Self Care Thread

[campermom]

What is everyone doing these days specifically?

I’m going to book myself a facial and dermaplaning. Someone here said they were getting facials regularly and people were noticing. Tell me more!

What are you all doing for yourselves these days?

[sdlaura]

I got a couple facials back before my wedding and felt like they did nothing. But maybe i need to try again.

One thing I enjoy every few months is going to a Korean spa. You soak naked in a hot tub and then lay on a cot next to other women while a Korean woman in a bra and underwear scrubs all your dead skin off. They are VERY thorough. Then they massage some oil back into your skin, peel and cut up a cucumber and put it on your eyes, and wash your hair. It hurts a bit, but my skin feels amazing after. My friends and I went to one in LA like 15 years ago and then I found a place in San Diego. My favorite is one I went to in Orange County. So they seem to be pretty prevalent in SoCal.

I get my hair colored (pretty close to my natural color but with some small non-bleach highlights). And I get eyelash extensions. I do my nails and self wax at home.

[dglvrk2]

It's small, but on weekend days, like today, I get up before everyone else, chill in my pj's and drink a cup of coffee. I don't have to talk to anyone and can clear my head, think a few positive thoughts, thoughts of gratitude or nothing at all.

Other small things, remembering to shave my legs, going dry/no alcohol a few nights a week and keeping my areas in my and H's bedroom clean help too.

I recently started getting facials once every six weeks or so. I really like them. sdlaura, I imagine you got married at least 12 years ago. Knowing myself 12+ years ago, I would not have appreciated facials the way I do now that being said, they're not for everyone.

[sdlaura]

dglvrk2 yep, that was 15 years ago this may, so things probably have changed a lot, and so have I and my skin!

I forgot my hair blow outs too. I have a subscription for two a month and my guy Angelo is amazing A blowout lasts about 6 days for my hair so it’s a good investment I feel like, and I find the process relaxing.

[macmars45]

Get up before H and DS(7) and drink coffee in silence.

Read books.

Ride my exercise bike or take a walk.

Talk to a friend on the phone 2-3x/month on Friday or Saturday nights after our kiddos are in bed.

[mommyatty]

Honestly? Not a lot. A bath a couple of times a week in my big bathtub. I shop for groceries alone.

I need to get better at this because I’m really close to burnout.

[186momx]

Right now not much. I try and sneak in a long shower once a week where I can use all the hot water and just let the water beat down on me. I've been trying to do my nails but even that seems to more a chore right now.

I have 4 more Fridays until I have them off again. I just need to survive that and then Tuesday nights I got 3 glorious hours of alone time at home.

[vasc]

I got Botox last month and have stepped up my skincare routine. Treated myself to some expensive products.

Yoga studio membership and attending classes at least 3x per week.

Walks with friends in the neighborhood.

[mae0111]

I am terrible about self care. My therapist keeps pointing this out to me. Like, any time I take for myself makes me feel terribly guilty.

I get my hair cut and colored every 6 weeks, but it feels more like a chore than relaxation and self-care. Walks are for the dog as much as me, and I feel guilty if I take a walk without him.

This spring I’m planning to walk the track during DD2’s soccer practices whenever I can. I need to take a weekend for myself, but it’s so hard to do with conflicting sports schedules and DH’s work schedule. I need to think of smaller things that I enjoy that can be sprinkled throughout my week…

[twinmomma]

I give myself a full manicure once a week at home. I have a whole set from Olive and June and I love it. I've always thought bright nail polish is really fun and this gives me an excuse to pause and slow down for a chunk of time once a week.

I'm not sure if this counts as "self care" but I think it is. I bought myself bigger jeans and bigger shorts. I've gained weight and decided that life is too short to stress about squeezing into pants that don't fit anymore. Do I wish I was still super skinny like I used to be? Sure. But I also accept that I'm pushing forty, have a thyroid that doesn't work, and am married to a man who cooks to show his love. So I'm just embracing this new shape that I am while still staying healthy.

[rere]

I hate getting my hair done, so not relaxing, but I do it every 6 weeks.

I just started regular messages, about every 5 to 6 weeks. I also run/walk/lift weights, which is good for my mental health.

Dh and I have started going to the driving range as weather permits which I really enjoy.

[mustardseed2007]

Therapy, although my therapist says that doesn't count as self care

Reading also.

[sdlaura]

twinmomma ITA that having clothes that fit is great self care! Good for you.

And mustardseed2007 reading happy ending rom-coms is definitely one of my favorite relaxing activities.

[librarychica]

twinmomma, clothes that fit and feel good are 100% self care.

For me self-care is prioritizing my own needs and interests occasionally and letting go of what I feel I “should” do. So sometimes I let the dishes sit to go to bed early with a book. I decline a kids birthday party because I have already planned to take the girls kayaking, I add an extra day to a work trip to have some time to myself rather than rushing home.

[mommyatty]

twinmomma- I don’t eat when I’m sad or really stressed. So for me, “fat and happy” is an actual thing. I look at pictures of times I was really thin, and I always remind myself of what beyond my weight was happening during that time. And when I see pictures and cringe because I’m my normal size 12 self, I remind myself of what was happening then too. So buy the bigger clothes, eat the food prepared with love, and just be happy!

Also, I’m very aware of what I’m telling my DD who is about the age of your DDs about the relative importance of a number on a scale. I want her to value health and happiness over being an “idiot stick figure without a soul”, to quote Carrie Bradshaw.

[k3am]

I walk daily and work out/do yoga at least 5 days a week. I read for entertainment. That's about it.

I was getting facials and massages pretty regularly but honestly they were great in the moment but didn't have a long-term noticeable impact and were $$$. I am contemplating getting a facial at a med spa vs. a spa and seeing if that's what makes the difference. But $$$$.

[soccermama]

Being in control of my health, at least trying to stay on top of it! Taking all of my daily meds and I'm trying to work up to walking at least 5x a week. I want to add in some strength training as well.

I love getting pedicures, I probably don't get them done as often as I would like. If I end up doing that 3-4x a year I call it a win! I don't care much about getting manicures, but it just makes me really happy when I have pretty toes.

[supertrooper1]

I strength train 3-4 days a week. I get a Brazilian wax and my eyebrows done about every 2 months. I only get my hair cut and colored twice a year even though I need to do it more often. I would love to get pedicures more often, but I only do that a few times a year. I like that Beau and DS will go get pedicures with me, but it adds up when they go too.

I feel guilty taking time and money to do things for myself. Ex-H would make me feel bad for taking time to do these things, and even though I've gotten better, I still have that internal feeling. Beau said his late W would spend $500+ on self care body maintenance. I'm very low maintenance compared to her but he would never say anything about how much money I spent or time. My other barrier is trying to plan these things when I don't have DS with me so I don't interfere with the little time I have with him as it is.

[sandandsea]

I went wild a few weeks ago and booked myself a haircut and a mammogram that happened last week and this week. Other than that not much. It’s so hard to find time for anything and when I do have a free moment I just want to veg. But I think I’m just recovering now because Dh and ds had 3 out of town weekends with racing all over the country and the. Dh had shoulder surgery last week so I’m in catch up mode.

[cjcouple]

Not much tbh.

I've started reading more and I try to walk every day outside and eat well.

[mommyatty]

sandandsea- I snorted when I read a mammogram as “self care”. But I’m supposed to schedule mine. I dread it, not because of the mammogram but because they always “see” something but then I have to go have an ultrasound, which takes forever because the ultrasound person can’t see whatever random thing the radiologist and mammogram tech thought they saw. So then another radiologist has to sign off that they aren’t missing the mystery spot. It’s maddening. So it becomes a whole day of “self care”, lol!

[librarychica]

mommyatty, that sounds tedious. I have to get a mammogram this spring because I am getting a breast reduction this summer. I’ve never had one and I am not looking forward to it.

[twinmomma]

sandandsea, mommyatty, keeping up with health appointments is definitely self care! Especially when it's easy for us to ignore our own health because we are dealing with doctor appointments for everyone else!

[186momx]

librarychica, I had my first mammogram last fall and I was dreading it because of how my mom always complains about it. I told the mammogram tech that I squish and shove my boobs into sports bras more than she squished them with the machine. She laughed.

[dglvrk2]

I'm supposed to schedule a colonoscopy sooner than later 😅 I KNOW they're important and self care, but don't want to take a whole day to be drugged etc

[mommyatty]

Mar 19, 2024 12:56:41 GMT -5 dglvrk2 said:

I'm supposed to schedule a colonoscopy sooner than later 😅 I KNOW they're important and self care, but don't want to take a whole day to be drugged etc

PSA- GO GET YOUR COLONOSCOPIES!! I had mine after rolling my eyes because they had moved up the requirement from 50 to 45. I’m one of the people they moved it up for. I had polyps that, if they had been left alone to grow, were highly likely to have been full blown colon cancer by the time I was 50. So seriously, pooping all day the day before and not eating sucks, but colon cancer sucks worse. And I have no history of any type of cancer in my family other than my brother who had esophageal cancer from decades of tobacco use.

[macmars45]

Mar 19, 2024 13:05:43 GMT -5 mommyatty said:

Mar 19, 2024 12:56:41 GMT -5 dglvrk2 said:

I'm supposed to schedule a colonoscopy sooner than later 😅 I KNOW they're important and self care, but don't want to take a whole day to be drugged etc

PSA- GO GET YOUR COLONOSCOPIES!! I had mine after rolling my eyes because they had moved up the requirement from 50 to 45. I’m one of the people they moved it up for. I had polyps that, if they had been left alone to grow, were highly likely to have been full blown colon cancer by the time I was 50. So seriously, pooping all day the day before and not eating sucks, but colon cancer sucks worse. And I have no history of any type of cancer in my family other than my brother who had esophageal cancer from decades of tobacco use.

Does anyone else worry about the not eating for medical stuff because they take meds that need to be taken with food in both the AM and PM? Just me? Colonoscopy with a side of a grand mal seizure sounds awful.

Like for giving birth I was elated that it started at 7am and ended at 7:20pm for that simple reason (I was induced). Giving birth with a side of a grand mal seizure would have complicated matters enormously and been devastating.

And sure missing a dose or two might be fine but the last grand mal I had was when I missed 0 doses. So.

Anyways.

[mommyatty]

@macmars45- most meds that say take with food don’t really need to be taken with food in order for them to work, it just prevents stomach upset if you take them with food. Including most seizure meds. Go get your colonoscopy! Your stomach is going to be upset anyway during the prep. Just ask your doctor what to do.

[sdlaura]

librarychica IMO a mammogram is SO NBD. I’d rather have a mammogram than a dental cleaning or a Pap smear any day. You’re in and out in like less than 10 minutes. I am not looking forward to colonoscopies - but will do them when I’m 45.

[mae0111]

I had a mammogram 10 days ago and I'm still sore. That lady basically assaulted me LOL. But no issues found this time, so I'm still calling it a win!