Pregnant 6th grader

[roadbananas]

My mother used to teach home ec, caring for babies, etc to jr. High and high school girls.part of a program the city school system offered She had an 11 yr old at the Youngest. A handful of the older girls had more than one child.

It was sad. But they did learn a lot from her.

I do recall one girl, she was 16 i think, her baby was born very early and once the child was able to go home they had to have the baby on oxygen. She and her boyfriend were always together with that baby. I dont know whatevr happened to the baby, but despite her age, it was nice to see her and her boyfeiend so involved and together for all of it.

[imoan]

My BFF is a teacher. I remember the day she found out that one of her ELEVEN YEAR OLD students was ku. And yes, same situation... parents were psyched, school threw her a shower. INSANE!

[MWOS]

Sept 19, 2012 9:55:22 GMT -5 imoan said:

My BFF is a teacher. I remember the day she found out that one of her ELEVEN YEAR OLD students was ku. And yes, same situation... parents were psyched, school threw her a shower. INSANE!

wut :-|

[sewf]

My cousin had his first at 14. And let me tell you, it was HARD. They raised the baby and she's a fantastic kid (when she's not too influenced by her druggie mother). My cousin is doing ok now at 24, but the last 10 years were the hardest I've ever seen someone struggle. Luckily he finally dumped his daughter's mom a couple of years ago, so that helped.

God, I'm terrified about having a child now at 27. I can't imagine going through this at 12!

[Mrs.Beagle]

This entire post is so sad and disturbing. WHO THE FUCK THINKS THIS IS OKAY?

[vicky]

The scariest thing about this is, at least in NYS, once the kid has the baby she's no longer considered a minor. She technically can make all decisions for herself and the baby. Mom and Dad no longer have any say in her life whatsoever.

I can't imagine the "well-informed" decisions I would have made as a 12 y/o.

[Deleted]

It's still baffling to me that we can make sex just a mystical thing to kids in this country but violence abounds. My aunt actually said about her 9 yr old that she doesn't care how much violence there is in a movie/game/etc., she just doesn't want to approach the s-e-x topic yet I mean, there's discretion and there's repression -- and I feel too often here we opt for repression.

[CurlyQ284]

When I was in 8th grade choir, my assigned seat was between two popular girls who would talk over me. Girl A was sleeing with a high school freshman, mostly in public places. In 9th grade I had advanced French with 10th graders and one girl asked me if I knew A. I said yes and she told me that her boyfriend was that guy. He got the sophomore pregnant and once he found out he started cheating.with A. He was with A on the day sophomore got her abortion. Everyone in the scenario was 13-15.

[Deleted]

Omg

I actually can't believe that kids even think about sex at 11/12 years old. I swear to god, I was dressing up as Queen Amidala in my spare time and hoping the spice girls would ask me to be in their band. I didn't even kiss until I was 15!

[Jermys]

I would be devastated if my 12 year old was having sex, much less knocked up. I wonder if anyone still sells chastity belts?

[flamingeaux]

I used to work with an 18 year old that was pregnant with her fourth kid. She had only had her period like 5 times in her whole life. We finally talked her into getting the BC shot.

[mojo]

Sept 19, 2012 9:55:22 GMT -5 imoan said:

My BFF is a teacher. I remember the day she found out that one of her ELEVEN YEAR OLD students was ku. And yes, same situation... parents were psyched, school threw her a shower. INSANE!

:-| I can't comprehend this. The school threw her a shower!?

I just... can't. It makes me so sad!

[Deleted]

This is normal to me I guess. I grew up in a town with one of the highest teen pregnancy rates in the US. A lot of people dropped out in 8th grade due to having 3+ children.

In 9th grade, we had over 2k students. Graduation was like 450.

[PinkSquirrel]

Sept 19, 2012 11:24:02 GMT -5 skippingstones said:

This is normal to me I guess. I grew up in a town with one of the highest teen pregnancy rates in the US. A lot of people dropped out in 8th grade due to having 3+ children.

In 9th grade, we had over 2k students. Graduation was like 450.

:-|

[Deleted]

Yeah. it was the BEST birth control ever. My parents worried about me, but knew they taught me well.

A LOT of my friends had kids in high school :\

[SKP82]

This is so, so sad.

When I was in college, I did a group project on teenage pregnancy. Back then, if a school wanted to teach the comprehensive method (abstinence and birth control) in sex ed, the program wasn't entitled to government funding. Only schools that taught abstinence only.

It is sooo fucked up because it is a crazy cycle. Children of teen mothers are more likely to become teen mothers themselves. Also, in SC at this time, the state paid for 80% of the first pregnancy, 100% of the second. It just doesn't make sense...

[CheshireGrin]

This is so sad. We have a ton of pregnant teenagers in the city where I work, and they come through the ER all the time, either while they're pregnant, or they bring the babies in once they're born. It's so sad. I mean, some of them are really doting parents but OMG CLUELESS. We try to do as much education for them as possible, but it's such a broken system.

[statlerwaldorf]

My cousin became a stepgrandma at 28 when her 12 year old had a baby. The father was in the same grade as her. I really don't think sex ed would help. I honestly think she wanted to get pregnant. She's had a tough life. My cousin and her husband were addicted to drugs and lost custody of the kids for several years before being given back custody. She was excited about the baby and so was my cousin. She threw her a baby shower. The 12 y/o dropped out of school to attend an online school which she hasn't been doing. The grandma has been the one taking care of the baby and getting up with her in the middle of the night. No one has been parenting this poor girl. She's spent her life bouncing around from bio mom, to dad, to foster care, to grandparents, etc. And of course the boy that was really excited about this baby is no longer in the child's life.

[amberlyrose]

I had a friend in elementary/HS who was in this cycle.
Her grandma had her mom at 15.
Mom had her at 14.
Friend was pregnant by 17? I think.

To be a great grandma before 50 would freak me out.

[Deleted]

How can a person get excited about that? She's not even a teenager.
I am horrified and sad. That poor baby.

[Deleted]

Sept 19, 2012 11:27:19 GMT -5 mekiakoo said:

Sept 19, 2012 11:24:02 GMT -5 skippingstones said:

This is normal to me I guess. I grew up in a town with one of the highest teen pregnancy rates in the US. A lot of people dropped out in 8th grade due to having 3+ children.

In 9th grade, we had over 2k students. Graduation was like 450.

Oh my god.

It was also a product of the culture of where I lived. I was on the Mexican border and I'm not saying al border cities are like this, but ours was. Most girls saw that their mom had multiple kids and at young ages (due to lack of sex ed) so the young girl had sex at a young age and got pregnant.

The mentality of a lot of women down there was "You aren't a woman until you have a child" so the young girls saw this as a badge of honor. :\ its sad.

[pittsmcgee]

This is all so terrifying. I mean, I worry about my 16 y/o, but now I have to start worrying about my 9 y/o?? WTF

[Deleted]

Sex ed is good but it's not the lack of it that's causing it. The sad fact is that many of the young girls who are becoming pregnant know about birth control. The problem is that they don't see teen pregnancy or even early motherhood as some awful thing that needs to be prevented.

Unfortunately, some of the girls/women out there who are least able to be decent parents want a child the most.

I'm not sure how you combat that but it's going to take a lot more than birth control and sex ed.

[iamgrace]

I can't even...I can't process this.

This is so, so sad.

[malibu]

That's messed up.

[Deleted]

This is true, too, Habs but I feel that sort of stuff should be covered in sex ed, too.

Holistic sexual education.

[Deleted]

Sept 19, 2012 12:16:13 GMT -5 @habbsies said:

Sex ed is good but it's not the lack of it that's causing it. The sad fact is that many of the young girls who are becoming pregnant know about birth control. The problem is that they don't see teen pregnancy or even early motherhood as some awful thing that needs to be prevented.

Unfortunately, some of the girls/women out there who are least able to be decent parents want a child the most.

I'm not sure how you combat that but it's going to take a lot more than birth control and sex ed.

I totally agree with this.

You can shove education and information down their throats until they're sick about it, but it won't do any good.

One of my Anthropology professors' area of focus is reproductive rights and border town medical issues. She helped implement a program that showed teen aged girls what it really is like to be "16 and pregnant". It helped the teen pregnancy rate drop a little bit.

[karmasabiotch]

I read someplace that 60% of kids exiting 8'th grade have had oral sex. I don't think that it's too far of a leap to think that 30% of them have probably gone the rest of the way. I'm surprised we don't hear about more of that population having babies or or pregnancies.

[eddy]

Since I have a baby at home right now I have been reading a lot about nuturing and how important it is in these early months. You know picking them up, snuggling, talking to them. Easy stuff but how developmentally important it is.

Even a well intentioned 12 year old would really struggle with this. And if her mother was a very young mom she might have struggled too. And the cycle continues you know. It just makes me sad. A baby needs so little, but what they do need is so freaking important. I can not imagine my 12 year old self being selfless enough to meet the needs of a baby.

[imoan]

But even if sex ed IS covered (holistically, whatever)... some people DON'T CARE. They want a child because they have nothing in their own lives. They feel unloved, unwanted. Having a baby gives them something to dote on, something that they believe will give their lives purpose, something that will ALWAYS love them even when the rest of their family and friends leave them. Even more heartbreaking than teen pregnancy are some of the reasons behind it (not just lack of sex ed or stupid kids thinking they're immune to pregnancy).