Tuesday Randoms

[jinkies]

We hung out with a couple of H's coworkers yesterday. I had met both of them before, but only very briefly. But he talks about them/work all the time, so I feel like I know them better than I actually do, I guess.

Anyway. When we got there, H did say something along the lines of "I think you've met before?" and I said "yes, briefly at X party, good to see you" etc. I didn't register whether he explicitly said my name in the introduction. I didn't need their names because I hear about them every night.

We were HOURS into hanging out when it became clear that at least one of them did not know my name. But by then it felt weird to introduce myself-- there were only 6 of us and we'd been hanging out together for half the day. I didn't really know what to do, so I just let her call me "wifey" for the remaining time we spent together.

I wfh and spend most of my time alone and I feel like I've lost all social skills. So awkward.

[circa1978]

My DS 13 is a hoarder of his ADHD doom piles, as is his dad. I'm a purger, so it's a constant struggle, but it came to a head this weekend because we're getting new carpet in all the bedrooms, and I needed him to tackle all the clutter under his bed and in/under/on top of the furniture we needed to move. So, we did some parallel task completion and I'm going drawer by drawer in the shelving unit on his wall. We get to the last set of drawers, and he's really serious and was like, please do not open those. And all kinds of scenarios are going through my mind of what's in there. It turns out it was hoarded school work from back to like 4th grade, lol. He was like DO NOT throw it away. (I did not and I love my kid.)

[tennisgal]

gummybear I'd print up the bus schedule for the neighbors lol

[renna]

Sept 3, 2024 8:22:42 GMT -5 gummybear said:

Sept 3, 2024 8:12:59 GMT -5 jinkies said:

gummybear audacity is at an all time high.

I'd be torn about whether to ignore the request entirely or just send a laughing emoji. And then "no".

People never cease to amaze me.

Because she is a nice person DD “felt mean” saying no 

I hope your daughter can see that she has done a good thing for herself by protecting herself. She is being very smart in putting herself first here. GOOD FOR HER!

Also, I would want to respond "Our lawyer has advised against this." (I wouldn't, but I would want to!)

(I know I would feel like a mean person, too, but also I would be thinking how long until somehow this person turned on me AGAIN, and I would not be up for that.) Your daughter did great!

[dish2501]

It was a lovely long weekend. We hosted 30 people on Sunday. My husband cooked a 22lb brisket. It nearly all went. We also got chicken from a local restaurant that is absolutely my favorite fried chicken.

We went apple and blackberry picking yesterday. The blackberries are thumb sized.

My freshman DD makes fun of me for putting 2 spaces after a period in my texts. Her friend was reading my texts over DD’s shoulder and they had a good laugh over their old Gen X moms. Apparently, sending paragraphs in text is old person too. 🤪

[bears]

To continue the saga of volleyball tryouts: DD was hardcore saying she wouldn't make the team, didn't want to bother trying out all weekend. Despite that, she spent some time practicing and even went to a clinic one evening. She kept on reserving the right to change her mind.

Well, this morning she was a complete disaster (completely disorganized and anxious), but packed her knee pads without prompting (she said "this doesn't mean I'm trying out"), and texted from the bus stop that she would be trying out.

I'm so glad, but I wish she had more confidence in herself! I think if she had gone into this process believing in herself, it would reflect in her skills! Why can't she believe in herself as much as MH and I do?!

[starburst604]

Speaking of cleaners, I haven't had one since moving. I COULD pay for it but it's hard to justify I guess. I've been keeping up ok, but I'm wondering how I'm going to do once DD is recovered and sports go full throttle for us. No more unscheduled Sat/Sun mornings to spend a few hours cleaning. I guess I'll see how it goes and decide. I think what's holding me back is I got STBX to split the cost of dog daycare with me because it's expensive with 2 dogs, but if he sees I have a cleaner coming he'll be like wtf. But the dogs are also the reason it's hard to keep up!

I have what seems to be tendonitis of the left Achilles and it SUCKS. I felt it come on mildly while I was at OTF on the treadmill last week so I just slowed down and didn't notice it after that. On Saturday when I took DD whale watching, we were in the car when I realized I'd forgotten to have our parking ticket validated at the restaurant. I pulled over in a no parking zone and tried to quickly run back to the restaurant and within the first few steps BOOM, intense pain and I've been hobbling since. The pain is on and off and I've been icing and taking Advil. It SUCKS when I have to walk the dogs and I'm so annoyed that I have been working really hard at OTF and am feeling good and now I have to take a break. It's almost just like last summer when I'd gotten in a good groove with running again and then went over on my ankle in a pothole and it didn't feel normal for weeks. WHY?!

[holly116]

My hair is shedding at a rate that has made me uncomfortable and I have a ton of hair. Postpartum-level shedding every time I wash it or even brush it. My resting heart rate has also dropped over the last 5 weeks (thanks, Apple watch) which at first I thought was a good thing, but post googling I realized it could be not great.

I still feel like my hands and face/neck have swelling/are poofy. It was explained by the extra weight I was carrying for a while, but I've dropped a bit and in the past when I've been at my current weight, I could certainly wear rings that I can't wear right now.

I have literally been tested for what feels like everything under the sun in the last year by both my allergist and my functional medicine doctor and it feels like I'm no closer to figuring out whatever is going on with my body. I'm on a million supplements (prescribed by my functional medicine doctor) and I don't know whether any of them are helping or hurting. Except for the adrenal support electrolyte thing I drink every morning. I do feel noticeably better since starting that.

The latest finding was a mold blood test that came back with both IgG and IgE reactions to mycotoxins, so I'm about 6 weeks into a 4-6 month plan of a prescription anti-fungal medication. I know mold exposure stuff is sort of woo and I don't entirely buy that this is the real problem.

I emailed my doctor about the hair and heart rate and she asked about recent covid or other illnesses, which is only possible if I was completely asymptomatic. I've luckily been pretty healthy recently. I have more blood work scheduled next month, maybe she'll test my thyroid again? Everything was normal a year ago.

[midwestmama]

gummybear, there are no words. The utter audacity of that girl and her request.

It was a nice 4-day weekend (I took last Friday off due to a number of appointments), that involved time with friends, time with family, time to chill by myself, and get a few small decluttering/organizing projects done around the house. I also survived round 2 of school clothes shopping with DD (13), lol.

[lavenderblue]

I have a WWYD that doesn't deserve it's own post. I've lost some weight, 70lbs total, 40lbs since April. I did a closet purge this weekend. I bagged up all of my too-big clothes and then just put them back in my closet. DD says that I should get rid of them, but I'm terrified I'm going to gain the weight back again and need them. I've been struggling with my weight my entire adult life and as much as I want this to be the last time I go on a WLJ, I can't say with any certainty that that will be true.

So, WWYD, keep the clothes or donate?

[expectantsteelerfan]

Sept 3, 2024 9:25:40 GMT -5 circa1978 said:

My DS 13 is a hoarder of his ADHD doom piles, as is his dad. I'm a purger, so it's a constant struggle, but it came to a head this weekend because we're getting new carpet in all the bedrooms, and I needed him to tackle all the clutter under his bed and in/under/on top of the furniture we needed to move. So, we did some parallel task completion and I'm going drawer by drawer in the shelving unit on his wall. We get to the last set of drawers, and he's really serious and was like, please do not open those. And all kinds of scenarios are going through my mind of what's in there. It turns out it was hoarded school work from back to like 4th grade, lol. He was like DO NOT throw it away. (I did not and I love my kid.)

I can relate to this so much.  Glad you made so much progress.  My ds is in 10th grade, and I've pretty much accepted (and told him) that if he doesn't make any progress on his own stuff, that when he graduates and (hopefully!) moves out for school, I will be throwing it all away.

[spindle92]

Today is day 27 in the hospital with my mom and I am looking for humor anywhere I can find it.

we have started talking about transitional rehab facilities and explaining to her what it involves.
Yesterday she goes "Do I have to chores there?"

I don't know if it's because I am so tired or what, but I found this question hysterical.

[expectantsteelerfan]

Sept 3, 2024 11:45:50 GMT -5 lavenderblue said:

I have a WWYD that doesn't deserve it's own post. I've lost some weight, 70lbs total, 40lbs since April. I did a closet purge this weekend. I bagged up all of my too-big clothes and then just put them back in my closet. DD says that I should get rid of them, but I'm terrified I'm going to gain the weight back again and need them. I've been struggling with my weight my entire adult life and as much as I want this to be the last time I go on a WLJ, I can't say with any certainty that that will be true.

So, WWYD, keep the clothes or donate?

I've also lost weight (due to Wegovy) and gotten new smaller clothes and had to clear out old clothes.  My bff was great in helping me decide to get rid of MOST of it right away.  She pointed out that if I did gain weight back, it would likely not be for a while, and at that point styles might have changed and I would want new stuff anyway.  For stuff that is more expensive to replace or special pieces I really liked, I do put them away for a little bit, but after 6 months if it's still there being unworn, I have been much more willing to get rid of it.  

Also, I've found it more fulfilling to give stuff away on Buy Nothing than just dumping it at Good Will.  I will post a garbage bag of size whatever clothes, and someone will always take them.  And every once in a while there will be people hosting refugees or post about a woman starting over and needing clothes in a size I had a pile of, so I give to them.  I definitely had stuff either still with tags or that I had only worn once that I got rid of, so at least I felt like someone else would use it.

[blondemoment123]

gummybear "I think the fuck not"'

[beerlover]

Yeesh, it's been a busy day back after a long weekend. DS had a counseling appointment at 11, so I had to pick him up from school, take him there, mess around for an hour while he was doing that plus get him lunch to eat in the car, take him back to school, then pick up groceries since we were gone all weekend. All while WFH. Thankfully, I was able to keep up with things on my phone and not too much came in.

DS's counselor is leaving this practice to start her own. This actually works out well for me because I did not like the idea of him missing school for counseling, and she thinks the two new therapists coming in will have evening hours. I just sent an email to the office manager reiterating that whoever they put him with needs to have evening hours. I am also fine with the change because DS told me that he asked her who she was voting for and she said Trump, so. Eyeroll. I mean, DS shouldn't have asked that but she shouldn't have answered either, lol. As a counselor myself I can't imagine how ANY other counselor could support him or Republicans at all honestly but I am in Central PA so what do you expect.

I need to get a few solid hours of work in here before I need to get DS and run him to soccer at 4pm. Who are these working parents who can make it to 4pm practices?! (I mean, I am one of them, but this has to be hard for others).

[ssmjlm]

I asked for my car to be ready at 3pm and it was 1:45 when I started calling because I had heard nothing. Well no one at the service dept answered. I finally figured out how to get the operator who tells me there is 1 person working the service desk and the service manager isn't on site.

Now I'm still waiting on a call back.

ETA: I tried calling at 230 and no answer. It's now past when I asked to have the vehicle ready and we have a passport appt after work for E. So I basically need to be picking up the car at 4.

[mysteriouswife]

Weird or not weird?

I am getting a pedi. They are using a disposable kit that includes a nail file and pumice. Would it be weird for me to ask for them?

[sarahsays]

Sept 3, 2024 14:36:20 GMT -5 mysteriouswife said:

Weird or not weird?

I am getting a pedi. They are using a disposable kit that includes a nail file and pumice. Would it be weird for me to ask for them?

Not weird. My nail person offers me the file she uses since she's going to throw it away if I don't take it.

[ny96]

We had a very nice weekend away aside from an expensive visit to the San Diego Zoo where the kids spent the whole time complaining about walking, the lack of snacks and drinks, and just being bored. I think that is probably our last visit to the zoo, any zoo.

Yesterday morning we got up and went to the hotel pool and DS1, without checking with us, went to the pool bar and charged an ice cream bar and a lemonade to the room. I’m a little surprised at his gall, and then when we said we’d take it out of his allowance he tried to argue that his brother had some sips of the lemonade so he shouldn’t be expected to pay for all of it.

[bears]

Sept 3, 2024 15:05:03 GMT -5 ny96 said:

Yesterday morning we got up and went to the hotel pool and DS1, without checking with us, went to the pool bar and charged an ice cream bar and a lemonade to the room. I’m a little surprised at his gall, and then when we said we’d take it out of his allowance he tried to argue that his brother had some sips of the lemonade so he shouldn’t be expected to pay for all of it.

I would be pissed as a parent, but this made me giggle. Kids are ridiculous.

[ny96]

The post about the SIL made me remember that on Sunday night we returned to our hotel after dinner and the kids (11 and 7) were begging to go back in the pool. H turned to me and asked genuinely “we can’t let them go by themselves, can we?”. 😳

[momin2013]

Sept 3, 2024 14:36:20 GMT -5 mysteriouswife said:

Weird or not weird?

I am getting a pedi. They are using a disposable kit that includes a nail file and pumice. Would it be weird for me to ask for them?

100% not weird - in fact, they may even offer it to you. If they don’t, though, definitely ask for it.

[mysteriouswife]

Sept 3, 2024 15:11:25 GMT -5 bears said:

Sept 3, 2024 15:05:03 GMT -5 ny96 said:

Yesterday morning we got up and went to the hotel pool and DS1, without checking with us, went to the pool bar and charged an ice cream bar and a lemonade to the room. I’m a little surprised at his gall, and then when we said we’d take it out of his allowance he tried to argue that his brother had some sips of the lemonade so he shouldn’t be expected to pay for all of it.

I would be pissed as a parent, but this made me giggle. Kids are ridiculous.

The hustle of splitting the cost is amazing. Kids are clever beast.

[deadwing]

Sept 3, 2024 9:24:12 GMT -5 jinkies said:

We hung out with a couple of H's coworkers yesterday. I had met both of them before, but only very briefly. But he talks about them/work all the time, so I feel like I know them better than I actually do, I guess.

Anyway. When we got there, H did say something along the lines of "I think you've met before?" and I said "yes, briefly at X party, good to see you" etc. I didn't register whether he explicitly said my name in the introduction. I didn't need their names because I hear about them every night.

We were HOURS into hanging out when it became clear that at least one of them did not know my name. But by then it felt weird to introduce myself-- there were only 6 of us and we'd been hanging out together for half the day. I didn't really know what to do, so I just let her call me "wifey" for the remaining time we spent together.

I wfh and spend most of my time alone and I feel like I've lost all social skills. So awkward.

My social skills (which have never been good) have completely gone to shit since I started WFH full time.

Your story reminded me of the time I was hanging out with a bunch of college friends a few years after we all graduated. One person had met and fallen in love with a foreign exchange student while we were in school. Unfortunately, none of us were sure of her first name and it had been way too long for it to be reasonable to ask. One guy's girlfriend was drunk and thought she had the perfect solution - she asked the woman how to spell her name. Which turned out to be very simple to spell and say. 10+ years later I'm still grateful for that awkward question because my friend ultimately married her.

[fluffycookie]

Our pup with the ear infection, broken tooth and growth in her mouth went to the vet today for the second dose of medication for her ear and the vet tech asked me if they had told us about the two lumps on her neck. This was the first I was hearing about it. When we found out about the growth in her mouth we decided to have it removed with the tooth, but not biopsied because we would not subject her to chemo/treatment if it was cancerous. She hates the car and vet and becomes so stressed out that I am always nervous something is going to happen to her. If we did treatment it would be torture to her and stress her out so bad. Now we need to decide if we biopsy the lumps. I feel so bad and feel like we are letting her down and the vet will judge us, but I would rather her spend her days cared for and comfortable and not in the car/vets shaking like a leaf and panting, drooling trying to escape from the room or hide behind me. Please someone tell me we aren't bad people.

[fluffycookie]

Sept 3, 2024 15:32:19 GMT -5 ny96 said:

The post about the SIL made me remember that on Sunday night we returned to our hotel after dinner and the kids (11 and 7) were begging to go back in the pool. H turned to me and asked genuinely “we can’t let them go by themselves, can we?”. 😳

We were at a hockey tournament once, the kids were probably 12/13 at the time.  They wanted to go to the pool and we told them they needed an adult and they said Coach W said he would be the adult.  Imaging the laugh when we ran into Coach W coming out of the brewery as we were walking in and I said I thought you had the kids at the pool...lol. In the end they did have an adult just not Coach W who had no clue that they had "volunteered" him.

[pinkdutchtulips]

It was an exhausting weekend .. we moved! The PD were not needed    but that doesn't mean it was a smooth move. Digging out from boxes and getting stuff organized when combining 2 households is far from easy. Miss R's anxiety has been going out of control at night. Ellie dawg has been getting adjusted to the new place. She's sleeping better now thank god BUT she got a tri tip off the counter last night. J left it there and turned his head for 2 mins and when we looked over, she was happily chewing on a perfectly grilled tri tip   

Miss R told me that she wants to attempt school. Her new district offers a special school for kids like her w small classes and lots of therapists. She wants to start at 2-3 class periods a day and build from there. I'm waiting to hear back for her neuropsyche eval so we know definitively what we're dealing with. Once we've got that, I'll look at next steps. 

I've been feeling like I'm completely losing my mind - R needs something, J needs something, I need to see what E is getting into ... a million things at once and I can't think, can't focus. I'm stressed. 

[penguingrrl]

Sept 3, 2024 17:26:39 GMT -5 pinkdutchtulips said:

It was an exhausting weekend .. we moved! The PD were not needed    but that doesn't mean it was a smooth move. Digging out from boxes and getting stuff organized when combining 2 households is far from easy. Miss R's anxiety has been going out of control at night. Ellie dawg has been getting adjusted to the new place. She's sleeping better now thank god BUT she got a tri tip off the counter last night. J left it there and turned his head for 2 mins and when we looked over, she was happily chewing on a perfectly grilled tri tip   

Miss R told me that she wants to attempt school. Her new district offers a special school for kids like her w small classes and lots of therapists. She wants to start at 2-3 class periods a day and build from there. I'm waiting to hear back for her neuropsyche eval so we know definitively what we're dealing with. Once we've got that, I'll look at next steps. 

I've been feeling like I'm completely losing my mind - R needs something, J needs something, I need to see what E is getting into ... a million things at once and I can't think, can't focus. I'm stressed. 

I’m sorry you’re stressed but cheering for Miss R wanting school! It sounds like a similar program to the school my daughter is in and it has been amazing. She even made 12 days in a row over ESY! The small classes and tons of social workers plus a 1:1 aide have made it so going in is possible and she’s participating! Fingers crossed for the same for you and Miss R!

[Monica Geller]

I miss being active here. I check in every once in a while but just don’t have the ability to keep up any more. I miss this community.

[TR]

Sept 3, 2024 16:12:09 GMT -5 fluffycookie said:

Our pup with the ear infection, broken tooth and growth in her mouth went to the vet today for the second dose of medication for her ear and the vet tech asked me if they had told us about the two lumps on her neck. This was the first I was hearing about it. When we found out about the growth in her mouth we decided to have it removed with the tooth, but not biopsied because we would not subject her to chemo/treatment if it was cancerous. She hates the car and vet and becomes so stressed out that I am always nervous something is going to happen to her. If we did treatment it would be torture to her and stress her out so bad. Now we need to decide if we biopsy the lumps. I feel so bad and feel like we are letting her down and the vet will judge us, but I would rather her spend her days cared for and comfortable and not in the car/vets shaking like a leaf and panting, drooling trying to escape from the room or hide behind me. Please someone tell me we aren't bad people.

I would even if we weren’t going to treat it, just to know what we’re dealing with and to monitor her more closely. Like, if it’s not cancer then I would be able to relax a bit and not over analyze if she’s tired one day or something. But if I know it’s cancer, I’d be more on the lookout for changes in behavior that might indicate she’s feeling worse and it’s time to let her go peacefully before it gets really bad. Whereas if you don’t know, you may unknowingly let things go until she’s in really obvious pain. I hope that makes sense.