I am so impressed that you are getting the help you need and deserve. Good luck on this journey-it will be tough and scary but you can do this! Keeping you in my thoughts.
I'll be keeping you in my thoughts! We lost my husband's best friend of 20 years last September to suicide and I would've given anything to have him ask for help before it was too late. I'm glad you are seeking help and I am confident you can kick this!