I know, I keep telling myself that I have a great job and a great family and I am on the road to good things. But I feel so stuck and I look at my marriage and wonder how the hell it got here and I feel like I have put all of myself into it and I just don't have much else to give. And it is dumb to feel those feelings in it isn't THAT bad but I am so scared of failing.
Is Study the one who claimed she gives, on average, 2.5 BJs a day? If so, I stopped believing she was a real person the moment she posted that.
Huh- I didn't connect this with studytime, sort of an 'Aha' moment... In any case, when this nonsense was initially posted, I really wanted to request a BJ check-in for a week, so we could verify. Just pop in to ML, create a new post stating "BJ#1", "Beej2!!" etc. I realize this sounds crazy, & she totally could've faked, but also thinking maybe this accountability would've explained our utter DISBELIEF! ?
I know, I keep telling myself that I have a great job and a great family and I am on the road to good things. But I feel so stuck and I look at my marriage and wonder how the hell it got here and I feel like I have put all of myself into it and I just don't have much else to give. And it is dumb to feel those feelings in it isn't THAT bad but I am so scared of failing.
It isn't dumb at all to feel that way when your marriage is strained. Try not to let it take you down, though. As you said, you're putting your all into it, and that's all you can do. Give yourself a break, and be kind to yourself.
I might have rebound sex with this awesome guy I know. I'm judging myself for it. And then I'm not. And then more judging.
In another post you said you hated your love life. This is an opportunity for you to do something about it. You are a smart lady. This is a really fucking dumb idea. Just say no. You are hurting and think the sex will make things feel better/distract you/prove your worthiness. It won't. It will just start the cycle all over again. Please do not devalue yourself.
It has been said that the definition of insanity is to repeat the same behavior over and over expecting different results.
Don't try to fill the hole in your heart with physical relief. Evaluate yourself.
"Why would you ruin perfectly good peanuts by adding candy corn? That's like saying hey, I have these awesome nachos, guess I better add some dryer lint." - Nonny
"You. You and your crazy life. You and your geographic anomaly. You and your drunken lesbianic ways and terrible navigational skills." - ProfArt and her holy baby
Post by chickadee77 on Mar 1, 2015 13:12:42 GMT -5
(((elle))) I hear what you're saying, but this is one way in which babies and dogs are not alike. You would be adopting a child that needs a family, not supporting a potentially abusive puppy mill. As another poster said, having a biological child takes all of the choices out of your hands - you get what you get. With adoption, there is nothing wrong with wanting to minimize any potential issues that could arise later. If having a child that looks like you and your H is important to you, it's important to you, and trying to squelch that will likely not have great repercussions to you, your marriage, or your child.
And TrickyBob, huge (((hugs))) to you, too. You matter, and I understand the feeling of wanting everything to go away. I know I'm kind of a lurker on this board, but your strength has served you well, and will continue to do so. I hope things look up for you soon.
TrickyBob - I will come meet you anytime anywhere. *hugs* And if we sell this place we'll have a new house with a SPARE BEDROOM. :-) I'm an hour south, Ohhmm(bligo) is an hour north. YOU CAN'T ESCAPE THE NESTIE LOVE.
My confession is I've been quite bored with my life in general. I SO need a change or changes. I love my job and it's pretty rewarding and the pay and benefits are terrific, but I'm growing weary of the responsibilities I have. I'm also weary of living in the house I've owned for 9 years.
I think a lot of this is due to the fact that I know I'm retiring in a couple years and will be making many changes in my life. I think my subconscious is impatient for it to all happen RIGHT THIS INSTANT, but I know bills have to be paid off and I need to wait a bit longer so I can have a larger monthly pension check that will see me through the rest of my life.
I'm taking steps to get my house on the market in May so that has helped. It'll be fun to move in a new place. Plus I'm taking a trip out of state to attend a conference on Thursday, so I'm looking forward to getting out of Dodge.
What troubles me is my life is pretty great and I should be content with what I have, but there's that part of my personality that craves change every few years. Anyone else here like that?
"Why would you ruin perfectly good peanuts by adding candy corn? That's like saying hey, I have these awesome nachos, guess I better add some dryer lint." - Nonny
My confession is I've been quite bored with my life in general. I SO need a change or changes. I love my job and it's pretty rewarding and the pay and benefits are terrific, but I'm growing weary of the responsibilities I have. I'm also weary of living in the house I've owned for 9 years.
I think a lot of this is due to the fact that I know I'm retiring in a couple years and will be making many changes in my life. I think my subconscious is impatient for it to all happen RIGHT THIS INSTANT, but I know bills have to be paid off and I need to wait a bit longer so I can have a larger monthly pension check that will see me through the rest of my life.
I'm taking steps to get my house on the market in May so that has helped. It'll be fun to move in a new place. Plus I'm taking a trip out of state to attend a conference on Thursday, so I'm looking forward to getting out of Dodge.
What troubles me is my life is pretty great and I should be content with what I have, but there's that part of my personality that craves change every few years. Anyone else here like that?
LOL. This is fascinating to read paired with what I posted in the Randoms thread. We are in opposite places right now. I've had so much change over the past 15 years, I'm ready to settle down a bit.
What troubles me is my life is pretty great and I should be content with what I have, but there's that part of my personality that craves change every few years. Anyone else here like that?
Yes. This was a big reason why I took my current job. I can work from home full time, from anywhere in the US, about a year from now. That way, if I get too restless to stand it we can just pick up and move with minimal consequences.
I felt like this for a couple of years when I first got married. I now know that it's a sign of depression and I hope you can get help addressing these thoughts. They are obviously and completely untrue. You are an amazing person who is loved by so many people. Try your best to believe it. ((hugs))
elle, You know your marriage best. If you need to take the first steps for adoption, go ahead. You will know soon enough if your H is just hesitant because of the process or he is a hard no.
Adoption is a complicated process emotionally. Anything you feel is normal. You are most certainly not ordering a baby. ((hugs)) and good luck to you!!
Lacey, I'm side eyeing your "I'm glad I gave you a legit confession to enjoy" bit.