Post by blackkitty on Sept 18, 2012 11:15:24 GMT -5
Just don't do it You know this Figure out another way. Stand on your own two feet and stop being co-dependent. You are a grown ass woman. I thought you posted the other day about being able to start saving money or something.
Just don't do it You know this Figure out another way. Stand on your own two feet and stop being co-dependent. You are a grown ass woman. I thought you posted the other day about being able to start saving money or something.
I am saving money. I'm doing the envelope system with cash and figuring it all out. I will be on my feet again.
Just don't do it You know this Figure out another way. Stand on your own two feet and stop being co-dependent. You are a grown ass woman. I thought you posted the other day about being able to start saving money or something.
I am saving money. I'm doing the envelope system with cash and figuring it all out. I will be on my feet again.
But why can't you do that on your own?? Don't rely on ANYONE to get you there...this is about you and you getting your feet on solid ground.
Just don't do it You know this Figure out another way. Stand on your own two feet and stop being co-dependent. You are a grown ass woman. I thought you posted the other day about being able to start saving money or something.
I am saving money. I'm doing the envelope system with cash and figuring it all out. I will be on my feet again.
Why can't you stay where you're at with the extra income from your second job and just be on your own two feet for a while? I don't get it.
Oh yes, forgot to mention but I thought I did, which is why this is confusing to me... my cousin A is coming back from Finland and moving her bf into the apartment. I need to leave.
Why can't you stay where you're at with the extra income from your second job and just be on your own two feet for a while? I don't get it.
Oh yes, forgot to mention but I thought I did, which is why this is confusing to me... my cousin A is coming back from Finland and moving her bf into the apartment. I need to leave.
Why can't you stay where you're at with the extra income from your second job and just be on your own two feet for a while? I don't get it.
Oh yes, forgot to mention but I thought I did, which is why this is confusing to me... my cousin A is coming back from Finland and moving her bf into the apartment. I need to leave.
SAY NO. You can't just move your bf into an apartment without getting the OK from your roommate.
Oh yes, forgot to mention but I thought I did, which is why this is confusing to me... my cousin A is coming back from Finland and moving her bf into the apartment. I need to leave.
SAY NO. You can't just move your bf into an apartment without getting the OK from your roommate.
I'm just subletting. I'm not a roommate. I was supposed to take on her apartment for the month while she was gone for work. She'll be back next week. I will be staying until the end of the month.
L, I know you want all of this to go well. I'm worried, though. Is there anyplace else you could go?
I know you love J and that he takes good care of you, and you have been doing really, really well recently. I am concerned, however, that cohabitating might bring up some of your issues with codependency. I'd really hate to see you backtrack. You've made great strides.
L, I know you want all of this to go well. I'm worried, though. Is there anyplace else you could go?
I know you love J and that he takes good care of you, and you have been doing really, really well recently. I am concerned, however, that cohabitating might bring up some of your issues with codependency. I'd really hate to see you backtrack. You've made great strides.
gozf I know. I'm worried too, but I feel like I have to suck it up and go. I feel the reason I'm making these strides is because I'm doing things by not being afraid anymore. I have to go in with the mindset that this may not be forever and thats OK. I have to live in the now, but plan for later, kwim? That's been my mantra these days. Live now, plan for later.
I'm trying so hard. I just want to be happy again. I feel like I'm happy. OR at least happier these days. Worst case, I save some money and peace out, right?
and what if you both use this opportunity to throw a little extra cash around, because, let's face it, it's nice to have some free money to use....and then you have nothing to bail yourself out with if/when it goes south?
and what if you both use this opportunity to throw a little extra cash around, because, let's face it, it's nice to have some free money to use....and then you have nothing to bail yourself out with if/when it goes south?
I don't plan on throwing cash around at all. I plan on living very strict within my budget because I need to. I need a cushion. I'm 28 years old and I'm bankrupt. I NEED to do this and I'm gung ho. I need an emergency fund in the LEAST.
Plus it's a goal that I'm setting and it will be a challenge for me to follow through. I will do this. I'm stubborn.
L, I know you want all of this to go well. I'm worried, though. Is there anyplace else you could go?
I know you love J and that he takes good care of you, and you have been doing really, really well recently. I am concerned, however, that cohabitating might bring up some of your issues with codependency. I'd really hate to see you backtrack. You've made great strides.
gozf I know. I'm worried too, but I feel like I have to suck it up and go. I feel the reason I'm making these strides is because I'm doing things by not being afraid anymore. I have to go in with the mindset that this may not be forever and thats OK. I have to live in the now, but plan for later, kwim? That's been my mantra these days. Live now, plan for later.
I'm trying so hard. I just want to be happy again. I feel like I'm happy. OR at least happier these days. Worst case, I save some money and peace out, right?
No offense, but what the fuck kind of mantra is that??!
Don't you think half the reason you get into these messes is because you DON'T stop to think about the ramifcations of your decisions?
I consider myself to be successful in life. I have an advanced degree, my car is paid off, I own my house (not outright but I manage a mortgage on my own). I managed that on a fairly small salary. And how did I manage that? Because I THOUGHT about the future! Everytime I wanted to impulse buy a cute new purse I said to myself "Hmm...If I buy this purse, that is XXXXX money less than I am going to have for YYYYYY future purchase."
gozf I know. I'm worried too, but I feel like I have to suck it up and go. I feel the reason I'm making these strides is because I'm doing things by not being afraid anymore. I have to go in with the mindset that this may not be forever and thats OK. I have to live in the now, but plan for later, kwim? That's been my mantra these days. Live now, plan for later.
I'm trying so hard. I just want to be happy again. I feel like I'm happy. OR at least happier these days. Worst case, I save some money and peace out, right?
No offense, but what the fuck kind of mantra is that??!
Don't you think half the reason you get into these messes is because you DON'T stop to think about the ramifcations of your decisions?
I consider myself to be successful in life. I have an advanced degree, my car is paid off, I own my house (not outright but I manage a mortgage on my own). I managed that on a fairly small salary. And how did I manage that? Because I THOUGHT about the future! Everytime I wanted to impulse buy a cute new purse I said to myself "Hmm...If I buy this purse, that is XXXXX money less than I am going to have for YYYYYY future purchase."
Yes I understand what you're saying and I hear you. I'm trying to plan now. I'm putting money aside out of every paycheck to get my shit together. So I am planning. Maybe how I said it was fucked up. I just can't be afraid anymore. I've lived afraid for so long and was in so many fucked up situations. I haven't purchased anything for myself in months. I've been up to date on my bills, and I'm struggling but I'm doing it with money to spare. Thats why I got the 2nd job, that's why I'm doing what's best financially. I'm trying to make headway here.
and what if you both use this opportunity to throw a little extra cash around, because, let's face it, it's nice to have some free money to use....and then you have nothing to bail yourself out with if/when it goes south?
I don't plan on throwing cash around at all. I plan on living very strict within my budget because I need to. I need a cushion. I'm 28 years old and I'm bankrupt. I NEED to do this and I'm gung ho. I need an emergency fund in the LEAST.
Plus it's a goal that I'm setting and it will be a challenge for me to follow through. I will do this. I'm stubborn.
No one plans to overspend...but it's as easy as "babe, I'm too tired to make dinner, let's go out".
And then you say that you're living for the now, not the future...these comments don't add up.
I don't plan on throwing cash around at all. I plan on living very strict within my budget because I need to. I need a cushion. I'm 28 years old and I'm bankrupt. I NEED to do this and I'm gung ho. I need an emergency fund in the LEAST.
Plus it's a goal that I'm setting and it will be a challenge for me to follow through. I will do this. I'm stubborn.
No one plans to overspend...but it's as easy as "babe, I'm too tired to make dinner, let's go out".
And then you say that you're living for the now, not the future...these comments don't add up.
See but I've been good with that for months and months. I cook every meal. I'll make extra in the beginning of the week to take for lunches. I'm really set into a routine with that, so I know it will work.
No one plans to overspend...but it's as easy as "babe, I'm too tired to make dinner, let's go out".
And then you say that you're living for the now, not the future...these comments don't add up.
See but I've been good with that for months and months. I cook every meal. I'll make extra in the beginning of the week to take for lunches. I'm really set into a routine with that, so I know it will work.
Because you've HAD to....soon you'll have options. Again, no one says "I'm going to overspend" but in my opinion, it's easy to do when you've just freed up money that you didn't have prior to.
Post by explorer2001 on Sept 18, 2012 12:08:30 GMT -5
I think I have a solution. Take the $245 extra, half the cig budget, half the alcohol budget and $60 from the phone budget since you are switching to prepaid, and get a studio apartment for $390 a month
ETA keep the second job and save the $300 a month.
I think I have a solution. Take the $245 extra, half the cig budget, half the alcohol budget and $60 from the phone budget since you are switching to prepaid, and get a studio apartment for $390 a month
Holy shit...how did I miss that alcohol was in the budget? Who budgets for that??? I have $0 in my budget for alcohol. Andplusalso, aren't you on meds?? Should you be mixing?
See but I've been good with that for months and months. I cook every meal. I'll make extra in the beginning of the week to take for lunches. I'm really set into a routine with that, so I know it will work.
Because you've HAD to....soon you'll have options. Again, no one says "I'm going to overspend" but in my opinion, it's easy to do when you've just freed up money that you didn't have prior to.
I'm planning to live like I did before. Same money, same spending, except this time around, I can buy groceries and have money to save. I'm so gung ho on the saving for real. I won't let you guys down, because I won't let myself down. I'm not gonna fuck up my life anymore. I'm trying so hard.
I just miss my pugs so much b/c xH has them. And I want my own dog. I have been doing really good getting myself together except for the work dude snafu. I seriously have been thinking long and hard about what I want. I think it's achievable. J and I work different schedules, we still will only see each other mainly on the weekends. Same as now. Instead of going back and forth between apartments/houses now we'll be in the same house. It just seems easier to me because we spend a lot of time driving back and forth.
I totally feel you. I had 2 pugs and lost them in the divorce. I was DEVASTATED. I think I loved them more than my EXH. While I totally see your point and having a dog can be therapeutic in my mind, it is a financial strain.
I want another pug again but havent had the opportunity to. Its hard to come home alone without a cute little puppy but just be ready for vet bills and everything.
I obviously have a different opinion than a lot of the above ladies but I think getting a dog might be therapeutic and allow you to have something to take care.
I just miss my pugs so much b/c xH has them. And I want my own dog. I have been doing really good getting myself together except for the work dude snafu. I seriously have been thinking long and hard about what I want. I think it's achievable. J and I work different schedules, we still will only see each other mainly on the weekends. Same as now. Instead of going back and forth between apartments/houses now we'll be in the same house. It just seems easier to me because we spend a lot of time driving back and forth.
I totally feel you. I had 2 pugs and lost them in the divorce. I was DEVASTATED. I think I loved them more than my EXH. While I totally see your point and having a dog can be therapeutic in my mind, it is a financial strain.
I want another pug again but havent had the opportunity to. Its hard to come home alone without a cute little puppy but just be ready for vet bills and everything.
I obviously have a different opinion than a lot of the above ladies but I think getting a dog might be therapeutic and allow you to have something to take care.
How about herself? She's learning how to take care of herself, and she's starting to do a decent job of it, and no one wants to see that get derailed.
I totally feel you. I had 2 pugs and lost them in the divorce. I was DEVASTATED. I think I loved them more than my EXH. While I totally see your point and having a dog can be therapeutic in my mind, it is a financial strain.
I want another pug again but havent had the opportunity to. Its hard to come home alone without a cute little puppy but just be ready for vet bills and everything.
I obviously have a different opinion than a lot of the above ladies but I think getting a dog might be therapeutic and allow you to have something to take care.
How about herself? She's learning how to take care of herself, and she's starting to do a decent job of it, and no one wants to see that get derailed.