Right, @stevia. egishere did and I also included her quote. The thing is that it isn't just people in West County who use the high school thing to size people up. The minute people hear where I grew up and where I went to high school I'm bucketed too - as a west county asshole. It's hardly what Black folks deal with but it's an easy out for people to feel like they aren't part of the problem. Like, you could look at the lily-white streets of St. Louis Hills - which is a blue collar area, or St. Charles, which couldn't even be bothered with a mask mandate and has Trumpers on every corner. It's too much of an out to say only people at the VP ball or only people in this zip are the cause of racism in STL. 🤷♀️
I agree. I don't think myself or egishere were saying differently. Chesterfield is definitely a white collar area, which positively correlates with elitism due to money and race, and that's all I was responding to.
But MO as a whole is an extremely racist state so I don't think one area is more or less racist than another.
I live in a very white, rural, low income and blue collar area and I see plenty here, too. (There are lots of reasons why I continue to live here including family and money issues, but I deplore the podunk racism.)
circa1978 I'm sorry you're feeling attacked. St. Louis segregation in all of its many forms is gross. I hate the high school question no matter who is asking it. I get that other cities do it, I get that we aren't special, but the idea behind that question in St. Louis, I guess specifically, is that it's loaded and so many people ask now without thinking about why they're doing it.
There are a fuck ton of problematic racists in North County too. They're everywhere. More than 50% of white people outwardly are by voting for Trump, and even more of us are by enjoying the privilege of being white (a privilege created by oppression). We are all problematic, no matter how "woke" we are.
I only have a problem with people in West County (and literally anywhere else) who tell me they live there because it's safer, the schools are better, etc. If you are saying those words about an area that is super white...you're saying it because it's white and that makes you (general you, not you) feel safer.
Also, very not related nor directed at you, St. Charles isn't St. Louis and my lifelong pet peeve is anyone from there that introduces themselves as being from St. Louis because I'm apparently very petty and in charge of who can call where home.
Yes, sproctopus. Exactly. Especially this "We are all problematic, no matter how "woke" we are." I 100 percent agree. I don't particularly feel attacked but focusing on a specific area or suburb just seems like a super simple way to box things up and say, oh, it's just those assholes in X. Or it's just the klan. Or whatever. I don't have the answers, quite obviously. But it's just not that easy. This particular part of St. Louis is my home and has been for nearly as long as my family has been in America at all. For better or worse. I choose to make it better with my vote, my activism and my voice. 🤷♀️
Yes, sproctopus. Exactly. Especially this "We are all problematic, no matter how "woke" we are." I 100 percent agree. I don't particularly feel attacked but focusing on a specific area or suburb just seems like a super simple way to box things up and say, oh, it's just those assholes in X. Or it's just the klan. Or whatever. I don't have the answers, quite obviously. But it's just not that easy. This particular part of St. Louis is my home and has been for nearly as long as my family has been in America at all. For better or worse. I choose to make it better with my vote, my activism and my voice. 🤷♀️
Sorry, I knew attacked didn't feel like the right word, but I could tell you felt defensive.
And you're right. Making it about "the others" is a really great way to feel better about the less obvious ways we (white people) benefit from it in every other facet.
Post by gretchenindisguise on Jun 9, 2021 10:36:47 GMT -5
It also kind of bothers me that it’s the 19-year-old females who are bearing the brunt of this ire and not their families/fathers who thrust them into this.
Is anyone speaking of boycotting Commerce Bank (Kemper family) or Schnucks or Schlafly? All three families have been named to the same title that Ellie Kemper was since 2001.
Also, very not related nor directed at you, St. Charles isn't St. Louis and my lifelong pet peeve is anyone from there that introduces themselves as being from St. Louis because I'm apparently very petty and in charge of who can call where home.
My xH is from St. Charles and always introduced himself as being from St. Louis. The first time we visited and it took an hour+ to get into the city, I was all, "can you actually claim St. Louis? That's weird."
His family did not ask me about high school but as soon as they found out where I went to college, they called me "highfalutin'" (I have no clue how to spell that) and wrote me off as a a liberal asshole. They were super fun.
It also kind of bothers me that it’s the 19-year-old females who are bearing the brunt of this ire and not their families/fathers who thrust them into this.
Is anyone speaking of boycotting Commerce Bank (Kemper family) or Schnucks or Schlafly? All three families have been named to the same title that Ellie Kemper was since 2001.
The Schlafy's are known assholes, aren't they?
I dont know much about the Schnucks family except that the groceries are stupid expensive, but slightly less than Deirbergs.
Also, very not related nor directed at you, St. Charles isn't St. Louis and my lifelong pet peeve is anyone from there that introduces themselves as being from St. Louis because I'm apparently very petty and in charge of who can call where home.
My xH is from St. Charles and always introduced himself as being from St. Louis. The first time we visited and it took an hour+ to get into the city, I was all, "can you actually claim St. Louis? That's weird."
To shift this convo to a different metro area, this is what confuses me about Chicago. People from Wisconsin will say they are "from Chicago." Also, the word Chicagoland will never cease to amuse me.
I get that most ppl have heard of StL and not St. Chuck (I hate that name too lol), and maybe the same is true for Wisconsinites. But why not just say, I'm from XYZ, just outside of better known city.
This is literally one of the dumbest things for me to be mad about but it drives me crazy and I can't help it.
My xH is from St. Charles and always introduced himself as being from St. Louis. The first time we visited and it took an hour+ to get into the city, I was all, "can you actually claim St. Louis? That's weird."
To shift this convo to a different metro area, this is what confuses me about Chicago. People from Wisconsin will say they are "from Chicago." Also, the word Chicagoland will never cease to amuse me.
Ha. It took me a long time as an adult to get used to saying I'm from Chicago AREA instead of from Chicago, because growing up that's always what my family called it. Never mind it would take 90+ minutes to drive into the city from where we were.
I lived in eastern Iowa for 10 years and would tell people I met when traveling internationally that I lived "near Chicago", because I assumed most of them had no clue what Iowa was.
I have a good friend here in Baltimore who says she is from St Louis but she's from Illinois and about an hour away. Is it an Illinois thing or do people do this other places?
wildrice , the St. Louis metro area straddles the Mississippi into Illinois, so that can be true and is normal. I'm always amused that Missouri's other metro, Kansas City, has the same thing going on with the state of Kansas. It's like both our urban areas are desperately inching away from the rest of the state.
To shift this convo to a different metro area, this is what confuses me about Chicago. People from Wisconsin will say they are "from Chicago." Also, the word Chicagoland will never cease to amuse me.
Ha. It took me a long time as an adult to get used to saying I'm from Chicago AREA instead of from Chicago, because growing up that's always what my family called it. Never mind it would take 90+ minutes to drive into the city from where we were.
I lived in eastern Iowa for 10 years and would tell people I met when traveling internationally that I lived "near Chicago", because I assumed most of them had no clue what Iowa was.
I have a good friend here in Baltimore who says she is from St Louis but she's from Illinois and about an hour away. Is it an Illinois thing or do people do this other places?
Let's be honest, there are people in the states who still get confused about Iowa. DH is from Des Moines and it's a running joke that Iowa--Idaho--Ohio are frequently confused.
Ha. It took me a long time as an adult to get used to saying I'm from Chicago AREA instead of from Chicago, because growing up that's always what my family called it. Never mind it would take 90+ minutes to drive into the city from where we were.
I lived in eastern Iowa for 10 years and would tell people I met when traveling internationally that I lived "near Chicago", because I assumed most of them had no clue what Iowa was.
I have a good friend here in Baltimore who says she is from St Louis but she's from Illinois and about an hour away. Is it an Illinois thing or do people do this other places?
Let's be honest, there are people in the states who still get confused about Iowa. DH is from Des Moines and it's a running joke that Iowa--Idaho--Ohio are frequently confused.
I've definitely run into that out here in Maryland. Most people I speak to here have never been to Iowa and it's not unusual to get it mixed up with other states.
When people ask where I’m from, my answer depends on where I am when the question is asked and how much the other person knows about the general area. When I’m in our small city, I’ll name the actual smaller city where I live. If I’m an hour away, I give the bigger city’s name. If I’m out of state, I name the state. When I’m abroad, I’ll often say “Chicago” even though it’s 4 hours away. At that point, people don’t know the area and don’t really even care. They’re being polite and making conversation.
I grew up an hour from St. Louis. I’d never claim it as “home” when I’m within a few hours, but will now say, “I grew up near STL” as it is where we spent a lot of time growing up…and no one knows (or cares) about the po-dunk town where I really grew up.
When people ask where I’m from, my answer depends on where I am when the question is asked and how much the other person knows about the general area. When I’m in our small city, I’ll name the actual smaller city where I live. If I’m an hour away, I give the bigger city’s name. If I’m out of state, I name the state. When I’m abroad, I’ll often say “Chicago” even though it’s 4 hours away. At that point, people don’t know the area and don’t really even care. They’re being polite and making conversation.
I grew up an hour from St. Louis. I’d never claim it as “home” when I’m within a few hours, but will now say, “I grew up near STL” as it is where we spent a lot of time growing up…and no one knows (or cares) about the po-dunk town where I really grew up.
When people ask where I’m from, my answer depends on where I am when the question is asked and how much the other person knows about the general area. When I’m in our small city, I’ll name the actual smaller city where I live. If I’m an hour away, I give the bigger city’s name. If I’m out of state, I name the state. When I’m abroad, I’ll often say “Chicago” even though it’s 4 hours away. At that point, people don’t know the area and don’t really even care. They’re being polite and making conversation.
I grew up an hour from St. Louis. I’d never claim it as “home” when I’m within a few hours, but will now say, “I grew up near STL” as it is where we spent a lot of time growing up…and no one knows (or cares) about the po-dunk town where I really grew up.
Don't let my stupid pet peeve influence you! I have no idea why it drives me crazy, but truly, it's just specific to St. Charles, lol.
I have so many more things in this world to put energy into and yet...here is this stupid ass thing.
When people ask where I’m from, my answer depends on where I am when the question is asked and how much the other person knows about the general area. When I’m in our small city, I’ll name the actual smaller city where I live. If I’m an hour away, I give the bigger city’s name. If I’m out of state, I name the state. When I’m abroad, I’ll often say “Chicago” even though it’s 4 hours away. At that point, people don’t know the area and don’t really even care. They’re being polite and making conversation.
I grew up an hour from St. Louis. I’d never claim it as “home” when I’m within a few hours, but will now say, “I grew up near STL” as it is where we spent a lot of time growing up…and no one knows (or cares) about the po-dunk town where I really grew up.
Are you in IL or MO?
Neither, now! But I grew up on the IL side. I never thought of myself as growing up in STL…not even close. But now that I’m farther away, it’s just easier than giving a longer description. And I’m lazy.
No worries, I’m not offended in the slightest. I was just offering insight from someone who grew up nowhere, but needs to be able to claim a place that people recognize from time to time. I have family in STL (used to live on The Hill) and they are VERY, VERY opinionated about who can/should claim themselves as living “in St. Louis.”
STL is just a quirky city. It has great things and awful things…but I don’t think that’s much different than any other city.
Neither, now! But I grew up on the IL side. I never thought of myself as growing up in STL…not even close. But now that I’m farther away, it’s just easier than giving a longer description. And I’m lazy.
No worries, I’m not offended in the slightest. I was just offering insight from someone who grew up nowhere, but needs to be able to claim a place that people recognize from time to time. I have family in STL (used to live on The Hill) and they are VERY, VERY opinionated about who can/should claim themselves as living “in St. Louis.”
STL is just a quirky city. It has great things and awful things…but I don’t think that’s much different than any other city.
I was just wondering cause I'm in a podunk town an hour from STL on the MO side 😊
When people ask, I say STL surrounding area cause no one not from my area knows my town. Even people in STL County have no idea what I'm talking about 😄
My xH is from St. Charles and always introduced himself as being from St. Louis. The first time we visited and it took an hour+ to get into the city, I was all, "can you actually claim St. Louis? That's weird."
To shift this convo to a different metro area, this is what confuses me about Chicago. People from Wisconsin will say they are "from Chicago." Also, the word Chicagoland will never cease to amuse me.
I am, and since about 7th grade, have been from the western burbs. Which is what I usually say. But in undergrad at Illinois I would say I'm from Chicago. My roommate from Lincoln Park would be all upset about this. My response is that I'm not teaching geography to those south of I-80 :-)
I love the word "Chicagoland." Like it's an amusement park. "Kids, get in the car! We're going Chicagoland!"
I think asking about HS is a smaller traditionally industrial/blue collar city thing. Baltimore can be similar. It’s not a city of transplants the way larger cities can be. People stay put.
I remember when my brother got married and his wife’s uncle asked me where he went to school. I had forgotten the love of HS and said the name of his college and he looked flummoxed. Then I told him which HS and he was shocked he wasn’t from “here” where her family lived and they were moving to—my brother went to school 20 minutes away in the same county! LOL
The South Suburbs and the whiter parts of the South Side of Chicago are still like this. They want to know not just what high school you went to but which parish you attended. "South Side Irish" is still a thing.
When someone locally asks me where I live, I say St. Charles. If they're also from the area, I'll go into neighborhoods/areas. If anyone from outside of the metro area asks me where I live, I just say STL. If they know the area, I'll clarify. Mostly, I find that people not from the area (or in this thread lol) don't actually care about the geographical nuance.
Also, as someone who moved here from SC (and married a local), I find this thread AMAZINGLY INTERESTING. H has lots of opinions about local regionality.
STL certainly has its problems, many of which I'm still learning about and seeing for the first time, but it's sadly not unfamiliar. STL is really very "southern" in the worst way.
I just want to go on record saying I fully realize what a weirdo I am for the anger it creates for me. It's fleeting, but I have no idea why I care so deeply.
I used to buy all my drugs from the kids in St. Charles. I loved it! LOL.
Post by amberlyrose on Jun 9, 2021 13:59:41 GMT -5
When telling people I'm from New Mexico, it's either met with confusion or immediately with some reference to Albuquerque and Breaking Bad. I usually say I grew up just north of El Paso, TX in New Mexico. It at least gives people a geographical area without explaining that NM is very large.
circa1978 I'm sorry you're feeling attacked. St. Louis segregation in all of its many forms is gross. I hate the high school question no matter who is asking it. I get that other cities do it, I get that we aren't special, but the idea behind that question in St. Louis, I guess specifically, is that it's loaded and so many people ask now without thinking about why they're doing it.
There are a fuck ton of problematic racists in North County too. They're everywhere. More than 50% of white people outwardly are by voting for Trump, and even more of us are by enjoying the privilege of being white (a privilege created by oppression). We are all problematic, no matter how "woke" we are.
I only have a problem with people in West County (and literally anywhere else) who tell me they live there because it's safer, the schools are better, etc. If you are saying those words about an area that is super white...you're saying it because it's white and that makes you (general you, not you) feel safer.
Also, very not related nor directed at you, St. Charles isn't St. Louis and my lifelong pet peeve is anyone from there that introduces themselves as being from St. Louis because I'm apparently very petty and in charge of who can call where home.
As someone from west county that now lives in KC, I have the same pet peeves! Especially when I say I'm from ST Louis county and then they say they are too. Ummm no you're not! And people here think I'm being dramatic. Haha.
When telling people I'm from New Mexico, it's either met with confusion or immediately with some reference to Albuquerque and Breaking Bad. I usually say I grew up just north of El Paso, TX in New Mexico. It at least gives people a geographical area without explaining that NM is very large.
I do this with AZ. Everyone references Phoenix or Tucson, and I’m like, “you know Mexico? I’m 5 miles the way the crow flies from there.”
Post by RitzyHeifer on Jun 9, 2021 21:02:39 GMT -5
I’ll just chime in as someone from small town IL, about halfway between STL and Chicago that north of 80 = Chicago, south of 70 = St Louis regardless if it is in IL, IN, WI, or MO. Also, there is is St Charles in IL (Chicago) and MO (St Louis).
I’ll just chime in as someone from small town IL, about halfway between STL and Chicago that north of 80 = Chicago, south of 70 = St Louis regardless if it is in IL, IN, WI, or MO. Also, there is is St Charles in IL (Chicago) and MO (St Louis).
Literally was about to chime in with the dual St. Charles references. And are apparently very similar in many ways, geographical and otherwise.
Let's be honest, there are people in the states who still get confused about Iowa. DH is from Des Moines and it's a running joke that Iowa--Idaho--Ohio are frequently confused.
I've definitely run into that out here in Maryland. Most people I speak to here have never been to Iowa and it's not unusual to get it mixed up with other states.
Lol. I get Iowa and Ohio mixed up all the time. My cousin’s partner is from one and my dad has family who moved to the other one. I can never remember who lives where. We never see my dad’s family and I think they were together for 2-3 years before I realized that cousin’s partner was a mid-west transplant.