How are we doing? BLM-Related

[newnamesameperson]

I attempted to have a conversation with someone about this yesterday, she told me how we must teach our children not to live in fear. LOFL and when I tried to get her to step outside her EXTREMELY privileged (race/wealth) reality she was offended by ME.

I swear liberals are just as bad as conservatives.

[mujerchingona]

I saw the news about the recent shooting before going to bed last night.  Restless sleep.  I woke up with a pain in my heart and a panicked sense of urgency to DO something.  I'm tired (that word seems to diminish what I feel but don't know what else to use) that this continues to happen.  That we have the same dialogues time and time again and nothing changes.  I posted something on FB hoping to move the dialogue forward....and crickets.  Not one like.  Not one comment.  I made the mistake of trying to update my cover photo later this morning.  Every time someone likes that photo my rage builds and builds.  I've tried to remove it from my timeline but apparently people can still see and comment.  It's making me want to hulk smash.  That you can comment on a cute pic of my daughters but radio silence on my serious post just below.  RAGE.  I'm tired.  Tired of the sadness.  Tired of the anger.  Tired of the fear.  Tired of the silence and complacency.  I don't want any of it anymore.  I want change! gahhhhh

[Black Lavender]

Sept 20, 2016 19:13:52 GMT -5 sfy said:

Sept 20, 2016 18:18:55 GMT -5 Black Lavender said:

I'm tired, disheartened and everything else. I feel like we're trapped in a country that wants us dead. I feel like I'm surrounded by closet racists. Our kids cheer, dance, go to school and play soccer together and I'm giving all of them side eye. I'm tired of all of the lawn signs that says "We Support our Police". I want to rip all of them out of the ground and burn them. I want to surround myself with nothing but people of color and pretend like we're the only ones who exist. I'm just tired of being upset, crying, and arguing on Facebook. The people that get it understand and the people that don't never will.

My sister was just telling me that most of her neighbors have these! Wtf. Never seen or heard of these. Hope not to see them because tbh, they would piss me off maybe 2 notches less than a Confederate flag. Because I know what it means. It's coded language at this point. It's aka Blue Lives Matter. She's in your area, I wonder if this is regional.

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[barcelonagirl]

I spent the morning playing NWA. And feeling mad uncomfortable in my usual haunts. I also asked my husband to shave his beard (he's indian) so that he won't be mistaken for a terrorist.

It's been fun.

[sfy]

Sept 21, 2016 18:10:44 GMT -5 Black Lavender said:

Sept 20, 2016 19:13:52 GMT -5 sfy said:

My sister was just telling me that most of her neighbors have these! Wtf. Never seen or heard of these. Hope not to see them because tbh, they would piss me off maybe 2 notches less than a Confederate flag. Because I know what it means. It's coded language at this point. It's aka Blue Lives Matter. She's in your area, I wonder if this is regional.

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[imobviouslystaying]

Sept 20, 2016 19:13:52 GMT -5 sfy said:

Sept 20, 2016 18:18:55 GMT -5 Black Lavender said:

I'm tired, disheartened and everything else. I feel like we're trapped in a country that wants us dead. I feel like I'm surrounded by closet racists. Our kids cheer, dance, go to school and play soccer together and I'm giving all of them side eye. I'm tired of all of the lawn signs that says "We Support our Police". I want to rip all of them out of the ground and burn them. I want to surround myself with nothing but people of color and pretend like we're the only ones who exist. I'm just tired of being upset, crying, and arguing on Facebook. The people that get it understand and the people that don't never will.

My sister was just telling me that most of her neighbors have these! Wtf. Never seen or heard of these. Hope not to see them because tbh, they would piss me off maybe 2 notches less than a Confederate flag. Because I know what it means. It's coded language at this point. It's aka Blue Lives Matter. She's in your area, I wonder if this is regional.

There is a piece of property on my drive home where someone has erected a giant public park quality flag pole from which to fly the stars and bars. He even replaced that tattered piece of shit with a brand new vivid as fuck one a few months ago. And every now and then it looks like it's been tied up to make it more visible. Today, it was tired up again and now I'm wondering if this country ass mutherfucker doesn't do that every time something horrific happens.

Imma keep note.

[starlily]

Last night the 11pm news mentioned "another police shooting" as part of their lead-in, so I started telling H about Terrence Crutcher, but then horrifyingly realized the news was actually talking about Kevin Lamont Scott. Then I gave up on the day. It's ridiculous that we have so many police shootings that one can barely be talked about before the next one occurs.

Most of you know I'm a prosecutor. It frustrates me to no end that "Blue Lives Matter" and "All Lives Matter" are the default for the majority of my colleagues. Those few of us who dare to question the user of force are written off as "crazy liberals." I don't get it, because bad policing undermines our cases, period. When jurors don't trust the testimony of officers, then victims of crime often pay the price.

But then I think about the time our office actually did prosecute an officer for excessive force, which was clear on video and audio, and the jury STILL returned a not guilty verdict. And then I want to throw things at the wall. It shouldn't be this hard to hold officers accountable for their actions.

Sorry if this is rambling and disjointed. I know the system is broken, yet I'm part of the system. I know I do what I can to correct injustices, but it's disheartening that more of my colleagues won't even though they could. I just feel so disheartened.

[lovelyshoes]

starlily


"I know the system is broken, yet I'm part of the system. I know I do what I can to correct injustices, but it's disheartening that more of my colleagues won't even though they could."
Not only could, but Should! Ugh, it's their job! It's so frustrating, I don't know how you do it. I had to work with officers at an old job and it was the most frustrating thing trying to explain to them that I need nothing besides the actual truth from them. Banging head against the wall.

[threejs]

Is anyone watching the protests in Charlotte? I want to join them in burning shit down, and then I see the lines of police in riot gear and all the tear gas and I don't even know what to do with the pain and panic and fear.

[andwhat]

Welp. I got internet and TV a few hours ago. I am afraid to venture to FB and see what is being posted. I did manage to post an article about the Kaepernick haters being silent in the wake of these latest shootings. Lets see if one of the people who were speaking out against him have anything to say now. Doubt it.

[orangeblossom]

Sept 21, 2016 20:19:34 GMT -5 threejs said:

Is anyone watching the protests in Charlotte? I want to join them in burning shit down, and then I see the lines of police in riot gear and all the tear gas and I don't even know what to do with the pain and panic and fear.

I am off and on.  One person was shot and killed.  It was NOT police related.

[sfy]

Sept 21, 2016 19:19:24 GMT -5 imobviouslystaying said:

Sept 20, 2016 19:13:52 GMT -5 sfy said:

My sister was just telling me that most of her neighbors have these! Wtf. Never seen or heard of these. Hope not to see them because tbh, they would piss me off maybe 2 notches less than a Confederate flag. Because I know what it means. It's coded language at this point. It's aka Blue Lives Matter. She's in your area, I wonder if this is regional.

There is a piece of property on my drive home where someone has erected a giant public park quality flag pole from which to fly the stars and bars. He even replaced that tattered piece of shit with a brand new vivid as fuck one a few months ago. And every now and then it looks like it's been tied up to make it more visible. Today, it was tired up again and now I'm wondering if this country ass mutherfucker doesn't do that every time something horrific happens.

Imma keep note.

This is too much...and yet, not at all surprising to me.

[iammalcolmx]

Sept 22, 2016 6:57:50 GMT -5 capscapscaps said:

It's affecting my marriage. I've been increasingly distant from H and I don't know how to fix it. I'm angry at all od this bullshit over the past year but I know he won't understand why, and that makes me more angry.

It would impact mine as well. If H wasn't on my side about this, I don't know if I could be with him. We all are different so I don't judge your choices but I seriously don't think I could take it.

[threejs]

Sept 22, 2016 6:57:50 GMT -5 capscapscaps said:

It's affecting my marriage. I've been increasingly distant from H and I don't know how to fix it. I'm angry at all od this bullshit over the past year but I know he won't understand why, and that makes me more angry.

I'm sorry. I can only imagine how difficult this must be. I don't have any answers, but am sending virtual hugs and support.  

[itsme]

Sept 22, 2016 6:57:50 GMT -5 capscapscaps said:

It's affecting my marriage. I've been increasingly distant from H and I don't know how to fix it. I'm angry at all od this bullshit over the past year but I know he won't understand why, and that makes me more angry.

I'm sorry.

[kicks]

Sept 22, 2016 6:57:50 GMT -5 capscapscaps said:

It's affecting my marriage. I've been increasingly distant from H and I don't know how to fix it. I'm angry at all od this bullshit over the past year but I know he won't understand why, and that makes me more angry.

I'm so sorry. Although not the same I hope you know you can reach out to us and hope you have other support IRL.

[kicks]

It's somewhat hard and annoying to be at work. Especially with my co-interns. I think I was short with one this morning. He was so chipper and I just wasn't in the mood.

2 of my MA's are black but I'm only in the outpatient office once a week. Other than that the only people of color I see are some patients, but none of my colleagues.

My boyfriend is traveling of course, we haven't really talked about it because it seems kind of pointless, but I just want to give him a hug.

[sweetday]

Its weird at work.

I'm one of only a handful of minorities. Only one other WOC has ever spoken about it here. She did it at a department meeting and I was just applauding her from my desk. Emailed her and spoke to her afterward.

I'm also in the land of more than a few Trump supporters so its probably best that we dont discuss anything that will get me fired.

[iammalcolmx]

Sept 22, 2016 10:40:00 GMT -5 sweetday said:

Its weird at work.

I'm one of only a handful of minorities. Only one other WOC has ever spoken about it here. She did it at a department meeting and I was just applauding her from my desk. Emailed her and spoke to her afterward.

I'm also in the land of more than a few Trump supporters so its probably best that we dont discuss anything that will get me fired.

I am on HIGH ALERT for one of those rednecks to come at me the wrong fucking way. I will go out in a blaze of glory!

[sfy]

orangeblossom and @barefootbarista, how are you guys doing today?

My friend in Charlotte said she was not allowed to go in to work today.

[NinaSimone]

All of this is pissing me off and making me sad in so many different ways. I just had to school my closest co-worker on everything that's going on. At first she tried to defend the police/victim blame, talking about records and crap, then I had to point out how this has been happening for years, from babies (because to me a 12 y/o is still a baby) to grown men and it isn't changing or getting better. I told her she better pay attention to what's happening, she's Asian and this will affect all minorities in one way or another.

I brought up moving out of the country to H and he just isn't seeing the dangers that our kids will face as strongly as I am. He thinks because he's light skinned and has a charming personality that he will be fine. He didn't say that at all but I know that's his view, he's always gotten by on his looks. I'm trying to help him see that that shit don't matter and our babies are BROWN.

[sfy]

Sept 22, 2016 11:36:24 GMT -5 NinaSimone said:

All of this is pissing me off and making me sad in so many different ways. I just had to school my closest co-worker on everything that's going on. At first she tried to defend the police/victim blame, talking about records and crap, then I had to point out how this has been happening for years, from babies (because to me a 12 y/o is still a baby) to grown men and it isn't changing or getting better. I told her she better pay attention to what's happening, she's Asian and this will affect all minorities in one way or another.

I brought up moving out of the country to H and he just isn't seeing the dangers that our kids will face as strongly as I am. He thinks because he's light skinned and has a charming personality that he will be fine. He didn't say that at all but I know that's his view, he's always gotten by on his looks. I'm trying to help him see that that shit don't matter and our babies are BROWN.

Lord.  Chile.  I mean.  Do say what, now?  Honey.  Does he know...forget it, I'm actually speechless.
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[newnamesameperson]

Sept 22, 2016 11:40:23 GMT -5 sfy said:

Sept 22, 2016 11:36:24 GMT -5 NinaSimone said:

All of this is pissing me off and making me sad in so many different ways. I just had to school my closest co-worker on everything that's going on. At first she tried to defend the police/victim blame, talking about records and crap, then I had to point out how this has been happening for years, from babies (because to me a 12 y/o is still a baby) to grown men and it isn't changing or getting better. I told her she better pay attention to what's happening, she's Asian and this will affect all minorities in one way or another.

I brought up moving out of the country to H and he just isn't seeing the dangers that our kids will face as strongly as I am. He thinks because he's light skinned and has a charming personality that he will be fine. He didn't say that at all but I know that's his view, he's always gotten by on his looks. I'm trying to help him see that that shit don't matter and our babies are BROWN.

Lord.  Chile.  I mean.  Do say what, now?  Honey.  Does he know...forget it, I'm actually speechless.
Save

What does this mean?  I don't understand the he thinks he's light skinned so he will be fine.  I'm really confused. 

[NinaSimone]

Sept 22, 2016 11:40:23 GMT -5 sfy said:

Sept 22, 2016 11:36:24 GMT -5 NinaSimone said:

All of this is pissing me off and making me sad in so many different ways. I just had to school my closest co-worker on everything that's going on. At first she tried to defend the police/victim blame, talking about records and crap, then I had to point out how this has been happening for years, from babies (because to me a 12 y/o is still a baby) to grown men and it isn't changing or getting better. I told her she better pay attention to what's happening, she's Asian and this will affect all minorities in one way or another.

I brought up moving out of the country to H and he just isn't seeing the dangers that our kids will face as strongly as I am. He thinks because he's light skinned and has a charming personality that he will be fine. He didn't say that at all but I know that's his view, he's always gotten by on his looks. I'm trying to help him see that that shit don't matter and our babies are BROWN.

Lord.  Chile.  I mean.  Do say what, now?  Honey.  Does he know...forget it, I'm actually speechless.
Save

I KNOW!!! I told him he won't even get to the point of charming them since they shoot first and ask questions later. Being light brown doesn't make you any less brown or scary to them, don't be fooled.

[newnamesameperson]

Sept 22, 2016 11:45:38 GMT -5 NinaSimone said:

Sept 22, 2016 11:40:23 GMT -5 sfy said:

Lord.  Chile.  I mean.  Do say what, now?  Honey.  Does he know...forget it, I'm actually speechless.
Save

I KNOW!!! I told him he won't even get to the point of charming them since they shoot first and ask questions later. Being light brown doesn't make you any less brown or scary to them, don't be fooled.

This reminds me of how I used to think years and years ago.  That people saw my personality before my skin color....I'm surprised he still thinks this way.  

[kicks]

Sept 22, 2016 11:36:24 GMT -5 NinaSimone said:

All of this is pissing me off and making me sad in so many different ways. I just had to school my closest co-worker on everything that's going on. At first she tried to defend the police/victim blame, talking about records and crap, then I had to point out how this has been happening for years, from babies (because to me a 12 y/o is still a baby) to grown men and it isn't changing or getting better. I told her she better pay attention to what's happening, she's Asian and this will affect all minorities in one way or another.

I brought up moving out of the country to H and he just isn't seeing the dangers that our kids will face as strongly as I am. He thinks because he's light skinned and has a charming personality that he will be fine. He didn't say that at all but I know that's his view, he's always gotten by on his looks. I'm trying to help him see that that shit don't matter and our babies are BROWN.

Yes I hate the victim blaming. And this morning the news reporters were talking about hopefully the Chatlotte police release the video tape soon and hopefully that'll show that the shooting was justified.

My thought was no, fuck no, this isn't just about this one incident. People keeping missing the damn point.

Same with Terrence Crutcher. People seem to be focused on whether or not his one hand was up right at the moment he wAs shot.

Umm what about why the fuck did the police roll up on him with guns drawn for minding his own damn business? Simply because he was a black male....systematic racism, let's talk about that instead.

[itsme]

I have been thinking about current events a lot lately and mentioned to an online group how it's weighing heavily on my mind. So far there's crickets on that subject and talk about random mundane unimportant things. The group is 99.9% white.

[redwino]

I've basically called in Black the last two days. I've come into work but they can't make me be productive. The
He only thing that got me through yesterday was going to a predominantly black school. Most students and staff are black and I was able to rant freely during lunch with some teachers.

Everyday for at least 5 years I have kissed my husband goodbye and told him to be careful. Everyday for at least 5 years he has said "you know ain't nothing going to happen to me". Yesterday his response was "I'll try". I about lost it.

[NinaSimone]

Sept 22, 2016 11:52:16 GMT -5 newnamesameperson said:

Sept 22, 2016 11:45:38 GMT -5 NinaSimone said:

I KNOW!!! I told him he won't even get to the point of charming them since they shoot first and ask questions later. Being light brown doesn't make you any less brown or scary to them, don't be fooled.

This reminds me of how I used to think years and years ago.  That people saw my personality before my skin color....I'm surprised he still thinks this way.  

I'm surprised too, but it has never NOT worked for him.

[itsme]

Sept 22, 2016 12:10:26 GMT -5 redwino said:

I've basically called in Black the last two days. I've come into work but they can't make me be productive. The
He only thing that got me through yesterday was going to a predominantly black school. Most students and staff are black and I was able to rant freely during lunch with some teachers.

Everyday for at least 5 years I have kissed my husband goodbye and told him to be careful. Everyday for at least 5 years he has said "you know ain't nothing going to happen to me". Yesterday his response was "I'll try". I about lost it.

That right there.  That brings tears to my eyes.