I'm so sorry Tricky. It wasn't easy, but I have zero regrets about leaving my ex-husband, or should I say, kicking him out. It has been 17 years since that day and, after a rough first year, I truly believe the years that have followed to be the best of my life.
I met XH when I was 19, married and a mom by 20. I stayed much longer than I should have for a number of reasons (kids, his disability, my fears, you name it). We had four kids and I was 28 when I finally ended it for good.
I have since met a wonderful guy who has loved and supported me for 20+ years, including helping to raise my kids and now adopting and raising two of my grandchildren. XH has found somebody who has loved and supported him for 20 years, through seizure disorders, cancer and other medical issues. They also have a teenage son with autism.
XH and I split custody so we've both ended up with partners who suit us and support us so much more than we ever did each other. Neither of us thought that would happen with all the baggage we each carried. There is somebody out there for you too. I hope you find him when you are ready. In the meantime, be good to yourself and know that it's better on the other side, the side where you are single and love and support yourself, rather than having somebody treat you with disrespect and you can't trust.