Thanks for the glowing performance review. I mean... seriously glowing. Pretty sure I need to print out a copy to read whenever I'm feeling down about anything. Now for you to tell me that it's going to translate into an at least meager bonus, that would make things better.
Signed, The person who would like a GREAT bonus in connection with a GREAT review, but realizes that our division didn't even come close to kind of meeting our goals.
Shit or get off the pot. If I need to start planning a whole home renovation, I'd like to get on it. And if I need to start looking at other houses, I'd like to get on that too.
Signed, The person who is no longer falling in love with houses and just wants quick answers, even if it's not a yes.
Dear Work, I’m overwhelmed. I’m so overwhelmed I can’t even articulate it. I’m dropping the kids at 7AM and working until 5-6 then catching up more after they are down. It doesn’t even help. And hiring someone? Takes months and THEN I have to onboard them and they STILL might suck. I want to go take a nap. For real. Anxiety max reached. Working Mom
Dear boss, Totally honored that the exec team wants to give me MORE responsibility. And the stuff you want to hand over does sound really fun. But let's remember, I'm a team of 2 full time, 2 part time people. We are already strapped for resources, so hiring more help has to be part of the bargain. Also, I'm still kind of confused about why these new projects would fall under my management, not the team that's been handling it. Couldn't they hire the additional resources instead of me? Is it because you just have more faith in me? Because that's cool. But it's still kind of weird. Thanks for the vote of confidence though! Puzzled Manager PS - This better mean a great raise!
Dear DH, You took yesterday off because you and DD2 were sick. So why did you feel the need to rush around and do a bunch of errands? Now you are still sick, didn't take a day to rest, and are going to feel terrible even longer. Staying up until midnight for no reason probably didn't help your body heal either. I will support you when you're sick, IF you will be responsible about your health. Otherwise, no sympathy. Signed, Annoyed
How do some people keep their jobs, much less have management positions when they spend their time critiquing others, stirring things up, over thinking, wasting time. Plus doing exactly what they complain about in others Xs 10. I have no faith in any upper management who cannot see or refuse to see this.
Post by erinshelley21 on Feb 21, 2018 11:48:18 GMT -5
Dear village, Life without you would be next to impossible. Thank you for helping me with my kids and life while I'm sick and DH is away. Love, forever grateful.
Dear immune system, You've had the entire cold and flu season to wimp out, so why did you pick 3 days before DH went on a 7 day long work trip to finally take a dive? I had every intention of kicking this week's ass but instead I'm just now feeling like a normal living human. Signed, don't do it again.
Dear brother, I love you and I am probably going to miss seeing you everyday since I have a sneaking suspicion it's going to be all on me to make sure we continue to see each other, but I am glad our days of working together are almost over. I'm amazed that we have lasted as long as we have since we are total f'ing opposites on most things. You are also exhausting. You don't have to play devil's advocate 100% of the time and when you question every single thing I say it's really annoying. Especially when you asked me last week if I'm open to answering your questions even after I've phased completely out and am probably working somewhere else. I'm going to do it because I'm not a jerk, but you need to get your feet set dude because I'm almost at my limit here. Love, your big sister who can't wait to just be your sister
Thanks for watching DD1 yesterday for the snow day but can we cut down on the junk you feed her? This is the second time she threw up after being at your house.
My five year old doesn't need any more cookies or candy
Dear Auditor,
If you don't know what an ACH payment is, you really probably shouldn't be asking me any accounting questions. Signed, No time for these questions
None of us wanted to get up today. Not me or the kids. I blame it on basketball last night or the fact we stayed up too late. DD yelled at me because she had a nightmare, and I wasn't in my room at 9 pm. I did tell her she could yell downstairs as she has done for many years. Everyone is tired.
Dear husband,
I don't know why we can't figure this money stuff out despite intense tracking, discussing etc. I think its a combination of your shopping and eating out, and all the medical bills. You've made a lot of money mistakes, but claim to be this smart MBA guy about finances. After a few more months of counseling, I may ask you if we can do a joint session on it or several. In the meantime, we have a decision to make on something, and I don't know what to decide because even if I say OK we can do this if you cut back on shopping, you may not cut back on shopping.... You agree to things and then don't do them. I keep trying to move forward, and you keep saying well you are spending money on medical bills, so I can shop. I don't think those are the same things at all. I am saving $800 a month by switching from daycare to preschool + aftercare, and I don't know where that money is going. Although we are investing a lot for retirement and college, so that's good, but I can't touch retirement money right now. I just feel like our budget/ balance with money is still off. It's still not where I want it to be.
Dear work, I generally like you, but you do get on my nerves. Thankfully my life is much better without crazy co-worker. She liked to have cozy fireside chats (no fireplace, but you get what I mean). Like she traps you into chats, and there are only so many times I can say I am getting back to work. And plus also don't interrupt me and keep me from WP.
Der Carpet Cleaners & Management Please get your but here and shampoo or so whatever you need to do so I can go back to working. Signed Frustrated Accountant
Dear WPs DH basically told me last night picking DD up after work is too hard and he just wants to come home and do his own thing. I told him tuff luck that he had to man up.
PS: To make things easier I told him just to feed her dinner and I will do the rest when I get home so he can have all the "me time" he needs. Stressed out me
Dear DD For the next 8 weeks can you please not give me a hard time about quick showers and reading. We can start counting down on your calendar and I promise you a girls weekend away just you me and the dog after tax season. Mommy
186momx, I don't mean this to sound mean, but what does your DH bring to the table? I know we use this place to vent, but I am curious.
Dear PM,
I understand our customer is in the building this week and you want to show off. However, giving us an impossible task with an impossible deadline and then to continue changing what you want is not cool.
Signed
Worker bee since 7 and just now pausing for air.
Dear new guy,
screaming at someone because they are critiquing is not okay. I don't care if you have 18 years of experience. You don't have 18 years at our company with our equipment. You are much older starting at an entry level position. I don't think you are as smart as you think you are. Also too bad everyone here is younger than you and has more experience than you. I repeat that you are at entry level.
waverly, Is your husband open to getting an allowance? Then he can spend without you "nagging" him about it but it's not going to hurt your household budget. I'd be trying to set that kind of limit with him, rather than just trusting that he won't spend.
And this is coming from the spender in my marriage. I need hard lines and an allowance. I don't mean to overspend, but it just kind of happens. An allowance has actually really helped our marriage and our finances.
waverly - I could write your post on finances. Except trade “student loans” for “medical bills”. With DH I think it’s the consultant expense report habits - he forgets he’s spending our money on weekends.
waverly , Is your husband open to getting an allowance? Then he can spend without you "nagging" him about it but it's not going to hurt your household budget. I'd be trying to set that kind of limit with him, rather than just trusting that he won't spend.
And this is coming from the spender in my marriage. I need hard lines and an allowance. I don't mean to overspend, but it just kind of happens. An allowance has actually really helped our marriage and our finances.
I've tried all different things, and he wasn't open to many of them. I did get him to get a tax attorney and tax preparer, since he messed up our taxes several years back. And he did change from Money Dance to Quicken and added Quicken to my phone etc. so we could be on the same system.
He is trying to pay off debt, but I feel like we just keep putting more money on CC because of medical bills and his spending. When I ask him should we cut back or switch different services to save money he says no. I keep trying to save money, and I just feel like its not working. I mean I guess since we started an emergency fund (got him to finally agree to that), and are investing more we are, but the debt seems like it gets better and then it gets back to where it was before.
I tried getting him to do the envelope system or an allowance or separate bank accounts for fun verus bills, and none of them seemed to work/ float. We have made progress just not in the main area that I wanted to make progress, and I am impatient.
waverly , Is your husband open to getting an allowance? Then he can spend without you "nagging" him about it but it's not going to hurt your household budget. I'd be trying to set that kind of limit with him, rather than just trusting that he won't spend.
And this is coming from the spender in my marriage. I need hard lines and an allowance. I don't mean to overspend, but it just kind of happens. An allowance has actually really helped our marriage and our finances.
We call it "mad money" so it doesn't seem like it's so maternal/paternal. And I get some also...even though he's the one who historically has had the problem. I agree, it makes spending on myself and him spending on himself a lot less stressful for everyone.
I suppose I could try again and label it mad money. What are your monthly limits? Does it include eating out since he loves loves to eat out, and with 3 or 4 of us going out it adds up?
waverly - this isn’t honest, but I transfer extra money to savings every month. DH doesn’t look at the details (if he did he would see the note is “curtail spending cushion”). He does check the balance and it helps him back pedal from things like lunch at Seasons 52 between soccer games 🙄
waverly , Ours is very strict, because we've been so tight with our budget up until recently. We have a weekly auto transfer of $200 to a separate account that covers everything that is not a line item in our budget. So yes, eating out is a part of that. If we don't have the cash to eat out because that week's budget got used up on other random expenses that popped up, that's life. We don't have eating out as a budget line item, since it's a splurge to us, not a regular thing. I think you'd have to decide on what works best for you - is eating out important enough to become a budget item with a limit, or is it something you do when you can afford it with your fun money?
ETA - Just want to clarify that this is not $200 a week of straight fun money... We use it for things like copays for appointments, random field trips or school expenses, etc... The "unpredictable" expenses that we can't put on a spreadsheet plus fun stuff like buying a coffee or lunch at work, or going out to eat as a family all comes out of that pool.
Oh, and we do ours weekly because I suck at spending and would blow through the monthly budget and leave us scrambling during the last week of every month. I need to see that balance drop in real time with no cushion.
2chatter , this is one of the things I do too. Most of our money is stored outside of our checking and earmarked for various purposes. Money comes into our checking account and I move small amounts weekly to the external accounts.
If DH wants to know how much cash we have, he asks how much is in checkings. He knows we have other accounts, but he bases it off that.
waverly , I think I recall you saying something about trying to keep him equally involved with your financial management, but since he can't/won't take a proper approach, perhaps force him out it?
waverly - this isn’t honest, but I transfer extra money to savings every month. DH doesn’t look at the details (if he did he would see the note is “curtail spending cushion”). He does check the balance and it helps him back pedal from things like lunch at Seasons 52 between soccer games 🙄
Unfortunately, H would definitely notice this. Bummer.
waverly , Ours is very strict, because we've been so tight with our budget up until recently. We have a weekly auto transfer of $200 to a separate account that covers everything that is not a line item in our budget. So yes, eating out is a part of that. If we don't have the cash to eat out because that week's budget got used up on other random expenses that popped up, that's life. We don't have eating out as a budget line item, since it's a splurge to us, not a regular thing. I think you'd have to decide on what works best for you - is eating out important enough to become a budget item with a limit, or is it something you do when you can afford it with your fun money?
Thanks for the info. Eating out is definitely important to him, but I would rather he curb it.
2chatter , this is one of the things I do too. Most of our money is stored outside of our checking and earmarked for various purposes. Money comes into our checking account and I move small amounts weekly to the external accounts.
If DH wants to know how much cash we have, he asks how much is in checkings. He knows we have other accounts, but he bases it off that.
waverly , I think I recall you saying something about trying to keep him equally involved with your financial management, but since he can't/won't take a proper approach, perhaps force him out it?
He manages the finances. We both got on the same tool. But I don't know what to do to force the issue more which is why I was thinking of talking together with his counselor. He brought up with her too that he makes good money, but we just never seem to have money. It comes and goes or we bleed money. I think that a therapist or financial counselor that specializes in couples getting to the same page would be helpful. We do have a financial advisor that backs me up, so that is helpful but he is for investments not every day budgeting.
Post by mustardseed2007 on Feb 21, 2018 13:44:10 GMT -5
Dear DS,
When you go to spend the day at the potential new school tomorrow, just be yourself because your normal self is above-average awesome in so many ways.
Hugs, Mom of a cool boy
Dear DD,
You are breaking my heart at drop offs. I miss you and am so glad I'm doing pick up today. I'm looking forward to hanging out with you after work.
Hugs, Mom of a sweet girl
Dear Coach of Baseball Team,
I am very impressed by your email - you sound very organized. Not so impressed by twice a week practices but I'm trying to get my head right. So glad to be on your team with one of our nice neighbors. And so glad to have practice days that don't conflict with Karate since that's DS' favorite thing ever.
Post by sandandsea on Feb 21, 2018 13:45:02 GMT -5
Dear Wednesday, Please be over so I can head to Tahoe for PTO and let work be someone else’s problem for a couple of days.
Dear coworker, Yes we are friends and I help you, however I hate you relying on me to finish up your sloppy work you submit to me for review. You’re single and working less than me which means I’m like a billion times busier than you. Do your share.
Post by mustardseed2007 on Feb 21, 2018 13:47:28 GMT -5
waverly, for us it doesn't include eating out. We both bring our lunches to work, though, so eating out is normally done together one the weekends. It's a separate line item on our theoretical budget.
The amount has varied according to our financial picture at the time. I think when we were paying off debt it was 50 each? But as our income grew and we paid off all of our non-mortgage debt it went up. Right now it's 150 each. When we were paying off debt we wouldn't have been able to afford that much frivolous spending, though.
Post by traveltheworld on Feb 21, 2018 13:59:33 GMT -5
Dear Work,
Even though I'm super annoyed that I had to work every day while on vacation, I'm still grateful that you pay so well that we could all take an expensive vacation like that. Watching my 70 year old Dad and 5 year old DS zipline together through a ring of fire will be a memory I'll remember forever.
Signed, Grateful employee
Dear External Counsels,
Trust me, I'll remember those of you who tried to shield me as much as possible so that I can actually enjoy my vacation with my family. It will not go unnoticed.
Internal counsel who gets to control work allocation
Dear DS,
You are so amazing. I can't believe what a joyous child you've turned into. You made friends with kids at the pool, you tried every adventure activity, and you took care of your little sister.
Post by mustardseed2007 on Feb 21, 2018 15:15:30 GMT -5
Dear Self,
How can you read something, and then come back and read it the next day and get something totally different out of it the 2nd day? Title reviews are really tricky when you read like that.