Can we do some confessions/flamefuls?

[Deleted]

Confession: today was B's two year appointment and he's only a little more than 34 inches. I know it's probably an old wive's tale but I always told myself he will be twice as tall as an adult as he is today and now he's not going to be six feet tall. I have the sads.

[Deleted]

May 27, 2015 21:07:25 GMT -5 Jennyanydots said:

May 27, 2015 21:05:53 GMT -5 @notquiteblushing said:

Confession: today was B's two year appointment and he's only a little more than 34 inches. I know it's probably an old wive's tale but I always told myself he will be twice as tall as an adult as he is today and now he's not going to be six feet tall. I have the sads.

And you want him to be six feet tall because...?

So women will want to marry him?  Plus all the other advantages of being tall.

[timorousbeastie]

May 27, 2015 21:05:53 GMT -5 @notquiteblushing said:

Confession: today was B's two year appointment and he's only a little more than 34 inches. I know it's probably an old wive's tale but I always told myself he will be twice as tall as an adult as he is today and now he's not going to be six feet tall. I have the sads.

If it makes you feel better, my parents were told I would only be 5'1" because of that calculation. I'm 5'8". There's still hope. 

[noodleskooze]

If I get the job I interviewed for on Tuesday, I will be going from a 5 min. commute to an hour (or more) commute for like $11k more.

You do what you gotta do.

[cjeanette]

May 27, 2015 21:09:39 GMT -5 @notquiteblushing said:

May 27, 2015 21:07:25 GMT -5 Jennyanydots said:

And you want him to be six feet tall because...?

So women will want to marry him?  Plus all the other advantages of being tall.

Ummm....plenty of women marry men under 6 ft. Smoking hot women.

Like me for instancem

[Deleted]

May 27, 2015 21:11:16 GMT -5 @this said:

May 27, 2015 21:05:53 GMT -5 @notquiteblushing said:

Confession: today was B's two year appointment and he's only a little more than 34 inches. I know it's probably an old wive's tale but I always told myself he will be twice as tall as an adult as he is today and now he's not going to be six feet tall. I have the sads.

This is not true. This would mean DD is going to be 6 and a half feet tall.

AFAIK the comparable old wive's tale for girls is their height at at 18 months doubles.

[anna7602]

May 27, 2015 21:11:43 GMT -5 h said:

May 27, 2015 21:01:53 GMT -5 @this said:

Yeah... the chorus of "Pish posh to your $20k!" is sounding pretty (lol) privileged.

We're very fortunate that we can make that discretionary decision, but I completely understand anyone who decides it is worth it.

It is undeniably privileged. Having $20k to spare on anything that is not essential--to avoid a long commute, to shift to a part-time schedule, to buy a bigger house, to travel, whatever--is inherently privileged. I am assuming most of us get that people in different financial circumstances would likely make different decisions (and probably would have made different decisions ourselves at other points in our lives).

But you are right. We sound obnoxious.

I stand by wanting to do the math to know exactly how much money we're talking about. And by the non-privileged reality that you may not find a good childcare solution to cover an extra two hours every day. I can barely get coverage for my 1-minute commute from the kitchen to my computer. The thought of having to figure out an extra two hours every day WHEN GRANDPARENTS AREN'T OFFERING TO BABYSIT makes me want to hurl.

[glitzy07]

May 27, 2015 21:12:44 GMT -5 noodleskooze said:

If I get the job I interviewed for on Tuesday, I will be going from a 5 min. commute to an hour (or more) commute for like $11k more.

You do what you gotta do.

I guess I was looking at it from the perspective of having a current, stable job and deciding to leave it for the new job. Obviously my answer would change if I were in a position where I needed to take what I could get. But if, for example, my current job was the one close to home and I was job searching just because, I'd definitely be pickier and weigh the cost/benefit of the commute more heavily.

[Deleted]

Sorry lovers of shorter men. I own my tall male preference. DH is fairly tall and so is every male in my family. I'm sure I'll grow (lol) to love my short son. Just let me be sad for one night.

[namasteak]

May 27, 2015 20:56:44 GMT -5 @littlemoxie said:

May 27, 2015 20:46:02 GMT -5 h said:

Based on the first few responses here (and, IIRC, a similar thread on MMM in the past), I am guessing the general consensus about whether a 60 minute commute is worth $20k is going to be different here than on ML.

I wonder why? Because we all have kids so time away from home seems to come at a higher cost? Because $20k is "worth" less to us on average?

I'm going to assume HHI is higher here.  It's a lot easier to say no to that extra money if you don't need it as badly.  ML seems to have a broader group of people in it than MMM.

The OP is unmarried, no kids but in a VHCOL city. I could see making that commute if the traffic wasn't sooo bad there. 1hr no traffic is close to 2 in rush hour. Even though it's 3 days a week that sounds miserable!

[noodleskooze]

May 27, 2015 21:18:22 GMT -5 glitzy07 said:

I guess I was looking at it from the perspective of having a current, stable job and deciding to leave it for the new job. Obviously my answer would change if I were in a position where I needed to take what I could get. But if, for example, my current job was the one close to home and I was job searching just because, I'd definitely be pickier and weigh the cost/benefit of the commute more heavily.

True. If I could find something close to home for what I make now (which is laughable), I'd be inclined to take it over the hour-away-but-more-money job.

[anna7602]

May 27, 2015 21:18:33 GMT -5 @notquiteblushing said:

Sorry lovers of shorter men. I own my tall male preference. DH is fairly tall and so is every male in my family. I'm sure I'll grow (lol) to love my short son. Just let me be sad for one night.

Tall men make me feel freakishly short and self-conscious.

[cleosprite]

May 27, 2015 18:33:34 GMT -5 Brie said:

This is kind of a depressing actual confession. I still blame myself for P's stroke. I think about how breezy I was and wonder if it was the hot baths I took or the occasional beer or the pedicure fumes or too much walking on the Disney trip or the home Doppler I used or the sinus infections I had that caused his stroke. Maybe I should have called about the reduced movement sooner or insisted on an u/s when I fell. I feel like I have no standing to weigh in on "is this okay?" type of posts because usually the answer is, "well, I did it, and my kid has irreparable brain damage, so," and I don't want to be Debbie Downer.

Logically I know it wasn't my fault. But emotionally the "what ifs" are fucking killer, man. I don't know if I'll ever be over it and sometimes I feel a strong urge to self medicate inappropriately.

I'm a lurker (trying to jump in more!) but I feel this way sometimes too. My kid's issues are not the same as your kid's, but when I was pregnant with my second (we didn't realize the extent of DS's issues until I was pregnant) I'd go to do something (like eat lunch meat), thinking, "oh, it's totally fine, I did this with DS and he's...oh." And then I'd pause and back off whatever it is I was going to do. To this day, I still get a little pissed off at the articles that say "pregnant women should not do x, y and z!" because I know that if something does go wrong, everybody tells you it's not your fault. But those stupid articles imply that it is.

Anyway. I just wanted you to know you're not the only one to feel this way. And it's not your fault. You did the best you could with the information you had and you're moving forward the best way you know how. Plenty of pregnant women take hot baths or drink an occasional beer and get pedicures and don't get ultrasounds when they fall and their kids are perfectly fine. Whatever perfect storm happened to cause your son's stroke likely have nothing to do with ANYTHING you did during pregnancy.

[anna7602]

I got sidetracked, but meant to post this much earlier: brooklyn, take the money and move!

[Deleted]

My company I've been contracting with since October has finally posted my job, so after its posted for two weeks and an interview it's mine. My boss really pushed for this and our budget is slim at the moment, so I know he had to really push it through.

Fucked up part is another company is courting me with a 60k raise (well, they're courting a guy I work with and his stipulation is he wants to take a two person team with him and I happen to be one of the two). CW guy informed me that may all be finalized in 2-3 weeks, as opposed to September timeline we had estimated.

So I feel kinda shitty for doing my boss dirty and leaving should this other job pan out, but there's no way I'm shitting on an extra 60k.

[noodleskooze]

Um BHW that's fantastic!

[meij]

May 27, 2015 21:05:53 GMT -5 @notquiteblushing said:

Confession: today was B's two year appointment and he's only a little more than 34 inches. I know it's probably an old wive's tale but I always told myself he will be twice as tall as an adult as he is today and now he's not going to be six feet tall. I have the sads.

Fear not! This old wives tale is in both my brother and my baby books, but it was height doubled at two. I remember this entry well because it was soooo off it was funny. We were both supposed to be 5'10", which would made us both 35 inches at two years of age. I didn't make it close to 5'10" but my brother is 6'4" (and a half I think lol).

[Deleted]

I do really like where I'm at now, and the way things are going it looks like they're mentoring me into a project manager role for data management. Which would be cool. So I definitely have mixed feelings to go and leave for something new, they've really given me a lot here.

[Deleted]

Also, wtf is with these ads on the app?

[badtzmaru22]

May 27, 2015 21:05:53 GMT -5 @notquiteblushing said:

Confession: today was B's two year appointment and he's only a little more than 34 inches. I know it's probably an old wive's tale but I always told myself he will be twice as tall as an adult as he is today and now he's not going to be six feet tall. I have the sads.

I get it. I was a tall two-year-old in a family of talls. And here I am, 5'6". Womp womp. I hope he defies the OWT in the opposite direction!

[iheartbanjos]

May 27, 2015 21:18:33 GMT -5 @notquiteblushing said:

Sorry lovers of shorter men. I own my tall male preference. DH is fairly tall and so is every male in my family. I'm sure I'll grow (lol) to love my short son. Just let me be sad for one night.

I totally understand your feelings. Seriously, though, don't take too much stock in that number.

[oswin]

Ok, so for once I have something to post, though it's more of an unpopular opinion really. I hate that most people (who don't live in dense cities) don't even think about walking distances less than a mile. Especially if their excuse is that it's hot outside. I live in Texas where summers do get very hot (though it's not as humid as Houston) and I despise the way that everyone makes themselves reliant on air conditioning. If you air condition your house, car, and place of work, and avoid going outside because "it's too hot", then your body never adjusts to the heat and it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Last summer my heat tolerance was way better than DH's because I could work from home and be comfortable keeping the house at 78-80 degrees (because I got used to it), while he had to go into an office air conditioned to 70 degrees and wear a jacket because it felt so cold. It just seems like such a monumental waste of resources the way everything is so air conditioned. I'm not saying do away with a/c, but turn it up a little!

[anna7602]

May 27, 2015 21:23:21 GMT -5 anna7602 said:

May 27, 2015 21:18:33 GMT -5 @notquiteblushing said:

Sorry lovers of shorter men. I own my tall male preference. DH is fairly tall and so is every male in my family. I'm sure I'll grow (lol) to love my short son. Just let me be sad for one night.

Tall men make me feel freakishly short and self-conscious.

@notquiteblushing, you made me have a sex dream about the one guy over 6 FT tall I've ever dated! And thanks to this thread, part of the action in the dream involved me trying to give him a BJ, but having to stand on my tiptoes to do so and feeling thwarted by the logistics!

[anna7602]

oswin, when DH and I went to Dallas, we left the rental car at the hotel and walked around. Everyone looked at us like we were aliens. Also, I remember asking someone how to get to a specific place and they started giving us driving directions. I clarified we were walking and the person didn't know how to tell us to go!

[Muddled]

May 28, 2015 6:48:31 GMT -5 anna7602 said:

May 27, 2015 21:23:21 GMT -5 anna7602 said:

Tall men make me feel freakishly short and self-conscious.

@notquiteblushing, you made me have a sex dream about the one guy over 6 FT tall I've ever dated! And thanks to this thread, part of the action in the dream involved me trying to give him a BJ, but having to stand on my tiptoes to do so and feeling thwarted by the logistics!

Lol. Was his penis at his shoulders?

oswin, it often gets to me that no one outside of cities seems to walk anywhere. I don't know about the heat thing though. I can tolerate much higher temps than H. I think it's just the way we are built to some extent. (and where we grew up)

[MNH2013]

@bettyhomewrecker That is awesome! To be able to get that at this time proves you kick ass.

*updates resume*

[whiskeyandwine]

May 28, 2015 7:02:02 GMT -5 @this said:

May 28, 2015 6:58:02 GMT -5 @bunnybean said:

I do care, but as a sidebar to this, sometimes this board freaks out about how a kid is strapped in, and I'm like, "What's wrong with how this person is doing it?!" And now I'm worried I do it wrong sometimes.

Oh yeah, I'm super paranoid about this. I mean I'm positive I do a great job with carseat safety everyday, but I've posted exactly one picture of DD in her carseat and I triple checked everything because I was afraid of getting critiquing PMs. lol

Me too! And he doesn't even go in the car. When he's in the car seat it's only so we can go on a walk in the stroller.

[dulcemariamar]

It seems that somebody posted all the cycles of America's Next Top Model on youtube so I binge watch it while my LO naps. If that is not bad enough, after watching it for a while I am starting to think it would be fun to go out and do all those photo shoots.

[Deleted]

My commute is almost an hour without $20k. Sad face

[Deleted]

May 28, 2015 6:56:49 GMT -5 pennypenny said:

May 27, 2015 19:03:27 GMT -5 CheeringCharm said:

Well the surprise vs. accident issue is one of those things that is hard to admit to. For some reason, I feel like the term "surprise" has a more positive connotation than "accident," which implies unwanted to me. That might just be me though, lol. I feel bad about admitting that DD was an accident though that is technically the truth.

I am so late to this, but I will turn to the infinite wisdom of Roseanne. Lol. A surprise is something you didn't know you wanted until you got it; an accident is something that if you could do over again you wouldn't.

Sent from my SCH-I535 using proboards

This is a really good way of putting it!