I will start by acknowledging my privilege - I have a nanny/housekeeper who lives with us. She goes home every other weekend and this was her weekend off. But Jamaica has been flooded this weekend - we have been having rains associated with what is now TS Zeta for about 4 days and communities are flooded, roads are blocked and people are stranded. So she is unable to get to work today. Am hoping she is able to get to us tomorrow but there are no guarantees.
So now I'm having to do the rearrange my work (was supposed to be in office today), and try and complete some work deadlines from home while supervising 2 kids who are doing online school and supposed to be doing their mid-term tests. Oh, and to complicate it more, the electricity and internet are also being iffy.
Also due to the rain, my kids havent been able to play outside so are bouncing off the walls with excess energy.
Post by formerlyak on Oct 26, 2020 10:16:26 GMT -5
My teen’s friend took his own life last week. Tonight there is a memorial and I am taking the teen (it’s outdoor and masks are required). I’m nervous and not sure what to expect in terms of how teen reacts. Telling teen that his friend committed suicide was the hardest thing I’ve had to do as a parent hands down. Teen has asked for some time alone since I delivered the news, but otherwise seems to be handling it as well as can be expected so far.
formerlyak, I am so very sorry. My mom had to call me at college to tell me that my friend died by suicide and now that I'm a parent I get emotional when I think about how she felt delivering that news. I read William Styron's book Darkness Visible and it really helped me understand what my friend was going through before she died. It helped alleviate the guilt I felt. You might look into it and see if it's appropriate for your son.
Post by formerlyak on Oct 26, 2020 10:54:21 GMT -5
mdmomof2 thank you. I will definitely check out that book. And sorry about your friend. I know it was in the past, but I can't imagine what it was like to hear that.
My kids (4 and 1) are home with us. Again. My husband is out of vacation days. I’ve got a couple left. Daycare notified us of a potential covid exposure in my older daughter’s class, so both kids are staying home until they get the results, and then potentially 2 weeks quarantine if it’s positive. We do not have 2 weeks of vacation between us left since we have burned through all of it with the baby getting sick and being out for a week, daycare being closed for holidays (Jewish daycare) and teacher in service days, etc.
I’m thinking about the winter going forward and I have no idea what to do. We are locked into a contract with the daycare, so we can’t just pull them and hire a nanny, even if having a nanny in our tiny house was a viable option.
My kids (4 and 1) are home with us. Again. My husband is out of vacation days. I’ve got a couple left. Daycare notified us of a potential covid exposure in my older daughter’s class, so both kids are staying home until they get the results, and then potentially 2 weeks quarantine if it’s positive. We do not have 2 weeks of vacation between us left since we have burned through all of it with the baby getting sick and being out for a week, daycare being closed for holidays (Jewish daycare) and teacher in service days, etc.
I’m thinking about the winter going forward and I have no idea what to do. We are locked into a contract with the daycare, so we can’t just pull them and hire a nanny, even if having a nanny in our tiny house was a viable option.
Can you take Covid relief leave? I think it’s 2/3 pay but it would offset some of the damage if possible.
Things are okay on our end - it's just super cold so the kids are less likely to want to go outside. We painted paper pumpkins yesterday and they really enjoyed that.
This weekend is supposed to be cold and possibly rainy, and we're going to go to IL's house for some festivities outdoors.
mdmomof2 thank you. I will definitely check out that book. And sorry about your friend. I know it was in the past, but I can't imagine what it was like to hear that.
Thank you. She died in March of 1994 and while I don't think about it every day it's still something that affects me deeply. It was my first experience in what grief is really like. You never "get over" someone's death you just learn to live with it. I hope your son has a peaceful process for coming to terms with his friend's death.
My sympathies to those who are having childcare issues.
Today is my first day back to work after Family Leave, and last night my 1st postpartum period started... yay...
I'm lucky that I still get to WFH, and my H is using his leave to watch DS. I have no idea what we'll do for childcare when H's leave runs out at the end of January. We are both able to WFH, but I'm not sure how that will go when we are both actively working and caring for an infant. We've stayed in our quarantine bubble since March, and I'm going to have major issues trusting a daycare with my baby while COVID is still a thing.
Post by eponinepontmercy on Oct 26, 2020 14:43:57 GMT -5
I think we are going to go trick or treating on Saturday in my BIL and SIL's neighborhood. I'm not sure how I feel about it yet. SIL is a nurse practitioner and has been pretty conservative this whole time so I think I trust her judgement. I told DD that if we feel uncomfortable, we can go home and just buy a bunch of candy.
I think we are going to go trick or treating on Saturday in my BIL and SIL's neighborhood. I'm not sure how I feel about it yet. SIL is a nurse practitioner and has been pretty conservative this whole time so I think I trust her judgement. I told DD that if we feel uncomfortable, we can go home and just buy a bunch of candy.
We are too. Our neighborhood is always really quiet (like 10 trick or treaters is a big year) and most of our neighbors just take the screens off their doors so they don't have to open the door, or leave out candy, so I feel pretty good about the decision. If it feels uncomfortable, we'll just go home and eat the candy we bought to give out.
Post by breezy8407 on Oct 26, 2020 16:29:49 GMT -5
We already planted the seed that we most likely won't be trick or treating. I don't know many neighbors well enough to gauge our comfort level with them. I bought a bunch of candy, glow sticks and we plan to make fun foods and watch movies. I dunno. Maybe I will go walk around and assess the situation. Sometimes people hang out in their driveways around a fire.
Post by formerlyak on Oct 26, 2020 16:56:52 GMT -5
Thank you, everyone. I actually just got back from bringing teen up to school to get a picture taken for the Mock Trial team he is a part of, and he got to see half a dozen or so of his friends he hasn't seen since March there. He also got to meet some of the older kids who are in Mock Trial with him, who until now he has only interacted with on screen. When we pulled up and he saw his old friends, he all but leaped out of the car. He was so excited. He got back in the car and said, "It was so good to see friends and other people who aren't you, no offense." LOL. None taken, kid. I am really glad the group photo was today so he had something fun to do before we go to the memorial.
I was in a car accident on Friday in car line to pick up DD2 and a friends child from school.
Some guy went to pull forward and we think his foot got stuck on the gas. He sped forward, swerved, ran over parking bumps and hit a car. Which then got pushed into three others.
He reversed at high speeds over the parking bumps and into a car spun that one one 90 degrees into another car. Then he bounced off over the parking bumps again into a truck which slid into mine.
I was reading a book with my car in park when I heard a crash and then the next thing I know my window was shattered and my airbags were deployed.
9 cars, 8 parked, 6 had to be towed away and likely totaled.
It was fucking insanity.
I’m still a bit sore but okay. Car line today was nerve wracking.
Post by susquehanna on Oct 27, 2020 7:36:17 GMT -5
My small city has established official trick-or-treating times for Halloween night. If they "cancel" trick or treating, then each neighborhood in my city will just go ahead and plan their own trick-or-treating event, and the city won't have any control over it. Since the city has established official trick-or-treating times, they can schedule extra police to patrol each neighborhood to make sure that people are following the speed limit and not trying to kidnap children.
I own a portable clothes rack that I use to dry laundry outside. I am going to set it up in my front yard, and tape the candy to the laundry rack. I will sit within sight of the rack in order to prevent stealing. This way, I can pass out candy while also social distancing.
Post by seeyalater52 on Oct 27, 2020 12:21:04 GMT -5
New mommy brain dump:
I’m having the BEST time on maternity leave. J is amazing and so fun and honestly missing work during an incredibly stressful period is awesome. I so wish we could afford for me to quit my job and stay home. The thought of leaving him makes me so sad. Hopefully I get over that feeling before my leave ends in January.
We aren’t going anywhere for Halloween but J is going to be a peanin a pod and I’m so excited bc it’s going to be adorable.
My Nov goal is going to be to remember to brush my teeth. I’m so out of my normal routine it’s hard to remember and between pregnancy and not having my regular cleaning due to Covid I’m a little worried things are going to go south.
Post by seeyalater52 on Oct 27, 2020 12:23:48 GMT -5
Also has anyone else dealt with an infant hemangioma? Jules has one on the top of his hairline. It’s superficial and cosmetic but it’s grown since birth and it makes me nervous that he’ll have permanent scarring. The pediatric dermatologist was super breezy about it and we have a treatment plan and a topical medication but I’ve never known anyone else who has dealt with this before and I’m a little anxious.
Also pissed bc my baby is fucking beautiful and we barely go anywhere and we have still had two strangers ask us what is “wrong” with him (back up dude, 6 feet away!)
Also has anyone else dealt with an infant hemangioma? Jules has one on the top of his hairline. It’s superficial and cosmetic but it’s grown since birth and it makes me nervous that he’ll have permanent scarring. The pediatric dermatologist was super breezy about it and we have a treatment plan and a topical medication but I’ve never known anyone else who has dealt with this before and I’m a little anxious.
Also pissed bc my baby is fucking beautiful and we barely go anywhere and we have still had two strangers ask us what is “wrong” with him (back up dude, 6 feet away!)
My niece had one. She’s 11 now and I had entirely forgotten about it until your post. It went away long ago!
Post by penguingrrl on Oct 27, 2020 12:27:29 GMT -5
My kids went back into the school building today for the first time since March. My introverted 11 year old who has gone through severe anxiety and depression is happier than I’ve seen her since then. I still have major concerns about the safety of it, but balancing her mental health is important too. I hope we don’t regret this choice.
Also has anyone else dealt with an infant hemangioma? Jules has one on the top of his hairline. It’s superficial and cosmetic but it’s grown since birth and it makes me nervous that he’ll have permanent scarring. The pediatric dermatologist was super breezy about it and we have a treatment plan and a topical medication but I’ve never known anyone else who has dealt with this before and I’m a little anxious.
Also pissed bc my baby is fucking beautiful and we barely go anywhere and we have still had two strangers ask us what is “wrong” with him (back up dude, 6 feet away!)
Yeah. H had one when she was little. It got bigger till about 6-12 months and then and it's constantly faded as she's gotten older and now at 6-1/2 it's only noticeable if you really look. I can send you some pics if it'll help calm your nerves.
Also has anyone else dealt with an infant hemangioma? Jules has one on the top of his hairline. It’s superficial and cosmetic but it’s grown since birth and it makes me nervous that he’ll have permanent scarring. The pediatric dermatologist was super breezy about it and we have a treatment plan and a topical medication but I’ve never known anyone else who has dealt with this before and I’m a little anxious.
Also pissed bc my baby is fucking beautiful and we barely go anywhere and we have still had two strangers ask us what is “wrong” with him (back up dude, 6 feet away!)
Yeah. H had one when she was little. It got bigger till about 6-12 months and then and it's constantly faded as she's gotten older and now at 6-1/2 it's only noticeable if you really look. I can send you some pics if it'll help calm your nerves.
If it’s not too annoying I’d love to see pics. I know I’m being anxious (and maybe a little bit vain too) but it kind of blows my mind that I’ve never seen a baby with this when everyone says it’s so common! Did you do any treatment on it when H was little?