BFP after RPL- loss confirmed- again genetics normal

[seeyalater52]

I’m so sorry for your loss peony.

[pooh8402]

Oh damn it. I'm so sorry.

[shoeless]

I am so very sorry. Since you have plans for the weekend I would keep on the progesterone. For both my miscarriages it was at least 10 days from stopping the progesterone before any bleeding but I wouldn't chance it.

[pinkpeony08]

Feb 12, 2020 21:20:25 GMT -5 shoeless said:

I am so very sorry. Since you have plans for the weekend I would keep on the progesterone. For both my miscarriages it was at least 10 days from stopping the progesterone before any bleeding but I wouldn't chance it.

That’s helpful, thanks. I feel a little bad wanting a d&c being so early, but I really don’t want to risk not being able to send the tissue for genetic testing after all of this.

[seeyalater52]

Feb 12, 2020 22:01:20 GMT -5 pinkpeony08 said:

Feb 12, 2020 21:20:25 GMT -5 shoeless said:

I am so very sorry. Since you have plans for the weekend I would keep on the progesterone. For both my miscarriages it was at least 10 days from stopping the progesterone before any bleeding but I wouldn't chance it.

That’s helpful, thanks. I feel a little bad wanting a d&c being so early, but I really don’t want to risk not being able to send the tissue for genetic testing after all of this.

Do not feel bad. That is absolutely your right. I did the extract same thing, down to continuing progesterone to stop from miscarrying prior to the D&C. You get to make this choice.

[scm1011]

I am so sorry

[msmerymac]

Feb 12, 2020 22:01:20 GMT -5 pinkpeony08 said:

Feb 12, 2020 21:20:25 GMT -5 shoeless said:

I am so very sorry. Since you have plans for the weekend I would keep on the progesterone. For both my miscarriages it was at least 10 days from stopping the progesterone before any bleeding but I wouldn't chance it.

That’s helpful, thanks. I feel a little bad wanting a d&c being so early, but I really don’t want to risk not being able to send the tissue for genetic testing after all of this.

No one will judge you for that! All my losses have been around 6 weeks. The first, I should have had a D&C, but didn't want to take a day off work (you don't make rational decisions in a time like that) so just took the pills and waited. Second one just completed on it's own, very quickly. Third I did the D&C and it was the best choice. We got the genetic testing (although it was a genetically tested embryo) and I also started to feel physically better immediately (I had the worst pain and cramping of my life with that one). It was like I woke up from surgery and the first tri fog had totally lifted. 

I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for your recovery. Try to have a good weekend with friends. <3

[pinkpeony08]

Feb 13, 2020 12:32:15 GMT -5 msmerymac said:

Feb 12, 2020 22:01:20 GMT -5 pinkpeony08 said:

That’s helpful, thanks. I feel a little bad wanting a d&c being so early, but I really don’t want to risk not being able to send the tissue for genetic testing after all of this.

No one will judge you for that! All my losses have been around 6 weeks. The first, I should have had a D&C, but didn't want to take a day off work (you don't make rational decisions in a time like that) so just took the pills and waited. Second one just completed on it's own, very quickly. Third I did the D&C and it was the best choice. We got the genetic testing (although it was a genetically tested embryo) and I also started to feel physically better immediately (I had the worst pain and cramping of my life with that one). It was like I woke up from surgery and the first tri fog had totally lifted. 

I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for your recovery. Try to have a good weekend with friends. <3

Thanks. All of my prior losses have been later that a d&c was recommended, concern I would have too much bleeding at home and require going to the emergency room. I had the same experience regarding the physical recovery from the d&c, except the bleeding that seems to always last 4 weeks for me afterwards. And we are going on a beach vacation 2.5 weeks after the d&c. I was really hoping to swim. Frustrating how so much of my life in the last 3 years has been impacted by being pregnant or the effects of losing pregnancies.

[stellelinds25]

I'm so sorry...try and enjoy yourself this weekend and take care of you.

[pinkpeony08]

Ultrasound confirmed at my regular ob today. Looked basically the same as last week- small fetal pole measuring the same as a week ago. D&c scheduled for Thursday. Hoping it stays put until then. My husband and I both feel like this loss has been easier emotionally, which I am grateful for. Hoping the genetic testing gives us some information. Thank you for all the support and kind words.

[achi]

I’m so sorry.

[awkwardpenguin]

I'm so sorry. I hope you get some information from the genetic testing.

[seeyalater52]

I'm so sorry. I hope the genetic testing gives you some answers.

[icedcoffee]

I am so sorry. I hope you get some answers.

[kristind3]

I’m so sorry.

[msmerymac]

I'm so, so sorry. I hope you find some answers from the genetic testing.

[landmermaid]

I'm so sorry 💔

[pinkpeony08]

The genetics came back from my D&C - normal. I'm still waiting on micro array, but I was really hoping that this would come back as a genetic issue given it was so much earlier than the other losses. Before this came back, we talked about being done if this was genetically normal again because clearly something is wrong and even all these meds to help tamper my immune system weren't helping. If it were a trisomy and for once my body was doing what it was supposed to do, we would consider one more try. This has been such a long, hard road with no rainbow at the end of the storm. I find it really hard and frustrating that almost all of the miscarriage resources talk about having a successful pregnancy after a loss, yet that clearly doesn't happen for everyone.

[achi]

I’m so sorry, it is so disheartening to be told that everything was normal. Big hugs to you.

[seeyalater52]

I’m so sorry Peony. It is so confusing when there is no clear explanation. I’ve also found information about miscarriages to be super isolating - both because of the focus on having successful pregnancies and births after prior losses, and because of the assumption that people experiencing loss already have living children (either before or after the loss.) It sucks when you experience something so emotional and then reading other peoples’ experiences just makes you feel even more alone. Sending all my love.

[knx9211]

I am so sorry.

[calmcosmo]

Feb 26, 2020 9:14:53 GMT -5 pinkpeony08 said:

The genetics came back from my D&C - normal. I'm still waiting on micro array, but I was really hoping that this would come back as a genetic issue given it was so much earlier than the other losses. Before this came back, we talked about being done if this was genetically normal again because clearly something is wrong and even all these meds to help tamper my immune system weren't helping. If it were a trisomy and for once my body was doing what it was supposed to do, we would consider one more try. This has been such a long, hard road with no rainbow at the end of the storm. I find it really hard and frustrating that almost all of the miscarriage resources talk about having a successful pregnancy after a loss, yet that clearly doesn't happen for everyone.

I'm so sorry.

I walked away from the dream of having a third child after four miscarriages. It wasn't at all how I envisioned we would complete our family, but it was the best decision for my husband and I after all of the losses. If you ever need to talk to someone who gets it, feel free to message me. I know it's complicated because we have healthy kids, but letting go of how we envision our family is a loss and grieving is normal. 

[icedcoffee]

I am so sorry.

[pandora89]

I am so sorry

[shoeless]

I am so sorry

[pinkpeony08]

Feb 26, 2020 10:15:32 GMT -5 calmcosmo said:

Feb 26, 2020 9:14:53 GMT -5 pinkpeony08 said:

The genetics came back from my D&C - normal. I'm still waiting on micro array, but I was really hoping that this would come back as a genetic issue given it was so much earlier than the other losses. Before this came back, we talked about being done if this was genetically normal again because clearly something is wrong and even all these meds to help tamper my immune system weren't helping. If it were a trisomy and for once my body was doing what it was supposed to do, we would consider one more try. This has been such a long, hard road with no rainbow at the end of the storm. I find it really hard and frustrating that almost all of the miscarriage resources talk about having a successful pregnancy after a loss, yet that clearly doesn't happen for everyone.

I'm so sorry.

I walked away from the dream of having a third child after four miscarriages. It wasn't at all how I envisioned we would complete our family, but it was the best decision for my husband and I after all of the losses. If you ever need to talk to someone who gets it, feel free to message me. I know it's complicated because we have healthy kids, but letting go of how we envision our family is a loss and grieving is normal. 

Thanks.  It is complicated, and I feel like I don't clearly fit into one group because while I am so grateful for my two healthy kids, I so badly want for them to have another sibling.  My daughter still asks (she only knew about the 15 week loss) if we are still sad about the baby that died and if we hope we might have another baby.  I may take up your offer to message in coming days.