Well... yes. But w/ DHs parents, I keep a distance from them. They frustrate me and I dont' want to be close to them.
But DHs extended family (which is huge on his dad's side) I love. Absolutely love. They are all over the country and we make a point to try and visit them as best we can. In July we're actually going on vacation w/ one part of the extended family. Can't wait.
I don't know if I am going to explain this well. I don't necessarily feel like they are my family but I do my very best to make sure I treat them like family.
"Why would you ruin perfectly good peanuts by adding candy corn? That's like saying hey, I have these awesome nachos, guess I better add some dryer lint." - Nonny
Post by NothingWrongwithOhio on May 20, 2014 9:17:40 GMT -5
I'm getting there. I'm SIL's MOH and I spend long periods of time talking to MIL on the phone. I think this consideration has more to do with what I've known as family for most of my life and what it really is.
I used to, now H doesn't even consider them family and considers my family his family. The other day he half jokingly mentioned wanting to change his last name to my maiden name to remove any association from his family. It's sad, but their true colors came shining through this past year and we realized they are not the people we thought they were.
No. And they definitely treat me different than their kids. Of course MIL also differentiates between her kids and her step kids. (Not in a super obvious way, but if watch long enough you can pick up on things)
We all like each other (mostly) but it's still more formal feeling then when I'm with my family.
Sadly, no. The longer I know them, the more disgusted I get with them (we've been together for 12 years). Plus, my family treats DH as more of a family member than his own family. I resent his family for that. Now DH's aunt and uncle... I would consider family. They are amazing people. They treat DH more like a son than a nephew. They also treat our son more like a grandson. I love them to pieces.
Yes. My in-laws are like the parents I would have dreamt up when I was a little girl. They are supportive to a fault, fun, intelligent and have all the same interests I do. It took longer with my SIL, because we don't see her as often, but I love her and I'm really glad I have a chance to have a "big sister."
I didn't for a long time, but over the years I'm starting to. They're a great family, so it's not that I don't like them; it's just that my family is my family, and his family is his.
Yes...well, at least his parents. When we talked about divorce, one of the reasons I felt so hurt was because I felt like I was going to lose his family...though his mom has told me that I'm her daughter, no matter what my legal status is with her son.
Post by Dumbledork on May 20, 2014 10:05:05 GMT -5
Some of them? Kinda?
His Great-Aunt is a lovely person and I've stayed at her house without DH. I consider her family, but probably not close family. If we needed to ask a favor of her, I'd probably task it out to DH, whereas I'd have no problem asking someone from my own family for the same favor. His aunt and "second" mom are also very close to us, and I'd consider them family as well. I sent his "second" mom a message on Mother's Day from myself.
The people on his side that I've never met or have only spoken to once or twice? They're DD's family, but I have a harder time considering them mine. I could probably say the same about some of my own backwoods family members that I've never met though. They're technically family, but they're not who I think of when I say "let's get the family together."
Absolutely I do. My own family was a little off when DH and I first started dating, but his family welcomed me with open arms. Now, he considers my family his as well (except when they act psycho) lol
No. I'm fond of most of them, we have a great relationship, we get along, but they are not my family just as my family is not his family and that's okay with us.
Post by hopecounts on May 20, 2014 10:58:45 GMT -5
Yes. To me we are all one big extended family. But I am lucky in that my MIL is wonderful and we get along well. She also makes a real effort to treat me as one of her own and make me feel like I am part of her family which helps. FIL and I aren't as close but he is a good guy and we get along fine.
Post by pantsparty on May 20, 2014 11:16:51 GMT -5
I do love them, but I think of them more like cousins, like RexManningDay says. My H's dad is deceased and his mom is crazytown, so really it's just his siblings and their kids, and we do love them to death. We are going to see them for Thanksgiving and I'm really looking forward to it.