Uncontested Divorce - Lawyer? No

[steph96]

My STBXH (ah that feels great to say!) said that he doesn't want to fight anything. We've seen signs on the side of the road for $150 Uncontested divorces and he's pushing to just do that. I told my brother that and he said that with his first wife, they just bought a template online and DIY'd it (this was 11 years ago). Whatttttt. Are either of these options legit? Idk what to do.

Also, if I'm signing the house over to him, we would just need to have him refinance into his name only and then me sign a quit claim deed, right?

[kooshball]

I would still be consulting my own lawyer.

[bex1973]

I would get a lawyer. Especially with the house stuff included.

[katfco]

My mom got a lawyer to make sure all assets and debts were fairly and legally taken care of.

[friendz4eva]

You can divorce pro se, with no attorney representing you. Check your state court website and they will most likely provide you with info regarding divorces and what needs to be filed, etc.
GL on the next chapter of your life!

[Leeham Rimes]

I would still hire a lawyer. It could be one for the both of you, I’ve seen that in uncontested divorces, but I don’t think I’d DIY it. I think my local court has a mediation program for such things but they had disqualifiers (such as children). So it’s not hiring a lawyer but it’s not DIY either.

[calamity]

I would also hire counsel. I dont' know your marriage at all, but just because it is calm right now does not mean that it will continue to be.

Wishing you all the best!

[kooshball]

Jan 15, 2018 12:57:04 GMT -5 Leeham Rimes said:

I would still hire a lawyer. It could be one for the both of you, I’ve seen that in uncontested divorces, but I don’t think I’d DIY it. I think my local court has a mediation program for such things but they had disqualifiers (such as children). So it’s not hiring a lawyer but it’s not DIY either.

I wouldn't share a lawyer unless you have another lawyer advising you. 

[cuddlyevil]

I would hire one if only to make sure that you have covered all of your bases.

[pandorica]

When I got a divorce, I did it all myself using the forms online for my state. It was stressful and kind of confusing, but cheap! We had no kids or real estate or really any assets.

[vicky]

Get your own lawyer.

[lilac05]

Please get a lawyer for yourself. I don't know of anyone who has gotten a lawyer and regretted it, but I know several who tried to DIY or share and regret it.

Right now, you just want to be DONE. I get it. Totally understandable. But in the interest of being DONE, I'm afraid that you'd give him more than what is fair and then you'll feel differently about it 10 years down the road.

[jenny1980]

Get a lawyer! 

The only way I'd skip one would be if you didn't have RE or other assets. I assume you guys also have savings, retirement accounts, etc. etc. 

[kitkat1502]

If there are children or shared assets then I recommend for a lawyer. Because things are amicable now doesn't mean that will always be the case. Have a professional make sure you're protected.

[kooshball]

You can have an amicable divorce and still have your own lawyer.

[esdreturns]

I had an uncontested divorce, but I still hired my own lawyer. My Ex-H didn't though and just signed whatever my lawyer drew up.

You can do it yourself (although IDK if that varies by state, you can in mine). I looked into doing that since we agreed on everything, but I'm super lazy and there was a ton of paperwork. Even though I consider myself to be fairly smart, I wasn't in a place to make sure I understood everything correctly and I didn't want to delay anything because I filled something out wrong.

ETA: I hope this doesn't come off as creepy, but I'm really proud of you. I hope things go smoothly for you!

[Deleted]

Since you have shared assets you will need a lawyer.

[Aloe Vera]

I agree with everyone else. Since you have assets, get a lawyer. It will be more expensive than the DIY option but not by much if everything stays amicable.

My divorce was supposed to be amicable. ExH and I agreed on everything. We had no kids but we had a house.
He decided to get a lawyer because I got one to make sure I would be protected and because I didn't know anything about divorces. It became less amicable real fast. His lawyer fought everything we had agreed on. $8K later, exH understood his lawyer was a tool and we settled for what we had decided in the beginning.

[jigsy]

When I divorced, I didn't have a lawyer. It was very amicable, and while we did have a house - we agreed to sell and split the money down the line. At one point, XH wanted to keep the house, and it started to get contentious because I demanded he pay me out based on the equity of the list price while he insisted I should get less because there was no guarantee that we would get full price. I think if he had wanted to keep the house, we would have needed a lawyer to both feel like things were "fair".

If I had a kid, I would 100% have a lawyer.

[nachos]

We had kids and a house, and did it without a lawyer. Our separation agreement essentially became the terms of our divorce.

Do what YOU feel comfortable with. (I have no regrets)

[keyslover]

Lawyer up.

Adding a lawyer (or two) doesn’t mean it becomes a fight. It allows you to have someone there who will protect you and look out for your interests.
It will also ensure i’s are dotted and t’s are crossed. There shouldn’t be any surprises down the road.

[nsl]

My sister and her H didn't have any children or assets when they decided to get divorced, so they went without lawyers. She regretted that decision immensely (to the tune of tens of thousands of dollars and a near-bankruptcy) when she realized a year after the divorce that he'd hidden a joint credit card account from her, charged it to the hilt, and left her holding the bag on the debt. Even though they'd been divorced when the charges were made she was still liable because her name was on the account. The lawyer she had to hire to deal with the credit card issue convinced her that if she'd had counsel during the divorce the account would have been found and cancelled prior to filing.

All of which is to say that I would get a lawyer when divorcing even if we owned nothing substantial together, and wouldn't trust that the divorce would remain amicable just because you're both in agreement now about dissolving the marriage and how you want to split your assets.

[sapphireblue]

My exH and I were amicable and worked out on our own who would get what stuff (we didn't have kids).

We toyed with the idea of totally doing it ourselves. We also were very interested in the places (usually tropical and an easy flight from the US) where you can get a quickie divorce. Like, you pay a fee, they pick you up at the airport, you go to court, it's taken care of, you stay a night in paradise, and fly home. But my state was one of the ones that didn't allow those.

Ultimately, I got a lawyer but she ended up meeting with him as well to be sure he agreed with the division of assets I gave her. It cost a flat fee of $3000. He didn't get one.

I think it was better to have one, there were minor things that seemed a bit complicated that were all taken care of for me such as giving him the ownership of a car, him signing off on any interest in our house and our dog, etc.

The dog was the biggest thing we fought over!

[vmars]

I wouldn’t do one of those cheap places, generally they have bad forms and advice. Is there any retirement accounts that have to be divided? You would need to hire an accountant to create an order so those can be divided, but you don’t have to have an attorney. Your local court should have the forms. Review them and then decide if you are up for the task of doing it yourselves.

[daisyn]

You can hire an attorney as a mediator if you want to save on costs. We did that and it went fairly smoothly except for some kid related issues but it doesn’t sound like that would impact you

[JayhawkGirl]

Given how unpleasant both he and his mom sound to be, I would get an attorney

[nomad100]

We are doing our divorce DIY, sort of. I work for a law firm and have an atty friend I am working with to look over our forms (he is a family law atty). We have a strong pre-nup and no kids. I am the one with the assets I want to protect. House is our only joint asset and we have a separate agreement in regards to how that is to be handled in case of divorce.

So we are just waiting on the appraisal so I can draft our divorce agreement. Once I have that info, I will just have my friend look everything over before I file. I just need to confirm with my friend on some timing issues too so that when STBX signs the quitclaim it doesn't uncap the taxable value of the house. It has increased significantly since we bought it and I want to keep the old taxable value as the basis for increases.

[AutumnRose25]

The two of you don’t have to deal with this process the same way.

He doesn’t have to get a lawyer if he doesn’t want to.

But, I don’t see why you would decide what you do based on his choice.

[dexteroni]

Get a lawyer. He may feel that way now, but he may change his tune later as he goes through the range of emotions that come with divorce. Especially once he starts talking with his family, friends, coworkers, etc. and they all start offering their bad advice. So protect yourself. If he really doesn't contest anything, then great, it will be a relatively cheap and fast divorce. But if he starts to pull shit, it's worth the attorney's fee to protect yourself financially. Good luck!

[marylennox]

I would still get your own lawyer. XH and I came to our own agreements on everything (custody, support, assets, house) which did help keep costs down. IMO it was definitely still worth it to have input and guidance through the process from an attorney who I felt had my interest in mind. GL