k3am, thought it was worth a shot. I'm in HCOL (not quite where you are, but pretty close), and 2 kids in daycare at a nice center = nanny around here. We could have had some savings if we went daycare with one kid, but then there would have been all of my medical expenses from the loony bin, as I would have been charged with drop off and pick up every day. Once we had the second, it was totally worth it to have the nanny.
librarychica that’s awesome. My parents did the spreadsheets and long debates for a couple years and finally bought a 2br/2ba condo in Clearwater about two years ago. They love it. I love it. Of course they don’t have small kids...
Our aftercare sounds just like everyone else’s but it was a shitshow for DD. We took her out at the beginning of this calendar year and hired a high schooler to pick her up and play with her from 3-530ish. It’s way more expensive but totally worth it to me. Our aftercare teachers seem unable to understand that you can’t have the same expectations of the kindergarteners that you have of the 4th/5th graders. I’ve had conversations with two other parents of K kids in the last few weeks who are considering pulling their kids too.
I’ll likely send her back in 3rd or 4th grade but we’re all in for another high school babysitter next year in 1st.
librarychica I feel like every article I read lately is about couples deciding to telecommute and live either on vacation destinations or travel the world with their family.
Childcare costs are insane. I spend over $50k a year and somehow still want a fourth kid - I realize I’m insane and and incredibly lucky to still be able to have shelter and food while spending that much on childcare.
My health is heading in the right direction. My HCG levels (and indicator of the disease progression) keep on halving each week, I’ve stopped heavy bleeding, and my hemoglobin levels have stabilized. My doctor has decided I don’t need to see her each time I go for my weekly treatment, so that will shave an hour off what is now a 3 hour process. Other than being tired, I haven’t been having any side effects. I’m just pissed that I’m not pregnant and I can’t drink for the next couple months.
Our before and after school is in three portables. After school is split between kinder, 1-2 grade, 3-5 grade but after 4:30-5ish they are all together until 6. Waking in on a Friday when ds was in pre-K at a dc was shocking. Such little oversight, big age gaps, high ratios, screen time was so surprising. But it’s actually worked well. Ds needs structure and rules and outdoor time. They provide that but also give him flexibility to do word searches instead of homework, play games with other kids, and eat/make snacks. The other kids have exposed ds to things I’d rather him not do (nothing really awful but things like saying stupid, speaking with a bad attitude, mimicking/disrespectful words, etc).
They do some cool projects too like science experiments, planting things, making slime, etc.
It’s crazy at first but seems to work. There is a more academic option on campus that we are trying next year.
Kids are stupid expensive. We all could be well rested and living the high life if we didn't have kids.
Amen. I should not feel like I'm suddenly a millionaire because my kids will be in first grade next year. But I do. We've been counting down to this day since they were born.
librarychica I feel like every article I read lately is about couples deciding to telecommute and live either on vacation destinations or travel the world with their family.
Childcare costs are insane. I spend over $50k a year and somehow still want a fourth kid - I realize I’m insane and and incredibly lucky to still be able to have shelter and food while spending that much on childcare.
There’s a family like that in one of the buildings we stay at. They have 5 kids and travel the world homeschooling and managing rentals.
We are not those people, lol. H has telecommuted for well over 10 years and we would like for me to eventually have the flexibility to travel more but I think the odds of us moving to the beach full time before the kids are in college are pretty slim. Ideally, we would be able to get two vacation rentals and the income from those plus the in-town rental we are keeping would enable me to leave my job and manage them full time. Live at the beach during school breaks and in town during the school year. It’s a dream! But now it’s a dream with spreadsheets.
Next summer I hope to rent a beach property for a month with the kids. DH can fly in and out from there. I’ll take a week off, Work during the day the other three weeks. All three should be swimmers and bike riders and can hit the pool, ice cream, etc under DD’s supervision. Can do surf camp, SUP lessons, local sports camps etc instead of camps here to keep them busy. Fingers crossed this happens.
Next summer I hope to rent a beach property for a month with the kids. DH can fly in and out from there. I’ll take a week off, Work during the day the other three weeks. All three should be swimmers and bike riders and can hit the pool, ice cream, etc under DD’s supervision. Can do surf camp, SUP lessons, local sports camps etc instead of camps here to keep them busy. Fingers crossed this happens.
I think I read this in a Babysitters Club book once and it stuck with me and became my life goal.
If you end up at a Florida beach, drop me a line. ;-)
Next summer I hope to rent a beach property for a month with the kids. DH can fly in and out from there. I’ll take a week off, Work during the day the other three weeks. All three should be swimmers and bike riders and can hit the pool, ice cream, etc under DD’s supervision. Can do surf camp, SUP lessons, local sports camps etc instead of camps here to keep them busy. Fingers crossed this happens.
This is kind of my dream too. When the kids go away to theater camp with DH, I want to go with them and WFH instead of staying home alone and missing out on the fun for a couple weeks. I think *maybe* next year I could finally have enough tenure here to ask for it.
Telecommuting isn’t an option for my job, but H does and we have talked about next summer getting a place for the month and inviting his parents for two weeks and mine for two weeks to keep an eye on the girls. He can work during the day, I’ll drive in on Friday night and out Sunday night and take a week off sometime in there. The only question is whether his dad would actually let him get any work done!
I’m glad I am not the only one with this dream although mine is more like take two months vacation every summer and live at my family’s lake house. Which actually the lake house is boring so I probably won’t last nearly long. But dreams are different from reality.
Post by freezorburn on May 4, 2018 12:03:32 GMT -5
k3am - I'm in an HCOL are but things are all wonky here thx to Amazon. (It's more complicated than that, but it's convenient to blame Amazon).
There are two (expensive, and with limited slots) private companies that run aftercare at our school, as well as enrichment classes organized by the PTA. The enrichment classes typically only go until 3:30 or 4:00 pm, so it's still not enough coverage for parents working full time, unless they have a flexible schedule. But the nice thing about those is that they are funded so that each kid at school can take one class for free.
As an incoming kindergarten parent, I was clueless and didn't realize that the private aftercare slots fill up in February before the next school year. So, we ended up with the nonprofit option that had plenty of room -- the Boys and Girls Club. We paid $50 to register for the year and it's $100 a month for drop-in. He goes 3 afternoons a week, but the cost would be the same if he went all 5. Also, it's awesome. They've accommodated DS working with his behavioral therapist during his time there. He gets to burn off energy and do arts and crafts and all kinds of things that they don't have time for in school. Older grades get homework help and there are teen programs. It's just enough organized chaos to challenge him where he needs to work on social skills, and can feel supported at the same time.
Can't say how awesome it is to have a low-cost, high-quality program as an option. I'm still recovering from divorce -- have been able to stay in our home, but still adjusting to the drop in household income and the hit my career took from taking time off to care of DS. It's such a relief when the pieces of the puzzle drop into place.
DH thinks taking a job in another state makes some kind of sense. He’d get to work from home when he’s in our state. But - apartment in other state. And flights. And meals there, no expense account.
If conflicts with his noncompete.
I think he’s either lost his mind or has a secret second family, because that makes zero sense.
Oh, and he should be home tonight if his new flight isn’t further delayed so at least there’s that.
I don’t know if we need a therapist, lawyer or PI - but I’m over even needing to think one of those needs to be in play.
I still haven't heard from the private school yet. The last email I received was that the admissions committee was meeting at some point this week to discuss all potential candidates. I think that this is not boding well for us. I honestly don't know what to do. I've had a little communication with our second choice, and it has been so haphazard and disorganized. I'm really not excited about it anymore. I don't want to take DD1 out of one bad situation and stick her into a mediocre one. I'd just really hoped this would be settled by now.
I took my oldest to kindergarten orientation on Friday. She isn’t going to our neighborhood school so we don’t know anyone to get the lowdown about how lunches, drop-offs, picks-ups etc. work so I’m getting nervous. That combined with sitting in traffic for 50 minutes on my way to drop her off Friday has me really second guessing our decision to send her to the Montessori school instead of the one in our neighborhood.
kimberlybb - we did an hour or so commute for Montessori for less than a year. The nice thing about public school is you can always change your mind and enroll mid year or next year or any time. We loooooved the Montessori but it was just too much to pull it off. I’m glad we did it for the time we did, as it pulled DD out of her shell and she really learned focus there.
kimberlybb, that is similar to the commute I did the first 2 years DD was in (Montessori) elementary. Not gonna lie; it was rough. We moved last year because we loved the school and felt committed to it after that amount of time. Now we are 10 min from school, but I am still far from work. (My work is not near school OR our old neighborhood so my commute is better now, just not great).