Post by starburst604 on Mar 31, 2024 20:11:25 GMT -5
Well, I did cry. Because I do a lot of that these days! But happier tears of relief this time. I finally told my dad a few days ago about the divorce. He’s south for the winter so it had to be by phone. I didn’t give any details, just that we were divorcing and selling the house. He was completely blindsided and didn’t know what to say- he’s a man of few words to begin with. He texted me earlier today, asking me to call him when I could talk privately. I was solo at the time so I did.
I knew that he had called my sister to “check in” the other day, knowing she would know more about what’s been going on. He told me he’s been looking at rental prices for a 2BR where I live, and really doesn’t want me to pay 3k+ a month and get no equity. My sister had told him that I was stressed because STBX said he won’t take a dog with him in his new apartment and there’s no way I’m finding a rental where I can take 2 cats and 2 big dogs. Having to rehome a dog would break DD’s heart. He’s also been combing home listings in our town and knows there’s nothing reasonable on the market right now.
So he wanted to give me some options, one of them being to move into my mom’s house for the summer, if she is willing to delay putting it on the market after she moves into her new condo. It would be a challenging commute, but my work isn’t far from where we live now so as far as coparenting, I at least have reason to be in the area. I will have to figure out logistics but I think I could make it work for the summer. He wants me to house hunt over the summer, and is willing to pay cash for a home for me, in his name so STBX can’t come after it in any way. He will transfer it to me after the divorce is final. It wouldn’t be an issue to have all the pets at my mom’s and I’d have a home of my own sooner than I had planned.
I talked to my mom about it at Easter today and she is game. I feel like a cinder block has been lifted off my chest because I’d rather deal with a tough commute for a time if it means we can keep our pets together. I’m also picturing showing DD all the spots in the woods behind my mom’s where me and my friends had forts growing up. She can see her cousins who live in that area more often. We’ll be near the beach again. The dogs will have a yard to play in and my mom said she’d help out with walking them during the day when I’m working. We won’t need a big house, just something cozy for me and DD with a little yard for the dogs.
I’m so incredibly thankful for my parents. Our relationship isn’t always exactly what I’d wish for, but they’re always there for me.
The best line from my dad today though, was that H will eventually move back to where he’s from and be the yacht club drunk. 💀💀💀
Post by emilyinchile on Mar 31, 2024 20:34:36 GMT -5
This is WONDERFUL. What amazing parents you have. And hopefully it makes you feel like you're also doing something right in life if they're both pitching in like this.
Post by maudefindlay on Mar 31, 2024 21:22:17 GMT -5
You were due for happy news. I hope you find a great house for you to make new memories in with your DD. And know that this will really piss off your stbxh that he is in an apartment and you will be in your own home.
This made me tear up. I am so glad you have such a great support system around you. And what an amazing thing for them to be able to offer you as you go through this process.
I’m so glad your parents are being supportive, and are able to help you find a place to stay. It sounds like a huge relief, which you really deserve right now. You got this!!!
That is amazing news!!! I know exactly what you mean in the last line bc I have the same parents - not the greatest relationship (better now though that we live apart) but they’d do anything for us.
You were due for happy news. I hope you find a great house for you to make new memories in with your DD. And know that this will really piss off your stbxh that he is in an apartment and you will be in your own home.
Oh it will eat him up, which of course will get flung at me in the form of “how lucky that daddy’s money rescued you, etc”. I don’t care. I would do the same for DD in a heartbeat in the future if I had the means. My dad isn’t a flashy man of wealth, he was a plumber who was smart with money from a young age and invested wisely enough to build a very comfortable nest egg.
What an amazing plan! Love that your parents are coming together to support you and DD and the pets.
And your DD is seeing what coparenting can look like even with adult children. Your parents are working together to keep your guys safe and together with the pets.
I can only imagine the weight this lifts from your chest. How wonderful of your parents to step in and help set you up in your new life. Don’t listen to whatever barbs your STBX throws, you’re doing what’s best for your DD in the middle of the shit storm he started so he can’t go F himself.
oh my god, that just made ME do a sigh of relief and I have no skin in the game! I am so pleased that they are going to help you out and what a blessing to not have to worry so much. I am glad you are feeling supported. What a change from DB asshole STBX.
How was the weekend? Any response from him yet re: "skiing"?
That's amazing. Sometimes dads really are the best. Mine is also one of few words, I get that part.
Real estate is part of what is stressing me out in getting this process off the ground. It's exactly what your dad said - throwing away the money without equity at this stage of my life.