If it was a $9 bottle why on earth didn't you bring extra? Even if someone else was assigned wine, you had to have known people might want a glass of yours. If you need a full bottle for yourself why not spend an extra $20 and bring enough to share?
Haha, please note, I don't care if I was rude not to share. We spent more money on food than anyone else did, by far. We brought a huge spiral ham and a cheesecake, and happily shared with everyone. It's not my responsibility to provide white wine to everyone who wants it. One bottle of wine has ~5 glasses in it. So if I would have shared woth the 5 others that wanted it, there would have been none left for me.
I can't get behind you with the "the alcoholic did this" and "the alcoholic did that." Does "the alcoholic" have a name? I don't even care about your wine issue by the end of your post because your judginess totally skeeves me right the hell out.
I answered this already. She's a distant relative and literally fell down drunk 2 years ago, she's been in rehab 5-6 times in the last few years. I don't mean this as an offensive way to describe her, it was just the easiest adjective.
FIL is an alcoholic also. He's not nearly as bad as she is.
I would feel exactly like you did. You were not even responsible for bringing any wine so you were just covering your own desire for white wine. Someone should have done a white wine run...one of the people who did not bring any but insisted on some anyway. FWIW I always bring a bottle of Chardonnay because it is what I like and I would not be happy if I only got one glass of wine the whole evening.
Sorry, but you sound petty and ridiculous. Yes, someone probably should have brought more than 2 bottles of wine, but to refuse to share your bottle is pretty childish. It's not the end of the world if you only get one glass of the wine, at one dinner. You could have gone home and drank to your heart's content afterward if it was a big deal to you have more.
We were there from 2pm-8pm, and these aren't the kind of people I can hang around if I'm sober. They are awful people and I prefer to be able to drink if I'm forced to be around them. Racial jokes, holocaust jokes, sexist shit, etc. The wine helps me bite my tongue and not go off on them for being such awful assholes. Hence, why I don't care if they (or you guys) think I'm being rude by not sharing my wine. You guys don't know the whole story and I don't feel like airing all of their white trash dirty laundry.
If they are such awful people, why do you spend any time with them? Next year, celebrate Thanksgiving with friends instead. Problem solved.
Post by chickadee77 on Nov 29, 2013 13:46:38 GMT -5
Lol. My extended family, growing up, was like this. No one EVER EVER drinks - unless, of course, someone else (my family) was buying. So I can see where you were coming from, to a degree. That said, my folks were aware of this, and always kept (or brought) extra booze for reserve. As in, everyone would have some, then bitch that there wasn't any more, until the end of the night when there were 15 empty wine bottles and everyone claimed to have only had "one small glass." lol
So, yeah, you were rude, but so were they, and I agree with @vicmo in that you weren't the one that should have been thrown under the bus. Also, sounds like you have it figured out for the future. Cheers!
I didn't throw a tantrum at all. I didn't say anything when it was actually happening. I was standing there, someone pulled the white out of the fridge and gave it to DH to open. He said "oh this isn't cold enough yet, it needs to go back in the fridge, but I'll pour red for everyone!" Then I put the bottle in the fridge, and that's when MIL and the other relative had their conversation, and the other relative started screaming about her crackers. I rolled my eyes and walked outside, calmly
LOL. You're a grown adult. This, and you subsequently drinking the bottle by yourself, is the equivalent of a tantrum. Trust that everyone at that dinner, and probably everyone in this thread, thinks you threw a tantrum.Â
Post by thinkofthesoldiers on Nov 29, 2013 13:48:48 GMT -5
1) You need to be drunk to be around these people. I would think that an errand that takes another hour of that unbearable visit would have been welcomed.
2) You were being childish. If Thanksgiving started with two groups of people SHARING their shit, perhaps you should have taken a clue from that.
3) LOFUCKINGL that a $9 bottle of wine caused this drama. Bitch, get over yourself.
If it was a $9 bottle why on earth didn't you bring extra? Even if someone else was assigned wine, you had to have known people might want a glass of yours. If you need a full bottle for yourself why not spend an extra $20 and bring enough to share?
Because why on earth would I bring a bottle for DH and two bottles for me?! That's crazy. I brought what we wanted to drink, for ourselves. That's like saying I should have brought a case of beer or some vodka, because what if someone wanted those things?
The more I think about it the more ridiculous this seems. You were not the host of this party but you got crap for not providing enough wine for everyone? no.
I can't get behind you with the "the alcoholic did this" and "the alcoholic did that." Does "the alcoholic" have a name? I don't even care about your wine issue by the end of your post because your judginess totally skeeves me right the hell out.
I answered this already. She's a distant relative and literally fell down drunk 2 years ago, she's been in rehab 5-6 times in the last few years. I don't mean this as an offensive way to describe her, it was just the easiest adjective.
FIL is an alcoholic also. He's not nearly as bad as she is.
Excuse me, miss, your judginess is showing. You DO know there's a person in recovery (or two or ten) on this board, right? Your demeanor telling the story is really offensive. I get shivers thinking about what it would have been to have been a fly on the wall. Really. I'm sorry you're not seeing it.
The more I think about it the more ridiculous this seems. You were not the host of this party but you got crap for not providing enough wine for everyone? no.
You are an adult and you seriously think it's acceptable to attend a dinner party and bring something for only yourself while consuming it in front if everyone and refusing to share? You have blown my mind.
The whole thing sounds like a big clusterf*ck. i don't blame you for being annoyed.
That said, it was one evening... I don't think this is the hill you want to die on, especially if you have other issues with your ILs.
So what does your DH say about all of this?
DH is equally annoyed by these relatives, he was the one that first said "oh that's not cold enough yet" trying to be subtle about the fact that he wasn't going to pour my white. I asked him about it in the car on the way home and he said "you were fine"
The more I think about it the more ridiculous this seems. You were not the host of this party but you got crap for not providing enough wine for everyone? no.
You are an adult and you seriously think it's acceptable to attend a dinner party and bring something for only yourself while consuming it in front if everyone and refusing to share? You have blown my mind.
I think the host should have had a few bottles to start and if they ran out the host or hostess should run out for more. I don't think one guest should solely be responsible for bringing enough wine to take care of that large of a party.
I answered this already. She's a distant relative and literally fell down drunk 2 years ago, she's been in rehab 5-6 times in the last few years. I don't mean this as an offensive way to describe her, it was just the easiest adjective.
FIL is an alcoholic also. He's not nearly as bad as she is.
Excuse me, miss, your judginess is showing. You DO know there's a person in recovery (or two or ten) on this board, right? Your demeanor telling the story is really offensive. I get shivers thinking about what it would have been to have been a fly on the wall. Really. I'm sorry you're not seeing it.
Like I said, my apologies, I didn't mean this as an offensive way to describe her.
You are an adult and you seriously think it's acceptable to attend a dinner party and bring something for only yourself while consuming it in front if everyone and refusing to share? You have blown my mind.
I think the host should have had a few bottles to start and if they ran out the host or hostess should run out for more. I don't think one guest should solely be responsible for bringing enough wine to take care of that large of a party.
You are missing the point. It isn't about wine being provided, it is about jen's attitude regarding sharing her wine. On fucking Thanksgiving FFS. I'm sure her children are delightful assholes at the playground as well.
Haha, please note, I don't care if I was rude not to share. We spent more money on food than anyone else did, by far. We brought a huge spiral ham and a cheesecake, and happily shared with everyone. It's not my responsibility to provide white wine to everyone who wants it. One bottle of wine has ~5 glasses in it. So if I would have shared woth the 5 others that wanted it, there would have been none left for me.
I can't get behind you with the "the alcoholic did this" and "the alcoholic did that." Does "the alcoholic" have a name? I don't even care about your wine issue by the end of your post because your judginess totally skeeves me right the hell out.
I think the host should have had a few bottles to start and if they ran out the host or hostess should run out for more. I don't think one guest should solely be responsible for bringing enough wine to take care of that large of a party.
You are missing the point. It isn't about wine being provided, it is about jen's attitude regarding sharing her wine. On fucking Thanksgiving FFS. I'm sure her children are delightful assholes at the playground as well.
I think the host should have had a few bottles to start and if they ran out the host or hostess should run out for more. I don't think one guest should solely be responsible for bringing enough wine to take care of that large of a party.
You are missing the point. It isn't about wine being provided, it is about jen's attitude regarding sharing her wine. On fucking Thanksgiving FFS. I'm sure her children are delightful assholes at the playground as well.
No I am not. I just don't agree that she is in the wrong. I think the other guests and hostess were being rude.
You are missing the point. It isn't about wine being provided, it is about jen's attitude regarding sharing her wine. On fucking Thanksgiving FFS. I'm sure her children are delightful assholes at the playground as well.
My kids are great, thanks.
I don't really think we can trust your judgement on anyone's behavior.
So next year your H needs to man up and agree you aren't spending Thanksgiving with these people. It sounds like this kind of crap goes on every year, you don't enjoy the day so maybe it's time to go to alternating years, 1 year you go there and the next you don't.
The good thing that came of this discussion, thanks for the wine suggestion. It sounds like something I'd like and I'm planning on stopping by World Market this weekend anyway.
I do think someone should have thrown the wine bringer for not having brought more, like 2 reds/2 whites. I hate red, all reds. I only like a few whites. In truth I'd rather just have a big - HUGE - glass of Coke.
The more I think about it the more ridiculous this seems. You were not the host of this party but you got crap for not providing enough wine for everyone? no.
why did you like my post then, dummy? I think they are all ridiculous.
I am on my phone and must have accidentally hit the like button.
So next year your H needs to man up and agree you aren't spending Thanksgiving with these people. It sounds like this kind of crap goes on every year, you don't enjoy the day so maybe it's time to go to alternating years, 1 year you go there and the next you don't.
The good thing that came of this discussion, thanks for the wine suggestion. It sounds like something I'd like and I'm planning on stopping by World Market this weekend anyway.
I do think someone should have thrown the wine bringer for not having brought more, like 2 reds/2 whites. I hate red, all reds. I only like a few whites. In truth I'd rather just have a big - HUGE - glass of Coke.
We alternate, we go there every 3 years. I do like and get along with his immediate family that was there, it's just the random extra 6 people that I can't stand. They are awful. If I would have known they'd be there, I wouldn't have gone.
I can't get behind you with the "the alcoholic did this" and "the alcoholic did that." Does "the alcoholic" have a name? I don't even care about your wine issue by the end of your post because your judginess totally skeeves me right the hell out.
I answered this already. She's a distant relative and literally fell down drunk 2 years ago, she's been in rehab 5-6 times in the last few years. I don't mean this as an offensive way to describe her, it was just the easiest adjective.
FIL is an alcoholic also. He's not nearly as bad as she is.
And the easiest adjective to describe you is C*nty McC*nterson.