Dude, why are you so defensive? If you're secure with yourself and your choices then you shouldn't get offended by stranger's opinions.
LOL OK. Yup. I'm just defensive and there is absolutely no merit in anything I've pointed out in this thread.
Come on. You must realize that you're being defensive. You're just taking this very personally. It's kind of a proven fact that people's brains don't stop developing until they're 25. And everyone of us in this thread who is over 25 was obviously under 25 at some point so it's not like we don't know what it's like to be under 25.
Again, I just don't see making a permanent decision like getting you're tubes tied at 23 if you don't HAVE to. And I might mention that the divorce rate is pretty darn high for young marriages as well.
Op, one thing to consider is that there is no guarantee that a spontaneous reversal will not happen. Both my mother and one of her friends had a tubal and 10-12 years later BAM - pregnant. I do not know the exact statistic as to how often this happens, but I know that it is not as uncommon as one might believe. If you are 23 now, 33-36 is still very much in the reproductive window. I would strongly suggest your FI having a vasectomy as well if this is something that you would like to do.
This pisses me right the fuck off. Not at you, but the fact that this is probably true. My body, my decision. Fucking hell. When will doc's (and everyone else, for that matter) accept the fact that not every woman on earth WANTS to procreate. I was in the grocery store yesterday and there was this horribly rude kid whose mother was clueless. Yeah, I want no part in raising a child. /rant
Yeah, especially because you have to sign consent forms. What? Do they think you'll be able to come back and sue them in 10 years for doing the procedure?
Yes, this is precisely what they think. (Well, not 10 years later, though -- it's unlikely the statute of limitations would extend that long.)
It is absolutely not an issue of a doctor imposing his or her will on a patient, as zoomzoom and RoxMonster characterize it.
Consent forms or not, people lose their damn minds and sue about anything and everything.
Doctors are smart not to take the unnecessary risk on patients that age when there are other ways of preventing pregnancy.
LOL OK. Yup. I'm just defensive and there is absolutely no merit in anything I've pointed out in this thread.
it's hard to recognize the merit when you are forcefully thwarting your opinion every 2 posts throughout the thread.
Well, I'm not going to apologize for what I've said in this thread. I have come here before for support when I am getting this shit from my mom pressuring me into having kids and "You don't know what you want," and everyone here has been 100% supportive of me. "How dare she say that, it is your life, make your own decisions, etc. I guess that isn't truly the case, since many were quick to turn around and say "You don't know your lyfe when you are young" (said exactly that way). It is pretty offensive and condescending, and it bothers me. It honestly surprised me that so many people on here were harboring that opinion, and I acknowledged from my first post this is my hot button issue. It just is.
Op, one thing to consider is that there is no guarantee that a spontaneous reversal will not happen. Both my mother and one of her friends had a tubal and 10-12 years later BAM - pregnant. I do not know the exact statistic as to how often this happens, but I know that it is not as uncommon as one might believe. If you are 26 now, 36-40 is still very much in the reproductive window. I would strongly suggest your FI having a vasectomy as well if this is something that you would like to do.
This is when they just used to phyisically TIE the tubes.
Mine where burned and cauterized (in several places), and tied. My doc said he's never had a failure. ::keeps fingers crossed::
Yeah, especially because you have to sign consent forms. What? Do they think you'll be able to come back and sue them in 10 years for doing the procedure?
Yes, this is precisely what they think. (Well, not 10 years later, though -- it's unlikely the statute of limitations would extend that long.)
It is absolutely not an issue of a doctor imposing his or her will on a patient, as zoomzoom characterizes it.
Consent forms or not, people lose their damn minds and sue about anything and everything.
Doctors are smart not to take the unnecessary risk when there are other ways of preventing pregnancy.
Get out of here with your facts!
Only emotions and opinions are recognized in this post!
LOL OK. Yup. I'm just defensive and there is absolutely no merit in anything I've pointed out in this thread.
Come on. You must realize that you're being defensive. You're just taking this very personally. It's kind of a proven fact that people's brains don't stop developing until they're 25. And everyone of us in this thread who is over 25 was obviously under 25 at some point so it's not like we don't know what it's like to be under 25.
Again, I just don't see making a permanent decision like getting you're tubes tied at 23 if you don't HAVE to. And I might mention that the divorce rate is pretty darn high for young marriages as well.
Well, I think when someone looks at a decision you have made, that have taken a LONG time to finally decide on, have educated yourself on it, etc., and then someone says "You don't know your lyfe when you are that young," most people would be defensive. You dropped some pretty offensive statements and then didn't expect any push back from them? OK.
I am peacing out of this thread now. Continue on with your judgments.
Op, one thing to consider is that there is no guarantee that a spontaneous reversal will not happen. Both my mother and one of her friends had a tubal and 10-12 years later BAM - pregnant. I do not know the exact statistic as to how often this happens, but I know that it is not as uncommon as one might believe. If you are 26 now, 36-40 is still very much in the reproductive window. I would strongly suggest your FI having a vasectomy as well if this is something that you would like to do.
This is when they just used to phyisically TIE the tubes.
Mine where burned and cauterized (in several places), and tied. My doc said he's never had a failure. ::keeps fingers crossed::
Actually they were cauterized, not just TIED. Again, it is a consideration and if she is adamant against having children then it needs to be discussed and part of the conversation that she has with her physician.
it's hard to recognize the merit when you are forcefully thwarting your opinion every 2 posts throughout the thread.
Well, I'm not going to apologize for what I've said in this thread. I have come here before for support when I am getting this shit from my mom pressuring me into having kids and "You don't know what you want," and everyone here has been 100% supportive of me. "How dare she say that, it is your life, make your own decisions, etc. I guess that isn't truly the case, since many were quick to turn around and say "You don't know your lyfe when you are young" (said exactly that way). It is pretty offensive and condescending, and it bothers me. It honestly surprised me that so many people on here were harboring that opinion, and I acknowledged from my first post this is my hot button issue. It just is.
This is when they just used to phyisically TIE the tubes.
Mine where burned and cauterized (in several places), and tied. My doc said he's never had a failure. ::keeps fingers crossed::
Actually they were cauterized, not just TIED. Again, it is a consideration and if she is adamant against having children then it needs to be discussed and part of the conversation that she has with her physician.
Interesting. My doctor explained to me that the failures of the past were due to what I stated. Clearly I was mistaken.
And of course, with any procedure failures happen, so yes, it's approrpiate to discuss that with one's doctor.
I had a tubal. The recovery was okay. I had minimal incision pain, but I had horrific shoulder pain from the gas used in my abdomen. That lasted about a week and it felt like my arms were being ripped off of my body. It was so overwhelming it would take my breath away. Other than that everything was peachy
There's also the risk of post TL syndrome. I am a hormonal mess (PCOS, autoimmune issues) and just the risk of TL syndrome scares the crap out of me. Not gonna touch the age issue. Other than I have wanted kids all along, waited for an "appropriate" age (26), needed fertility treatments and have had 6 losses. You just never know what life is going to throw at you.
I know Ombigest had the worst experience ever. I will say I had Essure about a year ago. I've been nothing but pleased. I was 36 when I had it done (no kids). I didn't have to even ask twice but my GYN knows I've been adamant about no kids forever. The insertion was not a breeze (AT ALL) but after it was over, I've had not a single issue.
Nope! I didn't have to have a coil puncture my spine or colon.
See, my insertion was a breeze, because it was SDS and I was completely out.
"You. You and your crazy life. You and your geographic anomaly. You and your drunken lesbianic ways and terrible navigational skills." - ProfArt and her holy baby
"You. You and your crazy life. You and your geographic anomaly. You and your drunken lesbianic ways and terrible navigational skills." - ProfArt and her holy baby
Mine was done while I had a C-section, so obviously everything was different. But I have the same side effects another poster stated about horrible heavy periods now. My dr. swears it's not the tubal, but I've found too many corroborating stories to believe him. I'm asking for an ablation soon.
It was a TIC comment in response to the absolutely absurd statement that no one can be trusted to make good choices before age 25.
That's not what was said.
LOL It was not in response to the brain studies, etc. It was in response to Joenali telling us she personally doesn't think anyone should decide to have or not have kids or make any important decisions until they are at least 25.
Well, I'm not going to apologize for what I've said in this thread. I have come here before for support when I am getting this shit from my mom pressuring me into having kids and "You don't know what you want," and everyone here has been 100% supportive of me. "How dare she say that, it is your life, make your own decisions, etc. I guess that isn't truly the case, since many were quick to turn around and say "You don't know your lyfe when you are young" (said exactly that way). It is pretty offensive and condescending, and it bothers me. It honestly surprised me that so many people on here were harboring that opinion, and I acknowledged from my first post this is my hot button issue. It just is.
ok, so you're projecting. got it.
i don't think people are slamming the OP for what you are clearly upset about ^^^. just letting her know that there are a myriad of other options that make more sense for her age/life stage. at the risk of being yelled at, it is just SMARTER to do something like an IUD (for example), until she is older.
no one in this post can claim that all opinions stay the same throughout one's lifetime. some will, yes, but certainly not all. why not be smart about it? why not mitigate any potential future difficulty?? especially since tube-tying and <insert other option> fulfill the same objective?
I am totally OK with people explaining other options. I started reading this thread because I was interested in hearing personal stories and opinions of tubals, et al because it's probably in my future. I have absolutely zero problem with people saying (LIKE YOU DID) "Here's my experience with a tubal, but there might be other options. Talk to your doc." OR "Just so you know, here are some less permanent options IF you decide against a tubal." I DO have a problem with people passing judgment, which some posters--not you--did do. I mean, people were in here saying "No one who is 23 should be even having kids." Do you not have a problem with that? If not, I do. And I don't feel bad about voicing that.
i don't think people are slamming the OP for what you are clearly upset about ^^^. just letting her know that there are a myriad of other options that make more sense for her age/life stage. at the risk of being yelled at, it is just SMARTER to do something like an IUD (for example), until she is older.
no one in this post can claim that all opinions stay the same throughout one's lifetime. some will, yes, but certainly not all. why not be smart about it? why not mitigate any potential future difficulty?? especially since tube-tying and <insert other option> fulfill the same objective?
I am totally OK with people explaining other options. I started reading this thread because I was interested in hearing personal stories and opinions of tubals, et al because it's probably in my future. I have absolutely zero problem with people saying (LIKE YOU DID) "Here's my experience with a tubal, but there might be other options. Talk to your doc." OR "Just so you know, here are some less permanent options IF you decide against a tubal." I DO have a problem with people passing judgment, which some posters--not you--did do. I mean, people were in here saying "No one who is 23 should be even having kids." Do you not have a problem with that? If not, I do. And I don't feel bad about voicing that.
Or any other major life decisions at the magic age of 25 :/
"You. You and your crazy life. You and your geographic anomaly. You and your drunken lesbianic ways and terrible navigational skills." - ProfArt and her holy baby
I think the biggest driving force is that having kids is just not medically feasible for me at this point. Maybe if someone waves a magic wand and makes it A-Ok, I'd be less dead set on getting my tubes tied.
I am totally OK with people explaining other options. I started reading this thread because I was interested in hearing personal stories and opinions of tubals, et al because it's probably in my future. I have absolutely zero problem with people saying (LIKE YOU DID) "Here's my experience with a tubal, but there might be other options. Talk to your doc." OR "Just so you know, here are some less permanent options IF you decide against a tubal." I DO have a problem with people passing judgment, which some posters--not you--did do. I mean, people were in here saying "No one who is 23 should be even having kids." Do you not have a problem with that? If not, I do. And I don't feel bad about voicing that.
no, but mainly b/c thie board is a collection of idiots (on a good day). it doesn't bother me.
I guess I just like calling people out on their idiocy lol. It was just a very offensive and narrow-minded comment IMO. And if someone on here who is 23 says they are pregnant or are wanting to get pregnant and someone told them, "You're too young. You might change your mind. Hold off on that," I feel like others would join me with our pitchforks.
(LOL this is what you get when you Google image "flaming pitchfork")
Mine was done while I had a C-section, so obviously everything was different. But I have the same side effects another poster stated about horrible heavy periods now.
+1 to the crazy heavy periods with bonus cramps from hell. Another thing I found is that my clockwork like 29 day cycles have bouts of wild irregularity. I can't comment on any hormonal changes because I have always had plenty of crazy going on.
As for the procedure/doctor part, mine were tied when I had my c-section. I was in my early 30s, had multiple miscarriages and 2 high-risk pregnancies. When I told my obgyn that I wanted a tubal if I had a c/s, he was very hesitant because I was young and what if I wanted more kids, etc. He is an amazing doctor and considering how much fucking time I spent with him and his staff throughout aforementioned miscarriages and pregnancies, I am going to assume that he just enjoyed my weekly (sometimes multiple times per week) company and the steady income my insurance company and co-pays were providing because the thought of going through any of that again is crazy.
ETA: I hope your doctor will be open to the procedure. Given the medical issues you have, it would be really shitty to give you a hard time about it.
I think the biggest driving force is that having kids is just not medically feasible for me at this point. Maybe if someone waves a magic wand and makes it A-Ok, I'd be less dead set on getting my tubes tied.
I feel like people are missing this point.
But I'm just going to mosey on out since I really have nothing to contribute other than that, and just to explore all your options under the guidance of your doc.
Post by underwaterrhymes on Jul 28, 2014 13:07:32 GMT -5
I personally would choose a less permanent option at the age of 23.
This is not because people can't make grown-up decisions at 23 or because you can't possibly know you don't want kids or because you shouldn't have control over your own body.
It is because a LOT changes between your early twenties and the rest of your life.
Feelings change. Situations change. This is, of course, true at any age, but the fact of the matter is you are a very different person in a very different place at 20 than you are at 40.
Plus, it's reason enough to look at something less permanent given your indication that if someone waved a magic wand and made it medically feasible for you to have kids you might consider it. Medical advancements happen all the time. If this is the primary thing holding you back, it might be worth looking at other options for the time being just in case something changes.
On the flip side of the coin, I would also not personally choose to have a child at 23, but I do know a number of people who had children young who have been thrilled with their decision.
And there are many on this board who would not choose to have a baby after 40, which I hope to do, so there is that too.
I think the biggest driving force is that having kids is just not medically feasible for me at this point. Maybe if someone waves a magic wand and makes it A-Ok, I'd be less dead set on getting my tubes tied.
Considering the medical issues, there are doctors out there that will be willing to work with you... it just might take awhile and some digging. This thread is weird. I have heard that younger women tend to have better luck with this if they have been on a long term form of birth control (IUD, nexplanon, etc) prior to the request.