It was so humid, rainy, and outdoors. I ruined my new heels in the mud and got tons of mosquito bites. It was also a dry wedding. (Eta:no alcohol)
While we were on South Beach, Miami, there was a pretty wedding going on the beach. Except it was July, every member of the bridal party as noticeably sweaty, BMs were wearing heels on the beach. And sweaty, smelly, sun-burnt beach goers were swarming the beach and setting up their beach towels right up against the steamers blocking off the wedding section.
DH's cousin's invitation included a request to bring either an app, entree, or dessert. Potluck wedding! We declined.
This makes me kinda sad. Unless there is more to the story of declining, I don't think everyone has ill intent in planning such a wedding. I would assume they likely couldn't afford a wedding but wanted to celebrate with their family and friends. I would attend something like this in a heartbeat. Not everyone is fortunate to have a traditional wedding.
I've been a part of this type of wedding. What seems to work best is the aunts and uncles (or core set of folks) doing the organizing and giving most people an option to bring something or just attend as a guest. Anyone traveling more than a couple hours to attend would not be expected to bring anything.
I didn't even think about highchairs until reading this thread but I don't think I had any babies that age.
I honestly can't remember if I included registry info in our invite. I think I had a one liner, but it was long ago and I included lots of papers like maps, detailed directions, and detailed hotel info. I think my parents gave added info for their family and same with DH's parents. We were fresh out of college and invited some parents of the wedding party since they had gotten to know their kid's friends. I couldn't afford a full bar but we offered some wine and champagne and water and soda and had a cash bar (yes with tickets) if people wanted other drinks. My family side is used to cash bars and dollar dances (didn't do because I didn't want to dance with people) while DH's side is used to full bars. We were the first to get married of our friends (but not first in the large families) so hopefully we didn't get too many side eyes.
On the formal invite, I must have been in a haze, because I didn't put DH's parents names. My parents paid so I didn't screw up there but these are more modern times and I felt horrible later when I read other invites and realized my mistake. Great way to start off with the in-laws!
We have two -- both former coworkers of my husband.
1. Destination wedding at an all-inclusive resort in the the Dominican Republic. Meaning, the couple got a free wedding because they were going to be bringing people to the resort who would attend the wedding as part of the all-inclusive experience the guests had paid for. RSVP was by phone, which was very odd for a wedding. Registry info was included on the invitation. But the part that was really bad is that the hotel info card noted "Please note that if you do not stay at [the resort where the wedding was] you will be charged [however much a daypass to the resort was] to attend the wedding."
Did this invite also ask everyone to wear white?
Oh and related to this invite DH got, he went to the engagement dinner where he ate and then found out he had to pay for his meal and chip in to pay for the bride and grooms meal too. People split up the tab but DH wasn't going to fund the numerous drinks others had.
the venue doesn't have high-chairs so he'll have to sit on my lap at the reception..... Who knows what will actually happen next weekend (I'll report back).
the venue doesn't have high-chairs so he'll have to sit on my lap at the reception..... Who knows what will actually happen next weekend (I'll report back).
can you bring a booster?
We're flying....so not easily. We could do a Phil and Ted's Lobster, but I don't think those are supposed to be used on round tables (which most banquet hall tables are) and I don't really want to shell out the money for one event...
Someone invited women to her shower but not the wedding.
I had a friend do this as well, even when I gently tried to suggest that that wasn't how it was supposed to work.
Now, my BIL and his bride and planning to rescind some of their STD "invites" because a few people haven't been "supportive enough" over the last couple of months.
Your BIL and his bride aren't NuggetSister & Haitis, by any chance? nuggetbrain
not wedding invitation but I saw a GoFundMe post recently on Facebook. The girl and her future husband were looking for donations to help pay for their wedding...
One of my friends from grad school who I liked, but wasn't that close with sent me an e-mail inviting me to her wedding a month away...in India. I don't think it was a gift grab, just an odd way of letting people know she's getting married, but, umm, no I can't fly to India in a few weeks.
One of my friends from grad school who I liked, but wasn't that close with sent me an e-mail inviting me to her wedding a month away...in India. I don't think it was a gift grab, just an odd way of letting people know she's getting married, but, umm, no I can't fly to India in a few weeks.
One of our groomsmen sent my husband an email saying that he was getting married in 3 weeks (right before Christmas) -- in Damascus. And if we wanted to go, we needed to book and get to the embassy (in DC, I believe) that week because the visa process can take some time. Um... yeah, we didn't make it to Syria.
But I think this was a sincere "If you'd like to come, here is the info" and not a gift grab. He's just an odd duck and probably threw it together last-minute.