S/O is your H/SO the same race/nationality as you?

[persa]

I'm Iranian and an immigrant and my H is white. My in laws are super sweet. My parents are crazy and kind of intrusive. I have a ton of extended family in the area as well and we're pretty close but I don't get to see them as often as I like, partly due to my work schedule, partly because I have young kids with early bedtimes. But there's also the fact that my H is a little bit of a misanthrope and has some anxiety issues. He has a hard time with all the socialization that comes with a big middle eastern family, especially the spontaneity. I feel like I miss out on a lot of family time because of it and that's the biggest challenge for me but I don't think that's a White vs Non-white thing, I think that's more of a personality thing.

[DesertMoon]

Sept 13, 2016 23:14:32 GMT -5 persa said:

I'm Iranian and an immigrant and my H is white. My in laws are super sweet. My parents are crazy and kind of intrusive. I have a ton of extended family in the area as well and we're pretty close but I don't get to see them as often as I like, partly due to my work schedule, partly because I have young kids with early bedtimes. But there's also the fact that my H is a little bit of a misanthrope and has some anxiety issues. He has a hard time with all the socialization that comes with a big middle eastern family, especially the spontaneity. I feel like I miss out on a lot of family time because of it and that's the biggest challenge for me but I don't think that's a White vs Non-white thing, I think that's more of a personality thing.

DHs family is mostly Lebanese and they're super fancy and proper, my family is Iraqi and really in your face, loud affectionate and silly. I find it hard to be around his family too long because I feel like I'm holding my breath...which spoon do I use? Oh god I have to bring slippers because they side eye me for walking barefoot in the house. Don't forget to wear makeup or you'll be scolded. I just a miss wearing pjs being barefoot drinking tea and playing gin with my family while cussing at each other and accusing everyone of cheating. Being so fancy is tiring, I also get anxiety about it too.


Lol wow I just realized that was a huge rant haha sorry, I'm just missing my parents a lot this week.

[iammalcolmx]

Sept 13, 2016 16:50:47 GMT -5 itsme said:

Sept 13, 2016 16:49:29 GMT -5 DesertMoon said:

It's like $200 though right? I heart last X as it was only 100, wonder if they'll do that again this year

I did the Ancestry. com one and it was about $100.  There was a code out there for a discount or you can get a referral to get 10% off. 

I am not doing this because if I don't come back 80% African I am going to sue my parents. Think I am playing??

[DesertMoon]

Sept 14, 2016 12:05:49 GMT -5 iammalcolmx said:

Sept 13, 2016 16:50:47 GMT -5 itsme said:

I did the Ancestry. com one and it was about $100.  There was a code out there for a discount or you can get a referral to get 10% off. 

I am not doing this because if I don't come back 80% African I am going to sue my parents. Think I am playing??

You told me that! My friend Lydia said the same! She's like if I don't come back 100% Jordanian I will be devestated. I can understand that perspective.

[iammalcolmx]

Sept 14, 2016 12:14:21 GMT -5 DesertMoon said:

Sept 14, 2016 12:05:49 GMT -5 iammalcolmx said:

I am not doing this because if I don't come back 80% African I am going to sue my parents. Think I am playing??

You told me that! My friend Lydia said the same! She's like if I don't come back 100% Jordanian I will be devestated. I can understand that perspective.

My Momma is a lot browner than me and I Dad pretends* to be. There aren't any white people in my immediate family and slavery was long enough that most of the slave-master should have washed out of my genes. I SWEAR I would sue those Negros............... I am already pretty pissed at the minimal color I was given. I was pretty brown as a child but it was all a damn lie since I spent my summers on the Chesapeake Bay and always had this deceptive tan. ::sucks teeth::

*He lives near the beach therefore is always tanned.

[itsme]

Sept 14, 2016 12:05:49 GMT -5 iammalcolmx said:

Sept 13, 2016 16:50:47 GMT -5 itsme said:

I did the Ancestry. com one and it was about $100.  There was a code out there for a discount or you can get a referral to get 10% off. 

I am not doing this because if I don't come back 80% African I am going to sue my parents. Think I am playing??

I can completely understand.  I'm trying to come to terms with the newly discovered Irish & Scandinavian part of my DNA.  Where in the hell did that come from?!  Spanish I knew would be the most prevalent, African totally makes sense with my PR side, Native American (South America) totally suspected so, but Irish?  You grow up thinking one thing and then find out something different.  Granted, I knew there was some mixing going on but the mixing supposed family history says is NOT the results I got.  Mhhmm, what was really going on people?  

[raangoli]

Sept 14, 2016 12:14:21 GMT -5 DesertMoon said:

Sept 14, 2016 12:05:49 GMT -5 iammalcolmx said:

I am not doing this because if I don't come back 80% African I am going to sue my parents. Think I am playing??

You told me that! My friend Lydia said the same! She's like if I don't come back 100% Jordanian I will be devestated. I can understand that perspective.

I am always curious about these since I would assume that I'd come back as 100% Indian. But then what if I don't? Who the hell is going to explain that? In elementary school we had to do family trees and I got  as far as maybe my great grandparents. After that my parents were like, "meh, who knows, no one told us".

[anna7602]

Sept 14, 2016 13:24:51 GMT -5 raangoli said:

Sept 14, 2016 12:14:21 GMT -5 DesertMoon said:

You told me that! My friend Lydia said the same! She's like if I don't come back 100% Jordanian I will be devestated. I can understand that perspective.

I am always curious about these since I would assume that I'd come back as 100% Indian. But then what if I don't? Who the hell is going to explain that? In elementary school we had to do family trees and I got  as far as maybe my great grandparents. After that my parents were like, "meh, who knows, no one told us".

Our family tree is really hazy. I have exactly one great-grandparent whom we know for sure was born in Spain. Beyond that, no one is sure if any of my other great-grandparents emigrated to Cuba from elsewhere or if they had been on the island for generations and generations. The only thing I know for sure is that no one I am related to was tracking that kind of stuff 100 years ago, so I am definitely not descended from any Bacardis or families known for their participation in the Spanish-American war or anything like that. 

My brother did the DNA test and I'm interested to take a good look at the percentages sometime. We don't live near each other and every time I talk to him, he doesn't have the detailed results in front of him.
 

[raangoli]

anna7602, I hope you do get to review your brother's report sometime. I am sure it would be interesting to see. And I agree that no one was tracking this sort of stuff generations ago and so that's why I could only go so far.

It reminds me of a coworker who wanted to trace his family tree but was finding it difficult because he is from Brazil and he said his family didn't keep these types of records. Whereas he married someone from Belgium and she was going back many, many generations. It was so interesting to me.