IHO Sequins, crazy shit your MIL says

[fryjack2]

@quesera My jaw dropped. For real. Your mom is awesome. Remember the post a few days ago (about calling off a wedding) when people were saying they couldn't imagine hitting another person because adults don't do that etc.? Yeah, I am very anti violence, but I might be inclined to slap that bitch if she ever said that about a family member. Holy shit. I would also refuse to interact with her ever again.

[simplyinpenguin]

The only thing my MIL ever said bad (since I rarely speak to her anyways) was when H told them that we were getting married and that, no, we weren't going to have kids. "Then why get married? You can't get married and NOT have kids. It's not how the procession of things go." Mind you, this is a woman who should have NEVER given birth at all, sorry H. We laugh it off now because they have no interest in our lives. My parents on the other hand...I've talked to them so many times about not having kids that it falls on deaf ears. Looks like they're going to see in the years down the road that I was serious.

[Deleted]

I went on a week long trip alone. She wanted to fly out so DH would have someone to cook for him and wouldn't "go hungry". I told her that if a 36 year old man can't figure out how to feed himself for a week, he probably deserved to perish.

[firedancer49]

My MIL used to come over and before she would leave she would move things around in my house. Move picture locations, change decorations on shelves, etc. Pissed me off and she would do it when no one was paying attention. She has yet to do it in the new house.

She also always acts like she can't handle anything, ever. She lives about an hour away and calls DH for the dumbest things and asks him to come over and do whatever it is. She now just makes a list and we visit every so often and just check off of the list.

She has said a lot of fucked up stuff to me, but I have honestly just shuffled it aside and block it out. I'm usually very quiet and reserved at her house so that we don't argue. She's a great woman, and has a huge heart, she just has a lot of her own issues she can't get past and it ends up coming out to everyone else.

[pixelpassion]

Sept 10, 2013 13:31:34 GMT -5 firedancer49 said:

My MIL used to come over and before she would leave she would move things around in my house. Move picture locations, change decorations on shelves, etc. Pissed me off and she would do it when no one was paying attention. She has yet to do it in the new house.

My stepbrother's MIL will go around and redecorate his and my SIL's house without any consent or anything when she's alone at their house watching their son. 

I don't get how people think they can just do this to other people's stuff. I would get all HULK SMASH if MIL did this. 

[mrs.jacinthe]

I debated over which thing to post (there are a number of side-eye-worthy options) for a while, but this one is my favorite. Last year, MIL came to visit by herself for a week and FIL was going to come out and join her, then they would go home together. She's a nice lady, very conservative, etc, so we have some interesting "discussions", but I think she thinks I hate her - either that or she's just crazy. While she was staying with us (just her), I still had to work so I was in my office. In the same house. She's an artist so she was sketching out on the deck. I get an IM from R asking whether we had any tissues without lotion. I was all ?? but he said that MIL had called or texted FIL - on the other side of the country - to ask him to bring non-lotion tissues. FIL texted R to ask HIM if we had any non-lotion tissues. So then R asked me, and I got a box out and was all breezy about it when I gave them to her, but WTF? Why not just ask me for the dang tissues, you know, because we were sharing the same 900 square feet and it would be easier than a cross-country game of telephone.

[wowhead]

I think I could do this for days

MIL was having a birthday party for FIL. H and I and SIL (their daughter) and STBBIL all went to visit (we all were living in different cities at the time) and attend the party. Later BIL told me that MIL told him that if anyone were to ask where he was living that he was to lie. She didn't want anyone to know they were living together.

On another occasion, we were all visiting. BIL had gotten SIL an engagement ring and asked the parents permission to propose. They told him no. SIL was really busy with her fellowship and it just wasn't a good time. He needed to wait longer. H and I had to get involved, have a conversation with BIL and then MIL/FIL. They did get engaged that weekend and I don't think SIL has any idea this ever happened.

Any time MIL offends anyone, she blames it on a language barrier regardless of what language it's in. They have lived in the States for 33 years and she works in an English speaking school. She has a pretty damn good grasp on both English and Sindi. It's just her cop-out.

[LeggsBenedict]

Sept 10, 2013 13:44:00 GMT -5 pixelpassion said:

Sept 10, 2013 13:31:34 GMT -5 firedancer49 said:

My MIL used to come over and before she would leave she would move things around in my house. Move picture locations, change decorations on shelves, etc. Pissed me off and she would do it when no one was paying attention. She has yet to do it in the new house.

My stepbrother's MIL will go around and redecorate his and my SIL's house without any consent or anything when she's alone at their house watching their son. 

I don't get how people think they can just do this to other people's stuff. I would get all HULK SMASH if MIL did this. 

mine used her "in case of emergency" key to renovate while we were on our honeymoon.

[aprilsails]

I have gasped at I don't know how many of these. My MIL is a saint and she is destroying her own health to take care of her selfish family.

If you want to talk crazy though, my own Mother is the prime qualifier. She made me handsewn heirloom baby clothes for my wedding shower. My friends still cannot believe it.

[Alyssa]

My MIL once asked me if I remember to work my kegal muscles.  I thought that was stepping over boundaries.

[mandabean]

Most recently my MIL said I should use semen as a moisturizer. Her reasoning-it's natural and free!

[kdubs923]

My MIL is consistently BSC. Unfortunately, a lot of the stories would need a lengthy back story of the last 15 years I've known her. These are the shorter, easier gems.

When talking about my pregnancy & if I'll breastfeed, when I say yes, I do intend to breastfeed she replied with. 'Oh. I thought so. It seems like you'd be into that sort of thing.' (Um, what sort of thing? Getting my nipples sucked?)

When she introduces me to friends it's, 'This is Kdubs923, she's the one from a broken home, poor thing'. (Yes, having divorced parents in this day & age is completely unheard of)

Before DH and I were engaged, we had dated for a long time. DH's parents decided to pay for the whole family to go to Disney World & were generous enough to include me. So DH's brothers, their wives, kids, etc.... 12 of us total. We had to share a room with his parents. When MIL walked into the hotel room & saw there was not enough room for a cot, she freaked out. She was horrified that DH (then BF) would HAVE TO SHARE A BED (we were 21/22 years old and had dated since high school). So she made me sleep under the covers & DH on top of the covers. (Yes, because if your parents sleeping 3 ft away doesn't kill the mood, then a sheet is certainly going to stop us)

[Deleted]

Sept 10, 2013 13:31:34 GMT -5 firedancer49 said:

My MIL used to come over and before she would leave she would move things around in my house. Move picture locations, change decorations on shelves, etc. Pissed me off and she would do it when no one was paying attention. She has yet to do it in the new house.

She also always acts like she can't handle anything, ever. She lives about an hour away and calls DH for the dumbest things and asks him to come over and do whatever it is. She now just makes a list and we visit every so often and just check off of the list.

I think your MIL is related to mine. She especially liked to pull the second paragraph all the time until DH finally shut that down. (She also has 2 brothers, 3 nephews over 40, 2 BIL and countless others within a 10 minute drive who could help her, but it had to be her baaaabbbyyyyy booooyyyyy.

Some gems from mine, mind you she usually only pulls this when nobody else can hear her, then denies it later:

*a few weeks post partum with DD1- "I know you're trying to lose weight, since you got so fat while pregnant, so I brought dessert for everyone else to help you with your self control

*Christmas after we had DD1, but before we married she addressed our Christmas card to DH and DD1 only, then proceeded at the family gathering to order me to take the pictures of the family, saying I can't be in them since "you're not really family" (but she was pregnant with SIL before they got married)

*to me the morning after my mom passed away in 2009: well, now that I'm DD1's only grandma we won't have to worry about her calling me Grandma (MIL firstname) will we?

*weekend after my dad passed away in 2011: so, now that I'm the only grandparent I won't have to share holidays with YOUR family anymore

*after I went back to work in 2010 after being a SAHM for 3 years (due to pay cut, hour cut at DH job): I can't believe you would let someone else raise your children

*in 2011 I had emergency laparoscopic surgery due to a rupturing ectopic pregnancy and while i was being prepped she told me I shouldn't bother DH at work, told me it was for the best- since I wouldn't be raising them myself (the kids were in daycare while I worked), told me 2 days after that I needed to "suck it up and support DH going back to work that day" (I was on strict orders not to lift, walk, carry anything, pretty much bed rest until cleared by my OB as I had lost a lot of blood, but I went back to work 6 days later. But 2 years prior when she had a partial hysterectomy, also laparoscopically, she took 6 weeks to recover and had his aunt move in to help)

She has been cut out, with only a few incidences in the past 2 years. 

[moolarkey]

My MIL and FIL were both peaches, I just don't know which one was more peachier. H pretty much cut off ties with them, we only saw them once a year. He did that when he went to college, it made his life so much better.

My younger SIL, the good DIL, really tried to get along w/everyone. I love her a lot but.... she had 4 daughters. The nerve. BIL wanted a SON (so bad he just about couldn't stand it) but he loves his girls.

FIL, on the other hand, told SIL it was her DUTY !!!! to keep having babies until they had a boy because BIL wants a boy.

FIL wasn't just a peach, he was the whole orchard.

[firedancer49]

Sept 10, 2013 15:42:07 GMT -5 trixieflips said:

Sept 10, 2013 13:31:34 GMT -5 firedancer49 said:

My MIL used to come over and before she would leave she would move things around in my house. Move picture locations, change decorations on shelves, etc. Pissed me off and she would do it when no one was paying attention. She has yet to do it in the new house.

She also always acts like she can't handle anything, ever. She lives about an hour away and calls DH for the dumbest things and asks him to come over and do whatever it is. She now just makes a list and we visit every so often and just check off of the list.

I think your MIL is related to mine. She especially liked to pull the second paragraph all the time until DH finally shut that down. (She also has 2 brothers, 3 nephews over 40, 2 BIL and countless others within a 10 minute drive who could help her, but it had to be her baaaabbbyyyyy booooyyyyy.

Some gems from mine, mind you she usually only pulls this when nobody else can hear her, then denies it later:

*a few weeks post partum with DD1- "I know you're trying to lose weight, since you got so fat while pregnant, so I brought dessert for everyone else to help you with your self control

*Christmas after we had DD1, but before we married she addressed our Christmas card to DH and DD1 only, then proceeded at the family gathering to order me to take the pictures of the family, saying I can't be in them since "you're not really family" (but she was pregnant with SIL before they got married)

*to me the morning after my mom passed away in 2009: well, now that I'm DD1's only grandma we won't have to worry about her calling me Grandma (MIL firstname) will we?

*weekend after my dad passed away in 2011: so, now that I'm the only grandparent I won't have to share holidays with YOUR family anymore

*after I went back to work in 2010 after being a SAHM for 3 years (due to pay cut, hour cut at DH job): I can't believe you would let someone else raise your children

*in 2011 I had emergency laparoscopic surgery due to a rupturing ectopic pregnancy and while i was being prepped she told me I shouldn't bother DH at work, told me it was for the best- since I wouldn't be raising them myself (the kids were in daycare while I worked), told me 2 days after that I needed to "suck it up and support DH going back to work that day" (I was on strict orders not to lift, walk, carry anything, pretty much bed rest until cleared by my OB as I had lost a lot of blood, but I went back to work 6 days later. But 2 years prior when she had a partial hysterectomy, also laparoscopically, she took 6 weeks to recover and had his aunt move in to help)

She has been cut out, with only a few incidences in the past 2 years. 

Holy shit!

[mansplain]

Sept 10, 2013 15:42:07 GMT -5 trixieflips said:

Sept 10, 2013 13:31:34 GMT -5 firedancer49 said:

My MIL used to come over and before she would leave she would move things around in my house. Move picture locations, change decorations on shelves, etc. Pissed me off and she would do it when no one was paying attention. She has yet to do it in the new house.

She also always acts like she can't handle anything, ever. She lives about an hour away and calls DH for the dumbest things and asks him to come over and do whatever it is. She now just makes a list and we visit every so often and just check off of the list.

I think your MIL is related to mine. She especially liked to pull the second paragraph all the time until DH finally shut that down. (She also has 2 brothers, 3 nephews over 40, 2 BIL and countless others within a 10 minute drive who could help her, but it had to be her baaaabbbyyyyy booooyyyyy.

Some gems from mine, mind you she usually only pulls this when nobody else can hear her, then denies it later:

*a few weeks post partum with DD1- "I know you're trying to lose weight, since you got so fat while pregnant, so I brought dessert for everyone else to help you with your self control

*Christmas after we had DD1, but before we married she addressed our Christmas card to DH and DD1 only, then proceeded at the family gathering to order me to take the pictures of the family, saying I can't be in them since "you're not really family" (but she was pregnant with SIL before they got married)

*to me the morning after my mom passed away in 2009: well, now that I'm DD1's only grandma we won't have to worry about her calling me Grandma (MIL firstname) will we?

*weekend after my dad passed away in 2011: so, now that I'm the only grandparent I won't have to share holidays with YOUR family anymore

*after I went back to work in 2010 after being a SAHM for 3 years (due to pay cut, hour cut at DH job): I can't believe you would let someone else raise your children

*in 2011 I had emergency laparoscopic surgery due to a rupturing ectopic pregnancy and while i was being prepped she told me I shouldn't bother DH at work, told me it was for the best- since I wouldn't be raising them myself (the kids were in daycare while I worked), told me 2 days after that I needed to "suck it up and support DH going back to work that day" (I was on strict orders not to lift, walk, carry anything, pretty much bed rest until cleared by my OB as I had lost a lot of blood, but I went back to work 6 days later. But 2 years prior when she had a partial hysterectomy, also laparoscopically, she took 6 weeks to recover and had his aunt move in to help)

She has been cut out, with only a few incidences in the past 2 years. 

WTF??!!

[jenna]

I almost feel bad *liking* some of these posts, but some of these MILs have done or said some crazy things.

*Liking* them means "OMG, Can't believe she did/said that."



ETA:  Just read the entire thread, and some of these posts are so horrible.  Some of these go way beyond simply being rude.  

I'm sorry that some of you have shitty MILs.

[sneetch]

Sept 10, 2013 10:32:40 GMT -5 eb777888 said:

She ALWAYS says, like at least 15 times in the last ten years "oh, Patrick breastfed for 18 months. All my other kids weaned on their own but not Patrick, he just loved the breast. The doctor asked 'what are you feeding this boy?' and I said 'just the breast, he never stops eating!'.." OMG. It annoys H so much. lol

I feel like you and I may have talked about this before, but MIL does the same thing!  "Baby A would take a bottle, but Baby J, he would only feed from the breast.  Every 2 hours for a year, he was on my chest."  My H HATES it.

[mandy0810]

Sept 10, 2013 15:42:07 GMT -5 trixieflips said:

Some gems from mine, mind you she usually only pulls this when nobody else can hear her, then denies it later:


*to me the morning after my mom passed away in 2009: well, now that I'm DD1's only grandma we won't have to worry about her calling me Grandma (MIL firstname) will we?

*weekend after my dad passed away in 2011: so, now that I'm the only grandparent I won't have to share holidays with YOUR family anymore

Fucking bitch. I would have killed her right then and there.

[moolarkey]

For those with re-decorating MILs, do you ever move stuff around in their house when you go over there? I would.

[W.T.Faulkner]

I'm so afraid that my mom will be a MIL like this.

[LeggsBenedict]

Sept 10, 2013 16:08:55 GMT -5 moolarkey said:

For those with re-decorating MILs, do you ever move stuff around in their house when you go over there? I would.

I tend to just not go over there.

[eb777888]

Sept 10, 2013 16:01:56 GMT -5 sneetch said:

Sept 10, 2013 10:32:40 GMT -5 eb777888 said:

She ALWAYS says, like at least 15 times in the last ten years "oh, Patrick breastfed for 18 months. All my other kids weaned on their own but not Patrick, he just loved the breast. The doctor asked 'what are you feeding this boy?' and I said 'just the breast, he never stops eating!'.." OMG. It annoys H so much. lol

I feel like you and I may have talked about this before, but MIL does the same thing!  "Baby A would take a bottle, but Baby J, he would only feed from the breast.  Every 2 hours for a year, he was on my chest."  My H HATES it.

Yes, we have! lol

It actually goes to show my MIL isn't that bad when I have to tell the same awful story. And it really bugs H more than me!

[VeryViolet]

Sept 10, 2013 16:17:23 GMT -5 W.T.Faulkner said:

I'm so afraid that my mom will be a MIL like this.

This is a broad generalization but I think it is harder for the mother of a girl to be the crazy MIL. Just because I think generally women see the petty, passive-aggressive bullshit for what it is and call their mom's out on it. DH is all clueless at half the manipulative shit his mom tries to pull so even though he 100% has my back there are still a lot of opportunities for her nonsense. When my mom tries to lay a guilt trip or whatever I just tell her no and move on. Sometimes she gets butthurt but she gets over it. I also am a lot more comfortable having a backbone with the woman that birthed me than with my psycho MIL. It works both ways. It reminds me of a story a good friend told me where her MIL kept talking about how she was blonde when she very clearly has grey/white hair. My friend told me that is why she wants a daughter because when she is 65 she doesn't want to be in that much denial and a daughter would never let you be that ridiculous.

I have shared a lot of fun MIL stories here but one of my favorites is when we were engaged and talking about getting married in my childhood church. My MIL called my husband and told him that he didn't have to convert to Catholicism for me and not to do anything he didn't want to do. It took 45 minutes for him to convince her I wasn't forcing him to do anything against his will. The best part is I am not particularly religious anymore it was just the church where my parents had married, my sister and I were baptized, etc. so it had special meaning. 

[Deleted]

Re: monster-in-law

I had limited contact with her after the first few years. It took DH a while to see how MIL really is, since it was usually never done with witnesses. But I did cut her right out after the comments about my parents. You'd think she would be understanding as she lost her husband (FIL) 8 years ago, but nope. I think I screamed for her to get the f^ck out of my house, never talk to me again and she can rot in hell at the comment after my dad died. I was numb when my mom died- I was 14 weeks pregnant, it was very sudden and I was basically on auto pilot, so it took me a while to process it.

She sucks at life. Probably why SIL and her DH live 7 hours away....

[disappointedkittens]

Wow I can't believe the stories in here! Mine really isn't that bad I guess.

We are Canadian and bought a crib on a trip to the US. The crib specifically said that it met Canadian safety standards. MIL freaked out and gave a 10 minute lecture during which she kept dropping things like "it's a shame you'd endager your child's life to save a couple of bucks" and "just think of how badly you'll feel when your baby gets injured because of this".
She also keeps insisting that our baby sleep in a bassinet that FIL built himself. Because obviously that's been through thorough safety testing.

[4speedy]

My DH always says his mother never lets the truth get in the way of a good story.  And she is always the hero of her stories and everyone else is always an imbecile.  She told me these two stories in one breath.

When she was about two years old, to the best of her memory because as she recalls, she was still in a perambulator (that's what 80 year olds call a stroller), she saw her grandfather having a fit.  A "fit" is what we would today call a seizure.  Well anyway, she had to climb out of the perambulator and run for help because nobody else was around.  She saved her grandfather's life that day.

Then, when MIL was 13, she was visiting her cousin, who was PG.  MIL took one look at her cousin and just knew she wasn't carrying that baby right.  MIL told her cousin to get to the doctor as quickly as possible and ask him to "take the baby right now!"   The cousin ignored MIL's medical advice and later died in childbirth and so did the baby because the cord was wrapped around the baby's neck.

 This is also a very popular recurring theme in MIL's stories, everyone else is stupid and when people don't listen to MIL, bad things always happen.

 And she was a fucking medical genius as a child.

[Some Funny Name]

My MIL is batshit crazy, and everyone knows it. I have seen her take a whizz at a gas pump. DH, me, SIL, and FIL were all in the car. I have also seen her take a whizz next to her car in a very crowded parking lot (NO empty spaces or vehicles) at a 4th of July fireworks show. I wish I were lying.

Everytime she tells the story of DH's birth, it grows. Apparently, he was born in an elevator, with Jimmy Carter and a bunch of nuns present. She freaks the fuck out and exaggerates about everything, to the point where, whenever someone in the family gets a hysterical phone call from her, they immediately call someone else to find out what happened. Shortly after we were married, DH was in an accident where he was injured and a friend was critically injured. After DH had surgery and was released from the hospital and I got him home and put to bed, I called her and calmly explained that he had been in an accident, but was okay and resting at home. I immediately got about 5 phone calls from others in the family wanting to know what happened because, according to MIL, DH was clinging to life by the thinnest of threads. Drama fucking queen.

[reider19]

Sept 10, 2013 15:42:07 GMT -5 trixieflips said:

I think your MIL is related to mine. She especially liked to pull the second paragraph all the time until DH finally shut that down. (She also has 2 brothers, 3 nephews over 40, 2 BIL and countless others within a 10 minute drive who could help her, but it had to be her baaaabbbyyyyy booooyyyyy.

Some gems from mine, mind you she usually only pulls this when nobody else can hear her, then denies it later:

*a few weeks post partum with DD1- "I know you're trying to lose weight, since you got so fat while pregnant, so I brought dessert for everyone else to help you with your self control

*Christmas after we had DD1, but before we married she addressed our Christmas card to DH and DD1 only, then proceeded at the family gathering to order me to take the pictures of the family, saying I can't be in them since "you're not really family" (but she was pregnant with SIL before they got married)

*to me the morning after my mom passed away in 2009: well, now that I'm DD1's only grandma we won't have to worry about her calling me Grandma (MIL firstname) will we?

*weekend after my dad passed away in 2011: so, now that I'm the only grandparent I won't have to share holidays with YOUR family anymore

*after I went back to work in 2010 after being a SAHM for 3 years (due to pay cut, hour cut at DH job): I can't believe you would let someone else raise your children

*in 2011 I had emergency laparoscopic surgery due to a rupturing ectopic pregnancy and while i was being prepped she told me I shouldn't bother DH at work, told me it was for the best- since I wouldn't be raising them myself (the kids were in daycare while I worked), told me 2 days after that I needed to "suck it up and support DH going back to work that day" (I was on strict orders not to lift, walk, carry anything, pretty much bed rest until cleared by my OB as I had lost a lot of blood, but I went back to work 6 days later. But 2 years prior when she had a partial hysterectomy, also laparoscopically, she took 6 weeks to recover and had his aunt move in to help)

She has been cut out, with only a few incidences in the past 2 years. 

What the HELL?!

[lightyears]

my ex-mil hit me.

the end.