Post by starryfish on Sept 24, 2015 12:29:29 GMT -5
My DH is out of town with some guy friends. 3 of them are splitting a hotel that is $220 a night. So you have my DH, Friend A, and Friend B. Friend A had to cancel last minute because he doesn't have a valid ID right now (due to unpaid parking tickets that lead to him losing his license I guess? I am not certain on the details). (He needs the ID since they are flying to destination). He already paid my DH his share, $220.
Friend B is still going but he only paid $180 so far. Since Friend A is not coming anymore (due to his own fault), he wants his $220 back.
So what should happen here?
1. DH pays him the $220 pay and then we are short $220 for the hotel while Friend B doesn't pay anymore $ 2. DH pays him the $220 back and then asks Friend B to give $110 more so that it is now split 50/50 3. Friend A loses his money and doesn't get paid back
While it sucks that A had to cancel, that's on him. It's last minute and it's not cool to leave your friends in the lurch. They could have chosen a cheaper hotel (possibly) if it was just the two of them.
Is there any way to reduce the room rate of it's just two adults sharing and not 3? If so, then maybe I'd reconsider.
While it sucks that A had to cancel, that's on him. It's last minute and it's not cool to leave your friends in the lurch. They could have chosen a cheaper hotel (possibly) if it was just the two of them.
Is there any way to reduce the room rate of it's just two adults sharing and not 3? If so, then maybe I'd reconsider.
Unfortunately no. They are there for a convention type thing, so hotel prices are high because of it. Friend A canceled yesterday and hotel starts today.
Post by starryfish on Sept 24, 2015 12:40:54 GMT -5
Okay thanks all. Option 3 was my thought too, but my DH mentioned giving him back the $, and I was like ummm no? I think he feels bad bc Friend A doesnt make much money. But it was his poor choices that lead to this. If it was for a different reason, I might feel differently.
Did they book this room because he was going? If they would have gotten a smaller room or a cheaper room if he wasn't going, then I think that should be discussed. If this is the room they would have gotten anyway, then I think he should get his money back.
To be honest, if I was in this situation, I'd give my friend his money back. I'd be annoyed, but I wouldn't treat my friend as if I'm a business. He's not going, so I wouldn't want him to have to subsidize my trip. Besides, the potential for ill will here is too high.
Did they book this room because he was going? If they would have gotten a smaller room or a cheaper room if he wasn't going, then I think that should be discussed. If this is the room they would have gotten anyway, then I think he should get his money back.
To be honest, if I was in this situation, I'd give my friend his money back. I'd be annoyed, but I wouldn't treat my friend as if I'm a business. He's not going, so I wouldn't want him to have to subsidize my trip. Besides, the potential for ill will here is too high.
Did they book this room because he was going? If they would have gotten a smaller room or a cheaper room if he wasn't going, then I think that should be discussed. If this is the room they would have gotten anyway, then I think he should get his money back.
To be honest, if I was in this situation, I'd give my friend his money back. I'd be annoyed, but I wouldn't treat my friend as if I'm a business. He's not going, so I wouldn't want him to have to subsidize my trip. Besides, the potential for ill will here is too high.
No, same room anyways.
Then no, I would give my friend his money back. It's one thing for a business to treat a consumer this way, but if they are really friends, why would your husband and the other guy want his friend to pay for something he's not enjoying? It doesn't really matter why he's not going. He's not going and this is the same room they would have booked without him--I wouldn't treat a friend like this, especially one who sounds like he needs the money at this point.
The ID thing is weird, though. He can get a state-issued ID or even use a passport if he has one.
Then no, I would give my friend his money back. It's one thing for a business to treat a consumer this way, but if they are really friends, why would your husband and the other guy want his friend to pay for something he's not enjoying? It doesn't really matter why he's not going. He's not going and this is the same room they would have booked without him--I wouldn't treat a friend like this, especially one who sounds like he needs the money at this point.
The ID thing is weird, though. He can get a state-issued ID or even use a passport if he has one.
I dont think he has a passport. I think what happened was he had to renew his license and they wouldn't renew it until he paid the tickets?
Also, I don't really think option 2 is possible. We are having a hard time getting Friend B to pay his full share (he only gave $180 when he knew it was $220). So I doubt he would cover another $110 for friend B. So really, either WE have to eat the $220 or Friend A doesn't get his money back.
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Ehhh, if I were actually in this situation, I'd give my friend his money back. He's obviously not great at managing money (see: unpaid parking tickets and losing license) and he's probably already out at least a bit of money on the flight. I MIGHT say something like, "Is it OK, if I give you $100 because I'm still waiting on $$ from Jimmy and the hotel is non-refundable" or something. I hope my friends would help me out in a difficult spot as well.
Also, I don't really think option 2 is possible. We are having a hard time getting Friend B to pay his full share (he only gave $180 when he knew it was $220). So I doubt he would cover another $110 for friend B. So really, either WE have to eat the $220 or Friend A doesn't get his money back.
Based on this, what I would do is talk to Friend B and see if he's willing to cover the extra cost. if he says yes and ONCE YOUR DH HAS THE MONEY, then I'd give Friend A his money back.
But if Friend B says "no" OR says "yes" but doesn't come through, then "too bad, so sad" for friend A.
And your DH can tell A this. "I have to talk to B first. This impacts both of us too. I can't cover more than 2/3's of the room.".
I see both sides to this - this is A's problem of his own making, BUT as he is a friend and if he never signed up, the room cost would still be the same - I'd want ot give him his money back.
BUT it absolutely should not fall to your DH to cover the cost. If Friend B doesn't agree and doesn't want to pay A back, then A doesn't get his $$.
Then no, I would give my friend his money back. It's one thing for a business to treat a consumer this way, but if they are really friends, why would your husband and the other guy want his friend to pay for something he's not enjoying? It doesn't really matter why he's not going. He's not going and this is the same room they would have booked without him--I wouldn't treat a friend like this, especially one who sounds like he needs the money at this point.
The ID thing is weird, though. He can get a state-issued ID or even use a passport if he has one.
This is where I'm at. Yeah, friend A was stupid. But, I'd likely give him back his money. Sounds like he might need it to pay off some parking tickets, anyways.
Then no, I would give my friend his money back. It's one thing for a business to treat a consumer this way, but if they are really friends, why would your husband and the other guy want his friend to pay for something he's not enjoying? It doesn't really matter why he's not going. He's not going and this is the same room they would have booked without him--I wouldn't treat a friend like this, especially one who sounds like he needs the money at this point.
The ID thing is weird, though. He can get a state-issued ID or even use a passport if he has one.
I dont think he has a passport. I think what happened was he had to renew his license and they wouldn't renew it until he paid the tickets?
Also, I don't really think option 2 is possible. We are having a hard time getting Friend B to pay his full share (he only gave $180 when he knew it was $220). So I doubt he would cover another $110 for friend B. So really, either WE have to eat the $220 or Friend A doesn't get his money back.
I know this is not the question, but it doesn't sound like your husband's friends can afford the luxury of a vacation right now.
Also, I don't really think option 2 is possible. We are having a hard time getting Friend B to pay his full share (he only gave $180 when he knew it was $220). So I doubt he would cover another $110 for friend B. So really, either WE have to eat the $220 or Friend A doesn't get his money back.
Based on this, what I would do is talk to Friend B and see if he's willing to cover the extra cost. if he says yes and ONCE YOUR DH HAS THE MONEY, then I'd give Friend A his money back.
But if Friend B says "no" OR says "yes" but doesn't come through, then "too bad, so sad" for friend A.
And your DH can tell A this. "I have to talk to B first. This impacts both of us too. I can't cover more than 2/3's of the room.".
I see both sides to this - this is A's problem of his own making, BUT as he is a friend and if he never signed up, the room cost would still be the same - I'd want ot give him his money back.
BUT it absolutely should not fall to your DH to cover the cost. If Friend B doesn't agree and doesn't want to pay A back, then A doesn't get his $$.
Yea this is what I was thinking....we give $110 back and then make Friend A get the other $110 from Friend B.
Also, he booked his flight on SW, so he is not out that money completely.
Post by boiler717 on Sept 24, 2015 13:27:00 GMT -5
It sounds like the total is $660? I would give the friend $70 back, and let him know he needs to get the other $150 from Friend B since B has only paid $180 towards the hotel.
It sounds like the total is $660? I would give the friend $70 back, and let him know he needs to get the other $150 from Friend B since B has only paid $180 towards the hotel.
This should be one of the options. Why is it on your DH to reimburse friend A?
It sounds like the total is $660? I would give the friend $70 back, and let him know he needs to get the other $150 from Friend B since B has only paid $180 towards the hotel.
If the friend had not been able to come in the first place, would your H and the other friend have gone? Like was part of the decision "hey this will cost me $220 because there are 3 of us" or would your H have gone if the cost was $330?
No they still would have went.
I just don't want to be on the hook for all $220.
I think we will just give the $70 back and tell Friend A to get the rest from friend B
If the friend had not been able to come in the first place, would your H and the other friend have gone? Like was part of the decision "hey this will cost me $220 because there are 3 of us" or would your H have gone if the cost was $330?
No they still would have went.
I just don't want to be on the hook for all $220.
I think we will just give the $70 back and tell Friend A to get the rest from friend B
Post by msmerymac on Sept 24, 2015 14:22:58 GMT -5
I might - MIGHT - split the difference and give 1/2 the money back. If the total amount is $660, you'd be giving friend back $110, so your husband and the other friend would each be paying $275. But I would only do that if the other friend agrees or suggests it. And obviously he has to front the money.
It's weird that he's only paid $180. Did you husband call him out on it and ask if he miscounted the money?
I might - MIGHT - split the difference and give 1/2 the money back. If the total amount is $660, you'd be giving friend back $110, so your husband and the other friend would each be paying $275. But I would only do that if the other friend agrees or suggests it. And obviously he has to front the money.
It's weird that he's only paid $180. Did you husband call him out on it and ask if he miscounted the money?
He did and he said he was only paying $10 more....which still isn't the full amount. I will let my DH deal with that
I would never pay for Friend A's stupidity. If I had $220 to spend on crap, I'd spend it on crap for myself, not to subsidize Friend A who made poor choices and cancelled at the last minute for a dumb reason.
I would have a different view if it was an emergency like a last minute funeral.
I am just curious whether the people who think your husband shouldn't have given any of the money back would think if the facts were slightly different. That is, what if the friend had not yet paid for his part of the room and then decided he wasn't going. Would people still be saying that he should pay up the $220?
It sounds like the total is $660? I would give the friend $70 back, and let him know he needs to get the other $150 from Friend B since B has only paid $180 towards the hotel.
I am just curious whether the people who think your husband shouldn't have given any of the money back would think if the facts were slightly different. That is, what if the friend had not yet paid for his part of the room and then decided he wasn't going. Would people still be saying that he should pay up the $220?
We were in a slightly similar situation a couple months ago. Our group of friends rented a house for an extended weekend. I took care of the money and paid. DH and I ended up going there but ending up leaving the same day because I was sick. I did NOT ask NOR did any of my friends offer to give my money back (meaning they would have had to pay more money themselves). I am still a little bit upset about them not offering....and have distanced myself from them since then (this was kind of like of the last straw for me).
Also, I feel differently since I was sick, and it wasn't because I didn't pay some parking tickets.