VENTING inside, add your own if you wish

[ProfessorArtNerd]

He's mad at me, after I've had a terrible day with Lucy and David is teething and oh my god I'm so whatever about it.

Lucy was very upset and out of control at my parents' house today. She was snapping at my nephew who she is jealous of ( oh my god this is ridiculous) bc he sees his father every weekend. His father is an addict and he lives in like a halfway house or something. We live in the same house as her father. What the fuck.

BIL and SIL are in town for a wedding tomorrow. Staying with H's parents. They invited us to dinner but I didn't want to go. I already had plans with my mom. Maybe I'm a little clingy with her bc ya know she had cancer?

The gist of his anger with me, basically, is that it's my fault that he has no dinner and didn't get to hang out with his brother. He never eats dinner with us, yet I was supposed to bring it to him I guess.

Oh my god and I still feel guilty. Why do I still feelguilty?

Gold star to whoever read this, for real

Fuck

[papie]

(((Hugs))) and drinks my friend.

[berbles]

Oooh, I'd be so tempted to make dinner and throw it on the ground right in front of him.

But let's be honest, the reality is, I'd just lock myself in my room and cry.

I'm so sorry, profart.

[rex]

he couldn't drive himself to dinner with his brother if he cared that much? ugh he is awful. I am sorry ProfessorArtNerd.

[ProfessorArtNerd]

Aug 26, 2016 19:39:49 GMT -5 rex said:

he couldn't drive himself to dinner with his brother if he cared that much? ugh he is awful. I am sorry ProfessorArtNerd.

He has work tonight, he had to sleep. We didn't know about this visit or any plans til today.

I fucking hate this. His shitty overnight job and the way he handles it is going to end us

[janetplanet20]

Aug 26, 2016 19:39:49 GMT -5 rex said:

he couldn't drive himself to dinner with his brother if he cared that much? ugh he is awful. I am sorry ProfessorArtNerd.

I was wondering the same thing.

I'm sorry Professorartnerd.

[Deleted]

You feel guilty because he's spent years conditioning you to think this shit is your fault. It takes time to undo that.


((((Hugs))))




And he can just go fuck off.

[litebright]

I'm sorry, prof.

My dog celebrated National Dog Day by spending the day at the vet and getting 10 teeth pulled and the rest cleaned. He is so pathetic and druggy, and has pink drool. His teeth and gums were so much worse than I realized/than they looked.

I celebrated National Dog Day with a vet bill of more than 1K. I'm not sure who I feel sorrier for, him or myself. He needed it, it had to be done and it's partially my own fault for waiting so long -- maybe some of those teeth would've been okay if I'd done it a year ago.

But damn if that doesn't sting financially. I am going to drink heavily tonight. And probably be on a no-buy of anything except groceries until I start Christmas shopping.

[Jermys]

Want me to come surprise him with a punch to the dick? Because I could persuaded.

[ProfessorArtNerd]

mp I am working through this in therapy, absolutely. It's the entire reason I started.

[cuddlyevil]

Fuck him. Straight up fuck him.

What prevented him from going to dinner without you? Nothing.

He is a grade A asshole.

It's hard to get past the guilt, but you can and you will. You're taking all of the right steps.

[meganew]

You feel guilty because he's a manipulative shit pig. If he had to work and sleep, then why is he mad about missing dinner with his brother and SIL? He couldn't go anyway, right? But he's using this as an opportunity to make you feel bad about something that you can't control.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't working night shift his choice? He could switch if he wanted to, right?

[cuddlyevil]

Aug 26, 2016 19:43:38 GMT -5 ProfessorArtNerd said:

Aug 26, 2016 19:39:49 GMT -5 rex said:

he couldn't drive himself to dinner with his brother if he cared that much? ugh he is awful. I am sorry ProfessorArtNerd.

He has work tonight, he had to sleep. We didn't know about this visit or any plans til today.

I fucking hate this. His shitty overnight job and the way he handles it is going to end us

It's not his job. It's him.

I know plenty of people who have night jobs that don't treat their spouses and kids like shit.

You deserve so much more. L and D do also.

[lilafowler]

I love you. You deserve so much happiness. You're a good and kind person.

[ProfessorArtNerd]

Aug 26, 2016 19:57:47 GMT -5 meganew said:

You feel guilty because he's a manipulative shit pig. If he had to work and sleep, then why is he mad about missing dinner with his brother and SIL? He couldn't go anyway, right? But he's using this as an opportunity to make you feel bad about something that you can't control.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't working night shift his choice? He could switch if he wanted to, right?

Yes he could switch. Or at least ask to.

I'm so tired. I don't have any place where I feel comfortable

[thedutchgirl]

You tried to keep the peace for so long by doing everything he wanted that you feel guilty for not doing that now, even though doing it is crazy! When I stopped doing XH's laundry and he started handling his own dinner, I felt so guilty it was physically uncomfortable. Yay, codependence!

I'm glad you are in therapy. The dynamic in your house isn't healthy or normal or a true partnership. You'll get there--to getting out.

[awick14]

((Hugs)) I'm sorry you are going through this. I'm sorry that your daughter is starting to realize how out of the picture her dad is and she is starting to get jealous of your nephews dad. It's hard. ((Hugs))

[cville]

You don't deserve any of this. Nor do Lucy and David. I'm sorry he can't pull his head out of his own ass to see what he's losing.

[pretzel]

Aug 26, 2016 19:43:38 GMT -5 ProfessorArtNerd said:

Aug 26, 2016 19:39:49 GMT -5 rex said:

he couldn't drive himself to dinner with his brother if he cared that much? ugh he is awful. I am sorry ProfessorArtNerd .

He has work tonight, he had to sleep. We didn't know about this visit or any plans til today.

I fucking hate this. His shitty overnight job and the way he handles it is going to end us

And none of this is your fault or within your control. His reaction is all on him.

*hug*

[puddleofgrace]

I love you, friend.
I'm sorry.:-(

[blondemoment123]

Aug 26, 2016 20:09:04 GMT -5 ProfessorArtNerd said:

Aug 26, 2016 19:57:47 GMT -5 meganew said:

You feel guilty because he's a manipulative shit pig. If he had to work and sleep, then why is he mad about missing dinner with his brother and SIL? He couldn't go anyway, right? But he's using this as an opportunity to make you feel bad about something that you can't control.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't working night shift his choice? He could switch if he wanted to, right?

Yes he could switch. Or at least ask to.

I'm so tired. I don't have any place where I feel comfortable

((Hugs)) You deserve to feel comfortable in your own home. I'm so sorry you're going through this.

[jreeds]

I'm so sorry he continues to make you feel this way

[rex]

Aug 26, 2016 19:43:38 GMT -5 ProfessorArtNerd said:

Aug 26, 2016 19:39:49 GMT -5 rex said:

he couldn't drive himself to dinner with his brother if he cared that much? ugh he is awful. I am sorry ProfessorArtNerd.

He has work tonight, he had to sleep. We didn't know about this visit or any plans til today.

I fucking hate this. His shitty overnight job and the way he handles it is going to end us

hugs to you.

[spitforspat]

(((Profart)))

[Jalapeñomel]

((((Hugs)))

[JLV]

I'm so sorry he's being a jerk. You have done absolutely nothing wrong and don't deserve this.

My husband is also in a mood because I went for ice cream after work and he was hungry. I came home and he still didn't eat dinner and I kept asking him what he wanted and he said "I'll just eat pretzels". Whatever. Two hours later my sister and I decided to order Chinese and I asked if he wanted anything and he said no. When it came he got all huffy and went to bed.

Dude, you're 36 years old. You can feed yourself.

[underwaterrhymes]

Big hugs.

If your husband got a flat tire in my driveway, I would NOT offer him lemonade.

[adhdfashion]

Archer is teething, Mia ate something at the local Mexican joint that isn't agreeing with her, and Natalie is being a total butt head.
H is working till 8pm.
I have takeout pizza and Costco sized bottle of wine. I plan to drown my sorrows.

[hisno1girl]

When to go see The Mechanic with Jason Stathyum.

It gave me motion sickness.

Luckily, the theater gave me a refund.

[elleblue]

I'm sorry ProfessorArtNerd, you don't deserve his treatment of you. Dinner with his bro was impossible, regardless of whether you wanted to go or not, he's obviously just in the habit of blaming you for everything. And that's not something you should have to put up with any more. *hugs*