Its FRIDAY! FFFC!

[AndyCohen]

Also I will say that my H is only half-bad. He will totally hang with Audrey when I want to go out. He's just not a morning person and always has work to do 24/7.

[kistjenn]

Thanks!!!

[nannerl]

Apr 26, 2013 8:59:13 GMT -5 kdrake8 said:

Mine is that I am blatantly harassing my realtor and I know but I can't stop.

Guys, they NEVER communicated with us at all! We didn't offer THAT low that they shouldn't even counter offer, ESP with NO other offers in 6 weeks. Yesterday was supposed to be the deadline.

So, I may have both text and emailed the realtor already this morning. But shit, I want to KNOWWWWW wtaf is going on.

I feel like a crazy stalkerish high school girl with a crush.

::hands kdrake a popsicle::

You can come sit on the crazy couch with me.

We were supposed to get keys to our house today, but we're not and I don't know why or when the issue will be resolved (there was some muttering about final approval of lease agreement or something). If I had the contact info for these people, I'd totally be up their inboxes right now, so I guess it's a good thing I don't know who they are.

[laurack]

Apr 26, 2013 9:35:26 GMT -5 @smudgee said:

Maybe I am overly sensitive right now or such but I feel so extremely picked on by this thread considering the fact that I decided to share something with you guys. I dont share anything with anyone. If you were in my circle of friends and family, you would think we have a perfect relationship.

For the record- DH is an amazing dad. He was #1 point ALL vacation, allowing me to relax 110%. He gets up with Wy on his one day off. He changes more diapers than most dads. On our vacation we were gone 12 days. I changed... wait for it... one diaper the WHOLE time.

He is a good guy, we are just going through shit and I thought that sharing with you guys would be a safe, easy thing to do. Not every year can be a picture of perfection. Maybe for some of you it is, but unfortunately I was not blessed with the perfect husband. I was blessed with a work in progress who is in fact made for me.

I dont give up. I do get frustrated and needed a place to vent without judgement. But there truly isnt a place like that in real life nor the internets.

I wasn't thinking of you, there have been a few folks recently who say their husbands do NOTHING around the house, refuse to get up with the kid ever etc. Thats what I was thinking of. People who still take on 99% of the parenting and running a house even though we, as women, no longer have to or should.

[Deleted]

Smudgee, I don't think anybody is talking about you here! Your husband has always sounded like an amazing father. There can be problems in marriages even if both parties are amazing parents.

[TrudyCampbell]

@smudgee, I'm sorry that this thread is making you feel that way. This board is a safe place for you to share stuff. For the record, all the stuff I was saying actually didn't have you in mind at all. I was directing it towards the women who recently shared that they've never slept in at all since we gave birth, etc. 

And I don't think anyone is saying that these husbands are bad guys or bad fathers. 

Hugs, lady. I hope I didn't hurt your feelings. 

[katie]

Apr 26, 2013 9:34:12 GMT -5 @pcloadletter said:

It didn't occur to me that as your hair greys so do your pubes. They do though

I have a lot of grey on my head but so far none down below...I had not even thought of that. I wonder if there is some lag time or something? My H has "clear" as he calls them, in his beard but that's it so far.

[Deleted]

Apr 26, 2013 9:41:53 GMT -5 TrudyCampbell said:

@smudgee, I'm sorry that this thread is making you feel that way. This board is a safe place for you to share stuff. For the record, all the stuff I was saying actually didn't have you in mind at all. I was directing it towards the women who recently shared that they've never slept in at all since we gave birth, etc. 

And I don't think anyone is saying that these husbands are bad guys or bad fathers. 

Hugs, lady. I hope I didn't hurt your feelings. 

I really do think that I am overly sensitive. Between sharing and AF coming to town.... melllltttttttttdddddddoooooowwwwwnnnnnn.

[katfco]

Apr 26, 2013 9:35:26 GMT -5 @smudgee said:

Maybe I am overly sensitive right now or such but I feel so extremely picked on by this thread considering the fact that I decided to share something with you guys. I dont share anything with anyone. If you were in my circle of friends and family, you would think we have a perfect relationship.

For the record- DH is an amazing dad. He was #1 point ALL vacation, allowing me to relax 110%. He gets up with Wy on his one day off. He changes more diapers than most dads. On our vacation we were gone 12 days. I changed... wait for it... one diaper the WHOLE time.

He is a good guy, we are just going through shit and I thought that sharing with you guys would be a safe, easy thing to do. Not every year can be a picture of perfection. Maybe for some of you it is, but unfortunately I was not blessed with the perfect husband. I was blessed with a work in progress who is in fact made for me.

I dont give up. I do get frustrated and needed a place to vent without judgement. But there truly isnt a place like that in real life nor the internets.

Honestly, I think you get an "out" from the H talk because it really sounds like your husband's behavior is due to an injury. From what you described I'd bet anything it's not his fault he's this way. I think most of the comments on this post are in reference to men who know they're not stepping up and don't care. I really don't think your H is aware of how he's changed.

[thedahliharpa]

Apr 26, 2013 9:22:19 GMT -5 rainbowchip said:

Apr 26, 2013 9:16:25 GMT -5 kistjenn said:

I have more of a question/confession that's isn't flame worthy, but for the life of me I cannot figure out what GBCN or CH means.  I know, call me stupid, I just don't know.

Good Bye Cruel Nest

Chuckling

Heartily



Edit for spelling

EFS

[DesertMoon]

I think pubes grey last, since they came in last, making them younger...KWIM

[TrudyCampbell]

The stuff I said was not intended to make ANYONE feel bad about themselves or their husbands. I was hoping that reading about the experience of others would help empower you to ask more of your husbands.

[heyjojo]

Apr 26, 2013 9:46:59 GMT -5 DesertMoon said:

I think pubes grey last, since they came in last, making them younger...KWIM

My thoughts exactly

[katfco]

Here's mine: I feel like a failure sometimes that I still haven't found a job. I know there's one I have an interview for soon, but if I don't get it I'm not sure what I'm going to do. I just feel like I've spent the last several years and who knows how much money getting a degree that so far can't land me a job.

I also feel jealous sometimes when I read all these posts about people going shopping and buying things. I never just "go shopping." The only time I ever buy clothes is when I really need them. Earlier this week I was too wiped to make dinner so DH picked up Burger King and complained that I wanted the larger soda instead of the value size. I'm just so tired of having to watch every dollar.

[Deleted]

Apr 26, 2013 9:47:22 GMT -5 @pcloadletter said:

@smudgee I was referring to things said in the Mother's Day thread and what teamhayes said today. I'm sorry you feel judged. Share away!

See? Totally over reacting and emotional. I didnt read the mothers day thread... 

[creamsiclechica]

I understand encouraging women to communicate to their husbands, but I will say, I don't think it's as cut and dry or as simple as saying, "I need you to do this." I certainly think it's fair for husbands and wives to co-parent, but every relationship has a different dynamic, so I think we have to bear that in mind. Communication in a relationship is HARD. That's why it's the number one problem in marriages. That's why there's marriage counseling, because a lot of couple have trouble communicating their needs and desires to their spouse.
I definitely recommend opening the lines of communication between the two of you, but it's a work in progress, and their might not be immediate results. Sleeping in or getting a break is a simple request, but some people might be taking in a variety of factors in their husband before they make that demand. That's all I'm saying. I know there's a few people on here who don't have perfect marriages, and that's OKAY. I'm all for empowerment and fairness as a wife, but sometimes it's not as easy as some of us who do have really understanding or supportive husbands think it might be for someone else.
I agree with what Trudy said, though, the starting point is telling him how you feel.

But I also think that if someone posts an undesirable attribute about their husband and someone else agrees with it, we shouldn't be like "why are these husbands such dicks? Why are they assholes," which is what I've seen a lot of in other threads.

[kistjenn]

@smudgee I'm sorry you feel this way.  But you are 100% correct when you say that not every year can be a picture of perfection, because it can't.  All relationships have their ups and downs.  And people share only what they want to here, so perspectives/opinions can be one sided or altered.
DH & I have had a rollacoaster of a ride in the 11 years together, including a 4 month seperation.  But, I believe if it's ment to be, then it will, if not, then not.  I'm sure the both of you will figure it out, one way or another.  Nothing but love to you!

[rainbowchip]

Apr 26, 2013 9:43:59 GMT -5 thedahliharpa said:

Apr 26, 2013 9:22:19 GMT -5 rainbowchip said:

Good Bye Cruel Nest

Chuckling

Heartily



Edit for spelling

EFS

Well I just can't win with this today.  LOL.  FAIL!

[Regina Philange]

Hahahahah sleeping in exists?

My H works so much that sometimes during the week he only sees Lou in the morning. Sometimes I feel like I work then come home to my second shift because yeah H isn't here. On the weekends though he is great. Steps up to the plate.

I think teamhayes was probably just venting and I'm sure her H isn't like that all the time. This is the first I've heard an H rant from her.

Smudgers- don't feel singled out in this thread at all. You know we all want the best for you.

Communication is key though. Sometimes I need something and I snap asking the wrong way. That's not the way to open up communication. How will husbands know what we expect if we don't enlighten them. Same goes for them w us.

I am the first to admit I can be a total pain in the ass.

[oso]

Apr 26, 2013 9:26:48 GMT -5 @thadsrad said:

Apr 26, 2013 9:25:14 GMT -5 JuliaGulia said:

I don't believe that straight pubes exist!!!!

Want a picture???

This made me laugh!

[TrudyCampbell]

I agree with what Cream is saying. I don't have a perfect marriage, probably no one does. I don't think it's always as simple as just telling them what you want/need but it's at least a start. The reason I feel the need to chime in about this is because I care about you ladies and when I see people on here getting upset that their husbands don't do more I want it to change! I get that different things work for different relationships. But there have been posts where clearly the women is unhappy with a certain situation and the man seems to be getting the better end of the deal. I want ALL of the women here to feel appreciated for everything that they do. 

[claralou]

My FFFC: I couldn't sleep in past 7am even if someone paid me to do it. Even if was sick. I have waaaaaaaay too many years of starting work at 5am for my body clock to even allow this. I'm slightly jealous of the "sleeping in" talk.

[laurack]

yeah the reason my hubby rarely gets up with her is because on the weekends I get to "sleep in" until she wakes for the day which is 730-8am. After getting up at 6 all week for work this feels wonderful!

Before I had a baby I would laugh at 8am being lovely time to wakeup on a saturday, but now, it is!

[devonpow]

Apr 26, 2013 9:35:26 GMT -5 @smudgee said:

Maybe I am overly sensitive right now or such but I feel so extremely picked on by this thread considering the fact that I decided to share something with you guys. I dont share anything with anyone. If you were in my circle of friends and family, you would think we have a perfect relationship.

For the record- DH is an amazing dad. He was #1 point ALL vacation, allowing me to relax 110%. He gets up with Wy on his one day off. He changes more diapers than most dads. On our vacation we were gone 12 days. I changed... wait for it... one diaper the WHOLE time.

He is a good guy, we are just going through shit and I thought that sharing with you guys would be a safe, easy thing to do. Not every year can be a picture of perfection. Maybe for some of you it is, but unfortunately I was not blessed with the perfect husband. I was blessed with a work in progress who is in fact made for me.

I dont give up. I do get frustrated and needed a place to vent without judgement. But there truly isnt a place like that in real life nor the internets.

. I'm really sorry you feel singled out - I know my post was regarding the ladies in another thread (mothers day?) who said they wished they could sleep in on Mother's Day but doubted it would happen because they hasn't been allowed a sleep in day since the baby had arrived.

[ashleydl83]

All the birth stories and BFP make me want another baby. In a weird way, I enjoyed the labor process. I wanted to go med-free, but I chickened out each time.

[katfco]

Apr 26, 2013 10:24:33 GMT -5 ashleydl83 said:

All the birth stories and BFP make me want another baby. In a weird way, I enjoyed the labor process. I wanted to go med-free, but I chickened out each time.

This is me too. I loved being pregnant and there's a really big part of me that would love to be able to try again and maybe see if I could BF this time. But then I remember I'd have to take the baby home and you know, have room for it, and the desire decreases.

[Faevantastic]

You guys made me teared up. DH is depressed. He travels a lot for work during the week. He hates his job. He's pretty much miserable all the time. When I ask him to help, he groans and complains. He doesn't help with Evan's night wakings unless if he just happens to be up to go to the bathroom and so on. When he's not in a mood, eveything's great... like it used to be. I'm tearing up because you have idea how I'd LOVE to tell him off but I'm just so emotionally exhausted that I just can't stand another miserable moment in this house. I just can't. I know the problem isn't going to fix itself. We need counseling. It really sucks.

[eav2c]

Apr 26, 2013 10:43:43 GMT -5 Faevantastic said:

You guys made me teared up. DH is depressed. He travels a lot for work during the week. He hates his job. He's pretty much miserable all the time. When I ask him to help, he groans and complains. He doesn't help with Evan's night wakings unless if he just happens to be up to go to the bathroom and so on. When he's not in a mood, eveything's great... like it used to be. I'm tearing up because you have idea how I'd LOVE to tell him off but I'm just so emotionally exhausted that I just can't stand another miserable moment in this house. I just can't. I know the problem isn't going to fix itself. We need counseling. It really sucks.

((hugs)) I'm sorry. I understand. I really, really do.

I think some of the comments in this thread were insensitive, not on purpose though, but insensitive nonetheless. Give suggestions but calling someone's husband an asshole or dick certainly doesn't make someone whose struggling with marital problems to feel better. Its really kind of shitty and not supportive - at all.

ETA: I don't see the dick/asshole comment anymore. Either it was DD, I dreamt it, or it was in another thread. Either way, my sentiment still stands. It's not so clear cut for everyone to just communicate. It's not always that simple.

[The Foozzler]

I've got one. I was nominated by someone for Teacher of the Year. You can decline the nomination and I plan to. Partly because the process involves a ton of paper work and essays. Getting selected involves even more essays and a speech. I am way too unmotivated to have any part of that. Also, while I think I am a pretty good teacher, I am far from the best. Definitely not Teacher of the Year.

I don't plan to tell anyone about the nomination because H will try to convince me to do all of the paperwork for it.

[ashleydl83]

I ordered Otis Spunkmeyer cookies from the boys a couple of months ago and am picking it up today. I plan to eat a ridiculous amount of cookies this weekend. I will probably complain about my weight (to myself) more than once while I enjoy said cookies.