If the baby had a genetic issue that would result in significant care or low quality of life for the kid?
Someone I know just had a downs baby that needs heart surgery. I know adults with downs, but rarely hear about babies or kids with downs. When I looked it up, over90% of downs babies are aborted.
It would have likely ruined my marriage if we were in that position as we were not in agreement as to what to do. And unfortunately there was no way we were going to be on the same page. Our solution was to not do any extra testing during the pregnancy so we would be less likely to end up having to make the decision.
We had to have an amnio and we discussed it beforehand that we would definitely abort. Two reasons - quality of life for the child and due to my own poor health (liver transplant) I wouldnt want to leave a "harder" child with one parent only. And the third reason - we are selfish.
Incompatible with life or very short life, definitely. Low quality of life and significant lifelong care needed (needing assistance with basic things like feeding and toileting) almost definitely. But Down syndrome often doesn't fall within those descriptions, and I have no idea what we would do in the event of a Down syndrome diagnosis. We would be really torn.
Incompatible with life or very short life, definitely. Low quality of life and significant lifelong care needed (needing assistance with basic things like feeding and toileting) almost definitely. But Down syndrome often doesn't fall within those descriptions, and I have no idea what we would do in the event of a Down syndrome diagnosis. We would be really torn.
No. Dh and I are both pro-life. We also believe that if God chooses to give us a disabled child, it's because He thinks we are capable of carrying for that child.
Heart problems, including surgery, are pretty par for the course for a lot of children with Downs. That doesn't mean long-term there will be significant care or low QOL
No. Dh and I are both pro-life. We also believe that if God chooses to give us a disabled child, it's because He thinks we are capable of carrying for that child.
Anything likely to result in giving birth to a baby that would immediately die, absolutely.
Short life, painful/constant medical procedures to prolong life: probably. Especially if there were no real chance of making it through childhood.
If it were "simply" a matter of expense/effort/care/therapies or a disease (like cystic fibrosis) where diagnosis is not 100% a guarantee of poor quality of life, no.
No. It's one of my biggest fears because I don't know how I would handle it because I'm not a patient person. However, I am firmly against abortion so that's not even an option for us.
It all depends on what genetic issue. I don't think I could give you an accurate yes or no I would have to be faced with it. I go back and forth. If it was incompatible with life, yes I would. If not I don't know.
If it were a chromosomal disorder that was incompatible with life, then yes. Anything else and I would have wanted to keep it. DH would have wanted to abort. H's sister has spina bifida and he watched her go through medical hell her whole life. On the other hand, I was a sick kid and now a pediatric nurse so I would want to give the baby a shot. It would have likely been a relationship ender for us.
Post by speckledfrog on Dec 28, 2012 10:05:10 GMT -5
We would have. We did the NT screening and a follow up amnio. It's a very personal decision and not one many people who would terminate talk about but I'm really, really glad I have the option.
Post by SusanBAnthony on Dec 28, 2012 10:34:32 GMT -5
We actually sprt of thought we would abort DS. I had a dating U/S at 6 weeks, and would have been fine aborting at that point. I had CVS at 12 weeks, and seeing that U/S, I couldn't abort. Now, the condition we were considering aborting for is not a huge deal. It can have major complications (about 1% risk of terminal brain tumor for example) but by and large people are fine. And since we couldn't find out until CVS at 12 week, we didn't abort. If I could find out at 6 weeks, I would have aborted, though.
Now, if it was a major quality of life issue for the baby, I would abort at any point up to term. I don't see DS that way, though.
Once upon a time I would have said that if the result would be a short, painful life, then yes I would. HOwever I've read stories about parents who chose not to and the wonderful moments they had with their child, however brief. Though I don't know if I'm strong enough for that. DS doesn't fall into that category for me though, so no.
I'm pretty sure I'm here. Regardless of what the disorder was. And I am not prolife. I am all for women doing what they think is the right thing (abortion), but in my own personal life, I don't think I could ever bring myself to have an abortion.
Post by kangaroo11 on Dec 28, 2012 12:45:37 GMT -5
I would say yes. We had a general conversation about this before the NT scan and I think DH would have gone along with my decision, but luckily we did not have to make that choice.
Post by galaxy8227 on Dec 28, 2012 12:50:46 GMT -5
I know a girl from high school who was placed in this position--their daughter had a condition found in the 2nd trimester (I'm not sure what it's called) that the doctor said would cause the baby not to survive outside the womb. Their daughter lived for 18 days and they have both said it was the best decision they made. Her strength is amazing, I'm not sure if I could do it.