no way. she slapped the back of my head in the kitchen ON THANKSGIVING about an hour before 20 or so people were going to arrive at my house. i stayed silent because a: she's terrifying and b: it was fucking thanksgiving.
she was never invited into my house again.
eta: i should say, she hit me for absolutely no reason whatsoever. in my own home.
no way. she slapped the back of my head in the kitchen ON THANKSGIVING about an hour before 20 or so people were going to arrive at my house. i stayed silent because a: she's terrifying and b: it was fucking thanksgiving.
she was never invited into my house again.
eta: i should say, she hit me for absolutely no reason whatsoever. in my own home.
Post by glassofsyrah on Sept 10, 2013 19:16:48 GMT -5
You are all making me so very, very thankful that my MIL is normal. Thank you. And I am so sorry you have to deal with all of this craziness. Holy shit.
My DH always says his mother never lets the truth get in the way of a good story. And she is always the hero of her stories and everyone else is always an imbecile. She told me these two stories in one breath.
When she was about two years old, to the best of her memory because as she recalls, she was still in a perambulator (that's what 80 year olds call a stroller), she saw her grandfather having a fit. A "fit" is what we would today call a seizure. Well anyway, she had to climb out of the perambulator and run for help because nobody else was around. She saved her grandfather's life that day.
no way. she slapped the back of my head in the kitchen ON THANKSGIVING about an hour before 20 or so people were going to arrive at my house. i stayed silent because a: she's terrifying and b: it was fucking thanksgiving.
she was never invited into my house again.
eta: i should say, she hit me for absolutely no reason whatsoever. in my own home.
Shaddup no way! What a nutter! What did your XH say/do?
When she tried to give me her original 1970s LLL breast feeding book and I politely declined since I had two great books at home already, she said, "Well, this really is the best!" Because, jeez if I had had that book suddenly my kid would have had a great latch and my breast would have made milk up the wazoo. Dumb Cleo!
And there have been plenty of comments about the size of my children's stomach (both of them at different times), how much am I actually working with them, and after being on bedrest and then having a baby asked, "Is Cleo finally cooking again?"
Post by CurlyQ284 on Sept 10, 2013 20:09:05 GMT -5
MIL is sweet sweet sweet. Love her. FIL...is... a trip. Apparently the government is planning for the US, Canada and Mexico to become one country. They've already started printing the money, they're storing it in a secure location (but probably Fort Knox). Also said, in front of my SDs, that we need to have a boy to carry on the family name/be an heir/play football with etc etc etc. I remind everyone that girls are able to keep their names and SD1 or SD2 can easily take his precious family name to greatness. I usually tried to usher them out of the room when he starts in. They don't need to hear that crap.
He also referred to DS by a nickname that I hate even though I ask him to stop or correct him with his real name. By the end of our weeklong visit I had enough. He said it again and I said "Gee FIL, I'm really worried about you. I keep telling you his name and you haven't been able to remember. I'm a little concerned about your declining mental abilities. We'll have to find you a nice nursing home with a security desk so you don't get out and wander the streets and hurt yourself." DH laughed really hard and FIL used the correct name for the last 24 hours.
Also, my dad apparently met Bill Gates and helped him with some code back in the day before Microsoft was big. And he met Vincent van Gogh at an art show even thought he died in 1890. My mom is sweet too. Just the dads in our case.
Post by bluetopaz on Sept 10, 2013 20:28:58 GMT -5
Mine can hardly compare, but I just wanted to post--and maybe issue a warning to future pregnant women with my coloring-- that the sole reason I got gestational diabetes is because I'm a blue eyed blonde. Yup.
Post by catwithspots on Sept 10, 2013 20:36:46 GMT -5
Do you remember 6 or 7 years ago there were several news stories circulating about a rise in the bee (or was it mosquitos?) population and new breed of super bees (mosquitos?) from Africa were migrating to North America? These super bugs were reportedly infected with dangerous viruses?
Well....My MIL insisted these super bugs were created by the "Iraq-people" and this was a form of chemical warfare. She made everyone in the family get a flu shot. She called DH everyday asking if he got his shot, then cried when he said no to the shot.
Mine can hardly compare, but I just wanted to post--and maybe issue a warning to future pregnant women with my coloring-- that the sole reason I got gestational diabetes is because I'm a blue eyed blonde. Yup.
Post by justmeandmydog on Sept 10, 2013 20:50:21 GMT -5
There are so many, but the one that takes the cake... XMIL was always making it a point/subject that she wanted grandchildren(this started when we'd been dating), like at that moment (didn't matter that I wanted to finish college/find a full time job/get married/etc first). After we'd been engaged for a few months, she left the room one day and came back with a small clothing box and asked me to open in. Inside was a hand-knit baby sweater and booties from XH grandmother. my XMIL asked her to make it because " she might not be around by the time you want kids."
There is so much crazy in the thread!! I'm sorry all of you have to deal with this stupid crap. We can all take comfort in not being alone in the crazy MIL boat
Post by fuckyourcouch on Sept 10, 2013 21:10:46 GMT -5
/cracks knuckles
we have no relationship with MIL/FIL. some of these are why:
1. she told me she didn't like me because i wasn't blonde and didn't ask her to go shopping with me and my friends 2. she got mad at me for going wedding dress shopping with my mom. she insisted i promised her i would go with her. um, no. 3. she is super vain and made shitty comments about people in public, on tv, etc. all the time. once i called her out when she said a girl on some tv competition had "a good voice, too bad she's so fat" - i said, "yes, because only thin people have value to society." and she got mad. 4. she was a hypochondriac and super dramatic, coupled with an addictive tanner and pretty much all she ate was fast food and tea with 234 cups of sugar. then she complained nonstop about the effects. 5. after we got engaged, we went to lunch with her one day. her friend's daughter was the waitress. she tried to get my h to ask her friend's kid out. in front of me. WHILE WE WERE ENGAGED. she saw no problem. my h told her she was ridiculous and we left. 6. she would ask me questions but stare at my h or any other male in the room. 7. she just could never remember anything about me. in the 4 years we spoke to them during our dating/engagement, she could not "remember" my college major, career plans, preferences, etc. however, somehow, she could remember to tell me i should take an oil & gas job in dallas all the fucking time, so we would be close to her. 8. after she got mad i went dress shopping with my mom, she emailed my h and told him since my mom got to do that, my parents weren't allowed to participate in anything else for the wedding. when he told her that was stupid, she said she hoped we hurried up and got divorced. 9. she insists on being ignorant, like the time she was telling me about a "pamplet" she received and i could not figure out wtf she was referring to. finally i figured out she meant pamphlet. she insisted pamplet was correct and then said she would show me in the dictionary. then when she saw she was wrong, she said, "well, i've been saying it this long so i don't care." ummm ok.
i could go on and on but this is already long. lol
I'm so afraid that my mom will be a MIL like this.
My mom is sort of becoming this. My h works in retail and occasionally my parents stop in where he works. Apparently my mom makes a big scene when she sees h, calling him this annoying kiddy name (think instead of Howard she'd say Howie), and giving him a big ole hug. While he's working, usually with lots of contractors/customers around and other coworkers. It embarrasses the crap out of h but he's too nice to say anything to her. I've tried to tell her to stop but she pretty much ignores me.
She's also been whining about wanting grand kids since we were dating and both in college, no real jobs, horrible rental, and could barely keep ourselves in ramen noodles. She's only now dropped it because my dad snapped at her one day at lunch (at cracker barrel lol) about how she needed to mind her own business and maybe we didn't want kids yet and that she of all people should remember that you can't just decide to have a baby and snap your fingers and suddenly be pregnant (they struggled with IF and never could have another kid). I love my dad.
My inlaws are amazing, it's my mom that you have to watch.
My MIL got super drunk at our wedding, fell, said that DH pushed her, in which Dh's brother punches DH and MIL gets off the ground and starts spewing horrible things about me to DH as I was standing right there. Dh walks away, FIL comes out (he and MIL are divorced) asks BIL and MIL to leave in which SFIL pushes FIL and BIL comes running back in and punches FIL, his own dad, in the head.
All this at a black tie wedding. Yep.
And this is why we (me and DH) dont drink. Or live near his family.
My MIL got super drunk at our wedding, fell, said that DH pushed her, in which Dh's brother punches DH and MIL gets off the ground and starts spewing horrible things about me to DH as I was standing right there. Dh walks away, FIL comes out (he and MIL are divorced) asks BIL and MIL to leave in which SFIL pushes FIL and BIL comes running back in and punches FIL, his own dad, in the head.
All this at a black tie wedding. Yep.
And this is why we (me and DH) dont drink. Or live near his family.
My MIL got super drunk at our wedding, fell, said that DH pushed her, in which Dh's brother punches DH and MIL gets off the ground and starts spewing horrible things about me to DH as I was standing right there. Dh walks away, FIL comes out (he and MIL are divorced) asks BIL and MIL to leave in which SFIL pushes FIL and BIL comes running back in and punches FIL, his own dad, in the head.
All this at a black tie wedding. Yep.
And this is why we (me and DH) dont drink. Or live near his family.
So how are the holidays?!?
Ha ha ha. When we go visit, we stay in a hotel and go for dinner. They usually act out by dessert (they have downed a bottle or two of wine by then) and we leave. It is awesome.
Post by SadieBear on Sept 10, 2013 22:59:17 GMT -5
We had a surprise pregancy (ended in mc at 13 weeks) when we were dating. Told MIL about the baby when I was about 7 weeks. She cornered me by myself and told me I was ruining DHs life and that I was going to move in with them 6 hrs away from DH to have their help raising the baby. Then when I miscarried she asked when we were going to try again. WTF? This was 5 1/2 years ago and to this day she has not ever apologized.
Also this past summer she tried to give out 2 year old Coke at 11 pm. Asked in a snotty voice "what should I give him, granola?" Then the next day she was telling DH's family about it behind my back like I was the one in the wrong.
These are just the tip of the iceburg. I try to tolerate her best I can but sometimes my husband hears the true amount of dislike I have for her.
A couple weeks before our wedding my MIL complained how she will possibly die on the plane from having a panic attack from her fear of flying and then said she didn't understand why the wedding was in my hometown and not DH's. She said we were selfish by making her travel and DH mentioned how my mom had just had a lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy done because she had breast cancer and was about to start radiation so she couldn't travel. her response was "So? I don't see the problem." She did not go attend our wedding, wasting a $500 ticket that was gifted to her, and we did not to speak to her til about Thanksgiving where again she said more fucked up things and we skipped the holiday to avoid her.
Post by Some Funny Name on Sept 11, 2013 0:19:52 GMT -5
Smudgee, that sounds like a family wedding i attended last year, except MIL wasnt wearing any panties & crotch flashed everyone when she fell. Did we marry into the same family? Lol.
When we told MIL I was pregnant with twins, she said it must be because we had sex 2 days in a row. I think I just gave her a deer in headlights look. My grandmother inlaw says strange stuff too. When the twins were born, she kept saying that people kill their kids ya know?! It was getting really disturbing. She also always asks if we are selling them and their cost. It's awkward, especially since she's deaf and can't hear the shock in people's voices as they despond.
My MIL used to come over and before she would leave she would move things around in my house. Move picture locations, change decorations on shelves, etc. Pissed me off and she would do it when no one was paying attention. She has yet to do it in the new house.
She also always acts like she can't handle anything, ever. She lives about an hour away and calls DH for the dumbest things and asks him to come over and do whatever it is. She now just makes a list and we visit every so often and just check off of the list.
I think your MIL is related to mine. She especially liked to pull the second paragraph all the time until DH finally shut that down. (She also has 2 brothers, 3 nephews over 40, 2 BIL and countless others within a 10 minute drive who could help her, but it had to be her baaaabbbyyyyy booooyyyyy.
Some gems from mine, mind you she usually only pulls this when nobody else can hear her, then denies it later:
*a few weeks post partum with DD1- "I know you're trying to lose weight, since you got so fat while pregnant, so I brought dessert for everyone else to help you with your self control
*Christmas after we had DD1, but before we married she addressed our Christmas card to DH and DD1 only, then proceeded at the family gathering to order me to take the pictures of the family, saying I can't be in them since "you're not really family" (but she was pregnant with SIL before they got married)
*to me the morning after my mom passed away in 2009: well, now that I'm DD1's only grandma we won't have to worry about her calling me Grandma (MIL firstname) will we?
*weekend after my dad passed away in 2011: so, now that I'm the only grandparent I won't have to share holidays with YOUR family anymore
*after I went back to work in 2010 after being a SAHM for 3 years (due to pay cut, hour cut at DH job): I can't believe you would let someone else raise your children
*in 2011 I had emergency laparoscopic surgery due to a rupturing ectopic pregnancy and while i was being prepped she told me I shouldn't bother DH at work, told me it was for the best- since I wouldn't be raising them myself (the kids were in daycare while I worked), told me 2 days after that I needed to "suck it up and support DH going back to work that day" (I was on strict orders not to lift, walk, carry anything, pretty much bed rest until cleared by my OB as I had lost a lot of blood, but I went back to work 6 days later. But 2 years prior when she had a partial hysterectomy, also laparoscopically, she took 6 weeks to recover and had his aunt move in to help)
She has been cut out, with only a few incidences in the past 2 years.
OMG. RAGE. There would not be enough people in the room to contain me from flipping my shit.
I'm so afraid that my mom will be a MIL like this.
My mom is sort of becoming this. My h works in retail and occasionally my parents stop in where he works. Apparently my mom makes a big scene when she sees h, calling him this annoying kiddy name (think instead of Howard she'd say Howie), and giving him a big ole hug. While he's working, usually with lots of contractors/customers around and other coworkers. It embarrasses the crap out of h but he's too nice to say anything to her. I've tried to tell her to stop but she pretty much ignores me.
She's also been whining about wanting grand kids since we were dating and both in college, no real jobs, horrible rental, and could barely keep ourselves in ramen noodles. She's only now dropped it because my dad snapped at her one day at lunch (at cracker barrel lol) about how she needed to mind her own business and maybe we didn't want kids yet and that she of all people should remember that you can't just decide to have a baby and snap your fingers and suddenly be pregnant (they struggled with IF and never could have another kid). I love my dad.
My inlaws are amazing, it's my mom that you have to watch.
Yeah, my mom is one of those MILs. She's lucky my SIL is a saint.
At their bridal shower, my mother's gift was lingerie. Her defense was "We all know they're going to have sex." I told her that there was nothing creepier than your MIL getting involved in your sex life, and it was likely that she'd never wear it. She got all huffy.
My brother and his wife came down to my parent's house one evening around 8. My mother hovers over my brother, asking him if he'd like anything to eat (in this sickly sweet, singsongy kind of voice you use around babies). He told her no, they had just finished dinner about an hour ago. She kept pressing it, asking if he'd had enough, etc., until I finally said, in a very loud voice "MOM, STOP IT. HE SAID HE'S JUST HAD DINNER AND HE'S FULL. HE'S A GROWN MAN, I THINK HE WOULD KNOW IF HE HAS EATEN ENOUGH OR NOT." She still didn't see how this behavior could be insulting to my SIL.
She would continually complain to me about how my brother and his wife were raising the kids, and all the stuff they were doing that was going to harm the children. Reminding her of some of the shit she did to her own kids that wasn't okay way back when wasn't enough to shut her up, so I started telling her to call the child abuse hotline. It was the only thing that made her stop.