Randoms

[mommyatty]

It’s just occurring to me how stupid homework is. DS’s elementary has a no homework policy. All the research shows homework doesn’t help kids learn. As an adult, I don’t have homework. So why do we do this to kids? I’ve never really questioned it, but I am now. And I’m very “what the hell is this preparing them for” about it.

[rere]

No idea what I've done here.

[rere]

Oct 11, 2024 8:07:54 GMT -5 rere said:

Oct 11, 2024 8:05:25 GMT -5 mommyatty said:

It’s just occurring to me how stupid homework is. DS’s elementary has a no homework policy. All the research shows homework doesn’t help kids learn. As an adult, I don’t have homework. So why do we do this to kids? I’ve never really questioned it, but I am now. And I’m very “what the hell is this preparing them for” about it.

That was my rant when my kids were is school. I actually dreaded that part if the day. They are there for most of the day. They need time to decompress at home. Especially if they have other activities, which are also beneficial.

When I taught, I tried not to give much. Maybe some reading or studying for an exam. But we had block schedule which I liked. It was 4 classes a day and they were around 1.5 hrs long. No one needs to talk for 1.5 hrs, so the second half was usually working on a project, individual work that would normally be homework.

[librarychica]

I feel the best balance is moderate math homework (i do think math is something that benefits from extra, independent practice), independent reading, and projects there’s not time for in the school day. Less than 30 minutes worth until they start getting to middle. The worksheets and apps that some teachers pile on elementary schoolers seemed a waste of time. I got into a bit of an argument with DD1’s second grade teacher over this. I could not see why she should spend an hour each evening doing repetitive apps when she already had proficiency in that skill, when we had such short evenings together and she needed her sleep. 15 minutes, sure, but an hour a day?

[sdlaura]

We don't really have any homework in elementary school - kids are just supposed to read daily. I love it. DD's 6th grade teacher (still elementary here) did give them some homework to prepare for middle school, and now DD has some homework in 7th grade, but mostly just for her honors classes. So I think if she wasn't taking those, she still wouldn't have much that she couldn't get done at school. The main thing for her that homework teaches her is just time management. Like "I'm really busy tomorrow night, and I have this assignment due the next day, so I should do it now." But 15 minutes of homework teaches her that, not hours.

[mae0111]

DD2 has been absolutely loaded down with homework for the past few weeks (6th grade). Every subject, 20-30 mins. In addition, she has to do 45 mins on a math app, and 45 mins on a vocab app. The school makes them do the vocab app through 11th grade, I believe, because there are some proven stats about how much it helps with the SATs. I can't tell if DD2 is really getting a ton of work, or if she's really inefficient, or both. I told her last night that she has to do her homework in the kitchen with me going forward, because I think she's getting distracted while working online. But I wish they'd ease up a bit.

DD1, on the other hand, is possibly TOO efficient, and has not brought homework home all semester as a 9th grader. All of her grades seem OK - low A's and high B's in standard classes (her school has honors, standard, and "basic" - she's in the middle), with the exception of History. Her history teacher is new to the school and is not acclimating well. He's piling on work, but can't keep up with his own grading, so the kids are churning out writing assignments with no feedback, which is terrible.

[supertrooper1]

Since 1st grade, DS has only had reading for homework. In primary and elementary school, 20 minutes were required every night. I thought it might change in middle school, but so far he has 30 minutes of reading and may have occasional assignments that he didn't finish in school. This year he's only had one thing to finish and it was an artsy welcome back to school assignment that wasn't a big deal. I'm not sure if this will change in high school.

[AdaraMarie]

I think it makes sense in a lot of ways, but now that my kid is taking all honors and ap classes in 9th grade the fact that she's never had to do homework has been pretty hard. She has no practice or discipline to do work on her own and she gets mad that how dare they expect her to do work at home 🙄
In hindsight a middle ground would have been nice.

[mommyatty]

AdaraMarie- She’s not wrong. I resent the hell out of it when I have to work evenings or weekends.

[AdaraMarie]

Oct 11, 2024 16:30:52 GMT -5 mommyatty said:

AdaraMarie- She’s not wrong. I resent the hell out of it when I have to work evenings or weekends.

True, but it is unreasonable to expect them to provide enough class time for the kids to study for exams.

[k3am]

DD had basically no homework in elementary. Middle school has been a LOT.

She's benefiting the most from homework in math and social studies. Math, because apparently they don't review homework or classwork (you get 100% for submitting something that has numbers on it, no review of it), their only "do you know how to do math?" check in is tests. So doing homework is a chance for us to figure out if she knows the info or not BEFORE the test, and gives me a chance to teach her when she (mostly) doesn't.

Social studies isn't particularly hard assignments, but she is learning the absolute most from it. But not specifically learning social studies. She's learning how to study, how to budget time on longer projects, etc. She thinks this teacher is so cringe, but I think he's really the only teacher that's forcing her to grow.

We haven't really had much in the way of homework in ELA or science - only finish what wasn't finished in class type stuff.

[186momx]

No real homework for middle school but from what I hear from the girls who are now in high school, they have tons of it and don't know how to manage time to get it done.
DD has a book report that is due January X and is supposed to be reading 5 pages a night to have finished reading the book by winter break and then that gives her a month to do the report. She also has a science project due in June and the teacher talks about it but doesn't give out any info until spring so DD can't do it early when she has more time if she wanted to.
My vent is I hate these long ass deadlines because it just teaches the kids to put crap off especially when they don't have check in deadlines to keep them on task.

[mommyatty]

A friend added me to this Facebook group where this woman basically sells used high fashion items. Lots are good deals like Lulemon stuff and cute designer dresses. But recently she’s had a lot of Louis Vuitton stuff. She says it’s been authenticated but I cannot imagine spending $650 on a purse. Let alone a USED purse. On FACEBOOK. Omg. And I love me a good Coach purse or a good Dooney and Bourke. But those really are my upper limit.

Y’all. $650. For a USED PURSE. She also has a LV weekender for like $1200.

I just can’t.

[sdlaura]

mommyatty I don’t understand designer bags at all. I don’t want to have to worry about damaging it all the time, or getting sunscreen on it or whatever. Target bags are fine for me.

[rere]

My thoughts are for $1200, I can get some plane tickets and some money towards a trip. I can't imagine that on a purse.

[mae0111]

I agree re: purses. I literally don’t even know what I’m supposed to like or carry. I always have either just a wristlet or a giant tote. I have a Coach crossbody that is literally 25 years old that I break out here and there. I could do so many better things with $675 or $1200.

I feel similarly about shoes as I’ve gotten older. Sneakers, boots occasionally, Toms if I can’t wear sneakers. I don’t know what I would do if I had to put on a pair of heels. I spend a lot on sneakers for good reason, but no cares about stylish shoes.

[dglvrk2]

mommyatty, I spent this weekend in Las Vegas with girlfriends. I always wanted to "try on" a Fendi purse because I like the way most of them look. I tried on said purse and it certainly looked nicer than my REI cross-body bag, but not $3400 - yes $3400- nicer.
I can really appreciate a nice purse, but, even if I was infinitely wealthy, I'd never spend even a fraction of this on a purse.

[waverly]

Oct 14, 2024 20:19:19 GMT -5 mommyatty said:

A friend added me to this Facebook group where this woman basically sells used high fashion items. Lots are good deals like Lulemon stuff and cute designer dresses. But recently she’s had a lot of Louis Vuitton stuff. She says it’s been authenticated but I cannot imagine spending $650 on a purse. Let alone a USED purse. On FACEBOOK. Omg. And I love me a good Coach purse or a good Dooney and Bourke. But those really are my upper limit.

Y’all. $650. For a USED PURSE. She also has a LV weekender for like $1200.

I just can’t.

Our work training (everything is a scam), along with watching documentaries, and the number of fake purse sellers in NYC when I lived there, has me convinced that these purses are fakes. 

Also, can we not add people to groups without their permission?  I had someone add me 3 times to some random southern clothes boutique.  Finally, FB came up with the option of not allowing them to add you anymore to that group, so that finally solved it.  

[k3am]

I am also in the camp of "I don't understand expensive purses." I had to buy "nicer" stuff for work, but the smallest Kate Spade on clearance still felt wasted on me.

They are not an investment for me. I know they're considered that for some people, but there are about zero things I've purchased that survive well in my care, I'm pretty sure I'd use a fancy purse once and manage to spill tea on it seconds before shivving a hole into the side with my car keys. I'd be too terrified to USE a purse that cost $650 USED. I can't even drive my sister's BMW for fear of ruining it. I refused to drive DH's car until he'd already gotten a scratch in the paint. I know myself, so easily lost/damaged luxury items just aren't it for me.

[mommyatty]

All day on my iPad and iPhone, I could not get to GBCN. Also couldn’t get Tapatalk to sign in. I missed you guys!

[twinmomma]

Is this where I confess that I treated myself to a used LV crossbody bag last week? I love bags and usually stick with Coach or Michael Kors. I've actually found some at Goodwill around me before, which is a major score! But a friend of a friend has a consignment business selling used high end bags and I fell in love with this LV one and watched it for weeks. I finally decided to bite the bullet and buy it. It was $350, which feels absolutely outrageous, but also... I work really hard and most of my clothes and things are from Target and Marshall's. So I decided to splurge on myself.

[rere]

twinmomma I splurged on a Michael Kors bag, but it was from TJ MAXX. So around the $175 price range. That's about as splurgy as I will get on something that's not furniture, trips, or jewelry.

[mae0111]

twinmomma, if that is your splurge, that's your splurge and good for you!! Such a splurge would be wasted on me, but I have other splurges. I just literally wouldn't even know where to start when looking at nice purses. I also wouldn't know where to start when looking at classic cars or something... They're nice to look at, but I know nothing...

[mommyatty]

twinmomma, I have paid $300 for a purse. I am really, REALLY hard on bags, and I have found I spend less money overall if I get a nicer one because they are pretty darned indestructible. I have bags I’ve had for two decades that are still in great shape and are classic so don’t go out of style. So splurge away!

But I still cannot fathom spending $650 on a used purse I’ve never even seen in person! Or frankly even if I did see it in person. I feel the same way about shoes. I buy good shoes. I do not buy $1000 shoes.

[sdlaura]

twinmomma, I assume you’re not to the Botox stage yet, and I spend more than $350 on occasional Botox, so we all have different splurges

[supertrooper1]

Beau's sister is one that resells her LV purses. She has a time share in Hawaii at a resort that has a LV store and buys one every time she goes. She'll use it a few times and then sell it. I buy Coach, but I can't bring myself to buy a regular department store Coach purse, it has to be outlet prices.

[mommyatty]

supertrooper1, places like Marshall’s and TJMaxx have great deals on good purses. I bought a Karl Lagerfeld that’s normally almost $500 for something like $80. The Coach outlet bags aren’t as high quality as their non-outlet bags. Which irritates me to no end. Our Marshall’s often has Coach bags.

[erbear]

My daughter (15) wants to go to a Don Toliver show at Tenple with two friends (both 16). Temple is in not in a great part of Philly (like…they had to run off the field at at field hockey game yesterday bc of gunfire in the area). I’m not worried about the show itself but I’m nervous to have them have to wait outside for someone to pick them up after the show. What say you, working parents? Let her go?

[sdlaura]

erbear that’s a tough one. I’d say probably not at 15. I grew up near DC. When I was 16 or 17 I was allowed to drive friends to a concert on the other side of the capitol beltway after practicing driving on it with my dad. But the concert itself was in a safe area. My parents would not have let me go into DC without an adult to a not great area to attend a concert. But then with you guys living in a city, your kids are probably more street smart than I was/my kids will be. So I totally wouldn’t judge you if you let her.

[erbear]

Oct 17, 2024 23:46:14 GMT -5 sdlaura said:

erbear that’s a tough one. I’d say probably not at 15. I grew up near DC. When I was 16 or 17 I was allowed to drive friends to a concert on the other side of the capitol beltway after practicing driving on it with my dad. But the concert itself was in a safe area. My parents would not have let me go into DC without an adult to a not great area to attend a concert. But then with you guys living in a city, your kids are probably more street smart than I was/my kids will be. So I totally wouldn’t judge you if you let her.

That’s my conundrum. She’s relatively street smart. She’ll be with (slightly older) friends. She’s not driving — we’d drop them off and pick them up or we’ll all take the train together. I’m just concerned about random guns in Philadelphia.