Post by bronxgirl on Sept 19, 2023 11:40:42 GMT -5
Oh, chile, I'm so sorry to hear this. What an awful situation. No one deserves to be treated this way, but especially you. You are such an amazing person and have been through way too much shit in your life. I hope this bastard rots and you finally find some peace. Hugs, friend.
You have always seemed like such a nice person/great Mom so I'm so sorry this has happened to you. He's a loser and you are better off without him. ((hugs))
What a piece of shit fucking loser. I'm so very sorry. Take care of yourself.
(I don't mean to project but may I highly recommend listening to Olivia Rodrigo when you're ready..every time I hear "Vampire" I think of a miserable cheating ex of mine and it feels so good to sing along. "How do you lie without flinching?" Indeed.)
Post by chilerellanos on Sept 19, 2023 17:04:31 GMT -5
I had therapy today.
And it was really good. First of all, my therapist was like… WOW. Wtf. I am not even going to try to use my professional language today because I just cannot.
I did finally tell her about some things that happened during the relationship that were quite bad. And some things he said, because I had a lot of shame that like… he said these things, or did these things. And I stayed. Even though, I did try to break up over them a few times and just couldn’t. He made it hard to leave him.
And I didn’t realize HOW manipulated I had become until I was out of the situation.
I am sure I’ll have shitty days. But I honestly feel really good today.
Post by Monica Geller on Sept 19, 2023 19:21:24 GMT -5
Wow. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. But I’m glad you have a therapist you can talk to and that today was good. He’s a POS and I hope he gets gets explosive and uncontrollable diarrhea the next time he’s hitting on some unsuspecting woman
Post by spindle92 on Sept 19, 2023 19:29:42 GMT -5
What an absolute piece of shit human being he is. I am so sorry this happened to you but be kind to yourself and let yourself feel what you need to feel.
I’m so sorry you’ve had to go through this. He’s a douche canoe. And you deserve so much better than him.
Good that you’re continuing with therapy. Being cheated on brings on a myriad of emotions and it ebbs and flows over time. I’ve been dealing with the effects of my ex-H’s infidelity for 3 years now, so I empathise with you.
Take care of yourself and give yourself a little grace during this time. Hugs!
I’m so sorry you’ve had to go through this. He’s a douche canoe. And you deserve so much better than him.
Good that you’re continuing with therapy. Being cheated on brings on a myriad of emotions and it ebbs and flows over time. I’ve been dealing with the effects of my ex-H’s infidelity for 3 years now, so I empathise with you.
Take care of yourself and give yourself a little grace during this time. Hugs!
I will say, it has really blown up in his face in a pretty spectacular way this week.
And I cannot see his reactions personally, but I’ve heard he is just absolutely panicking.
The skydiving girl apparently broke up with him this week also.
He’s very arrogant, and also has a very good reputation locally. So this is the thing that will really get to him.
I’d love to watch his rep burn in flames in some other locations as well (naval academy).
Post by wanderlustmom on Sept 21, 2023 6:26:17 GMT -5
I am so sorry you are going through this and so glad the therapy is helping! He is beyond words and beyond reproach. It’s hard to believe someone like him can keep getting out of bed and lying to this extent. I love that you bonded with the others that have been lied to and cheated on as well. I remember learning in my graduate school class in counseling about master manipulators can do this and anyone can fall under the “spell”. I’ve also seen close friends go through it
Post by somersault72 on Sept 21, 2023 9:40:51 GMT -5
I'm glad word is getting out about this shitbag, both so less women can be harmed by him AND because it bothers him so much. I am also glad you're on the road to healing. You are obviously a strong woman and will get through this but I am very sorry this happened to you. You deserve better. <3
Regarding what happened in your therapy. You said earlier in this thread that you worked so hard to figure out if you could trust him, you double-checked everything for a while, and there were no flags. I don’t know what he said or did that you overlooked that you just admitted to yourself and to your therapist, but those were probably your flags. If you were ashamed that he said them and you stayed, then they are almost definitely a mark of his bad character. Truly good guys won’t ever say anything that you’d be ashamed to repeat, even in an argument. That was your sign that he was willing to treat you badly.
AND you wanted to leave, which to me says you actually can trust yourself. You didn’t leave, so you have a little work to do with the last bit, but you knew. ❤️