Who are all these people complaining that teachers "have summers off"? Is this really a thing?
Not complaining per se but since I am a trained teacher I get a lot of "must be nice to have 3 months off" comments. I quickly explain that it is not 3 months and while nice I had to explain why teachers do not get any additional vacation to take whenever they want like the rest of the world. People are often shocked by this. Insert eyeroll. I worked way harder and made less than a third of my salary as a teacher than in corporate America. So there naysayers.
Ok I am not being a bitch. Really. I just truly need to know. Why do you feel the need to even explain to people who say that? I just say "yeah, I love having so much time off". I know that I work my ASS off. I don't need to explain myself. Yes I also know that it really isn't 3 months, it's 2. And yes, less even if you choose to do summer school or a camp. But that's my choice to work in the summer to supplemet my income. I knew what education paid when I went into it. I am not arguing with you, I swear. I just truly don't understand the defending. Just own it. No?
Post by barefootcontessa on Feb 14, 2014 8:19:04 GMT -5
re: teacher talk ... I volunteer once a week in my sons' classes (elementary age) and honestly being a teacher of all those kids seems very tiring to me. And I say this as a mother of five fairly young children. at our school the children have such a wide range of abilities, it has to be difficult managing that and parental expectations at the same time. and while they have two months off (here we go until mid-June and start the last week of August) I am sure they need to do the prep work for their classroom during summer months. I know there is a steep learning curve to prep time (I was a college professor in my former life) but even if you are a veteran you still need to put in time before classes start. so I am not sure I would call being a teacher a cushy job, but none of the teachers I know really complain much about their job.
So as for those teacher martyrs, I am with ya. I am so sick of the "ohhh but we work soo hard, we deserve the summer off". Yes, many many do work really hard all year. Some of you do not let's face it. Lots of people work 12-14 hour days on a regular basis and do not get paid overtime (i used to be one). So give me a break. Just admit , it is AWESOME to have so much time off. Why all the defensiveness???
ETA "you" above refers to teachers in my school. just so no one flames me i just needed to GET THAT OUT
Lol totally my thoughts. I have a couple teachers in my il's and all I hear is how much they work at night and weekends. Yeah well you have the summer, spring break, winter break and a bunch of other days off so cry me a river. What can't they just own that it's a pretty cushy gig? Yeah well I work hard too and I work more days and my job actually is quite important too. And it's not charity, you are paid too. Ok rant over lol.
It doesn't help that my first year salary as a teacher (just 3 years ago) was $28,000 (which was less than 1 year's tuition at my undergrad). Maybe if they felt like they were getting compensated better they would complain less? We really just don't get paid what other people with equivalent educations get paid. And when you add in the fact that we work longer days to account for the time off in the summer it doesn't work to say "you get paid less because you get 2 months off per year!" If I wasn't married, I could never afford to teach.
I try not to complain but the job is hard. I cried a lot my first year. High schoolers are mean, critical, and expect the teachers to move mountains. The teacher is always wrong. I prepare a freaking dog and pony show to teach biology on a daily basis. I don't take days off during the year because I know we get so much vacation during the summer/spring break. But, truly, when I started teaching I realized how big of a secret other teachers were keeping from me: it is freaking hard and there is very little appreciation.
Post by undecidedowl on Feb 14, 2014 8:49:26 GMT -5
I will say, I find the whole teacher martyr thing to be annoying. There are pros and cons to every job. If you don't think the pros outweigh the cons, then do something else. But your job is not that out of balance with every other job out there.
But I will admit that I judge people who think termination should be illegal. And not in a "We have different opinions and I think you might be wrong" kind of way, but in the way that makes it impossible for me to look at them the same way again. And I honestly question their intelligence a little. I don't mean people who say, "Oh well, I don't believe in doing this". Believe what you want. But people who say, "Because I don't believe this, it should be illegal" get a huge side eye from me.Â
I have an easier time understanding a religious pro-lifer who is pro-life in all situations, but I think it is questionable as all hell to call yourself a Catholic or Christian, be "pro-life" when it comes to abortion and then be for capital punishment. Oh, and while I am at it, it would help if in your pro-life stance, you were pro-universal-health-care plans so that said pregnant women who shouldn't have the legal option to terminate, according to you, would continue to receive quality health care throughout her pregnancy. And I would also like it if you were pro-gay marriage so that the baby carried to term could be adopted by any loving family, not just a strict, antiquated definition of what constitutes a family. And if the woman without legal options chose to keep and raise her own baby, then I think it would be nice if you also refrained from judging welfare and other government assistance, should said woman and her baby need to rely on these.
I do not think anyone I know IRL who is "pro-life" believes all the other stuff I would ask them to believe to give them a free pass on this one.
The official Catholic pro-life standing opposes the death penalty as well, FYI. As with everything, individuals can make their own decisions, but the Catholic Church in general opposes the death penalty.
Post by shellbear09 on Feb 14, 2014 9:24:51 GMT -5
andthentherewere10 I could understand your complaining a bit more because you teach hs. That seems like a nightmare to me. I know people that teach 3rd grade. I totally believe that it is hard but there are trade offs. I just don't know why teachers are always singled out as the profession that is paid so much less than they are worth.
Not complaining per se but since I am a trained teacher I get a lot of "must be nice to have 3 months off" comments. I quickly explain that it is not 3 months and while nice I had to explain why teachers do not get any additional vacation to take whenever they want like the rest of the world. People are often shocked by this. Insert eyeroll. I worked way harder and made less than a third of my salary as a teacher than in corporate America. So there naysayers.
Ok I am not being a bitch. Really. I just truly need to know. Why do you feel the need to even explain to people who say that? I just say "yeah, I love having so much time off". I know that I work my ASS off. I don't need to explain myself. Yes I also know that it really isn't 3 months, it's 2. And yes, less even if you choose to do summer school or a camp. But that's my choice to work in the summer to supplemet my income. I knew what education paid when I went into it. I am not arguing with you, I swear. I just truly don't understand the defending. Just own it. No?
Well, I am not a teacher anymore. And I had some of these same misconceptions as a non teacher so I feel like since I've seen both sides of it maybe it's kind of my obligation to inform people. The educational system in America would be a lot better off if more people had exposure to what it's really like, not just the view from the outside. But that's just my opinion/crusade.
This is my whole issue. Teaching is a HARD, and VERY IMPORTANT job, which is only becoming harder and more important given all of the changes in standards being pushed through. However, it is also a job that has some really nice perks and benefits. Teachers shouldn't complain about their jobs as if they're the only people working hard, or the only people who are salaried and work overtime "for free" , and non-teachers should accept that it's a hard job that not everybody can do, and teachers deserve to be appreciated. That's all.
Like I said in my previous post, I live in NY, in an area where teachers are well compensated. I have friends ( who don't typically complain) who are married, both teachers with under 10 years, and combined make about 200K a year. I have other friends who are married, teach in NYC, make about 140K a year, and are total teacher martyrs. They act like they can't possibly live off that salary. Give me a break. I'm so tempted to ask them what they think I make, as an engineer. They're just out of touch with reality and it drives me crazy.
The official Catholic pro-life standing opposes the death penalty as well, FYI. As with everything, individuals can make their own decisions, but the Catholic Church in general opposes the death penalty.
Yes, I am aware of this as a lapsed Catholic. But many Catholics I know IRL are surprisingly in your face about the rights of a fetus and either don't give a crap about the death penalty or will say they are actually not opposed to it. I find this horrifyingly "anti-life."
ETA: In case it's not clear, I am anti-capital punishment and have done a fair amount of volunteer work on this issue. If I say this outside of my liberal NY circles, the conversation does not tend to go very well.
Post by gibbinator on Feb 14, 2014 12:12:24 GMT -5
Teachers have it way better in Canada (or at least NS) . In 2007 Dh made $42,000 as a first year teacher. Next year, with his raise from finishing his master's, he'll make almost double that. When he hits max salary he'll almost break 6 figures. Most of our friends are teachers and they all definitely enjoy their Christmas and summer vacations :-) I think his main complaint is dealing with bureaucratic schoolboard nonsense.
Here is a weird one....DH gets told he looks like Phillip Seymour Hoffman quite a bit. Last night someone even asked to take their picture with him (he said no..lol). My confession is that I did not find PSH attractive at all & thought H was way better looking. But there was a poster last night & i looked at them side by side...& damn it, it did look just like H. How can I find PSH so blah but H so hot? Lol.
Post by shellbear09 on Feb 14, 2014 14:22:58 GMT -5
@callmefia sorry that sounds sucky and I'm sure your H was just trying to do what is best for her. Honestly I would never make my dd do tummy time if she cried. It would maybe only last a minute or two. I held her alot and she would push off me so that is just as good. It is weird to me when the pedi pushes this, mine didn't mention it. He did encourage us to feed her on different sides though.
Post by mellimel19 on Feb 14, 2014 14:36:40 GMT -5
I just received a lovely plant from DH for Valentine's Day and instead of being appreciative like I normally would be, my first thought was, seriously, no chocolate? I'm 38 weeks pregnant and you sent me a plant instead of chocolate?!?!
@merida how old is she and why is he doing it? Like for tummy time versus enjoying pissing her off? How long will he leave her like that if you didn't intervene?
Eta: @callmefia
She is 2mo and when I took her to the pedi, he said most of her awake time should be on her tummy. H is apparently flipping about it and keeps doing it ALOT. I'm in the camp of doing it when she is in a better mood. Like this morning I put her on her side and she rolled on her tummy and I roll her over before she gets so upset that I will have to pick her up to console her.
I don't think the doc expects us to put her on her tummy 5 times in an hour when she screams her head off. It was close to her bedtime and she just wanted snuggles. He would leave her for a few minutes, then try to calm her down, then do it again without much time in between. I also have a generally very happy baby, and I try to catch her before she gets that upset. I felt like he was aggravating her too much.
I really didn't intervene because I didn't know what to say, especially without making him feel awful or making myself sound super bitchy. After I got her to bed I just said "I'm not ok with putting her on her tummy with so much screaming, that really upset me" and he just said ok.
Holding them counts as tummy time too so they're exercising their neck muscles and not just lying down. You can put her in an Ergo and go about your business and that is good exercise without pissing her off.
@merida how old is she and why is he doing it? Like for tummy time versus enjoying pissing her off? How long will he leave her like that if you didn't intervene?
Eta: @callmefia
She is 2mo and when I took her to the pedi, he said most of her awake time should be on her tummy. H is apparently flipping about it and keeps doing it ALOT. I'm in the camp of doing it when she is in a better mood. Like this morning I put her on her side and she rolled on her tummy and I roll her over before she gets so upset that I will have to pick her up to console her.
I don't think the doc expects us to put her on her tummy 5 times in an hour when she screams her head off. It was close to her bedtime and she just wanted snuggles. He would leave her for a few minutes, then try to calm her down, then do it again without much time in between. I also have a generally very happy baby, and I try to catch her before she gets that upset. I felt like he was aggravating her too much.
I really didn't intervene because I didn't know what to say, especially without making him feel awful or making myself sound super bitchy. After I got her to bed I just said "I'm not ok with putting her on her tummy with so much screaming, that really upset me" and he just said ok.
Try having your DH lay on the floor and have her do tummy time on his chest. She can still get cuddles and lots of attention and not be on her back, and my kids were less likely to cry when laying on someone as opposed to on the floor. Also, babywearing is a great way to get her to strengthen neck muscles and get off the back of her head for a while. Honestly it sounds like you handled it well.
I know I should be all "cook baby cook!" but now that I've hit 37 weeks, I'm kind of ready for this baby to get here already. I'd be completely fine if I went into labor tonight.
Plus ever since I found out my due date I worried about having DS right around when my niece was born on the 24th. I just know it's going to happen because I turn 38 weeks on the 21st and doc said last week that he wouldn't let me go past 38. And I don't care about the date because "ZOMG DS needs his special day!" It's because I don't want to stress every year wondering when B/SIL are having niece's birthday party and figuring out who gets what weekend since they live in a different city and there will be travel required for my mom to attend niece's party. It would be easier if they were at least a week apart so there was a "natural" best weekend for each and not overlap.
But it's completely out of my hands, so I just wait...
I'm in the exact same position. My due date is 24th and nephew's birthday is 26th. I really hope I have the baby this coming week so that I can claim this weekend and nephew can have next weekend.
I know I should be all "cook baby cook!" but now that I've hit 37 weeks, I'm kind of ready for this baby to get here already. I'd be completely fine if I went into labor tonight.
Plus ever since I found out my due date I worried about having DS right around when my niece was born on the 24th. I just know it's going to happen because I turn 38 weeks on the 21st and doc said last week that he wouldn't let me go past 38. And I don't care about the date because "ZOMG DS needs his special day!" It's because I don't want to stress every year wondering when B/SIL are having niece's birthday party and figuring out who gets what weekend since they live in a different city and there will be travel required for my mom to attend niece's party. It would be easier if they were at least a week apart so there was a "natural" best weekend for each and not overlap.
But it's completely out of my hands, so I just wait...
I'm in the exact same position. My due date is 24th and nephew's birthday is 26th. I really hope I have the baby this coming week so that I can claim this weekend and nephew can have next weekend.
My twin nephews' birthday is 3 days before DD's. The last two years, my parents went to visit us in France for DD's birthday and completely missed theirs. To compensate, this year, my parents are going on a vacation with my nephews. We all make our concessions and manage the situation. Don't stress too much about it.
I'm in the exact same position. My due date is 24th and nephew's birthday is 26th. I really hope I have the baby this coming week so that I can claim this weekend and nephew can have next weekend.
My twin nephews' birthday is 3 days before DD's. The last two years, my parents went to visit us in France for DD's birthday and completely missed theirs. To compensate, this year, my parents are going on a vacation with my nephews. We all make our concessions and manage the situation. Don't stress too much about it.
Post by gibbinator on Feb 14, 2014 16:37:28 GMT -5
@merida, my dh is a bit like this too. As soon as someone with a medical degree says "you must do x" he follows the instructions to the letter and with fear he's screwing up ds if he doesn't. I can't remember specific examples, but I remember thinking the same thing like "why are you doing this now when he's in a bad mood?"
I am so over the alarmist attitude surrounding the weather by our local news. They've been freaking out about it all day today, saying it was basically going to be horrible by like 2pm and it's not even sticking here yet. Like, the road is barely wet.
Winter weather is an anxiety trigger for me (seriously I think I have PPD after a couple of scary winters in Colorado) and I haaaate and resent the way potential weather is maximized for stupid ratings. Gah.
And it makes me not leave my house and that makes me cranky lol.
My 2nd confession is that I was pretty much unaware of the whole liking system or at least what a big deal it is. My 3rd confession is that now that I know I probably still won't participate because I read MM Mom's mostly when I'm stuck in never ending LA traffic (possible 4th confession) so I'm not exactly able to respond.
I like pretty much everything @tokenhoser says, because she is usually spot-on, even when she's a bit brusque about it.
Besides that, I don't notice too much if I'm distributing a disproportionate amount of likes. Oh, wait, maybe Willis Jackson gets a lot of my likes cause her kids are entertaining as all heck. Otherwise, if I "like" what you have to say, it's because I really liked it, not because I am trying to ingratiate myself with you or something.
Back to confessions- my best Valentine's Day gift was the box of momos a Tibetan mom brought to the bus stop today for the other moms just because. The box of 8 was meant for DD, but I inhaled 6 of them as soon as we got home. DD was busy eating V-day candy.
Post by gibbinator on Feb 14, 2014 18:32:59 GMT -5
The only "like"ing I give much thought to are the HDBD threads because I don't want anyone to feel like their kid isn't cute. I think regulars tend to get more likes in those threads so I tend to focus on liking less frequent posters. But then again, I also like all the pictures I think are cute. So in the end, I mostly like whatever I can see. Although the app annoys me because for some reason only about half the pics load.
Ha ha on the like threads. I love these boards but don't put enough time into participating in order to know more moms. Need to work on being more active
I like/appreciate them so much and know I don't put in enough time to know people or be known, but my plan is to be less active. I'm afraid I waste time at night when I should be reading or cleaning or [insert any productive activity here], and coming only for advice makes me feel a little guilty. I really can't post from work, so I feel like I'll never be a real "regular."
Everyone is entitled to some days/feelings/stages like yours. I just hope it turns around soon. Meanwhile, hugs to you.
Thanks! Feeling better today already, we had three snow days and I really don't like to be cooped up and then I feel guilty not loving the time with the family. And yes, I knw it'd be fun to be more regular but it would take more work and time here on the boards. Have a great Valentines and weekend.