I just want you to know I think you are brillant, have a funny/weird sense of humor, and are gorgeous and intelligent. I also think you really care about people and to be honest if I had a daughter like you I would be so damn proud I could burst. Sorry if this overstepped some internet boundries or something.
Yes, I think so. Though I don't think they understand just how hard I've worked for where I am. They are blue collar folks, and they don't see how the work I do is all that difficult. I think they wish I'd be more family oriented.
Miso-I'll just say that one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me is when you have me props for how I was doing school and work and shit. I really appreciated that...just so you know.
Oh, jigsy, I am so proud of you for so many things, but that was so impressive (and you continue to impress).
I do think about this a lot, particularly when so many mothers here constantly say they are so proud of their children just...well...because.
In my family, I'm not sure "love" was necessarily unconditional. Of course, this could be my own perception, but it felt like I really had to "earn" love.
My mother is proud of me in her own ways. But I think I earned it. And she is far more relaxed today than she was when she was raising us. I think this has a lot to do with her great relationship with her husband now. As a result of her good current marriage, she is happier and is able to be happier about me, too. However, with my mother, it was a constant competition and comparison between my brother and me, and there was simply nothing that I could do to be superior to my brother. My brother is just...better at everything. It's a fact, and it's something I don't try to fight anymore. It just is, and it's much easier for me to be the proudest sister I can be instead of being extremely jealous and inferior-feeling. I know that my mother will always favor my brother, but it doesn't mean that she doesn't love me. She loves me the best she can, and that's fine. I don't have to be the favorite.
I don't think my father is proud of me. He is, however, generally a very unhappy man, so I don't think I should take this personally. Almost everything in life is not good enough and is a disappointment to him, and I'm just another thing on a long list. He is very proud of my brother, though, and they have a pretty good relationship. There is definitely a marked difference in the way he treats my brother. It is instantly evident to even the casual observer. My own relationship with my father is civil but not particularly loving. But he isn't the worst father by any means. He provided for us well financially, and I am very thankful for that. That is a lot more than a lot of people can say. And I suppose hurtful words are preferable to hurtful physical abuse or absence altogether. Everybody has her own issues with her father, and I'm no anomaly for not getting along with mine.
I admire all the mothers here who love their children unconditionally. It is a beautiful thing.
I just want you to know I think you are brillant, have a funny/weird sense of humor, and are gorgeous and intelligent. I also think you really care about people and to be honest if I had a daughter like you I would be so damn proud I could burst. Sorry if this overstepped some internet boundries or something.
Ditto. I know that they seem to be more proud of your bro, but screw them. You are so successful and have made an amazing life for yourself and its really their loss for not seeing it.
I do think about this a lot, particularly when so many mothers here constantly say they are so proud of their children just...well...because.
In my family, I'm not sure "love" was necessarily unconditional. Of course, this could be my own perception, but it felt like I really had to "earn" love.
My mother is proud of me in her own ways. But I think I earned it. And she is far more relaxed today than she was when she was raising us. I think this has a lot to do with her great relationship with her husband now. As a result of her good current marriage, she is happier and is able to be happier about me, too. However, with my mother, it was a constant competition and comparison between my brother and me, and there was simply nothing that I could do to be superior to my brother. My brother is just...better at everything. It's a fact, and it's something I don't try to fight anymore. It just is, and it's much easier for me to be the proudest sister I can be instead of being extremely jealous and inferior-feeling. I know that my mother will always favor my brother, but it doesn't mean that she doesn't love me. She loves me the best she can, and that's fine. I don't have to be the favorite.
I don't think my father is proud of me. He is, however, generally a very unhappy man, so I don't think I should take this personally. Almost everything in life is not good enough and is a disappointment to him, and I'm just another thing on a long list. He is very proud of my brother, though, and they have a pretty good relationship. There is definitely a marked difference in the way he treats my brother. It is instantly evident to even the casual observer. My own relationship with my father is civil but not particularly loving. But he isn't the worst father by any means. He provided for us well financially, and I am very thankful for that. That is a lot more than a lot of people can say. And I suppose hurtful words are preferable to hurtful physical abuse or absence altogether. Everybody has her own issues with her father, and I'm no anomaly for not getting along with mine.
I admire all the mothers here who love their children unconditionally. It is a beautiful thing.
Miso, this breaks my heart. I am proud of you just for being you. You are one of the nicest people here. I am honored to know you and cannot imagine how proud I'd be if you were my daughter.
Miso, this breaks my heart. I am proud of you just for being you. You are one of the nicest people here. I am honored to know you and cannot imagine how proud I'd be if you were my daughter.
womet! No heartbreak! Thank you for the kind words.
Post by LeggsBenedict on Jul 9, 2013 18:23:31 GMT -5
My dad is proud of me simply because he is my dad, and I am his daughter, and he loves me and I haven't murdered anyone. I'm sure my mom is proud of me as well, but I honestly don't know why. I feel like she probably has a reason, but I don't know what it is.
That said, I'm kind of emotionally fragile and weak, and clingy, and nobody understands that better than my mom. So that is most likely why I have such a hard time digesting that she might be proud of me on purpose.
Despite all her negativity and constantly making me feel like she thinks I'm doing it wrong, yes, I know my mom is. I think my dad is but, again, he makes me feel like I'm not doing it right.
I'm very very different than they are, politically, religiously, philosophically, everything, and they have a hard time understanding how I turned out so different that what they had in mind and just seeing and appreciating me for who I am.
My mom has always been proud, she's my biggest supporter. My dad has only recently said he's proud of me. He didn't approve that I only went to community college, that I got married young (23), that H didn't make a lot when we got married, etc.
I can't imagine someone not being proud of you. I believe that you know your family but in the reliably short time wee spent together I admired your sense of humor, accomplishments and overall the person you are. For whatever that's worth, lol.
My mother is proud of me in her own ways. But I think I earned it. However, with my mother, it was a constant competition and comparison between my brother and me, and there was simply nothing that I could do to be superior to my brother. My brother is just...better at everything. It's a fact, and it's something I don't try to fight anymore. It just is, and it's much easier for me to be the proudest sister I can be instead of being extremely jealous and inferior-feeling. I know that my mother will always favor my brother, but it doesn't mean that she doesn't love me. She loves me the best she can, and that's fine. I don't have to be the favorite.
I feel like I could have written this portion despite my answer. My mom did tell me she was proud of me, but not until I had graduated from law school, got a good job, and was almost engaged to H. Up until that point however, I always felt that whatever I did just wasn't quite enough compared to my brother. And even after she said it, I still felt like I had barely crossed the threshold of her pride -- my brother was still, and would always be, her favorite.
My dad was different in that while he didn't say "I'm proud of you" or "I love you" often, I still felt it. I never felt like he was comparing me to anyone; he just took me as is and liked the person I am.
I can't imagine why your dad wouldn't be proud of you. You are a damn awesome person.
I feel like I could have written this portion despite my answer. My mom did tell me she was proud of me, but not until I had graduated from law school, got a good job, and was almost engaged to H. Up until that point however, I always felt that whatever I did just wasn't quite enough compared to my brother. And even after she said it, I still felt like I had barely crossed the threshold of her pride -- my brother was still, and would always be, her favorite.
My dad was different in that while he didn't say "I'm proud of you" or "I love you" often, I still felt it. I never felt like he was comparing me to anyone; he just took me as is and liked the person I am.
I can't imagine why your dad wouldn't be proud of you. You are a damn awesome person.
You are awesome! I am so happy and honored to be your friend.