Dad died, left ins $ to me, GF wants it

[tripleshot]

This may be flameful, but oh well. So my dad died last week, but we didn't have a relationship. He decided drugs, alcohol, and partying were more important than being a father. He was seriously a loser and deadbeat person and citizen.  Here's my post last week pandce.proboards.com/thread/230242/father-died-zero-rerelationship

Well, his longtime GF called me today (never called me before). I let it go to voicemail. Apparently he had a life insurance policy (probably very tiny employer based) and named my brother and I as beneficiaries. She asked for us to send her the money when we get it. LOFL. She's just as much of a lowlife drug addict than he was. If he wanted her to have the money, he would've named her as beneficiary.

So my brother and I decided we're not calling her back, we don't owe her anything.mMy brother needs the money, he has been off work with a broken wrist and couldn't pay his mortgage this month. 

Thoughts on how to handle this if it blows up? I have no idea how much money, but it's probably not very much. He wouldn't have paid for a private term policy, so it must have been an employer one? I think he worked for a blacktop/asphalt place. 

[Deleted]

no contact with her whatsoever.

if it escalates, get an attorney

[lime]

I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. I don't have a relationship with my dad either, so I will choose to not go to his funeral.

I would do nothing. Block her number if you can or just ignore her calls.

She doesn't know where either of you live, right?

[purrbox]

Yeah, don't humor her. I wouldn't even keep in contact with her if she has the galls to request that you and your bro send her your dad's life insurance money. That's pretty messed up.

But I do think your dad obviously cared about you guys to leave you two as the beneficiaries of his life insurance policy, whatever the amount may be. However he was in life, flaws and all, I think it's worth giving him credit for this act of kindness.

[Deleted]

LOL. What an asshole. I would totally ignore her. If she's that much of a lowlife, she won't be able to scrape together the money to fight you for it (not that she would have a case anyway). Just ignore, ignore.

[leeann]

Ignore, involve a lawyer of your own if need be, otherwise ignore.

[Deleted]

Ignore, ignore, ignore. If she persists, get an attorney.

[Deleted]

Definitely no contact with her.

[Dezi]

Ignore her, don't make contact. Chances are she'll eventually give up.

[LLL]

Ignore her. Sorry you have to deal with this

[tripleshot]

Sept 28, 2013 19:43:26 GMT -5 lime said:

I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. I don't have a relationship with my dad either, so I will choose to not go to his funeral.

I would do nothing. Block her number if you can or just ignore her calls.

She doesn't know where either of you live, right?

I'm sure she could find our addresses if she wanted to, but she doesn't have the resources to travel 4 hours away. My brother and I didn't go to the funeral. We didn't want to upset my grandpa, so we told him my brother was having surgery on his wrist and i had to take him to the hospital, which was true, but it was the day before the service. 

[hisno1girl]

Just ignore her. Don't even bother hiring an attorney. You don't need one.

[bonquiqui]

I am sorry that you are going through this.  Just ignore her, and take appropriate action if she continues

[hisno1girl]

Sept 28, 2013 19:44:34 GMT -5 purrbox said:

Yeah, don't humor her. I wouldn't even keep in contact with her if she has the galls to request that you and your bro send her your dad's life insurance money. That's pretty messed up.

But I do think your dad obviously cared about you guys to leave you two as the beneficiaries of his life insurance policy, whatever the amount may be. However he was in life, flaws and all, I think it's worth giving him credit for this act of kindness.

No.

She doesn't have to do any of that.

[demelza]

Ignore. I am sure she will stop badgering you pretty quickly. She is probably too poor to get a lawyer and isn't legally owed a cent anyway.

[bab]

I am sorry you are dealing with this but I am LOL at the moron girlfriend. Holy shit! People never cease to amaze!

[dexteroni]

Sorry you're dealing with this. I agree, definitely don't contact her. If she persists or threatens or even hints at doing something negative, involve a lawyer and police if need be. Any necessary contact (like a restraining order) can come from them, not you.

I'm kind of lol'ing at the balls it takes to ask people you've never met for money that you're in no way entitled to.  But really, it's just addict behavior, and that's just fucking sad. I'm not saying she deserves any sympathy - sad as in pathetic, not as in "aw, poor her."

[5hole]

Wow. I am so sorry you are having to deal with all this drama.

You don't owe her anything, not even a phone call back.

For what it's worth, our company does very basic policies for all employees. They start at 25k, but I'm not sure how the payouts are calculated...

[dexteroni]

Sept 28, 2013 20:00:47 GMT -5 hisno1girl said:

Sept 28, 2013 19:44:34 GMT -5 purrbox said:

Yeah, don't humor her. I wouldn't even keep in contact with her if she has the galls to request that you and your bro send her your dad's life insurance money. That's pretty messed up.

But I do think your dad obviously cared about you guys to leave you two as the beneficiaries of his life insurance policy, whatever the amount may be. However he was in life, flaws and all, I think it's worth giving him credit for this act of kindness.

No.

She doesn't have to do any of that.

Agree. Only the OP gets to decide how she feels about him.

[mellymel]

I don't understand why pp's are recommending getting an attorney if gF escalates this. There is no need for an attorney if OP and her brother are the legal beneficiaries. GF is owed nothing and has no rights to a policy on which she is not a named beneficiary.

[janiejones]

She sounds like a tool.

Do you know where the policy is? They might not pay it out until you make contact and provide ID & a death certificate.

[revolution]

Ignore her. Theife ins money is yours and your brothers. It is separate from even anything he has as far as an estate to settle with. She can't get to it.

If she gets out if control, get an estate attorney. But it should be pretty clear cut

I am sorry for your loss.

[anlo]

Sept 28, 2013 19:44:34 GMT -5 purrbox said:

Yeah, don't humor her. I wouldn't even keep in contact with her if she has the galls to request that you and your bro send her your dad's life insurance money. That's pretty messed up.

But I do think your dad obviously cared about you guys to leave you two as the beneficiaries of his life insurance policy, whatever the amount may be. However he was in life, flaws and all, I think it's worth giving him credit for this act of kindness.

I have to respectfully disagree with this. One small token does not negate a lifetime of hurt.

OP, I'm sorry that this woman has the gall to contact you. Ignore her. She may threaten to do something, but you know she won't because she doesn't have a leg to stand on.

[revolution]

Op. You probably will need to provide a death certificate to the company holding his policy. If you don't have one, you don't need his gf. You can order them online for a nominal fee.

[tripleshot]

Sept 28, 2013 20:17:51 GMT -5 janiejones said:

She sounds like a tool.

Do you know where the policy is? They might not pay it out until you make contact and provide ID & a death certificate.

I don't have any information at all. We literally had zero relationship. I wouldn't even know where to start. But her voicemail made it seem like the check was on the way. Maybe she or my grandpa provided the death certificate and its being processed?

[janiejones]

Sept 28, 2013 20:24:54 GMT -5 tripleshot said:

Sept 28, 2013 20:17:51 GMT -5 janiejones said:

She sounds like a tool.

Do you know where the policy is? They might not pay it out until you make contact and provide ID & a death certificate.

I don't have any information at all. We literally had zero relationship. I wouldn't even know where to start. But her voicemail made it seem like the check was on the way. Maybe she or my grandpa provided the death certificate and its being processed?

Could be.  If you don't see anything maybe you or your brother could talk to your grandpa about the call GF made and see if he gives out any details.

[tripleshot]

Also, he died last Saturday. Would they process the life insurance that quickly?

[tripleshot]

Sept 28, 2013 20:36:49 GMT -5 @pnkbride said:

Who paid for the funeral? If she did, maybe give her the money to cover the funeral expenses out of the insurance money. That would be all that I would give her.

I'm positive she didn't pay. She probably doesn't have 2 nickels to rub together. I'm guessing one of his siblings paid.  My aunt had to pay for my grandmas funeral in December. 

[osulori]

Sept 28, 2013 20:36:24 GMT -5 tripleshot said:

Also, he died last Saturday. Would they process the life insurance that quickly?

In my experience, no.  When my MIL died suddenly earlier this year, it took at least a week for us to get the final death certificate.  Once the life insurance company got the paperwork they needed (which was a little more than the usual cut and dry since she hadn't updated her beneficiary info since naming her dad the beneficiary back in 1996 and he passed away in 2002), it took maybe two weeks for my H and his sisters to receive their checks.  So not a long time, but not lightning fast either.  I'm not sure if other life insurance companies are different though.

[Deleted]

well, that's chutzpah.